Our world has changed every time I turn on the TV. It seems to get a little scarier and a lot more uncertain with every passing day. Whether it’s due to mass shootings, terrorist plots, racial tension, or extreme weather, on some days it feels like the sky may actually be falling. But even on cloudless days it is an intimidating and daunting time to raise children in our changing world.
We have a choice: we can let the world change us, or we can change the world.
When my husband and I were handed our pink and blue bundles of joy, we didn’t plan to raise world changers. But the moment we started teaching them to put others first, we discovered that small acts of kindness and compassion do change the world. Mostly, however, they change us.
Honestly, our lives today look nothing like I thought they would. I spent the first half of my married life trying to create a happier life for my family. But instead of feeling satisfied with all that filled our home and hearts, we felt hollow and empty. When we began giving to others, we discovered that we didn’t have less for ourselves, we had more. So, yes, our lives are different than I planned—they are better.
This book is about finding the profound and complete joy that comes from sacrificially sharing what we have been given—our time, talents, and wallets—with those who have less. It’s about living sacrificially in front of our kids and accepting the hard truth Jesus teaches: our abundance isn’t for us to keep. It is given to us to be given away. When we follow Jesus in this way, we discover the unfathomable satisfaction, soul-quenching purpose, and unparalleled contentment that come when we give our lives away.
Parenting in a changing world changes us. My family has witnessed this firsthand. We are learning what matters and what doesn’t. We teach our kids that giving doesn’t make us poor, but it does cost us. Mother Teresa once said, “You must give what will cost you something. This is giving not just what you can live without, but what you can’t live without, or don’t want to live without. . . . Then your gift becomes a sacrifice, which will have value before God. This giving until it hurts—this sacrifice—is what I call love in action.”1 This kind of love-driven giving has a high cost, but we keep paying it because the value we receive is higher.
God’s divine will is for us to be generous and for us to raise givers. But sometimes the space between his sovereign plan for our lives on the one hand and the redemption of our problems, our pain, and the wayward path we choose on the other hand is difficult to comprehend. It’s much easier to trace the redemptive thread he weaves through the seasons of our lives once we’ve lived them. In the uncertain times living with joy is often discovered not in our gains but in what we give away. We find we are helped when we stop to help others. There is a deep, abiding, secret joy in sharing the kingdom of heaven.
In the pages of this book we will take a closer look at the life stories of modern-day givers as we address the following issues and their place in our homes: the sovereignty of God, timing, redemption, brave generosity, and how God often uses our discomfort to draw people to him.
We will also talk about joy. If we polled parents across North America most would probably say their number-one goal for their children is to be successful and happy. But the actor Jim Carrey, who has been described as both, says, “I think everybody should get rich and famous and do everything they ever dreamed of so they can see that it’s not the answer.”2 Sustainable joy is found in this truth: “There is more happiness in giving than in receiving” (Acts 20:35 GNT).
In this book we will also talk about our personal motivations for this kind of living and how God has established eternity with rewards in mind. At the end of every chapter are helpful conversation starters in the form of questions that my kids will take turns answering. Hopefully this will offer some perspective on growing up in this culture—the obstacles and challenges and how they find joy in giving.
The book you hold in your hands is filled with personal, holy, and breathtaking stories of brokenhearted kingdom hunters who have impacted our family’s story. They met Jesus face-to-face in the middle of their giving, and it made them want to give their lives away too. We join them in discovering the secret to true joy: giving is receiving.
Perhaps the most powerful lesson we teach our children is that their unique places and positions in life are not for their convenience; they are for God’s glory. David Platt puts it like this: “The most glorious reason you exist is for the proclamation of the glory of God to the ends of the world. And it’s more than having a nice life.”3
This book will not offer quick fixes or easy answers in our unstable world. But if you’re hunting for more joy in our changing world and deep-seated, unparalleled joy in your home that isn’t dependent on culture, class, or chaos, the pages of this book are a good place to start.
Raising kids to be generous with their time, abilities, and even their small resources builds deep-rooted character. Isn’t our goal to establish in them an unshakable foundation that cannot be swayed in a shifting world? Character building through the filter of giving teaches our kids the beauty of sacrifice, the value of hard work, the peace in pursuing God’s glory, and the joy of putting others first. This is our purpose. This is what keeps us living and giving in a changing world.