The word sex is linked to a wide territory of behavior in the American culture, which is confusing to lots of teens as well as adults. Sometimes they think that “everybody’s doing it,” when really it’s all a bunch of bragging. Magazines and the media geared for adults don’t help in eliminating teen confusion on the issue, and quite frankly lots of adults are befuddled on the subject too!
Let’s get the most important issue out of the way first: Nobody can tell you what to do with your body. That’s your decision and it should be a private one. Having sex won’t make you cool, grown up, or raise your self-esteem (no matter how old you are). How do you know when you’re ready? If you feel pressured in any way, nervous or frightened, you are definitely not ready. Don’t fall for the old line, “But if you loved me, you’d have sex with me.” If this person tells you that he or she won’t see you anymore, or will break up with you because you won’t have sex, then they aren’t worth your time. You’re too good for them! Be glad you found out how shallow they are now rather than later, when the breakup would be more painful. Sex should be a beautiful, loving experience be-tween two people, not done on a dare because you think it will increase your popularity (it won’t—just the opposite will happen), because your friend did it, because you think it will show your prowess and make you look cool, or because your partner thinks you should do it. If in doubt, you might want to talk to an older person whom you can trust about how you feel on this issue.
Sex and Risk
There are physical and emotional risks to any sexual encounter. For example, girls who start having sex before the age of eighteen tend to have more health problems, including a higher chance of contracting cervical cancer. Catching a sexually transmitted disease (STD) like chla-mydia, herpes, lice, trichomoniasis, genital warts, gonorrhea, syphilis, and AIDS is also a very real danger, and you need to know that herpes, genital warts, and AIDS cannot be cured—ever—and if you don’t catch those diseases that can be treated right away, the consequences to your long-term health can be very serious, even deadly. According to one recent study, one out of every eight teenagers contracts STDs. If you think you have contracted an STD, don’t be embarrassed to find medical help. Get treatment right away; don’t wait. There is also the risk of pregnancy, which is a very real consequence of sexual activity. A baby is a very big responsibility. If you aren’t ready for that, think twice. Finally, people have sex for different reasons and emotions, and self-esteem issues play a large part in sexual activity, including later feelings of self-worth. There’s always a chance that your feelings may be hurt because of a misunderstanding. The difference between sex and love is volatile ground. With all these risks, many young people do choose to wait. This is called abstinence.
Safe Sex
Naturally the safest sex is no sex at all, but that’s not particularly logical, bearing in mind that sexual desire and the actions thereof are naturally wired into the human process, and seem to be especially rampant when your hormones fire during the teen years (and possibly early twenties, depending upon your physical makeup). To protect yourself and your partner, you should use a lubricated latex condom and a spermicide with nonoxynol-9 (read the label to make sure it has this ingredient). These products are not 100 percent safe, but they will help lower the risk of contracting an STD or getting pregnant. Even if you are on the pill (drug used to inhibit pregnancy), there is still the risk of an STD. Also, some antibiotics can make the pill totally ineffective. Always check with your doctor if you are on the pill and taking other medications. You may not be as safe as you think. Be sure to read all packages and instructions that accompany birth control devices to ensure their proper use. If you don’t understand the directions, talk to a health care professional or visit a clinic.
To Learn More about STDs
National STD Hotline: 800-227-8922
National AIDS Hotline: 800-342-2437 (English); 800-344-7432 (Spanish)
http://www.iwannaknow.org: Answers to questions about teen’s sexual health.
Or browse through the FDA website: http://www.fda.gov