22
THE DAY OF PHOEBE’S BIRTHDAY PARTY dawned cold but sunny. Deirdre leapt out of bed, full of purpose and excitement for the day ahead, ready for the preparations that needed to be done.
But first she had a mission. She rummaged in the back of her closet, pulled out her floral hat box, and opened the lid. Inside sat her treasured china doll dressed in blue velvet. Angelina had blond ringlets, blue eyes that blinked, and red lips. Deirdre stroked the hair with reverent fingers, waves of nostalgia making her smile. Angelina had been her favorite toy as a child. Deirdre only hoped the doll would bring Phoebe half as much joy.
Carefully, she returned the toy to the box and, using some ribbon she had in her top drawer, tied a bow on the top. Then she set the gift on the dresser for later.
After a quick breakfast, Deirdre found the bag of decorations in the hall closet and headed into the living room. She’d only started to sort through the contents when Brianna breezed in, armed with her own supplies.
“This is a wonderful idea.” Bree kissed Deirdre’s cheek in greeting. “My children are almost as excited as if it were their own birthday. Gil’s keeping them busy until it’s time to come over.”
Deirdre paused from sorting rolls of ribbon. “I can’t believe Phoebe has never had a birthday party.”
Brianna set her bag on a chair. “Never?”
Deirdre shook her head. “She lost her mother, then lived in a sanatorium for over a year. She’s hardly been around anyone but her nanny ever since.”
“That poor child. I can’t imagine what she’s been through.” Tears welled on Brianna’s lashes. She sat down hard on the sofa and pulled out a handkerchief.
Deirdre laid the ribbon down with a frown. Brianna had always been the sister most prone to tears, but this display seemed unusual—even for her.
Deirdre crossed to sit beside her. “Is everything all right, honey?”
Bree dabbed her eyes. “Everything’s wonderful.” She gave a light laugh, her cheeks pinkening.
Deirdre’s mouth fell open. “You’re not?”
Brianna grinned. “I am.”
Deirdre grabbed her sister in a hard hug. “When?”
“In the spring.” She pulled back to dab at her cheeks. “Oh, Dee. I’ve been longing for another baby, but I felt so guilty. After all, we have three beautiful children already. How greedy is it to want more?”
“It’s not greedy to love children. You’re a wonderful mother. And I’m so happy you’ll get to welcome another child into your family.” Deirdre’s own eyes grew damp with happy tears, yet her delight was mixed with a twinge of regret that she would likely never experience this joy herself. “Looks like you and Colleen will have babies together again.”
Brianna beamed. “I must admit to feeling jealous when I heard she and Rylan were expecting. But now our children will have more playmates.” She leaned in to whisper, “And if my instincts are correct, I believe Adam and Maggie might be expecting as well.”
A spurt of envy twisted Deirdre’s heart. It seemed all her siblings, except she and Connor, had been blessed with large families. She took in a deep rasp of air and forced a smile. “That’s wonderful.”
As if sensing her sadness, Brianna squeezed her hand. “Don’t worry, honey. Your turn will come.”
She sighed. “I don’t think so, Bree. I believe God wants me to dedicate my life to my patients.” Resolutely, she pushed her regrets aside and got to her feet before her sister could argue with her. “We’d better get this room decorated before a certain birthday girl comes down.”
Matthew sat on a wingback chair in a corner of the O’Leary’s parlor and surveyed the mayhem surrounding him.
Children chased one another around the room, shouting and squealing, while the adults seemed able to carry on normal conversations around them. Surprisingly, Phoebe seemed unperturbed, right in the thick of it all.
Matthew tried unsuccessfully to remember the names of all Deirdre’s nieces and nephews. He had a hard enough time getting her siblings and their spouses straight. Rylan and Colleen, he’d learned, ran an orphanage in Manhattan and had two adopted children plus two boys of their own. And judging from Colleen’s expansive middle, they expected their next child very soon. Deirdre’s oldest brother, Adam, and his wife, Maggie, lived in the city as well with their three kids. Brianna and Gil’s were the only children he could tell apart.
Deirdre walked to the middle of the room and gave a shrill whistle. Amazingly, everyone stopped, and for two blessed seconds, silence reigned.
“All right, it’s time for cake and presents.”
A loud whoop went up, followed by another ear-splitting whistle.
“We’ll only have cake if everyone is seated quietly.” Deirdre paused to look pointedly at her nephews elbowing each other. “Find yourselves a chair or a spot on the floor. Phoebe, come here, sweetheart.”
While the other children raced to find seats, Phoebe approached Deirdre with a hint of trepidation on her face.
Deirdre pulled over a fancy chair and motioned for Phoebe to sit. “The chair of honor goes to the birthday girl.”
Phoebe gave Deirdre a blinding smile before she climbed onto the seat and arranged the folds of her dress.
Kathleen had insisted on making Phoebe a special outfit, saying she could still sew with her right hand and it gave her good practice using her left one to assist. The bright blue fabric looked suspiciously like the gown Deirdre was wearing.
Everyone had gone out of their way to make this day special for his daughter, and Matthew had no idea how to show his appreciation for all they’d done.
Mrs. Harrison came in wheeling a cart containing the most amazing cake he’d ever seen. It had multiple layers covered with chocolate icing and what appeared to be swirls of roses, as well as five lit candles.
Phoebe’s eyes grew as round as the top layer of the cake.
The piano sounded, and everyone began to sing. Matthew blinked, vague memories stirring from one of his own birthdays when his mother had done something similar.
The cart stopped in front of his daughter.
Deirdre laid her hand on Phoebe’s shoulder. “Okay, sweetie, make a wish and blow out the candles.”
Phoebe nodded, taking the instructions very seriously it seemed.
Betsy grabbed her arm. “You can’t tell anyone or it won’t come true.”
Phoebe clapped a hand over her mouth and giggled. Then she blew until all the flames were extinguished.
Everyone clapped and hollered. Mrs. Harrison came forward. “I’ll cut the cake, and Miss Brianna will serve all the children who are seated quietly.”
Matthew marveled at the adults’ ability to control such a motley crowd. Though boisterous, the youngsters were remarkably obedient.
“From the expression on your face, Doctor, I assume you haven’t been to many birthday parties.”
Matthew looked up to see Deirdre grinning at him.
“Not really.”
She laid a hand on his shoulder, still smiling. Her enticing perfume enveloped him like a hug. She leaned down, and for one crazy moment, he thought she might kiss him. Instead, she whispered in his ear. “Do you have a gift for Phoebe?”
He stiffened on his chair. “I never thought of it.”
He made the mistake of turning his head and found wide green eyes much too close to his.
“Don’t you exchange birthday gifts?” The incredulous tone of her question made him feel like the worst sort of heel.
“It’s not a practice I’m accustomed to, no.” He didn’t tell her that after his mother died, there had been no more celebrations of any kind in his house.
Stark sympathy washed her features. She gave his shoulder a slight squeeze. “Don’t worry. You can share mine.”
Once they had partaken of the most delicious chocolate cream cake Matthew had ever sampled, the children came forward with small wrapped packages. It appeared each child had chosen one of their own toys to share with Phoebe. She opened every one with equal glee.
Kathleen wheeled her chair closer to Phoebe. “I know I said your dress was my present,” she told her, “but I have another little something as well.”
She handed Phoebe a book. Phoebe flipped open the pages and Matthew made out some colorful illustrations.
“It’s a picture Bible. It used to belong to my son . . . before he died. I thought you might like it.” Kathleen’s sad smile matched the sheen of tears in her eyes.
Matthew sprang to his feet. “Kathleen, this is too generous. Are you sure you don’t want to keep it?” He knew how much her son had meant to her, and how much this Bible must mean as well.
She smiled at him. “I’d rather someone enjoy the stories as much as Daniel used to.”
As though sensing the enormity of the gift, Phoebe came forward to hug Kathleen. “Thank you, Mrs. O’Leary. I like it very much.”
“You’re most welcome, sweetie.”
The women around him dabbed hankies to their faces. Even James appeared moved.
Deirdre turned to pick up a large hat box with a bow on top. “Happy birthday, Phoebe. This is from your daddy . . . with a little help from me.” She winked and handed the gift to his daughter, now back in her special seat.
Phoebe looked up in awe. “It’s very big.”
Deirdre laughed. “Go ahead and open it.”
Carefully, Phoebe removed the lid and pulled out a doll with blond curls. Phoebe’s mouth fell open, and then she gasped. Clutching the gift to her chest, she jumped from the chair and threw herself at Matthew. “Thank you, Papa. I’ve always wanted a doll like this.”
Matthew froze for a second, then bent to kiss the top of her head. “You’re welcome. But you should really thank Miss Deirdre. It was her idea.”
Deirdre knelt beside Phoebe and fingered the doll’s curls. “She used to be mine when I was your age. I hope you love her as much as I did.”
Phoebe wrapped her arms around Deirdre’s neck. “I do. Thank you, Miss Deirdre.”
The two clung together for a second, then Deirdre kissed Phoebe’s cheek. Blinking, she rose. “Well now, how about we ask Aunt Maggie to play the piano for us and we can sing some songs?”
A loud chorus of cheers went up, and the children scrambled to find positions near the piano.
When the rousing voices raised the volume level of the room to near blistering, Matthew came up behind Deirdre and touched her elbow. “Join me outside for a moment?”
She raised a brow in question but nodded and followed him out into the hallway. In search of privacy, he led her to the therapy room and flicked on the lights.
“Is everything all right?” Concern shadowed her frank gaze.
He smiled. “Everything is perfect—thanks to you.”
A blush spread over her cheeks. “It wasn’t only me.”
“You came up with the idea of a party and arranged all the details—down to the perfect gift for Phoebe.” He moved closer. “I’ve never seen my daughter happier, and I have you to thank for it.” For the first time, he truly understood what Phoebe had been missing by living such a sheltered existence.
Deirdre’s eyes reflected the glow from the overhead lights. “I was happy to do it. She is such a special girl, Matthew. All she needs is a little love and attention to truly blossom.”
Matthew swallowed a giant lump in his throat. This woman had enriched his relationship with his daughter in ways he could never express.
“Promise me something,” she said, her expression earnest. “Promise you’ll try to find Phoebe a mother who will love her.”
A dagger of pain pierced his heart. “You know my views on marriage.”
“Then promise you’ll find a new nanny for Phoebe. One who will love her and not stifle her like Miss Shearing.”
“Actually, I’m planning on replacing Miss Shearing as soon as I get home.”
She tilted her head. “You are?”
“Yes. It became apparent that she’s quite unsuitable.” In more ways than one. He sighed. “If only you would take the job.”
“What?”
Heat blasted up his neck. Had he said that aloud? “It’s just that you’re so good with Phoebe, and she adores you. But I know you have plans for your future.”
A soft sigh escaped Deirdre’s lips. “The good of the one versus the good of the many.”
“I beg your pardon?”
“Something you said to me back in Toronto, about abandoning your patients for one stroke victim. I understand now what you meant.” She pushed a strand of hair behind her ear. “Though I’d love to dedicate myself to Phoebe, I can help so many more children by becoming a pediatrician.” She gave a weak smile. “I know you’ll find the right woman to help raise your daughter, Matthew. I’ll keep you and Phoebe in my prayers. Always.”
Matthew’s chest muscles tightened to the point of pain. Of course she couldn’t waste her talents as a mere nanny. “Thank you, Deirdre, for everything.”
He bent to kiss her cheek. She turned her face, and his breath clogged in his lungs. The irresistible urge to pull her closer and taste her lips again swept through him. But he held himself firm, knowing it wouldn’t be fair. Wouldn’t be right.
They stared into each other’s eyes for several seconds, until a wave of sadness overpowered him and, with great reluctance, he stepped back. “I’d better see how the birthday girl is faring.”
As he left the room, he tried to brush aside the foolish notion that Deirdre could ever join their family. Clearly she wanted no part of such a future, and Matthew could not in good conscience ask her to sacrifice her dreams for his daughter.
He’d have to trust God to help him find the right person for Phoebe.
Engulfed in his thoughts, he didn’t see the housekeeper emerge from James’s study and almost walked right into her.
“Excuse me, Mrs. Johnston. I wasn’t paying attention.”
“Dr. Clayborne, I was about to come and find you.” Confusion etched the older woman’s face. “There’s someone on the telephone asking for Miss Phoebe.”
Matthew went completely still. “Did they give their name?”
“A Mrs. Pentergast.”
Matthew’s stomach dropped to his shoes. His in-laws were supposed to be in England. How had they found out Phoebe was here? “Thank you, Mrs. Johnston. I will handle this.”
With grim determination, he entered the study and closed the door.