Holding on to the fun memories from their time in Victoria, Lily hugged Kevin, not wanting to release him, but knowing she had to let him get into the shuttle. No matter the knot in her stomach and everything in her body screaming at her to hang onto him, she had to let him get on a plane and fly across the country today. It had been a wonderful visit, but like all of them, much too short. Watching him go, brought back all the doubts she had about moving so far away. Her heart ached as she watched her sweet son slide into a seat and wave goodbye.
He couldn’t hide his excitement at getting to see Brooke and she would never deny him the chance of finding someone special. She waved to him until the van disappeared, tears streaming down her face. If she had stayed in Richmond, he’d still be going to New Hampshire, so that wouldn’t have changed today. She reminded herself, the only difference would have been the geography, making for a shorter distance to see each other.
Mothers never knew if their decisions were the right ones; they just had to do the best they could and hope their choices wouldn’t scar their children. She had trusted in all the prayers she had uttered and the signs, including the bequest from Uncle Leo that led her to Driftwood Bay. If she had stayed in Richmond, she would still be miserable, trudging along, surrounded by memories of all she had lost. She would have never met Mac or Cyndy or Bodie or Andy…or Mel. Thinking of them comforted her and made her realize she had made the right choice, but it didn’t soothe the pang in her heart that came with Kevin’s absence.
She got back in the car, where the dogs were anxious to greet her, sensing her sadness. She detoured to get a hot tea and then stopped by the park so the dogs could get some exercise. Tomorrow was New Year’s Eve and she had to shake off this funk so she could enjoy the festivities with Mac. It wasn’t fair to him for her to be down in the dumps.
With Christmas over, she had expected to hear from Wendy and made a mental note to call her in the afternoon if she hadn’t gotten in touch. Lily had run into Poppy at the market a couple of days ago. With the tea shop cutting back to their normal winter hours and Poppy not offering to extend Wendy’s employment, she’d have to find something else. That wouldn’t be easy during the off-season.
She cleared her mind, determined to focus on the dogs and nature. There was no point in putting too much effort or concern into what Wendy would do. She hated seeing her sister suffer, but had learned long ago that Wendy would do what she wanted, with or without her input. As she wandered the pathways with the dogs, she avoided focusing on Kevin flying. It never failed to fill her with dread, her mind always happy to play worst case scenario with her. Losing her mom had only amplified her own tendencies to anticipate the worst. That trait served her well in law enforcement, but was a drag in real life.
Instead, she focused on the wonderful few days they had enjoyed in Victoria. Along with all the gorgeous decorations and millions of festive lights gracing the domes and outlining the massive buildings, plus the private tour she had arranged of the Parliament Building and the fun horse and carriage ride they had enjoyed, Mac had driven them to Butchart Gardens. Instead of the gorgeous flowers they were famous for, during the holiday season they wowed their guests with light displays throughout the fifty acres. Even Kevin was impressed with the stunning effect. She had taken hundreds of photos and couldn’t wait to visit in the spring or summer when the flowers would dominate.
After several loops around the park, she led the dogs back to the car and home. She took refuge at her work table, sorting and finding pieces of glass for a new project. She had ordered a round mirror from the mercantile and had been rifling through her aunt’s collection of glass to make a border around it, starting with shades of brown and sandy tones around the bottom and then gradually changing the colors from lighter aqua to a deep blue. It was a challenge, but a welcome distraction for the winter.
As she had worked on the pieces for Mac and Mel, it struck her that much like her own life, she was taking bits of broken pieces of glass and putting them together to make something new, something beautiful. While the pieces would never resemble what they used to be, they were transformed into something different, something that would bring joy and happiness to her life. All those broken shapes, smoothed by the power of the sea, were essential and would live on in her new creations. Maybe it was the same way with her memories. She’d never have exactly what she had lost, but she could have something new and wonderful.
Mel was at work and the house was quiet, save for the sound of the dogs snoring and the scrape of glass against the plastic trays. Lily stretched her shoulders and back and made her way upstairs for a late lunch break. She couldn’t resist taking her snack and a cup of cocoa into the living room to enjoy the tree while she ate. Kevin wouldn’t be here to help her take it down this year. The days after Christmas were always filled with melancholy, but without Kevin it would be worse.
She felt hot breath on her leg and the weight of Fritz leaning against it reminded her she wasn’t alone. His soulful eyes were full of love and understanding. She reached out to pet the top of his head. “You’re a good boy, Fritzie.” He rested his head on her thigh, relishing the attention.
Her phone buzzed and she almost toppled her mug, reaching for it. Kevin had landed in Chicago and had a short layover before the final leg to Manchester. She let herself relax a bit, knowing the longest part of his travel was over. Once he took off, it was just over two hours to New Hampshire. He would be there by her dinner time.
She texted him a reply, reminding him to drink lots of water and to send her photos of the mountains. She finished her lunch and sunk back into her recliner, covering herself with her blanket and petting the dogs until they stretched out next to her. Her finger hovered over Wendy’s name on the screen of her phone. The last week had been nice, without the tension between the two of them. She wished they had a better connection, one that made it easy to be together. One like Mac and Cyndy had. Regardless, she had made up her mind to do the right thing, which meant making sure Wendy knew she could stay with her, as long as it took to get on her feet. She just hoped that wouldn’t mean forever.
She hit the green button and after several rings, Wendy’s voice greeted her. “Hey, how are you doing?” asked Lily. “Any news?”
“I was going to call you. I’ve just been swamped.”
Lily’s eyebrows rose. “Really, what have you been doing? Did you get to see Chad?”
“Oh, yes. George set up a couple of visits, so that was good and Chad had asked George to talk to Constance, so that helped. She’s agreed to let me stay in her guest house until Chad’s trial is over. It’s not ideal, but I can’t handle living out there in the backwoods with no conveniences, forced to do some menial job. I honestly don’t know how you do it, Lily. I don’t think I could survive and told Chad that.”
Her tone and words stung, but Lily focused on the silver lining. “I’m sure you’ll be happier there, closer to Chad, and George can keep you more informed.”
“And I don’t have to get a job. Constance promised to cover everything while I’m here, so I can just relax. She’s got a pool and she lives in a different area, so I don’t have to face all our friends.”
Lily could only imagine what she would do if Chad ended up in prison, but the trial wouldn’t be happening anytime soon. “I’m glad things are looking up for you, Wendy. I hope you had a nice Christmas.”
“Oh, it was wonderful. Constance treated me to a shopping spree and she had a lovely catered affair. She also has one of those blenders I wanted and someone does her shopping and food prep, so it’s so much less stressful. I finally feel like I have my life back.”
Lily’s eyes rested on the stocking and packages Wendy had left behind, still under the tree waiting for her; one from her and one from Mel. It was hard to fathom how someone raised by parents like hers could be so heartless and self-absorbed. It had crushed Mel when Wendy left so abruptly and didn’t even bother to take the gifts Mel had taken the time to get her. Without any prompting, she had spent her own money on a smoothie recipe book, luxurious foot cream, and fluffy socks.
Lily shook her head as she contemplated sending the gifts to her or just returning them. She doubted Wendy would take the time to acknowledge them, which would be worse for Mel than returning them. She might as well get her money back or enjoy some of the items herself.
“Sounds like it’s perfect for you.” Lily rolled her eyes at Fritz and Bodie. “You do know you left your gifts from me and Mel behind?” She couldn’t resist the jab.
“Oh, that’s right. I was in such a rush to leave I didn’t even think about it. Tell her I’m sorry. I’ll send you guys something.”
“There’s no need to send us anything, Wendy. Mel used her own money, which she has very little of, to buy you some things she thought you would like. It’s a shame you can’t be a bit more thoughtful.”
Wendy groaned. “I don’t need a lecture right now. My life is in shambles if you haven’t noticed. I’m worried about what’s going to happen to me, so pardon me if I don’t have time to coddle the poor little homeless girl you’ve taken in.”
Lily’s heart pounded in her chest as her temples throbbed and her blood boiled. “Mel is a wonderful young woman who has had to overcome more than you or I will ever know. You belittling her only highlights your own character flaws, not hers. I’m glad you’ve found a solution to your problem, since I was going to let you know you were welcome to stay here as long as you need. Welcome may be too strong of a word, but I would never let you go without a place to stay. I truly hope things work out for you and Chad.”
Lily took a deep breath. “You know, Wendy, Mom would be so hurt knowing how distant we’ve become. Family was always so important to her and Dad and I hate the fact that we’ve grown apart and no longer have a close connection. We’re lucky to have each other and I don’t want to look back on our relationship with regret. Don’t you think Mom would be sad to know we don’t even talk much?”
“I just think we’re very different people. I don’t think about Mom that much and I think we just lead such separate lives, I’m not sure we have much in common any more. Maybe we never really did.”
Lily’s shoulders slumped at her sister’s words.
Garbled sounds in the background competed with Wendy’s voice. “I’ve got to go. We’re heading out now. Constance is hosting a New Year’s Eve party tomorrow and we need to pick up a few things. I’ll call you later.” She disconnected before Lily could say goodbye.
She let out a long breath and then took in another, hoping to calm her racing heart. Typical Wendy. More concerned about parties and her luxurious lifestyle than anyone with real problems. She knew one thing—she wouldn’t be sending Wendy any of her gifts.
Why did it have to be so hard? Lily had never had many close friends, perhaps because it was often too much work, too much drama, and she craved calmness. Wendy was right that they live opposite lives and she couldn’t force her sister to have a relationship. She wished they could have a closer one, one where they could tell each other things and rely on one another, but it took two people to build such a connection. Just because they were related didn’t mean it would happen.
Her heart felt heavy, knowing someday Wendy would regret her focus on money and extravagance rather than family. It made her sad to know Wendy didn’t think of their mother often. Maybe it was too hard. Although deflated, Lily knew she would never turn her back on Wendy, but she wasn’t going to subject herself to the constant rudeness and rejection. She’d always be there for her, but Wendy had to live her own life and maybe someday she would understand the value of family.
Lily glanced at the garbage and remembered she needed to take the trash can out to the curb. She started to collect it and then stopped, opened the freezer and took out Wendy’s blasted fish and tossed it into the bag, before gathering it up and taking it outside. She took great delight, maybe a little too much, in heaving that bag with the frozen fish into the green container and shoving it to the curb.
With that chore done, Lily padded into the kitchen, filled the kettle and set about brewing a cup of tea. The ritual calmed her, centered her, and she understood why all the characters in her favorite British shows sipped tea during a crisis.
Mel was working the late shift and once Lily heard from Kevin, who had arrived in New Hampshire and was waiting at baggage claim with Brooke and her family, she relaxed and went back to working on the mosaic. She had been at it for more than an hour when Fritz and Bodie dashed up the stairs and moments later the doorbell rang.
She put the sheet over the table and hurried upstairs, surprised to find Mac and Sherlock at the front door. He held up takeout bags from Noni’s. “I figured you could use a little pick me up tonight.”
Sherlock darted by her as she rushed into his arms. She swallowed hard, trying to control the sobs that threatened to rise from her throat. “I’m so glad to see you,” she whispered.
He put an arm around her, still holding the bags in his other hand. “Let’s go inside and we’ll figure out what’s wrong.”
She leaned against his arm as they walked through the door. The dogs huddled together near the tree, watching them as they passed by to the kitchen. He plopped the bags on the counter and took her in his arms. “Is Kevin okay?”
She nodded, murmuring into his shoulder. “He’s fine. He got there and is with Brooke and her family.”
“Oh, that’s good. It’s not easy, letting them go.”
She cleared her throat. “It’s partly that and then I made the mistake of calling Wendy. She was a beast.” As she talked and told him about their conversation, she pulled out plates from the cupboard.
He grimaced as he added pasta to his plate and uncovered the garlic bread. “It might be a blessing in disguise, you know? I could tell how much she stressed you out when she was here. I’m not sure it would get any better.”
“My head agrees with you. I’m just trying to wait for my heart to catch up. I’ve been spending too much time thinking about her, about our parents, what they would think. Having Kevin here helped mask all the sadness I always feel this time of year. Talking to Wendy brought it to the surface and it bubbled over.”
“It’s going to be okay. I promise.” He reached for her hand and squeezed it.”
She nodded and made an effort to smile. “I’m just wallowing. I’ll be fine. I just feel like I’ve lost the last bit of my family I had left. After my parents died, it was the three of us for so long and I put all my hope in our tight circle. Gary and Kevin shielded me from the unending sorrow of that time in my life. Then, when Gary was killed, I honestly wasn’t sure I’d make it. If not for Kevin, I would have given up.”
His caring eyes filled with tears, as he rubbed a thumb across the top of her hand. She licked her lips. “I know I’m not telling you anything you haven’t experienced first-hand. The pain is so powerful, it’s like a paralytic agent. Coming here, meeting you, taking in Bodie and Mel, changed all that. It gave me a glimmer of hope, a possibility of a new future, a purpose, you might say.”
He nodded and smiled. “I feel the same way about meeting you. I was on the hamster wheel, running and running, focused on work so I didn’t have to think about my life, being alone, Missy, all of it. But then I met a beautiful woman in my exam room, along with her loyal golden, and in a split second, my life changed. I think Fritz and Bodie knew what they were doing when they brought us together.” He brought her hand to his lips and kissed each of her knuckles.
“I’m so lucky to have you in my life.” Lily leaned against his shoulder. “Thank you for making me feel better about everything. Sometimes I spend too much time in my own head.”
He chuckled. “I know the feeling.” He pushed the container of pasta toward her. “Let’s eat and then maybe we can talk Mel into making us some hot cocoa when she gets home.”