| PROGRAMMING PARTNER: 30TH GENE KEY | PHYSIOLOGY: SACRAL PLEXUS |
| CODON RING: THE RING OF UNION (4, 7, 29, 59) |
AMINO ACID: VALINE |
The 29th Shadow of Half-Heartedness in combination with its programming partner, the 30th Shadow of Desire, creates quite possibly the greatest emotional chaos of any two of the Shadow pairings. This is a deep and ancient genetic programming within human beings. More than anything it concerns a basic lack of trust in human desire. Desire, as we can learn from the 30th Shadow and its Gift of Lightness, serves a greater purpose than simply creating emotional confusion. Desire that is fully embraced always leads to a beneficial outcome. It is after all a pure life energy within us. The problems with desire arise through the 29th Shadow and its dynamics. In essence this Shadow is about two things that ultimately stem from the same source — over-commitment and lack of commitment.
The secret to all commitment lies in the way in which you begin. It is the energy behind your actions that creates your future rather than the actions themselves. There is nothing that is worth doing in life unless it is done with absolute commitment. It doesn’t matter whether you love it or hate it, if you attempt anything half-heartedly you might as well not attempt it at all. Without commitment, action lacks power or direction and above all, it lacks luck. This last comment may sound rather odd, but there exists a universal law that anything that is done with full commitment carries within it the seed of good fortune. Likewise, anything done without full commitment carries the seed of misfortune. All life is a continuum and every action you take leads you down a certain path. It must also be said that there is no morality behind this universal law of commitment. It simply represents an invitation for you to trust in life.
Half-heartedness robs you of your opportunity to participate in life’s mystery. It stalls life’s natural tendency towards the magical and the profound. This Shadow keeps you a victim of fate rather than being a player in the great play. It keeps you in the sidelines, ensuring that you play roles in life that are dull and monotonous or else fraught with emotional agony. In a nutshell, when you enter into something half-heartedly you invite misery into your life. This 29th Gene Key is about human feelings. It’s about sex and relating, failure and success, desire and expectation. No matter who you are, your life depends upon your honouring the laws of this Gene Key. When you do something half-heartedly you are actually behaving dishonestly. You may not be literally dishonest with others, but you are being dishonest with yourself and with life and this always has unpleasant consequences.
The 29th Shadow is a wake-up call to all human beings. How clearly you hear the message depends on how deeply asleep you are. Commitment operates within a cycle and at the end of its cycle it either automatically renews itself or it lets go and commits to something else. These cycles can be of many different lengths. The cellular cycle lasts for seven full years, since that is how long it takes the body to replace all of its renewable cells. True commitment within a cycle of time therefore lasts seven years or more. Cycles of desire can last much less time, but each has its own built-in timing mechanism. Human beings must work through their desire cycles until they reach a natural completion. Unfortunately there is no simple way to know when something will end. You need to remain committed until the play has ended of its own accord. If you break out of a cycle prematurely your life will reconstruct the same patterns of experience until you actually finish the cycle and learn the lessons it holds for you.
The 29th Shadow keeps most human beings in repeating patterns because they do not follow things through to their natural endings. True commitment includes the energy to overcome obstacles and adversity. Half-heartedness is about giving up at the first sign of trouble or discomfort and, ultimately, all half-heartedness is rooted in deep un-embraced fear. The lesson that comes from the 29th Shadow is really simple. If you quit something too soon you will stay in the same old loop, but if you follow experiences through to the end you will make quantum leaps, both in terms of your good fortune and your fulfilment. You need to see that this Shadow, like all the Shadows, has a beneficial purpose in the long run. It teaches you the value of your experiences when you look back upon them with hindsight. If you look back and keep seeing the same old emotional traumas repeating in your life, you will eventually learn what you are doing or not doing that is causing these patterns.
The ancient Chinese had a wonderful and somewhat disturbing name for this 29th Gene Key or hexagram. They called it The Abysmal and it was considered one of the major symbols for predicting danger on life’s path. This is exactly what the 29th Shadow does — it keeps throwing you into very challenging situations in which your commitment is tested. Once you have embarked on a certain path in life, you are really flying blind. You have only the power of your commitment to carry you through the abyss. With half-heartedness, you are constantly concerned about where this path will take you and whether you have made the right decision in the first place. Your fears heckle you from within and threaten to undermine your commitment. If you yield to them, you actually create the conditions for misfortune. But if you can weather your doubts, especially at those critical moments, then you create the conditions for transcendence.
In this 29th Shadow lies the secret of what is generally seen as success. Success in life hinges upon two things — commitment and luck. Commitment actually engenders luck. Failure means that you have remained stuck in the same old cycle, and nowhere does this Shadow have more relevance than in the field of human relationships. Since it is paired with the 30th Shadow of Desire, it leads to the beginning of many human bonds and alliances. It is through this coupling that so much confusion enters into relationships. All desire operates within clear cycles and these cycles must be honoured, even if they are not fulfilled. If a desire is honestly embraced, then its cycle will soon reveal itself. It may last a day or a year, but the cycle can never be wrong. This is not about social morality but life energy. In marriages (whether formalised or internal), commitment is a built-in requirement. If sexual desire for another rears its head, it signals one of two things — either the marriage is nearing the end of its cycle of commitment, or it is about to be strengthened through an honest cooperative grappling with the desire cycle and whatever that entails. The 29th Shadow responds to most sexual desire out of fear, which usually manifests as behaviour rooted in either guilt or shame. In this sense, half-heartedness means to hide your true feelings or follow them through in secret. Thus this 29th Shadow can lead to all manner of unfortunate emotional situations and relationship disasters in life.
As the old folk saying goes, “A life lived in fear is a life half-lived.” It is an apt saying for this 29th Shadow, which can cause all kinds of emotional trauma for human beings, especially in the domain of relationships and material success. To live half-heartedly means that you never fully embrace and trust your decisions. This Shadow makes you constantly worry about your decisions and where they might or might not lead you. The great illusion of failure and success is that they are simply inner attitudes linked to your beliefs about yourself. To move beyond the domain of this 29th Shadow you will have to let go of all such ideas and allow life to catapult you into and through the abyss of the unknown. You must hold back nothing and be totally honest, both with yourself and others. There are so many rewards and fruits waiting for you if you can stand by your decisions and follow them through to their natural, organic conclusion.
These people are conditioned not only to make commitments but also to keep them no matter what happens. In other words, these people are unable or unwilling to recognise when natural cycles are over. Such a nature takes on far more than it is capable of handling and then becomes gradually exhausted by the magnitude of its commitments. These people often become victims of others, or they become slaves of large organisations. Because of the fear in their nature they do not have the courage to admit when something needs to end and they continue to allow others to abuse them, either consciously or unconsciously.
When the 29th Shadow is played out through a reactive nature, it hides a deep fear of commitment that is seen by others as a lack of reliability. When one does something without true commitment, then one can rarely follow through an action or a cycle with confidence and competence. The usual result is the breaking off of the cycle and a consequent disappointment and sense of failure or shame. These are natures that may say yes to all kinds of things but then react to the pressure by pulling out of their commitments. The anger inherent within their nature is usually triggered by someone else’s expectation of them, and thus they tend to talk things up whilst lacking the ability to deliver on their promises.
As your frequency becomes clearer and more refined, your decision-making process naturally becomes cleaner and quicker as well. The 29th Gift is not subject to the pressures of conditioning and expectation from others, but opens into a deep connection to the direction of the life force within. This Gift inherently attunes to the cyclic flow of life. People with the 29th Gift have the knack of getting out of the way of life, and through this Gift they can watch their lives unwinding in powerful and mythical ways. Without the 29th Gift and its ability to make crystal clear commitments, life becomes choked and confused, and nowhere is this truer than at the emotional and sexual level.
Commitment is akin to trust, which can neither be forced nor willed. It flows like a great river from deep within your being and out into your actions. With commitment you have no need to think about the future or the goal because the commitment contains the seed of the goal within it. Only time will show where the river of each cycle of experience will lead. Thus for the 29th Gift the goal is not what is important. What really matters is the commitment to keep following the journey until its end. Life is latticed with cycles within cycles — some journeys last five minutes and some last a lifetime. The ultimate journey is your entire life, and the shape of your life is formed by the millions of tiny decisions that are made over the course of your life. To live your entire life with this profound level of commitment means to make every decision with the same commitment — from the way you have sex to the way you wash the dishes!
As an integral part of a chemical family known as the Ring of Union, the 29th Gift shares a common theme with the 4th, 7th and 59th Gene Keys. This Codon Ring is currently undergoing a great deal of spontaneous mutation in our DNA and is directly responsible for a huge shift in the way in which we humans relate, particularly through our sexuality and gender. Much of the impetus for these genetic changes is coming through the 59th Gene Key and its programming partner the 55th Gene Key. The very role of human sexuality is about to change, which means that at present the world is deeply confused about the value of its morality and its age-old institutions such as marriage. Through the 29th Gift we can experience a new definition of the word commitment, which has less to do with social expectations and everything to do with saying yews to life. The only real commitment is commitment to your own inner guidance in the now (the 7th Gift). Finding this guidance is dependent on your surrendering to the life force within you, which involves utter trust in life’s natural cycles of commitment. It is this trust that is moving into the world today, and as it comes it is smashing apart all our false moralities.
True commitment is an energetic dynamic felt within your whole being rather than a social requirement. Many people view commitment through morality. You see this particularly in human relationships, where commitment is generally enforced by social pressure. If, for example, a relationship breaks up or a marriage ends in divorce, it is still often thought of as a failure. True commitment is not moralistic. It lasts as long as it lasts. When the cycle is over, it is over, and both parties will feel this at the same time. Anyone who begins a relationship alliance out of true commitment knows this truth. Relationships that begin with this kind of clean commitment generally end in a clean way, without all the usual emotional turbulence that goes with breaking up. Some relationship commitment cycles really do last for one night, and others forever. The length of the cycle has nothing to do with success or failure. At the frequency level of the 29th Gift, all relationships form a part of the evolving storyline of your life, and thus they are appreciated for adding richness and depth to life rather than being seen in terms of failure or success.
People with the 29th Gift in their hologenetic profile can be exceedingly lucky people. Their clear, committed decisions create the conditions for their own good fortune. These people cannot afford to be led by others — they cannot listen to teachers, gurus, oracles or systems. Neither can they succumb to pressure or expectation from others. Their decisions flow from deep within their bellies and brook no argument. With the 29th Gift, a clear decision is felt as a quiet and powerful warmth that courses through your whole being. These are not emotional decisions, neither are they excited or nervous or explosive. Commitment is a wholesome energy, as though nature itself were taking control of your destiny and showing you the way ahead. It is at this stage that you begin to understand that to commit is also to surrender. Rather than expending a huge effort to maintain your commitment, you simply surrender yourself to it. Sometimes if you feel a lack of commitment, it is because you need to surrender even more deeply into your process.
Whether you have the 29th Gene Key as an aspect of your hologenetic profile or not, luck is made or unmade here, every time you make a clear decision in life. This can be especially true in business. Like a microcosm of life, a business is a journey with ups and downs. Prosperity is directly linked to clear commitment — both in your relationships and in your daily work. Within business there are many cycles that begin, end and begin again. Financial success cannot be measured by a single cycle, but by continued commitment and certainty in your decision-making. For example, sometimes when you stay committed to a direction that seems to be unsuccessful, it opens into opportunities that later become successful. You cannot think your way through life. You can only align your inner direction truly, trust in it come what may, and allow nature to do the rest. That’s the pure magic of the 29th Gift.
When the Gift of Commitment takes on a universal level of functioning, it becomes transmuted into the Siddhi of Devotion. Out of this consciousness all the great paths known in the East as Bhakti Yoga have arisen. Bhakti Yoga refers to the path of devotion, or the path of the heart. Devotional paths are all paths of self-surrender in which you completely lose your own sense of self in another. The other can be a mission, as in the case of Mother Teresa’s devotion to the poor, or the other can be an ideal or symbol such as a god or a guru. The path of devotion is far removed from society. Devotion is commitment gone mad. It is mad in the sense that you have to leave the order of your mind to enter into the wildness of your heart.
At the Gift level, commitment can still have traces of selfishness even though it is surrendered and contains great power. However, the more the frequency rises through this 29th Gene Key, the more you find your commitments directed towards the service of others. As the frequency gets higher and higher, your commitment takes on a devotional quality and begins to activate the heart centre. At a certain stage in this process, you cannot help but become a devotee of some higher cause or being, and yet still the process goes on. As the energy of love pours outward into service, it requires you to surrender your very identity to what appears to be an outside being or symbol. To those who do not understand the true matters of the heart, such devotion appears misguided at best. People approaching this Siddhi can appear to worship gurus or idols without a care for themselves. To the devoted one however, the only thing that exists is the object of their devotion. If the devotional energy is towards a guru, then the guru is seen everywhere and in every thing. If it is towards a mission, then that mission is all that matters in your life and everything else must bend in that single-pointed direction.
When the quantum leap from the 29th Gift into the 29th Siddhi occurs, an extraordinary thing happens. All the love that has been poured into the object of devotion suddenly begins pouring back into the devoted one from everything in their universe. At this point, the one manifesting the Siddhi often refers to everything, including themselves, as the Beloved. Thus it is said by such people that the very rocks and the trees bleed their love towards the beloved. Wherever such people go, their heart is in constant meltdown from everything and everyone they meet. These people often become poets or divine drunks or servers of others. The programming partner to this Siddhi is the 30th Siddhi of Rapture, and these two words — devotion and rapture — are inseparable. These people are literally seized by love. The aura of such a being is so soft that it can draw in almost anyone as a devotee. When meeting this frequency in the flesh, it is near-impossible to say no to such a being.
Another aspect concerning this Siddhi, and in fact one partially born out of this Siddhi is the path of tantra. Tantra loosely refers to the transmutation of sexual or dense frequency energy into Divine energy. Even at the Gift level of the 29th Gene Key you begin to enter the stream of tantra. As you allow the energy of commitment to act itself out in the world, you begin to realise that an energy separate from your body is moving through you. This high frequency energy is actually moving into your body from your higher bodies and in particular from the 5th body known as the Buddhic body. The more refined your frequency becomes, the more you can sense this energy or vitality moving through you. At these higher levels, people often become interested in practices such as yoga that can help you become even more sensitised to these life currents within the body. When the life currents begin to move through the chambers of your chest and heart, the devotional energy is activated. This is the essence of tantra — the spontaneous surrender of your being to its higher evolution.
This 29th Siddhi remains deeply immersed in human relationships. In many tantric practises, the devotee visualises him or herself having sex with a Divine consort, or he or she experiences alchemical shifts within their body through sustained loving intercourse with another person. As a path opposite to that of yoga, which is based upon discipline, tantra is about letting life take you wherever it wants to. Such paths draw a great deal of moral judgement from society because they are essentially amoral and given the nature of the sexual energy inherent in this Gene Key, taboos are often broken. However, if such paths are followed through with absolute commitment, they do eventually raise the consciousness into its devotional aspect. As you may recall, the ancient Chinese referred to this archetype as The Abysmal. There is no greater symbol for diving into the abyss than that of living your life entirely from your heart.
The path of devotion is one of the simplest ways of touching the Divine and is why you find it in so many of the great religions. Here it is based on the notion of sacred relationship and its method is worship and prayer. There is a certain safety in worship because there always remains a worshipper and an object of worship. However, between the realm of the Gifts and the realm of the Siddhis lies the great abyss. It is this abyss that brings an end to worship. The great challenge for the devotee is to allow him or herself to be annihilated and take the great leap into full embodiment. When the devotee crosses the abyss, he or she will never emerge on the other side. Only the Divine will remain. This is the dilemma of the siddhic realm — once such a person speaks, they will always sound as though they are God talking, rather than a humble worshipper of God. This is where most religions end. Once the 29th Siddhi comes into being, all life is witnessed as prayerful so there is no sense in praying anymore. Since you are the embodiment of the Divine, to whom will you now pray?
The 29th Siddhi of Devotion is an absolutely contagious Siddhi. Wherever it goes it inspires devotion in others. This electrical, almost sexual aura creates considerable waves when it appears in the world. These are masters who care nothing for morality or taboos. They are only interested in one thing — surrender into the heart. When it first pours into you, this 29th Siddhi often appears to be a chaotic energy without structure or rhythm. As your devotion deepens you adjust your inner being to the organic nature of the heart, which knows no rules and takes its own strange twists and turns. What appears to be chaos to the outsider is really a deep state of wild, harmonic transcendence in which the boundaries of normal reality have utterly melted. This is the Siddhi of saying yes to life — it gives itself to absolutely anything or anyone that comes its way. The message of the 29th Siddhi is exactly this — trust your heart above all else, and never worry about the consequences. To be devoted means to lie forever in the lap of the Divine.