All the contemplating and soul-searching on my own was really getting me nowhere. By the time I got home, I was more conflicted than I was when I first considered going into business for myself. Luckily for me, being home meant being able to seek the opinion of my guiding star. My Millie will surely put everything into perspective for me. I have no doubts that she will make me see the answer that is right in front of my face. Not only did she always seem to know what I wanted to hear but she made sure to tell me what I needed to hear.
I have always loved the fact that Millie makes it a point to be home when I get home from work. Being able to kiss her and hear her ask “how was my day” was the highlight of my day, and it made a bad day better and a good day great. We both enjoyed sharing the details of our day, and it never failed that one of us either had some funny incident or hostile run in that we knew the other would understand like no other. If it was something comedic that happened, we would laugh at or with each other depending on the circumstances. I guess because we knew each other so well it was like being there because we knew how the other would behave in almost any situation. If it was something hostile or confrontational, we would exchange ideas of how we would have handled it or talk about what to do the next time we see the person. We fed off each other’s input and feedback, primarily because we respected the each other’s opinion, but there was something even deeper than that that made our conversations and our bond special. Something about our connection was like we were married to the opposite sex version of ourselves. It was a thing of sheer beauty. Even if we didn’t completely agree on something, we fully understood the other person’s perspective and respected their point of view. I must say that of all the things that caused me to fall in love with my wife, this was without question at the top of the list.
Millie was coming from Elijah’s room, so I assumed she was just putting him down for the night. I hate that I missed the little monster, but I will pray over him before I bed down for the night. Right now I really need Millie to be able to focus because this decision is one of the biggest ones yet.
“Hello, my handsome husband,” she greeted me with a kiss as she wrapped her arms around my neck.
“Lamb,” I said in response, and as a signal that I knew she would read.
“Oh no, I know what that means. I thought you looked like you had something on your mind as soon as I saw your face.”
“You know me so well” was the only response I could muster as confirmation.
“I don’t know what it is, but it seems to be serious. Is everything all right?”
“I guess I will start with a little bit of a confession. I have been thinking about the end of my contract with JW is coming up, and to be honest with you, I was considering staying on if he would have me. It’s just that I dread the idea of a life of boredom with only the responsibilities in Asante to keep me occupied.”
“Wow! That is some confession. I thought Asante was your dream? I mean it was all of our dream. But you did say “was” considering, so I guess there is more to your story.”
“Well, yeah, I saw Martin Baldwin today and he said to give you his love, but he also offered me a job to go into business with him as a partner.”
“That’s great news! Martin is a good friend and that sounds like an exceptional opportunity. Yet you still seem to be holding something back. Is there more?”
“I turned him down.”
“Why? Sounds to me that he was offering you a way out of your presumed future of boredom.”
“Yes, baby, but like you said Asante is my dream, and although I believe that my responsibilities won’t be fulfilling enough, I still love what we have built and want to watch it grow. Accepting his offer would have taken me away from here and that isn’t what I want either.”
“So what do you want, Ben? I’m confused. What does all of this mean?”
“What it means is after Martin made his offer, he said one more thing that I haven’t been able to shake.”
“Are you going to share it with me or am I going to have to beat it out of you, Mr. Abbott?”
“A beating? Don’t threaten me with a good time,” I said, teasing her, but she was still focused on where all this was going and missed my attempt at flirting. “He suggested that I go into business for myself, get my own ranch.”
Millie didn’t respond immediately. She sat there in what I considered to be full contemplation mode. I really couldn’t read how she felt about the idea. What I was sure of was the fact that I was eager to hear anything she had to say.
“Sweetheart, you should have thought of this yourself. I think it is a fabulous idea. I am so excited at all of the possibilities. You will be around more for Elijah and of course for me.”
“I wasn’t sure how you would feel about me being around all the time. I guess you will have to tell your boyfriend it’s over.” This was just our way of teasing each other without having to always saying I love you. Millie laughed at me and just replied with an “umm hmm.”
We spent the next few hours discussing the details and possibilities. I filled her in on what Martin said about helping me in any way possible. In the years that Martin and I have been friends, she had always said he was a good man, so she wasn’t surprised at his offer and was certain that he was sincere. However, our conversation revealed something that I hadn’t really considered to be an issue, but like I knew, she would, Millie, put a different perspective on how JW may respond to me going into business for myself. She made me look at it from the aspect of stealing business away from him. Although I didn’t think he would be happy about me not working for him anymore, it didn’t even cross my mind that we would be in competition with each other. We both agreed that this could be a major problem. After truly dissecting the whole situation from his perspective, we figured JW would view it as the ultimate betrayal considering all the business we have done together. We were sure that he would take credit for all we have and what we are building in Asante.
My brothers came home shortly thereafter and shared their views about my business proposition. To my surprise, they were both elated about the possibilities. I figured Joshua to be excited about the whole thing because he has always enjoyed working by my sides. On the other hand, I wasn’t sure how Bear would take to the idea. He helped me understand that it wasn’t the work that he didn’t like, rather working for JW that made him decided not to stay on. He expressed to me how he would love to be a part of the business venture and would help out in any way I needed. I told him that we would just keep the spirit or bartering alive because I would come to him for all of the shoeing of my horses in return for any work he did on the ranch. I would also pay him for making saddles and also recommend his saddles to my customers.
The rest of the evening was intensely focused on what we all agreed would be the most difficult hurdle to cross. How JW would take the news was concerned for us all, and we tried to brainstorm the best way to deliver the news to him. Timing was everything, and Joshua came up with the logic that we had best be sure to have all of our affairs in order before we revealed our intentions to him. The fear was that if he took the news badly, he might attempt to sabotage our efforts and kill our business before we could even get it off the ground. Once we all agreed on the timing, we each took responsibility for getting certain resources or planning our business strategies.
When I went to bed that evening, I once again thanked the Lord for the family that I have. They are without question a tremendous asset as a support system. My heart swells at the fact that they always support my dreams and seamlessly share my visions. Once again, I sought to venture into unknown territory, and not only did they not hesitate to join me but they took responsibility for ensuring the success of our journey. I closed my eyes that night uncertain of my future but infinitely confident that no matter what the outcome I would go forward with the most important people in the world by my side.