Ash drives us back to the city in his regular car. I sit, silent in the passenger seat, thinking about the past. One question keeps nagging at me, and after thirty miles of uncomfortable silence, I let it out.
“Why didn’t you call?” I ask. “Back then, after grad school. I get that you didn’t want a relationship, but I was still your friend.”
Ash takes a deep breath. He stares straight ahead at the road, but I see a flicker of tension in his jaw.
“I wanted to,” he replies at last. “I didn’t plan to cut you off like that. But… Things just don’t always work out the way we plan.”
I wait.
“Life got complicated fast once I got back to England,” he tries to explain. “My father passed away before I had even unpacked my suitcases. Everyone fell apart. My younger brother was no use, he was off partying in the South of France. It was all down to me to get the estate in order and take over the company.”
I feel a surge of sympathy. “I’m sorry. I didn’t realize.”
“How could you?” Ash sighs. “The truth is, I wanted to call you. You were probably the only person who could have made me feel better about the whole mess.”
“So why didn’t you?” I venture. I’m still confused. “I would have been there for you if I’d known.”
He shakes his head. “I just wanted to block it all out. It was like you represented everything I’d lost when I had to take on the mantle as head of the family. My dad made such a mess of things. It took me a year to turn the company into what I wanted it to be, and then there was another mess that I had to take care of…” he stops, his face darkening. Then he shakes it away.
“The point is, JJ, I really wanted to call you. But by the time things settled down, and I could, it was too late.”
I catch my breath. He looks so sincere but I don’t know if I can trust him. It’s been too long.
“It’s in the past,” I finally say. “We’ve both moved on.”
“I guess we have,” he murmurs. For a second, I almost think he’s disappointed in my response.
The miles slip past. I stare out the window.
“Did you ever think about me?” His question breaks the silence.
I glance at him. He’s still staring out at the road ahead. He looks disinterested in the answer but the white-knuckle grip on the steering wheel makes me wonder.
The truth is simple. Admitting to it, though? Not so much.
I think hard. Can I tell him the truth? Does he deserve it?
“Yes.”
I glance at him just in time to see a flash of something - relief? - pass over his face before he gives me a sweet smile and replies, “I’ve thought about you too, JJ. In case that wasn’t clear.”
Our eyes lock for a split second and I know we can both feel it - the regret of missed opportunities, the loss of what we once shared. In that moment, I think we might be able to rebuild our friendship and find each other again.
Then his phone rings and the moment is lost.
Ashton hits a hands-free answer button on his dashboard. “Yes?” he demands.
“It’s me,” the female voice is apologetic, and I recognize his secretary from back at the office. “I know you said not to disturb you this afternoon, but there’s a situation. With the Castleford case,” she adds hesitantly.
Ash curses under his breath. He yanks the wheel, suddenly pulling off the highway and into a gas station parking lot. I jolt against my seatbelt as he screeches to a stop.
“I have to take this,” he says abruptly, then gets out of the car and slams the door behind him.
I flinch. Whoever this Castleford guy is, Ash isn’t happy.
I watch as he paces away from the car and begins to argue with the caller. His back is tense and he looks furious as he starts to yell into the phone. I can’t hear anything through the glass, but I can tell how angry he is just by his body language.
As I wait, I check my own phone to see if I’m behind on calls. There’s an unread text message waiting, I didn’t even hear it arrive.
It’s from a blocked number. My mystery man.
I want to touch you.
In an instant, I’m transported miles away, back to the dark, sexy room in the club. Touching myself, him watching me. His voice, urging me on.
My nipples stiffen. I feel a rush of heat between my thighs.
I type back, Name the time and place. I’ll be there.
Right as I press Send, the car door opens. Ashton slides back into his seat, his movements sharp with barely restrained aggression.
“Everything OK?” I ask politely.
He ignores my question. “Do you want to get dinner with me tonight?”
I blink in shock. “What?”
Ash looks at me directly. “Dinner. You, me. I know a great dim sum place on the edge of Chinatown. You’ll love it.”
My head is spinning. What is he playing at? Is he asking me on a date?
Then my phone vibrates in my hand. A new message flashes on the screen.
Tonight.
My heart stops.
“JJ?” Ash prompts me, still waiting for my reply. “What do you say?”
“I, um….” I race for an answer. Part of me wants to say yes to dinner. But I need Mr. X. I need to know who he is and why he’s playing this delicious game.
“Oh.” Ashton catches on before I have a chance to say anything. “Do you have other plans?”
“Actually, yes,” I admit.
“Then some other night, perhaps?” he suggests smoothly.
Relief crashes through me. “Sure. I mean, maybe.”
“Who’s the lucky guy?” Ash asks, starting the engine again.
I hide a smile. “You wouldn’t know him.”
Because neither do I.
Yet.