acknowledgments

It’s Momplicated would not have happened without our agent, Wendy Lawton of Books & Such Literary Management. Thank you, Wendy, for proposing the idea of a book about mothers and daughters. Writing this book has been a healing experience for both of us, and we want to express our sincere appreciation for your vision and your handling of this project. We also want to express our deep appreciation to the team at Tyndale. Jillian Schlossberg, you have been our person. Thank you for your insights and positivity. How serendipitous that we were birthing this book just as you were bringing your first daughter, Juliana, into the world! Sarah Atkinson, your vision and humor have inspired us; Kara Leonino, thank you for stepping in and keeping us going; Bonne Steffen, your editing has made this book a thousand times better; Julie Chen, thank you for the beautiful design; and Sharon Leavitt, your prayers and support have made all the difference. We know there are many others behind the scenes at Tyndale, and we appreciate each one of you.

I (Debbie) want to thank Joan for saying yes to partnering on this book. I thought that coauthoring would be hard, but with you it was seamless. We prayed, cried, laughed, did the happy dance, and somehow made it to the finish line loving each other more than when we started. The amount of healing I have received from our friendship and all that you brought to this project is beyond words. Joanie, I appreciate you so much!

Sue Boldt, I cannot acknowledge people without thanking you for the spiritual deposits you have made in my life. Sue, your friendship means more to me than you will ever know. Teresa Burke, Bettina Belter, and Christy Harper, your friendship over the years has been life-giving, and I thank God for you. The Wednesday night “Just-Sayin” sisters: Your support, prayers, and friendship mean so much to me, and I love doing life with you! Thank you to my ministry prayer team for praying me through this project for an entire year, from book proposal to finish. And a huge thanks to the Design4Living ministry team: Kendra Zierau, Kahlilah Guyah, and Janae Brier, your lives inspire me, and I love dreaming of equipping women with you.

A special thank-you to my family, who prayed for us as we wrote this book, often sending encouragement through our Alsdorf-Brier family texts. You all mean more to me than words can express.

Ashley and Megan, I am grateful that God merged our lives twenty-eight years ago, making me your stepmom. And though we have weathered blended-family momplications, we have also grown in love, friendship, and understanding. I love you and thank God for the gift of having you as daughters.

Janae and Kelly, I prayed for my sons’ wives since they were little boys. You both represent God doing above and beyond anything I could have hoped for. Having a mother-in-law has its own momplications, and I thank God for your friendship and the grace you extend to me. You both are truly daughters to me, and I love you more as time goes on.

My precious first granddaughter, Jessa Lynn, you have been a catalyst for healing in Grammy’s life as I worked on this book. Watching you, finding joy with you, and connecting with the little girl that you are helped me reconnect with the little girl in me. I love being your grammy. And my two newest granddaughters, Karis Elise and Lennox Joy, born as this book was being finished, I prayed while your mamas carried you and look forward to watching your lives unfold. I am blessed to be your grammy. I love you so much already.

Though this is a “girl” book, I have to mention my sons and grandsons. Justin and Cameron Brier, you have both brought immense joy to my life since the time you were born. Your friendship and love are such a gift, just as being your mother has been one of my life’s greatest joys. I love you forever, like you for always . . . Easton, Pierce, McCartney, Declan, Jalen, and baby Cooper, each of you boys is loved and is so precious to your grammy (or GiGi; Easton, thank you for that special name). And sweet baby Jace Daniel, waiting for us in heaven, you will never be forgotten.

My sister, Sharon, you will always mean more to me than words can express. You were the one who held me as a baby, took me on outings with you and your teenage friends, and always made me feel special. I hope you know how much you are loved.

My mother, Irene Kenzie, you’ve been gone twenty years, but I still think of you every day. Thank you for the healing in our relationship, your honesty in the adult processing of our pain, and the joy of getting to understand each other more than ever in the end. Most especially, thank you for your very last words to me: “Live like it’s real.” I am reminded to live differently because of you, knowing this life isn’t all there is. Our story is one of redemption. I love and miss you, Mama.

Saving the best for last, my sweet husband, Ray Alsdorf, it’s impossible to thank you for everything you mean to me. You are my greatest support, my sweetest love, and the most precious gift. You have been a catalyst to my growth and healing, and I am forever grateful for you. I get to do what I do because of you. I love you more than the day we said, “I do.”

I (Joan) first want to thank Debbie. Writing this book with you has truly been a joy. God has used you to encourage, heal, and stretch me beyond where I thought I could go. I am amazed at the opportunities he has given me through you. Your relationship with Christ inspires me, and I will be forever grateful for our friendship.

As we wrote this book about how God will meet our needs, I often thought of the many spiritual mothers and sisters he has brought to me. Elizabeth Brown, Diane Fox, and Karen Lahl, you were the most instrumental in my early spiritual life. Sally Beck, Monique Bell, Carrole Johnson, Deb Kleier Nakora, Diane Shore, and Kris Weaver, each of you has been immeasurably important to me. You have been there for me during the hard times, willing to listen and speak truth to me, sharing my passion for a life of intimacy with Christ. Lisa Shrewsbury, Judi Needham-Penrose, and Mary Jean Walton, you have been similarly dear friends, with the bonus that you are fellow therapists. Each of you has been a huge support and has helped me grapple with how God works through us to bring inner healing to others. Snowflakes—my kitchen table church—you have been with me weekly, encouraging me and praying for me at every stage of this book. Words cannot express the gratitude I feel that God has brought our little community into being. Thank you, Amy Closson, Janice Gutierrez, Diane Sims, Jill Vellinger, and Dianne Cantu, who I know is still praying for me from heaven.

Sara and Juli, my precious daughters, you have been an endless source of love and encouragement during this process. Thank you for being willing to honestly talk about our momplications, for always seeing the humor in things, and for being my biggest cheerleaders. D’Anne and Jennifer, you are my daughters in every way other than blood, and I love you more than I can say. Hilary and Madi, what a joy to be given two such lovely bonus daughters at this stage of my life. You are both treasures. Ellie Lien, I’m glad my sister’s dream that you would be part of our family has been fulfilled. To my granddaughters—Karly, Baily, Alexa, and Maya—each of you is incredibly special to me, and I pray that I will leave a positive legacy in your lives.

Even though this is a “girl” book, I cannot overlook Sam, Carl, Kai, Jackson, and Dominic. My love and prayers are with you. To my future grandchildren and great-grandchildren, may hope and healing from this book flow down through the generations to bless you.

There has been a matriarchy of important women in my biological family, all of whom have passed away, but each of whom deserves acknowledgment and honor: my mother, Jane Dods Kniskern; my sister, Ann Kniskern; my grandmothers, Jane Wildman Dods and Vera Culver Kniskern; and my aunts, Betty Dods Lasek and Jean Kniskern Rawlins. Thank you all for the love and care you gave me. I miss each one of you.

I especially want to thank you, Mom. Through writing this book, I see more clearly than ever what a wonderful mother you were.

Steve Kay, my amazing husband, you have made me feel treasured and adored. Your faithful constancy is restoring my ability to trust. You have celebrated my every success and been a haven for me through every difficulty. You have helped me in very practical ways (love that chicken dish you make!) and have never complained about the long hours I put into this project. You are a kind, giving man who embodies the love of Christ to me. I’m grateful for you and I love you!

We both acknowledge that God has truly done more than we could have asked for or even imagined through It’s Momplicated. We are amazed at his grace and favor. It is not easy to get a book published, but God threw the doors open for us and guided us through the entire process. He has used this book to grow us, and we are confident he will use it in the lives of others. He deserves all the glory.