CHILDREN’S NEED FOR REASSURANCE
Before the development of logical thinking, children need lots of reassurance that everything is okay. Without the abil ity to reason or apply logic, children form incorrect beliefs and conclusions. Here are some examples:
When children don’t feel loved, they conclude that they will never be loved.
If something is lost, a child believes it may never be found or be replaced.
If children can’t have a cookie now, they think they will never get a cookie.
This insight helps parents understand why children have such strong emotional reactions.
Children are willful, feeling beings without the benefit of a logical mind.
When parents go away, children may conclude that they will never come back. Reasons cannot reassure children, but listening can. An empathetic response to children’s tender feelings communicates a reassuring message, even though they cannot yet reason on their own.
Reasons cannot reassure children, but listening can.
The parents know they will be back and that everything is okay. This knowing is conveyed directly from the consciousness of a parent when she calmly and lovingly listens and reassures the child that everything is okay. By feeling connected, the child gains the benefit of the parent’s life experience and consciousness.