After weeks of swimming in self-pity, I decided to go back to my apartment. I had not heard from Fernando at all. Carmen called me a couple of times, but when I talked to her, I could tell Fernando had not told her anything so I was playing it cool. He told her he was away on business and she seemed to buy it. I wondered if his parents knew about his real job. The last time we spoke, I told her I was going to a small business owner workshop and I would be out for a week. I had no idea how I was going to keep avoiding her. We made a spa date for next month, and she insisted on Ricky going to their family Sunday dinner. I could not avoid dealing with this anymore. As I pull in our parking lot, I looked around and saw nobody. Perfect. I stood in front of the elevator for a couple of seconds before I pressed the button. Pain pressed my heart as the elevator opened its doors and there was nobody inside. I arrived at my door and my phone rang. It was Ricky.
“Hey, bitch. Are you already in the apartment?”
“Yes.” I was feeling as empty as the elevator.
“You can come back you know.”
“I can’t be a baby anymore, Rick.”
“I know you don’t like me talking about him, but he moved out of the building, honey. You don’t have to worry about running into him.”
“He moved out?” I did not know if I felt better or worse.
“Yes, he was taken off the Carver investigation, of course. Monroe is in his apartment to keep a close eye on you. Fernando insisted.”
“Of course,” I whispered. “Have you talked to him?”
He breathed in deeply. “Yes, he is a hard man to read. I had to go to Sunday dinner and he showed up saying he had to leave for a business trip but we talked for a little while.”
“And?”
“He seems exhausted, frustrated, mad and hurt.”
“My feelings exactly.”
“We didn’t talk much but he asked me about you.”
“Don’t you feel cheated?”
“At first, but I think he got involved with you more than he thought, and by the time he realized it, it was too late, he was in love. I don’t doubt his friendship toward me is sincere. I can tell he loves you, very much. I think he is holding back because of Chuck.” He paused before he told me what he thought of that. I knew already, he’d never liked Chuck. “Do you want me to stay over there tonight? We are finally talking, baby girl.” I felt the love in his tone.
“I will be okay. I am going to the gym and then hitting the sack.”
“Text me when you get back from the gym, okay?”
“Sure,” I said and then hung up. I could not believe it. How could Ricky be so at peace with the fact Fernando lied to us? We met him under false pretenses. Maybe he truly valued his friendship. With our relationship, I didn’t know. I changed into my workout clothes, took my iPod and keys, and headed down to the gym. As I walked down the hall, Victor begun walking toward me.
“Hey, hun.” I smiled but was a little surprised to see him on my floor. He did not say anything but kept walking toward me at a rapid pace. I stopped walking altogether and did not see it coming. He punched me in the face, and as I dropped like a rag doll to the floor, everything turned black.
»»•««
Footsteps on a wet floor woke me up. My face felt swollen and when I moved to touch it, I felt a sting on my wrists. My skin was all bruised and scraped from the rope that was tying my hands together. I could not move. I felt a familiar pain on my chest and I looked down to see my scars were reopened. Thank God I was still wearing my pants, even though my shirt was nowhere visible. I looked around the room and saw different tools on top of a tray and pictures of different Carver victims on the walls. In spite of the pain, I tried to release myself but could not. I was sitting in the corner of the room and my hands were tied to a metal tube that came from the floor and disappeared into the ceiling. A drop of blood ran down my cheek and fell on my lips, making me taste the horrible scenario that was in front of me. This was much more terrifying and real. I’d been able to survive this man once. Will I survive him again? Where am I? What was he waiting for? Why not rape and kill me like the others?
An image of Fernando came to my mind. My heart felt tight in my chest just thinking I would never see him again. Or be in his arms again. Why did I not try to fix things sooner? Ricky, was he all right? Was it only me he had this time? What was I doing before I woke up in this hellhole? On my way to the gym? The pool? I took a couple of seconds to gather my thoughts until I found my attacker…Victor. Victor was the Carver? But he…how could he? Who was he?
“You’re awake I see, sis.” I heard his voice creeping in the room.
“Victor? Why?” I saw him approach me. A man I saw every day looked back at me, but I could hardly recognize him. His face had transformed into the monster that he truly was. “Who are you?”
“Who am I?” He picked up his carving knife. “You don’t even know, do you? Do you?” He was salivating, standing over me, knife in hand.
I just shook my head and looked down at the floor. This was it. I would die right now. Ricky would have to identify me, Fernando would feel guilty for not saving me. Suddenly, I felt my rope’s knot give a little. I needed more time. I needed to keep on talking. I couldn’t give up.
“Listen, I don’t know what I did to you but I’m sorry.” I did not mean a word of it, of course. “Please, let’s talk this out.”
“Sorry sis, I can’t,” he said, pacing around the room. “I fucked up my chances with Ricky. And after killing you, he will never forgive me.”
“Why? I’m sure you have an explanation for all of this. What did all of these people do to you?” I felt one hand almost free. Keep talking, do not give up. “Come on, brother. Talk to me.”
As soon as I said this, a light filled his eyes. He sat down, still with his knife in hand, and pressed his forehead to mine saying, “Brother?”
“Of course. We miss you at the car wash. Didn’t we have great times there? And Ricky, I know him, he will come around. I can talk to him for you,” I said in my sincerest voice. He held the knife and started rocking himself back and forth, slowly making little cuts across his arms. Sick motherfucker. My other hand was almost free.
“My name is Scott Mendez,” he whispered.
“Why would you change a beautiful name like that?”
“I wanted to share yours and Ricky’s initials of course. V and R, just like my signature, V and R.” He got antsy again, repeating both letters over and over again. “Victor Ramos was perfect!” He looked at me with pure insanity in his eyes.
“Oh, I get it. Clever, Victor.” He looked proudly at me.
He put the knife down right by my thigh. “I went to Mrs. Lee’s when I was seven. Do you remember?”
I had no clue. “Of course.”
“Don’t lie to me!” He slapped me across the face and smiled. “I remember like it was yesterday. You were in your room when that monster tried to rape you. Do you remember? But guess what? He visited another bed that night before yours. You were just too busy to see. You and Ricky had this perfect little world. Neither one of you ever loved me or protected me.” He started crying on my shoulder.
“I’m so sorry, Victor. I had no idea.” I leaned against him and tried to remember exactly where the knife was. I moved my hand and finally felt it. What would happen if I act on this? This man was pure muscle. I remembered what I learned at my Krav Maga class, but we were both sitting on the floor. I started crying and saying how sorry I was to buy some time and think this through. This was it, it was do or die. Nobody was coming, I had to defend myself or I would die right here and now. With the knife safely in my hand, I did not think about it again and stabbed it straight through his jugular, kicking him as hard as I could away from me with both legs. Just like that, I heard a gunshot through the window and Victor’s head opened with a single shot to his forehead. The door busted open and Fernando and Monroe come in. Fernando went straight to me and checked me all over.
“Are you okay?”
“No.” I broke down crying and wailing. To my surprise, he held me tightly, sitting down with me on the floor, Victor bleeding next to us.
“It’s all right. It is over. You have nothing to be scared of.” His arms were around me, his hands running through my hair. He held me like he used to, with love. I felt secure as my consciousness faded away. I was bleeding a lot but I could not care less. Being in his arms gave me so much peace. I felt myself floating away from that room as Fernando carried me to an ambulance. He stayed with me, silent but not letting go of my hand. I was in and out of consciousness. I could see the ambulance and it would fade from my sight. I could feel his hand on mine while I was taken into the emergency room and I was out again. I woke up in the room and saw him with a bloody shirt sleeping on a chair, and then he faded away again. I think I heard Ricky’s voice, far away. But I could not open my eyes. Everything was silent again for what seemed like forever until I heard a faded, beeping sound.
“She is awake, call Les,” I heard his sweet voice whisper. As I opened my eyes, there he was in a T-shirt and sweats. His hair was a mess, and he had a short stubbly beard and circles under his eyes.
I wanted to say so much but couldn’t. My mouth opened but nothing came out. “You’re safe. Don’t try to talk. Ricky will be right back,” he said, holding my hand. I felt dizzy and had a terrible headache. My body ached and as I moved a little, I felt I had fresh wounds on my side.
“Hey, bitch,” Ricky whispered as he came in with the nurse. He came over and gave me a hug and a kiss. Tears started to run down my face as I tried to sit up.
“Hey, missy, hold your horses.” Leslie was always the sweetest nurse. “Boys, we need the room, please wait outside.” As soon as the guys left, she turned to me. “We have to stop meeting like this, Vanessa.” She had a wide smile and her signature hoop earrings. “Let me give you some water.”
Leslie took good care of me. She gave me medication, bathed me, changed my bandages, and brushed my hair.
“Now there, back to your beautiful self,” she said, admiring her work while all I wondered about was if she knew Fernando’s real profession. I kept silent and she respected that. “I’ll tell the doctor you are awake, I think he was having lunch just now.” She arranged my pillows perfectly before she left. I looked around the room and did not recognize where I was. Maybe one of the clinics? Who knew? As my mind was traveling, the doc came in with the same kind smile.
“Hello Vanessa, remember me?”
“Of course,” I finally said.
“Escudero told me everything and the police are aware of what happened to you. I’m happy to tell you all your wounds are superficial. I can refer you to a specialist to deal with your scars but that is only for cosmetic effect. You’re a tough woman.” He smiled. “I’m keeping you here for a couple of more days to monitor since Escudero is insisting but you can leave tomorrow if you like. You know how to contact me.” With that he left.
Ricky came in as soon as the doc was out and went straight to my side. “Girl, you gave me a scare.”
“Victor…”
“That fucker is dead, thanks to you and Fernando. I knew something was off with him. We had no idea the Carver was right under our noses the whole time.”
“How do you…”
“The FBI were able to listen to the conversation he had with you before you stabbed him. They were looking for a way to save you. They also had a sniper ready and Fernando said that he had the ‘go’ to shoot as soon as he got a clear view. Which he did after you kicked him.” He leaned in and kissed me. “You are so brave, baby girl.”
I shook my head but he insisted, “You are.”
“Where are we?” I looked around me.
“This is one of Fernando’s clinics. He brought in a whole team to look after you. You were out for two days.” He did not elaborate more on the subject.
“Where did the Carver have me?”
“After Chuck was ruled out as a suspect, Fernando kept on tailing a couple of people, including Victor. He was out of the investigation but he did it anyway. When you did not text me back, I called him and he tracked down Victor’s car to an abandoned warehouse downtown. He called Monroe and a whole squad went to save you and get Victor.” I closed my eyes and he held me. “You’re safe, we all are.”
“He saved my life again.” I could not believe the whole drama.
“He loves you. He asked me to call Chuck and let him know what happened, just in case you two were together. Of course I said there was nothing between you two but he does not seem to believe me. Chuck was here earlier but he left after he made sure you were okay.”
Tears and exhaustion took over my body, and I felt myself shifting away again. “But I love Fernando, I do,” was all I remember saying before I drifted off to sleep.
»»•««
I opened my eyes to a low beeping. The light was dimmed and my body aches felt a little better. There was a dark silhouette sitting on a chair right next to my bed.
“Ricky?” I whispered.
“It’s me, Vanessa.” His low voice soothed me and I was happy, secure and at peace being in his presence.
“Fernando?”
“What do you need?” He stood up and came right by my side.
“I need you to know I love you and only you.” I looked up to see his beautiful smile.
“I’ve heard that.” He caressed my face carefully. It still felt a little swollen.
“What?”
“You have been saying you love me over and over in your sleep.”
“You have to believe me, I…”
He leaned in and kissed me softly. “I do. I’m so sorry about everything. I did not know how to tell you the truth about me. I took out all my anger on you when I found you with Chuck because I thought the worst had happened. I thought I’d lost you.”
I shook my head. “That could never happen but it was wrong for me to go see Chuck. I felt cheated and I wanted to hurt you. I cannot lie to you, I did kiss him but he could tell that it was not real. Nothing happened between us. I have been in love with you since I met you in that elevator. Can you ever forgive me? Please?”
I could tell how difficult it was for him to hear, but I wanted only the truth between us. “As long as you never leave me. My heart can’t take that again.”
“Now would be a good time for you to tell me the truth about you, as soon as I use the restroom.”
“Of course.” He held me while I stood up, and as soon as I felt stable, we walked to the bathroom. I was lightheaded but the painkillers were working. I looked worse than what I felt. After relieving myself, I went to the mirror and stared in horror at my wounds. My tears started to run down my face again until I realized that I was alive, a perfect man loved me, and I had a family to go back to. I brushed my teeth and washed my face as well as I could. I brushed my hair and realized all my things were in the bathroom waiting for me, even my favorite PJs and socks. Carefully, I walked out of the bathroom, and Fernando was waiting for me right outside my door. There was a fruit salad, toast, and a tall glass of juice waiting for me. I sat down carefully and Fernando pulled the tray right in front of me.
“Eat up.” I complied right away and he began to explain. I felt like I was about to meet him all over again.
He let out a big sigh. “After the first five clinics were open and running smoothly, the only thing I had to do was look over the investment and do a yearly audit. I was bored out of my mind. I was going out with whoever, my family was okay, and I had a lot of time to kill. My buddy in the police department approached me, hiring me to give identities to undercover cops as employees. I was hired as a consultant on different cases of white collar corporate crimes, since my corporation was growing so much statewide.” I held on to every word. He sat next to me, touching my hair while I continued to eat.
“I was referred from the police department to the FBI and they approached me with a serial case. That was my first one. It was a man that would commit Medicaid fraud and would lure his victims through a web of lies saying he would take care of them until they died. He would collect their pension and retirement checks. This guy would kill the victim and become them. With his expertise of disguise, he would impersonate the victim to continue collecting checks. He would prey on elderly men that nobody cared about. Since they thought my background and experience with the police department would help, they also hired me as a consultant. It was such interesting work I asked to be trained and became an agent. My best asset was that I had a whole life as a business owner. Nobody would suspect that I actually worked for the FBI. Since I do not need the money, I choose only a couple of cases a year. We have some pending, it could take years, like yours. I love detective work. Monroe and I have worked on many cases and he even bought a clinic as an investment. We are quite close.”
“Does your mom know?” I was curious after I remembered what his parents told me after meeting me.
“Would I be able to hide anything from that woman?” He smiled. “Only my mother and father know. That’s it. I am undercover so my identity has to remain intact. They know of my work but have no clue about the different cases I work with, until I got involved with you. We have been investigating the Carver for years now. I moved to our building when we found out about Ricky and you. I was there to protect you. We knew it was a matter of time until the Carver came. And then, you had to make me all jealous with that fake date you had.”
“It was not a fake date.”
He looked at me, waiting for me to say the truth. “Fine, it was fake, but you would not talk to me.”
“I wanted to, my boss told me I had to get closer to protect you not knowing I wanted to get closer for a lot of other reasons.” His devilish smile had returned. “I convinced myself it was all part of the investigation but Monroe would not believe me. He saw right through my bullshit and wanted to take me off of the case since the beginning. I feel partly responsible for your initial attack. We were briefing our superior and got into a major argument. Our meeting took longer than expected and when I went to pick you up, I found you half dead. I almost died that day too.” Pain was written all over his face.
“That business trip you took, you were here right?”
“Yes. I did not leave your side,” he said, his lips pressed tight. “I needed a breather since I knew already I was in love with you, but your security was my main priority. I could not lose track of that. Shit, Vane, I wanted to tell you, so many times. And when I got home and found my office opened, the food, the wine, my room full with candles and rose petals. I lost it. Chuck was still on our suspect list and after checking everyone, he was the only one missing. I thought he took you and would kill you.” He puffed his chest and with closed fists he stood up. “It took us hours to find you and I thought I was too late when I broke down the door to see you half naked on a bed with your ex and a bottle of whiskey.” I stopped eating and looked down, ashamed. “I had lied to you and lost you. The detective in me took a back seat and I saw red. I wanted to kill Chuck for having you in his bed. I lost my mind.”
“I’m sorry,” I whispered, realizing my own actions in this mess. He sat next to me again.
“I have to share the blame, if I would have come clean, you would never have run. God knows what you were thinking after you found my research wall. I looked like the killer myself.” I felt his arm around me. “I hate that asshole, but Chuck is a good guy. He came to see me, told me nothing happened and that I was fool if I let you go. He has to live with that for the rest of his life. He told me if I let you go, he would be right there, and before he continued talking shit, I told him to leave. I was ready for round two.” I smiled as I saw his jaw tighten. “You think this is funny, huh?”
“It is pretty hot.”
He smiled and leaned into me, making me breathless. “You are mine.” He started to kiss my neck softly.
“I believe I am, now and forever, if you will have me,” I said with my eyes closed.
He took me in his arms. “I will never let you go,” he said before he gave me a delicious kiss.