ANTONIO AND HIS team were gelling pretty well. He looked forward to the new challenges that each day brought, but if he were honest he had to admit that he also missed Izzy. The sessions were intense, though, and there really wasn’t time for any fraternization. No chance to tempt her away from keeping things platonic.
But tonight they were all going into town to celebrate the engagement of Thor and Jessie Odell. Jessie, an extreme survival expert, was the daughter of famous nature documentary makers. She’d grown up on different nature shows on TV that had been broadcast all over the world. He’d had classes with Jessie, and it had taken only one lesson before he’d realized that she wasn’t a “celebrity” but someone who actually knew her stuff.
Because everyone at the facility and the ranch was attending the party, they’d rented a hotel ballroom in the Five Families area of Cole’s Hill—a posh neighborhood with mansion-size houses and a championship golf course. Six Hummer limos would transport everyone to and from the party.
Antonio had taken Carly for a walk, played with her and then crated her for her evening in. He had taken care with his clothing, but then he always did. His father said that clothes weren’t enough to make a woman fall in love, but heads turned more quickly for someone who looked like he’d taken time with his appearance.
Hennessy and Meredith were already in the limo when he climbed in. They were both on his team and were specialists with backgrounds in theoretical physics. They were deep in a very technical conversation about potential anomalies the teams might encounter.
The scent of wildflowers and cinnamon preceded Izzy as she climbed into the limo. She wore a light summer dress that was loose and flowy around her waist and hips, and skimmed the top of her thighs. Their eyes met and he felt a flash of heat go through him. He’d missed her.
He might have spent the last week seeing her in his dreams, but those dreams paled with the reality of her. Her skin seemed creamier than he remembered, her lips lusher, her limbs longer and her smile sweeter.
“Hey, you,” she said, taking a seat next to him.
“Hey. How’s it been going?”
“Not too bad. I haven’t suddenly decided that I want to be a cowgirl, I’ll tell you that.”
He laughed. “That’s probably a good thing.”
“Agreed. How’s the simulator?” she asked. “I’m dying to start working the large maneuvering arm. I’ve been playing with the program on my laptop, but it’s not the same as using the actual device.”
He loved that they shared an engineering background. “It’s good, very similar to the old shuttle payload crane. I have notes on some changes I’d like to see made—I’ll be interested to know what you think,” he said.
“I can’t wait. Next week I’ll be in there,” she said, then changed the subject. “You look nice tonight.”
“As do you,” he said.
“After days of wearing jeans and boots and being sweaty from riding fence or moving cattle from one pasture to another... I can’t wait to be back in my Cronus golf shirt and khakis and focusing on moving different sections of the way station into position. Who else has been operating the equipment?”
They discussed the other candidates who were payload specialists as the limo filled up and then it was time to go. Someone turned on the radio, and everyone groaned as Elton John’s “Rocket Man” played.
“I used to love this song,” Izzy said. “Mom took me to see Elton John in Vegas one time. He was really good.”
“It’s okay. I prefer ‘Space Oddity,’” Antonio said. “My second-oldest brother plays classical Spanish guitar and always plays it for me when I’m home,” he said.
He missed his brothers. He was used to being away from them, but usually had some contact. Here at the training facility, they were being acclimated to long absences from their family and friends, with only weekly emails allowed, and no phone or video calls.
But Carlos had sent him a digital file of his music and whenever Antonio missed home, he played it.
“As far as ‘space’ songs are concerned, I’m a big fan of ‘Satellite’ by Dave Matthews Band,” Izzy said.
“That’s a good one,” Antonio said. The radio cut out while someone plugged in an iPod, and then “Starboy” by The Weeknd featuring Daft Punk started playing and everyone went wild, clapping and singing along.
“Love this song,” Izzy said.
He nodded, feeling oddly melancholy. She was doing the friend thing. Making it seem that they had never seen each other naked. And he saw how pale an imitation it was from what they could have.
He resented it.
He knew that part of what he felt stemmed directly from the fact that she looked so damned good tonight and he wanted her.
He hated having to deny himself Izzy.
For a few brief moments when they’d been in each other’s arms, he’d caught a tiny glimpse of what could be and he craved it.
He wanted her. He needed her. And right now he knew only one thing with totally certainty—to hell with being friends.
* * *
IZZY SPENT THE night drinking mocktails and dancing with everyone in the Cronus candidate program except Antonio.
He was funny and smart and quick-witted. Not a lot of people checked so many boxes for her. But of course he did. He always had, she realized, which was precisely why she’d tried to avoid him.
She groaned.
“You okay?”
Meredith Korman was one of the other women in the candidate program. Her call sign was Brainiac. She was smart—like scary intelligent. She was also a little on the shy side but very nice.
“Yes. Just struggling with something.”
“Playboy?” Meredith asked.
“What? Is it that obvious?” Izzy asked her friend, taking another sip of the nonalcoholic mojito and wishing it were the real thing.
“Not really. It’s just I saw the two of you in the limo. Don’t take this the wrong way, but you were trying hard to be all cool and it looked...well, painful,” Meredith said.
“Well, nuts.”
Meredith laughed. “I doubt anyone else noticed.”
“Except Antonio,” Izzy muttered.
“Probably. That man doesn’t miss much. So do you want to talk about it?”
She could use someone to talk to, someone who could reinforce she’d made the right decision when she’d shut Antonio down. “Unless you know some way to make me magically stop wanting him...” Izzy said.
Meredith laughed again. “I bet I could make a million dollars if I came up with some sort of synthetic spray or pill that could make that happen.”
“You could,” Izzy said. For the first time in her life she actually understood why her mother had been in so many relationships. This feeling...it wasn’t love because it wasn’t that deep, but it was affection. A feeling of butterflies in her stomach whenever she looked at him or thought about him. A little bit of obsession. She wanted to groan again but stopped herself.
“If it makes you feel any better, he does look at you when you aren’t paying attention,” Meredith said. “I think whatever is going on between the two of you is mutual.”
“That doesn’t make it any easier. You’d think with training, my mind and body would be exhausted every day—and they are—but also there are moments when I’m wide-awake in the middle of the night and can only think about him,” Izzy said. “Sorry to be rambling on about it.”
“I did invite you to,” Meredith said.
“Thank you for that. How are you finding the program?” Izzy asked, wanting to turn the topic from her personal life.
“I love it. I’m not really looking forward to having to do the ranching part. The simulator is everything I’d hoped it would be. My section is isolated from the others and the work is so satisfying. I really am excited to be on the project.”
Izzy was a little concerned that Meredith liked being alone. That might raise a problem down the road if she were selected for a mission. The teams all had to function together.
“I’m glad to hear that.”
“Thanks,” Meredith said. “I think the first limo is heading back soon. I’m going to be in it. You coming?”
Izzy shook her head. She wasn’t ready to leave yet. Meredith got up and left, and Izzy decided it was time to stop ignoring Antonio. She had to figure out what exactly was going on between them.
He was by far the handsomest man in the room. For someone with his reputation, he was not living up to it tonight. He’d spent most of the time at one of the high bar tables talking to Ace and Dennis.
She walked over to the men and they all looked up and smiled at her, Antonio rose from his chair and held it out to her. “Please join us.”
“We were watching everyone mix and trying to decide if we should discourage the candidates from...” Dennis trailed off.
“Hooking up?” she suggested.
“Well, yes,” he said, a little chagrined. “No one has really made a decision on whether or not couples would be sent on the Cronus mission and so far we haven’t had an astronaut couple apply. But watching the group tonight made it clear we might to have to deal with that at some point.”
Izzy felt a shiver run down her spine as Antonio glanced at her. They had to be careful. Neither of them wanted to do anything that would hurt their chances of making the team, but if Dennis decided against couples...
“Luckily that’s not an issue,” Izzy said.
Molly arrived, and Dennis excused himself so Molly and Ace could dance. Antonio looked over at Izzy and her earlier resolve came back.
She held out her hand to him. “Wanna dance?”
* * *
HEMI’S BROTHER MANU, the former defensive end for an NFL team and now a special teams coach for the NFL, was the deejay for the evening. He kept the music lively and the dance floor full by playing a blend of modern country and Top 40 hits combined with perennial dance favorites. He also used the time between songs to share stories of Hemi that kept the candidates and ranch hands laughing. Most of them saw Thor only as a serious astronaut.
He took Izzy’s hand and followed her to the dance floor as Manu played “Cake by the Ocean” by DNCE. Izzy danced the way she did everything else, with ease and grace. He watched her, for once not having to hide his interest.
Talking to Ace and Dennis had brought home the fact that he might have to choose: Izzy or the Cronus mission. Which made their decision to be only friends all the more important. That wasn’t helping to calm the blood flowing heavily through his veins.
He watched her mouth as she sang along to the song. Wanted to kiss her again, remembered how her lips had felt under his and wondered why he had ever thought that once would be enough. Wondered if he could have her one more time and still maintain a little of his sanity.
He doubted it.
Though not having her wasn’t exactly helping his sanity, either.
He caught her hand as the music changed to “Closer” by The Chainsmokers, and he pulled her into his body, swaying along with the music. She wrapped her arms around his neck and their eyes met.
He saw the same desire, the same pent-up longing and confusion in her eyes that he felt deep in his soul. He rested his forehead against hers and closed his eyes, but that made the keen longing worse.
Her perfume was subtle but distinctive and he remembered how it had lingered on his skin after they’d made love the first time. Her body was warm and curvy, pressing into his as they moved, and he suddenly didn’t care about anything but Izzy.
He moved them around the dance floor to a corner of the room hidden from view. He put one hand on her hip and the other on the wall behind them.
“What are you doing, Antonio?” she asked.
“Taking a chance that you are as unhappy with the ‘just friends’ thing as I am,” he said, mere inches of space between them.
“I am,” she whispered. “I’m so torn right now. I can’t stop thinking about you, Playboy. I can’t figure out if being lovers would fix the problem.”
“It can’t hurt,” he said. He wasn’t concerned that she’d called him by his call sign because the old edge to her tone was gone.
“I hope you’re right,” she said, looking up into his eyes.
He was taking a risk. Hell, so was she. Dennis and Ace were watching them all and looking for reasons to bench candidates to make the pool smaller and their decision easier. But he knew that denying himself Izzy wasn’t helping his chances.
She distracted him and he couldn’t let her continue to do so.
He took her hand loosely in his and led her out of the ballroom at the historic Grand Hotel located on Main Street and led her through the lobby to the front desk.
“Are there any rooms available for tonight?” he asked the desk clerk.
Izzy squeezed his hand as the clerk handed them a key. Antonio had the presence of mind to ask for a late checkout before he took Izzy’s hand in his.
She matched him step for step and he had a flash of the two of them in their space suits walking up the gangplank to the rocket together. He wanted that to be true, wanted her in his bed, in his life and in space with him. But for tonight only one of those things mattered. When they turned away from the open balcony area and down the private corridor that led to their room, she tugged him to a stop. Wrapping her arms around him, she went up on tiptoe and kissed him with all the passion he’d seen in her the last time they’d been intimate.
This time was better. He knew what she liked and angled his head to deepen the kiss. Her tongue slid over his and she sucked his deeper into her mouth. He put his hands on her hips and drew her into the cradle of his thighs.
For the longest time he let the kiss deepen. She rubbed her center over his growing erection and finally he lifted his head and looked down into her heart-shaped face. Her skin was flushed and rosy, her lips full and glistening. She watched him with a surety that made him want to toss her over his shoulder and run to the room.
But he settled for taking her hand in his and leading her there.