Marie and Angela walked along the streets in Nelsonville glancing in store windows. Angela was using a cane to steady herself, as her balance had become compromised in the last few months.
“What will you do after college?” Angela said. “You should think ahead.”
“You sound like Mom.”
“It doesn’t hurt to think about things.”
“The next step would be graduate school, but I may choose a different path.”
“You can choose whatever path you want, just choose one. Do you still have your boyfriend?”
“Yes, he’s clerking for a judge in New York.”
“Is he important to you?”
“I guess he is, but I don’t share what you and I talk about.”
“So, he doesn’t know about your experiences?”
Marie did not have the fortitude to break it off. Her relationship with Josh made her feel part of the world in a concrete way.
“No, but that’s okay. I am satisfied with where the relationship is right now. I’m walking between the worlds.”
“If anyone can do that, it’s you,” Angela said. “I’m sure your mother would like to meet him. You should bring him to see us one weekend.”
“I could do that, but I think he would find Nelsonville old-fashioned.”
“You mean he would find me old.”
“I think he will find you exotic. And you’re not old at seventy-seven.”
Marie put her arm around Angela as they sauntered toward Morning Glory Avenue. It was a sunny fall day, and the leaves were changing into brilliant oranges and yellows. The brisk autumn breeze reminded Marie of her moving day to New York City two years before. The day she moved she had started her life, and prior to that she felt she was marking time.
“I did not think this town could serve your needs,” Angela said.
“How so?”
“When you were a little girl, you wanted to know all about New York and who lived there. You loved your Uncle Joe’s stories even when you were three years old.”
“Really?”
“I think you always knew what you wanted. You knew where you wanted to be.”
Marie thought that maybe Angela was right but that she had just taken detours to please others and fit in. She had experienced flashes of insight about where she wanted to be as a child, including her attraction to New York City and other worldly experiences, and when it came times to choose, she chose to follow her flashes.
“I just followed the flashes I had about my future. I think it was my intuition bleeding into my everyday life. They felt like possibilities, and through your support I explored those possibilities.”
“Glad you see that. Do you need anything before you go back to the city? Do you have everything you need?”
“Yes, I have everything.”
“Don’t forget to bring your boyfriend the next time you come home. We all want to meet him.”
~ ~ ~ ~ ~
One Saturday morning, Marie and Josh boarded the train to Nelsonville at Grand Central Station.
“My family is different from yours,” Marie said.
“All families are the same,” Josh said.
Josh had a penchant for critical analysis. It was also important for him to be around materially successful people. He had never even pondered the possibility of an unseen world or an intuitive approach to life.
“I wouldn’t say that. My family immigrated to this country not long ago, so their attitude toward life stems from that point in time.”
“Are we going to talk about hardship and the American experience? Do they rehash the past?”
“Sometimes, but when they do they put a different spin on it. They know how to turn any negative encounter around, and they do not mince words.”
“I look forward to meeting them.”
“Great. Keep that in mind.”
~ ~ ~ ~ ~
Marie and Josh walked toward Felicia’s car.
“Mom, this is Josh.”
“Josh, it’s so nice to meet you,” Felicia said. “I’ve heard a lot about you. You’re a lawyer?”
“Guilty.”
“I work with a lot of lawyers. In my experience, some of them just don’t know what they’re doing.”
“I don’t disagree. I’m clerking right now, but I will probably go into teaching.”
“That would be a stable career; smart move. I’m hoping Marie will make the same smart choice.”
Josh smiled at Marie, pleased that he had found common ground with Felicia right out of the gate.
“I always encourage her to decide on a stable career.”
“You do?”
On the short ride, they mostly talked about Josh’s developing career. Angela was waiting on the porch as they ascended the stairs.
“Marie, so glad to see you,” said Angela. She hugged Marie and kissed her on each cheek. “And this is your boyfriend.”
“It’s nice to meet you all. I wish I could say I know a lot about you, but Marie seldom talks about her family.”
“Ask us anything you want,” Angela said. “We can get to know each other that way.”
“It’s just the four of us this weekend,” Felicia said, “so we’ll have plenty of time to get to know one another.”
Marie suddenly felt trapped and exposed. She had presented herself one way to Josh and had not revealed the true influences in her formative years. She took a deep breath and prepared to embrace the journey.
“We have made lasagna for tonight,” Angela said.
For new guests, Angela would serve basic, traditional Italian dishes that were familiar to Americans, like spaghetti and meatballs.
“I love lasagna,” said Josh.
After they had settled into their respective rooms, Josh found Angela in the kitchen.
“So, you helped raise Marie and her siblings.”
“Me and their mother. Their father, Nunzio, died many years ago.”
“It’s nice that your family pulled together after he died. I did not have turmoil in my upbringing. Anything I wanted, I got.”
“That doesn’t mean you had a healthy upbringing,” Angela said.
“There you are,” Marie said. “I thought we’d go for a walk before dinner.”
“Your aunt and I were getting acquainted.”
“We can do that at dinner,” said Marie.
Marie and Josh left through the side door. Angela thought Josh had presented himself as stable and responsible, but she wondered how he would feel about Marie as she revealed more of herself.
Marie and Josh walked hand in hand toward town. She could tell he was uncomfortable with the provincial atmosphere of Nelsonville. They came up to an old church with a playground surrounded by chains.
“This is the Catholic school I went to, up until the eighth grade.”
“It’s like something out of a sit-com. Now I understand why you are the way you are. I mean, that house you grew up in. It’s no wonder you have trouble staying in the present, all of this is a blast from the past.”
“What do you mean?”
“It’s just an observation.”
“Are you saying I don’t fit into the modern world?”
“I’m saying this town is steeped in the past, and it is unsophisticated. I’m surprised you got out.”
Marie released Josh’s hand and moved away. It was not surprising to Marie that she had left Nelsonville. She finally saw Josh’s limited vision—not only toward her, but himself. He would be content teaching in a law school, buying a house, and living an upper middle-class life. Her vision extended past that into the unseen world and beyond. Josh saw the physical world as the only reality.
“Where do you want to live in the future?” Marie asked.
“Wherever my career takes me, so I can move up in my career.”
“I would not move around for a career. I would choose a place I loved and build a career there.”
“That’s the difference between us,” Josh said.
“Let’s go back,” Marie said. “They’ll be waiting for us.”
~ ~ ~ ~ ~
“I am enjoying this lasagna,” Josh said. “I was telling Marie today that I was surprised she got out of this town. It’s the kind of town that grips people for life.”
“Felicia and I both encouraged the children to reach past Nelsonville,” Angela said. “Isn’t that right, Felicia?”
“New York has been a great resource for us,” Felicia said.
“I imagine Marie would have lived a mundane life had she stayed in Nelsonville,” Josh said.
“Marie would never live a mundane life, no matter where she lived,” Angela said. “That would not be possible.”
“How do you know that?” Josh asked.
“I would say that she expands her mind and uses her intuition.”
At the beginning of dinner, Marie had hoped the conversation would not go in this direction, but after her interaction with Josh earlier she was happy to let the discussion go where it needed. It was inevitable that Josh would find out about her predilection toward the occult world, so it was best to finally expose who she was.
“I always thought she should pay more attention to daily happenings, rather than indulge in fantasy,” Felicia said. “She has a tendency to do that, but I think with your influence she will be more practical.”
Marie felt she was as unseen as the invisible world. This was an opportunity for her to be who she was, and either be accepted or rejected.
“I do not indulge in fantasy,” Marie said. “I just add to the physical world through connecting with the unseen.”
“You can’t believe you actually contact other realities,” Josh said.
“I’ve done it my entire life.”
Marie took a deep breath and felt the words roll uncontrollably off her tongue. Retraction was not an option.
“I told you,” said Felicia, shaking her head. “Fantasy.”
Angela felt she should say something but decided to let Marie take the lead.
“There isn’t just this reality, there are a zillion others—too many to count. So, I don’t live my life only in the physical; that would be far too confining.”
Marie looked around and waited for a response. Time, which Marie had regarded as a nebulous concept, froze as she felt Josh and Felicia’s fixed stares.
“To each their own,” said Josh, “but I happen to know that this is the only reality that matters.”
“How do you know?” Marie asked.
“Because if I can’t see it, it does not exist,” Josh said. “I have enough issues with this reality. I don’t need more.”
“I agree with you,” Felicia said. “Who needs more problems?”
“That does not mean the occult world is not there.”
“How do you know it is?” Josh asked.
Angela felt that this conversation was long overdue. It was necessary before Josh and Marie became more serious about their relationship, but now she saw that their romance would face a huge challenge.
“Because I have experienced it. Isn’t that right, Aunt Angela?”
“You know that I have experienced the unseen world firsthand and that you have the gift. I wonder, Josh, why are you so against communication with the other side?”
“This is ridiculous,” Felicia said. “I’ll serve the dessert.”
“What have you experienced that I don’t know about?” Josh asked. “I guess I don’t know you that well, since you don’t really share your life.”
“I’ve met beings no longer on the earth plane and also met someone who didn’t have a shadow because he didn’t have a soul.”
“Marie!” said Felicia. “Let’s talk about something else.”
Marie felt a weight lift from her mind, knowing she no longer would have to choose her words carefully so she would not offend someone. She would not have to negate her experiences or who she was. The rest of the meal was spent talking superficially about New York City and all the changes taking place. Marie was shocked that she just declared herself, for all intents and purposes, a witch—and that everyone simply had moved on.
~ ~ ~ ~ ~
Josh and Marie rode the train back to Manhattan in heavy silence. Regardless of the state of their relationship, Marie had been authentic, and that had brought her an uncomfortable peace. It would be impossible going forward to hide and pretend that she was someone else. Concealing who she was would no longer work, but being herself would have its consequences, both positive and negative. She would have to embrace both. She needed to break the ice with Josh.
“Maybe we should take a break from one another,” Marie said. “I know that was a lot to take in.”
“I was thinking the same thing. We are so different, and we don’t have much in common. I don’t agree with your beliefs.”
“They’re not beliefs, they’re my personal internal experience. I am open to other points of view. I am not as rigid as you in your opinions.”
“I am entitled to my opinions, but what you’re espousing is beyond simple opinion, and most people would find it unsettling. Your mother does, but your aunt has obviously had a major influence on you.”
Josh turned and stared out at the passing landscape. The train pulled into Grand Central Station, and they stepped onto the platform.
“I’m going to stop and see a friend,” Josh said, “so I’m not going straight home. I’ll give you a call.”
Marie watched as Josh walked away, becoming smaller and smaller as he slipped into the crowd and disappeared. She thought that she should call after him and say that she would not keep exploring the unseen and that the physical world was enough for her, but that would be a lie.
She was sad that she had lost the relationship, but relieved that she was finally free to be herself. It seemed that the platform at Grand Central Station had been a stage for her family to play out dramas, as it was the link connecting the suburb community in Nelsonville to the intensity and richness of New York City. Marie resolved that it was time for her to embrace her future in Manhattan.
She remembered what Angela had whispered to her years ago, “Give up the longing to belong.”