AT STADIO OLIMPICO that night, despite it being the third Maroon 5 concert Nathan had attended to date, the experience was made extra special because he was with Preston. The swimmer wasn’t necessarily a music fan, since he dedicated every waking moment to swimming, mentally training for a race, or watching footage of himself in the pool. Even in the gym, he opted to listen to generic electronic dance music, of all things, while working out. He said the beats were easy to move to while running on the treadmill or lifting weights.
Nathan sneaked a sidelong glance at his friend and caught Preston watching him. “What?”
“Shouldn’t Maroon 5 be on?” he asked—more like shouted over the loud music—referring to Raging Velvet.
“Oh, right,” Nathan teased. “Concert virgin.”
Preston dropped his gaze. “Training.”
“Well, you’re not training right now.” Nathan nudged him with a shoulder. “Just enjoy the music.”
“But where’s Maroon 5?”
“There’s always an opening act. They get the crowd ready for the band.”
“Oh.”
Nathan nodded. Then he began moving to the beat. At first Preston stood rigid, shaking his head. Not allowing him to just stand there, Nathan bumped their shoulders together, then started dancing circles around him. By the second chorus, Preston’s lips twitched until a smile formed. He returned his attention to the stage and began swaying to the beat as well. Nathan figured that was as much as he was going to get, but at least it was something.
That night, having the boy he loved go with him to watch what was for all intents and purposes his first crush perform gave the experience a surreal quality. Intense feelings jumbled in his chest. Love for Maroon 5. Complete adoration for Preston. Amazement at this beautiful night. Not once had he thought that he would ever experience something like it. Even if the tickets had come from the guy he’d promised to murder on behalf of his sister.
“Preston, I love you.” The words came out before he could stop himself.
“What?” Preston shouted back at him, leaning down. “Were you saying something?”
Nathan pressed his lips together and shook his head. He hadn’t been thinking. Maybe because somewhere in the back of his mind he’d known Preston wouldn’t hear him anyway. But saying the words made him realize he could say them. That he wasn’t afraid to say them. He just wanted the right time. The right place. Where Preston would hear him loud and clear.
With Preston still staring at him, waiting for a response, he said, “This band’s actually good. I think I’ll buy their album after.”
“Yeah.” Preston returned his gaze to the stage, where Raging Velvet rocked the arena.
It wasn’t the way Preston said the word that made Nathan’s heart beat fast. It was the grin that came with it. This was a totally different Preston. Nathan relished the fact that he could be the only one with the pleasure of seeing him that way. Yet another beautiful memory to file away along with the others he already had.
* * *
The roar of sixty thousand voices threatened to pop Preston’s eardrums. The experience was surreal. This many people in a stadium made to look like an amphitheater overwhelmed him. Even without looking back from the front row, he was sure nobody sat in their seats. The humongous stage was located just a few yards away from where they stood. Massive speakers on scaffolds towered on each side, and lights shone brightly from the metal rafters high above them.
The energy screaming fans threw at the stage took his breath away. It was totally unreal. They chanted the band’s name, fists in the air. His skin tingled, forcing him to stuff his hands into his pockets to keep from rubbing the goose bumps on his arms. He hadn’t felt anything like it. Not even while walking toward the starting block before a race. This was a different kind of monster.
It dawned on Preston that he had missed so much because of his training. Sure, he’d been invited to concerts, but he always had to decline because he had practice every day, before and after school, and even on the weekends. At some point he had stopped being invited to things, especially when he had been gearing up for a competition. After all, why would anyone invite him to anything if the answer was always no?
As Nathan swayed to the Raging Velvet performance, Preston found himself studying his friend. In a light sweater and chinos, Nathan still looked put-together. Yet he seemed so different. Caught up in the present. Sweat glistened on his skin.
Recalling their dinner at the pub, sure, it had started out as something he’d hoped would make Nathan laugh, but he couldn’t deny that a part of him had enjoyed pretending to be Nathan’s boyfriend. Gathering Nathan close to his side with his arm around the other boy’s shoulders seemed right. Every touch and smile that entire evening seemed so right, even if everything had exploded in his face at the end. He realized, remembering how it had felt to take care of Nathan the day before, that there was another part of him that didn’t want to stop pretending.
He glanced down at his palm. His fingers itched to smooth away the tumble of dark hair that had fallen over Nathan’s forehead. The feeling both confused and thrilled him. Just like this concert, the feeling was overwhelming, and he had never felt anything like it.
As if sensing him staring, Nathan glanced up and asked, “What?”
“It’s just…” He cleared his suddenly dry throat. “I’ve never seen you like this before.”
“Like what?”
“Free,” he said, finding the word he’d been searching for.
“Finally enjoying yourself?” Nathan asked, eyes gleaming with unabashed pleasure. It did things to Preston. Stirred up feelings he’d been mulling over since Ireland. At almost the same time, they smiled at each other.
“This”—Preston gestured toward the stage, then the crowd—“is fucking awesome!”
As soon as he finished speaking, he went with the first thing that came to mind. He pulled Nathan into a tight hug. While the opening act thanked everyone for coming, Preston continued to hold on. He didn’t know what had possessed him to hug Nathan, but as the other boy returned the embrace, a prickle rushed over his skin as excitement coursed through him.
“Thank you,” Preston whispered into his ear.
“Hey, I should be the one thanking you.”
“That’s not what I meant.” He shook his head, his chin rubbing against Nathan’s shoulder. “Thank you for saving me from myself even when I was being a stubborn asshole.”
“What do you say we hit the beach next?” Nathan asked, taking Preston by surprise.
“The beach?” Preston pulled back and met his friend’s gaze.
“Yeah.” Nathan smiled. “I think you’re okay to swim again.”
“I think the beach sounds nice,” Preston said.
Right at that moment, the crowd began calling out for Maroon 5. It distracted Nathan. He began chanting the band’s name as well. Preston stood there, unsure of what to do. He hated that he no longer had Nathan’s attention.
A spotlight focused on Adam Levine in a white T-shirt and black jeans. He had tattoos going down both arms, and his head was shaved on the sides and longer at the top, slicked back away from his face. The name of the band flashed on the giant screen behind them.
The scream that came then couldn’t compare to anything Preston had ever heard. And he’d thought listening to the crowd cheer for Raging Velvet was as loud as it would get. He actually had to cover his ears. The roar was a physical force—a wall of love rushing the stage. He couldn’t imagine how receiving that much adulation felt. The tension in the air shifted immediately from mild euphoria to full-on insanity. The arena practically vibrated.
The Maroon 5 front man hadn’t even said a word yet. Preston had expected Adam to greet everyone the way the vocalist of the band before had done. Instead, drumsticks clicked together, counting down. Immediately the group launched into an explosive rendition of their most popular song—fast and emotional. The massive screens exploded into a kaleidoscope of shapes, accompanied by lasers shooting out into the audience from directly behind the band.
At the up-tempo chorus, an explosion of light flooded the stage. Screams of glee rippled across the stadium floor. Preston’s gaze dropped to Nathan, who grinned, eyes fixed on the lead singer.
Preston’s breath caught as a twinge of jealousy ran through him.