Talia
Ram’s version of a family gathering and mine were very different. Of course, I’d only had my father, and we hadn’t exactly done things like this. But I’d watched families in our neighborhood or at the park. It seemed a little strange the bikers were letting their children run around a bar, though. Then again, maybe this was the only option they had without making everyone find a spot outside.
“So, you all come drinking here when the women and kids aren’t around?” I asked, as Ram helped me find a table.
“Yeah.” His cheeks flushed a little. Huh. Something told me they did more than drink in this place. I eyed the floors and the chair he pulled out for me. Someone hadn’t been having sex on this recently, had they?
“Ram, if I ask you something, will you answer honestly?” I asked.
“As long as it’s something I’m permitted to tell you.”
“Do the men in this club have sex in here?” I asked. He froze in the middle of sitting down and stared at me. Yep. I’d just hit the nail on the head. “And they think this is a good place to bring their wives and children?”
“The women understand what they’re signing up for. I know for a fact Badger would never cheat on Adalia, so he comes here to drink and that’s it. The others who have paired off might be the same way. And if you’re wondering, no, I wouldn’t have sex with random women if I had someone at home waiting for me.”
“But you have while you were single,” I said. “Please tell me you’ve gotten tested.”
He cleared his throat and looked away. “Not recently, but I’ll get it taken care of tomorrow. If it makes a difference, I always used condoms.”
I cast a subtle glance in Riley’s direction. “I see how well that’s worked out. Of course, Riley is wonderful and I’m glad she’s here. Think you have any other kids out there?”
“Jesus,” he muttered. “I hope not.”
“Why are we here? The people we brought with us are cowering in a corner. The men in your club are really loud, and a bit scary to be honest.”
“I told you why they were having a family gathering. I’m giving you time to adjust, then I want to take you over to Adalia and Shella. They can introduce you to the other women. Riley already found Coral and seems to be doing fine.”
I looked over at the table where Riley sat with Coral and a little boy. He looked younger than them, even though he was taller than both girls. They’d decided to play a board game and were getting it set up.
“Let’s say I do stay here with you and Riley. What would I do every day? What would life look like as part of this club?” I asked.
“Sometimes I’ll get sent out on jobs. Might be gone for an hour or two, and other times I could be away for days or even a week. I don’t think I’d have to go farther than that. As for what you’d do, whatever you want. You could stay home, get a job, go to school. I’m not trying to lock you in a cage, Talia.”
I nodded. I knew it, to some extent. I still had a hard time believing he wasn’t like all the other men I’d ever met, and yet, he proved he was different every second of the day. Truth be told, I was scared. I felt antsy and wanted to run away. At first, I’d been terrified I’d fall for him and he’d break my heart. Now other things worried me. What if I didn’t fit in with these people? What if no one liked me and it caused problems for Ram and Riley?
The biker’s daughter was another issue. She wanted me to stay, for now. She could change her mind at a later time. If that happened, would Ram make me leave? I couldn’t imagine him choosing me over his daughter, and I wouldn’t want him to. Riley deserved to have her father in her life. Unlike me, she had a good one.
“Can you give these people a chance?” Ram asked. “I know I’m asking a lot. You’ve been hurt so many times before. I get it. I really do. But Riley isn’t the only one who needs a support system. You do too, Talia. I think you could be friends with Adalia and the others, if you genuinely tried to get to know them.”
“You’re doing that thing again, aren’t you? Where you try to guide me by asking questions, so you’re not really telling me what I should do, but asking if trying something will harm me in some way. I hate it, mostly because it seems to work.”
He smiled a little. “Good to know. How about I get you a drink and send Adalia over?”
“Fine. I’ll take a soda. I’m not twenty-one yet, and I’ve never liked the taste of alcohol anyway. The few times I managed to sneak some, it either tasted bad or left me feeling awful.”
“I’ll be back. And, Talia, thank you. Whenever it’s too much and you want to go back home, just tell me. We’ll grab Riley and leave.”
I watched him go and wondered why he had to be so damn nice and understanding all the time. It pissed me off. I couldn’t stay angry with him because I knew he was trying to help me. At times, it felt like he was manipulating me. Then he’d give me that look, the one saying he worried about me. No one had ever cared about me before.
Adalia came over with Ram. He placed my drink in front of me, kissed the top of my head, which shocked the hell out of me, then walked off again. Adalia gave me a bright smile, except it looked a little forced.
“You don’t have to pretend you want to sit here,” I said. “I know Ram asked you to come over.”
She sighed and slumped in her chair a little. “Sorry, it’s not you. I haven’t been feeling well tonight. Headache from hell, and all this noise isn’t helping.”
I wanted to ask why she was here if she felt so awful, but her husband was the club president. I imagined the job came with certain expectations. Kind of like someone marrying the president of a country. She’d have duties she’d be expected to handle, or places she needed to be. It must be the same for Adalia. Did Badger realize how much she was hurting right now?
“Can I get you anything? What helps when you get a headache?”
“Other than silence?” She shook her head. “There’s nothing you can do, but I appreciate it. I’ll stay a little while, then tell Badger I need to lie down. He’ll probably worry himself to death and rush me home. Gunner and Luis are close, so our son may go to Dagger and Guardian’s house for the night. And our Ivory really likes Slash’s daughter, Audrey. They’re cousins.”
“Audrey and Ivory are? So, is Slash your brother or is Shella your sister?” I’d had so much thrown at me in twenty-four hours, I couldn’t keep it all straight. I just knew I’d end up calling someone the wrong name before the night was over.
“Shella and I were both adopted by Grizzly. Same for Lilian and…” She pressed her lips together. “Meredith. You won’t get to meet her anytime soon. Our fault, not hers.”
It sounded like something she may not want to discuss, so I left it alone. Except now I wondered what happened between them. Ram had talked about Grizzly a few times. It sounded like he’d been a good man. It was a shame he’d passed away.
“Maybe things will get sorted out sometime.”
“Someone might bring it up at some point, so I’ll tell you this much. Doolittle and Minnie are together now. When she first came here, it wasn’t pretty. She’d been a, um…” She froze, which only piqued my curiosity more. “I don’t know what Ram has shared about the way the club works. The single guys need to blow off steam, so there are girls who come here to party with them. We call them club whores. Anyway, Minnie had been one at another club. Doolittle brought her here, and along the way, they fell for each other.”
“I’m confused. What does that have to do with Meredith?” I asked.
“She had a crush on Doolittle. He’d told everyone for years he didn’t feel the same about her. Anyway, Meredith acted out, made everyone turn on Minnie, and when it made Minnie run off, Doolittle went off on the entire club. He was so pissed. I never even knew that sweet man could be that mad.” She shrugged. “We deserved his anger. Turns out Minnie was pregnant. When Doolittle brought her back home, Grizzly sent Meredith on a trip. We all thought it would be for the best. None of us considered she’d never come back.”
“But she’s still alive, right? Just doesn’t live here?” I asked.
“She’s with a man called Lynx at the Savage Raptors MC over in Oklahoma. She made peace with Grizzly before he died and got to spend a lot of his last days with him. At the time, it hurt me, Shella, and Lilian. It took a little time, but once the pain ebbed some, I realized we’d had so much more time with him than she did. I couldn’t be angry about it anymore.”
“But the others don’t feel the same?” I asked.
“I think they’re mostly over it, but Shella will never admit she might have been wrong. And Lilian… she’ll probably reach out to Meredith before Shella will. I’ve spoken with Meredith a few times. I’m not angry with her, but it hasn’t felt right to ask her to come visit either. With Grizzly gone, and her feeling so unwelcome here, there’s no point. I don’t want to ask her to do something that could end up hurting her again.”
I leaned forward. “Maybe you should talk to Ram. This sounds like something he could help with.”
Adalia gave a slight nod. “I’ll bring it up to Badger later. Any questions about the club? Doubts? Fears? Hit me with it. I’ll answer to the best of my ability.”
I looked around the room and realized I didn’t have the first clue what I should even ask. Everything seemed pretty straight forward. Alpha bikers. Club whores. A bar. I did notice the women all wore a cut like Ram had, except theirs claimed they were property of someone.
“You don’t find it demeaning to be called Badger’s property?” I asked.
“Not even a little, because I know he’s just as much mine as I am his. This property cut keeps me safe. When I leave the compound, it lets other people know the Devil’s Fury are at my back. Someone fucks with me, Badger is going to destroy them and everyone they know. Think of it like… carrying around bear spray.”
I choked on my swallow of soda. “Bear spray?”
“I couldn’t think of a better analogy, but yeah. Instead of spraying someone in the face, they just take one look at the leather over your shoulders and know they have a choice to make. Be a dick and possibly lose their lives or keep walking.”
“Huh. When you say it like that, it seems like something every woman should have.”
“Right?” She gave me a soft smile. “I’ve enjoyed talking to you, and you’re welcome to stop by the house anytime you want. I think I’m going to tell Badger I need to go.”
“I hope you feel better.”
Adalia got up and went to search for Badger. I saw Heather and the others sitting nearby and decided to go visit with them. I noticed most of the bikers were keeping their distance. Probably a good idea. I didn’t think Heather would run away, but some of the others might. They looked ready to bolt at any moment. Even though they’d let Ram help them, being in room with so many men was completely different. Especially big, gruff-looking ones.
“Everyone doing okay?” I asked.
“I think so,” Heather said. “Someone came by this morning and got our lists. A few hours later, we had groceries, clothes, and anything else we’d need for the next week or more. I think most of us are still feeling a little lost and woke up this morning expecting to see bars surrounding us.”
“If I can help with anything, let me know. Even though I’m not staying with all of you, I’m only down the street.”
She leaned in closer. “What’s it like living with Ram?”
“He’s really nice, thoughtful, and genuinely wants to help people. We haven’t had an argument or anything, if that’s what you’re asking. He actually wants me to stay. Indefinitely.”
Heather nodded. “I kind of got that feeling when he hauled us out of that warehouse. He couldn’t seem to stop watching you. Even at the store, he might have kept an eye on all of us, but his gaze was constantly flicking over to you, as if he needed to make sure you were still there.”
Really? I hadn’t noticed. I felt a hand on my shoulder and looked up at the man in question. He leaned down and spoke low near my ear. “I thought you were supposed to meet all the women from the club?”
“Adalia wasn’t feeling well and went to find Badger. It’s fine, Ram. I know her and Shella.”
“Wait here. I’ll bring over Farrah and Mariah. They’re sisters. One is with Demon and the other is with Savage. I’ve heard they can be… difficult, but since they’ve lived with two clubs, they might have useful information for you.” He drew back and returned a few minutes later with two women in tow. After a quick introduction, the women joined us at the table.
The two looked at each of us sitting at the table, and I couldn’t quite tell what they were thinking. Although, the look in Farrah’s eyes made me think we fell short of her expectations. Ram did give me a warning of sorts. Was he sure he wanted me to meet these women if he was trying to convince me to stay?
“So, you’re the one staying with Ram?” Farrah asked, looking right at me.
“Yes. And Riley,” I gave a nod toward the girl in question. “She’s Ram’s daughter.”
“Have you ever been around bikers before?” Mariah asked. “They aren’t like most men.”
“Ram is the first I’ve spent time with,” I admitted. “I have no idea how this club thing works, even though Adalia did give me a little information. Ram mentioned you’ve lived with two clubs.”
Farrah nodded. “We both grew up in the Dixie Reapers MC. Our dad was their VP until recently. For us, this is a normal way of life.”
“Farrah is with Demon. He’s the Sergeant-at-Arms here, and I’m with Savage. Although, I didn’t come here voluntarily. My dad wanted to get me away from a bad situation, even though I was stubborn and insisted I was in love with a man who ended up being a monster. Savage agreed I could be his. He’s the club Treasurer. So we’re both with officers.”
Uh-huh. Did that mean they felt they were better than me? Because their dad and their men were all officers, or had been in the case of their father? I didn’t give a crap about any of it. The hierarchy here didn’t mean anything to me. The way Farrah lifted her chin a little, with a slight smile on her lips, said yeah, she was a pampered princess who thought her shit didn’t stink. I couldn’t stand women like her.
“All right,” I said, refusing to play into their hands. With my lackluster response, they both sobered and looked at me like I’d just sprouted horns. Clearly, people tended to react more favorably to their bragging. “My dad was a gambler who beat me, stole my money, and could barely keep the lights on or food on the table. I’ve been taking care of myself for a very long time.”
“Is that why the kidnapping and what Vega did to you seemed like it didn’t even bother you?” Heather asked. “I thought you were acting so strong and brave for all of us.”
“The first guy I trusted ended up raping me, then he let his friends have a turn. The second guy took everything I had, knocked me unconscious and left me for dead. The third… Well, you get the picture. Anytime I’ve put my faith in someone, or tried to take their proffered hand, it’s come back to bite me in the ass.”
Heather’s eyes went wide, and she reached over to give my hand a squeeze. “Well, for what it’s worth, I’ll be your friend if you’ll let me. If it weren’t for you, I’m not sure how things would have turned out for us. The way you went toe to toe with Ram, it showed me he wasn’t a bad man. If he were, he’d have hit you or even killed you. You were so brave, and it gave me the courage to step up and hot-wire that van.”
“You haven’t realized what a good thing you have,” Farrah said. “I may not know Ram, but if he’s part of this club and he wants you to be his, then he’ll do anything to protect you. You’ll never have to work, worry about starving, or whether you’ll have a roof over your head. Shouldn’t you be more grateful to him?”
I couldn’t tell if she was trying to sell me on Ram and the club, or if she was picking at me. Perhaps it was a little of both. I did think she came off as a little stuck-up. As for her sister, I think she tried to emulate Farrah, which wasn’t necessarily a good thing. Looking at her, I imagined her to have a sweeter nature.
“I don’t mind working for the things I have or need. It’s what most people do. I’m not the type to sit at home like a pampered pet. And no offense, but if the two of you are supposed to convince me to stay, you’re doing a piss-poor job of it.”
Farrah gaped at me. Before she could respond, Demon came over, grabbed her, and tossed her over his shoulder. “If you’ll excuse us, ladies, I believe my wife needs another lesson on manners.”
“She didn’t do anything wrong,” Heather said, going pale.
Demon paused. “I’m not going to hurt her, although she might not want to sit down for a day or two. There’s a lot you still don’t know about all of us, including some family issues that haven’t been completely dealt with yet. So don’t take this as a club thing. It’s personal.”
He left, with Farrah beating on his back and calling him names. Mariah stared after them before scanning the room. She must have found her man because she shrank in her seat, as if hoping he wouldn’t notice her. It didn’t take long for Savage to come get her.
“She didn’t cause trouble, right?” he asked.
“From what I hear, you’re just as bad as her,” Ram said. “Did you seriously go to the Dixie Reapers and treat Ridley’s sister-in-law like shit? You, Mariah, and Farrah should all be ashamed. What the hell would Grizzly think of how all this played out? And yeah, Badger told me tonight. He worried Farrah and Mariah might not behave themselves around Talia. If I hadn’t thought they might give her better insight to how clubs work, I would have kept them away from her.”
Savage muttered something I didn’t catch. Did this have to do with the story Adalia was telling me? Or was it some other drama that happened? Maybe I didn’t want to stay with this club. Were they tough bikers, or toddlers throwing tantrums?
I wanted to go home. I’d had enough of these people for the night. I’d liked Adalia, but the others… Truthfully, I hadn’t met enough of them to form an opinion. Were there others like Adalia? Or was everyone else like Farrah and Mariah? I’d had enough drama to last me a lifetime.
Two more ladies came over and took the empty seats Farrah and Mariah left behind. One of them smiled brightly. “I’m Lilian, and this is Elena. I’m with Dragon, and she’s Outlaw’s wife.”
“Farrah and Mariah can be a little much, especially after coming back from their last trip home. It’s a long story, but essentially, their parents told them to leave and not come back until they grew up. They didn’t behave well while they were there, and their attitudes haven’t gotten any better since they came back to the Devil’s Fury.” Elena shrugged a shoulder. “If it’s any consolation, the rest of us don’t bite.”
Lilian pointed across the room to two Asian women. “That’s Mei and her mom, China. Well, Mei’s full name is Meiling, and I can never pronounce China’s real name without butchering it, so I don’t try. I feel like I offend her every time I get it wrong.”
“Neither of our children are close to Riley’s age,” Elena said. “But you’re welcome to come over and talk, or we can find a movie everyone will like. It’s important for Riley to bond with people here, and I’m betting you could use some friends too.”
Lilian tapped her finger on the table. “I’m sure this is all a bit too much, and maybe even scary. But for what it’s worth, I’m glad you’re here. I haven’t heard about Ram before, and only met him for the first time tonight, but he seems like a sweetheart. I think being back with the club will be good for him, as well as for you and Riley. If you can give us a chance.”
The women stood and walked off, leaving me with Heather and the others. They’d remained quiet during the exchange. In fact, it almost seemed like they wanted to disappear. This was probably a lot for them to handle, but Heather had a thoughtful look on her face. She scanned the room, and I noticed her gaze stopped on a biker. From here, I couldn’t see what his name was, but he didn’t give off a menacing vibe. Had she met him already? Or had he just caught her eye during the party tonight?
I had a lot to think about. I liked Adalia, Lilian, and Elena. Shella had seemed nice too. If I wanted to stay with Ram, then I needed to get to know these people. I hadn’t ever really had friends. Not since I was a child. What would it be like to have an entire group of people I could rely on? Someone I could talk to when things were bothering me?
Ram made his way back over to me, placing his hand on my shoulder. Until this get-together, he’d been careful not to touch me. I really did need to talk about my past with him and let him know he didn’t scare me. Not in the way he thought anyway.
“Ram, do you think we could go home? I think I’ve had enough for today,” I said.
“I’ll get Riley. Meet me out front in a few minutes.” He kissed the top of my head again and hurried over to Riley. Heather leaned in close to whisper to me.
“If you give him up, you’re stupid. Just saying.”
Yeah, I was beginning to have that same thought. Ram wasn’t like any man I’d ever met before, and even in this room full of bikers, he still stood out. He wasn’t quite the same as them.
And I’m the lucky bitch who gets to live with him.
Fine. I’d deal with the club in my own way. I wouldn’t embarrass Ram, but I wouldn’t take anyone’s shit either. Farrah and Mariah had said and done everything to appear nice, unless you looked deeper, or studied their words more. Arrogance was only the beginning with those two, but it looked like maybe they were going to be taken down a few pegs by the end of the night. Good. They clearly needed the attitude adjustment. If what Lilian and Elena said was true, then others in the club thought so as well.
“Goodnight, everyone,” I said before heading to the front door.
Was it wrong I hoped we didn’t have to do this again anytime soon? All of them in one room was far too much for me to handle. I’d be better off meeting people two or three at a time. I’d mention it to Ram and see what he had to say. Tomorrow. For tonight, I just wanted to put on my pajamas and go to bed. It had been the longest day ever.