| |
“Practice sex is still real sex,” Charlotte stammered.
This conversation was not going the way she’d expected.
Mike was looking at her in an odd way, in a way he’d never looked at her before. There was no trace of humor or lightheartedness in his expression. He looked fierce.
She felt a strange thrill down her spine.
“What I’m trying to tell you,” he said, “is that I can’t have meaningless sex, not with you. If we have sex, it’s going to mean something to me.”
“Oh.”
“Oh, indeed. You’re going on about practice dates and practice kisses and practice sex, but I can’t go along with that anymore. I had a crush on you when we were younger, and since meeting up with you again... Well, I want you. In my bed, yes, but more than anything, I want you to see me as something more than your practice date.”
She sat there, stunned.
She had not expected this.
“You’re serious?” she whispered, even though she knew he was, but she was still wrapping her mind around this.
“Of course I’m serious. The way you draw eggplants with peaches for balls, the way you insult my taste in cider and lattes—it drives me fucking mad. The way you kiss me...” He shook his head.
She didn’t say anything.
He stuffed a big bite of cake in his mouth, drained his caffeine-free latte, and stood up.
The loss of him next to her—she felt it acutely.
He felt this way about her? Mike, the boy who’d draw and play by her rules?
“You had no idea back then, did you?” he said.
She shook her head. Julie had said he’d had a crush on Charlotte, but Charlotte hadn’t believed it.
“And now...” he began.
“Now I...”
“It’s fine. I never expected you to feel the same way.”
But it wasn’t fine. She could see it in the taut lines in his face, and she hated to see Mike looking like this.
And that wasn’t all.
Because she had been thinking that she had teeny-tiny feelings for him.
She clutched his wrist before he could leave. “You took me to a baseball game, and despite my bad experience the previous time, I had fun. You understood me. You took me to a cool bar and...”
God, she was just listing dates they’d gone on. Dates he’d planned specifically for her, and that wasn’t so remarkable, but after all those stories of shitty first dates, it had seemed rather remarkable.
It was more than that, though.
She couldn’t explain it.
“If you could let me go,” he said tensely, “I’d appreciate it.”
“But I do...I do have feelings for you.” It was hard to choke out the words, but he needed to know the truth. “I didn’t mean to fall for the guy who was teaching me how to date, but it happened all the same. I told myself it was no big deal, just teeny-tiny feelings, but that’s a lie. They’re not tiny.”
When she thought of him walking out of her life again... Yes, she knew she felt more than she’d assumed earlier.
“You...” He sat down again, looking a little dazed. “You really want this? No more practicing?”
“Yeah.” She twisted her hands in her lap. “I can’t make any long-term promises, and I haven’t been in a relationship for a while, so maybe I’m terrible at it, but I want to try. If that’s enough for you.”
“It’s enough.”
In the subsequent silence, they both breathed heavily.
“You want to get out of here?” she asked.
He responded by grabbing her hand, and she followed him out of the coffee shop, not even bothering to finish her latte.
And that was truly shocking.
* * *
They went to his apartment because it was closer.
When they stumbled into his bedroom, Charlotte slipped her hands under Mike’s shirt and pulled it over his head. She ran her hands over his chest and growled in frustration.
“What is it?” he asked.
“I want to see you.”
He flicked on the lights, and she had her fill of him. He wasn’t bulky, but he was muscled in lots of great places.
And then she couldn’t see him anymore because he was pulling her shirt over her head, followed by her bra.
Afterward, he looked like he’d been stunned into speechlessness.
He likes me.
It was such a heady feeling, to have that returned. Like she was high, except the one time she’d gotten high, it hadn’t been much fun. She’d—
She gasped as he dipped his head and sucked her nipple into his mouth. A jolt went right to her core. Surely she’d felt something like this before, but it had been so long since she’d been touched this way, and never had it been with Mike.
He shifted his attention to her other breast before lifting his head, a wicked smile on his face that nearly melted her into a puddle. He placed both of his hands on her cheeks and kissed her mouth; it was exquisitely needy and intimate. Then he walked her backward until her calves hit the side of the bed, and she toppled onto it.
He followed her, and he just kept kissing her and kissing her.
“I want this to be so good for you,” he murmured.
“I have no doubt it will be.”
“Just stop me if you ever need to, okay? Don’t be shy. You can boss me around. That’s fine, too.”
At his invitation, she grabbed his hand and placed it on the button of her jeans. He opened them up and slipped his hand into her underwear.
“Charlotte. God.”
He slid his fingers through her wetness as he kissed her, and she arched against him. She considered making a comment about his eggplant, but in the end, she simply unzipped his jeans and reached into his boxers.
She closed her eyes and felt how hard he was.
Yes, this was definitely a heady feeling.
He wiggled her jeans and underwear down her hips and tossed them aside. She hadn’t been naked with a man in so long, but she wasn’t uncomfortable. Not with him.
He circled her entrance with a fingertip. It was excruciating; she needed more.
And then two long fingers thrust inside her, and she let go of him, practically mindless. She squirmed and murmured incoherent words as he took a nipple between his lips again.
Oh, God. She couldn’t keep track of everything he was making her feel. She just knew it was good.
When he slid downward, she tensed in anticipation.
Still, when he swirled his tongue over her clit, she was shocked by the sharpness of the sensation.
He licked her lazily, as though taking all the time in the world to savor her.
She fisted the blankets. “Mike...”
He looked up at her, which was a shame because he wasn’t licking her anymore. But the way his eyes were blazing, the intensity of his gaze...
She swallowed. “You like it when I say your name.”
“Yeah, Charlotte, I do.”
Then he licked her with abandon, and she gripped the blankets even more tightly and thrust up to meet him. When she came, she shattered as she never had before.
He raised himself up and crawled toward her, licking his lips. Last weekend, she’d imagined him doing just that after going down on her.
Frantically, she shoved off his pants and boxers. She took his cock in her hand and watched his face as she pumped once. Twice.
“Like I told you,” she said, “I’m terribly out of practice, so...”
He hissed out a breath. “Don’t worry, you’re doing fucking great. Too great, actually. If I blow my load before I’m inside you...”
He fumbled for something in his night table. She watched as he tore open the packet and rolled the condom onto his cock.
“Do you want more lube?” he asked.
She nodded. Probably a good idea, even as wet as she was. It had been a damn long time, and he was...well, not a fucking giant, but a pretty good size.
He pulled out a squeeze tube of lube, and she took it from his hands and tried to squeeze some onto her fingers. But nothing came out, even though it was nowhere close to empty.
He unscrewed the lid and pulled off the foil covering.
Oh. It was new. When was the last time he’d...
She was distracted by him applying the lube. He wiped his hands on a tissue and positioned his cock at her entrance. She felt unsteady and desperate.
He slid inside, just a little. “Okay?”
She nodded. She grabbed his ass—ooh, that was nice—and pulled him farther inside. He shut his eyes, as if overcome, and she felt a deep rush of affection...and desire. When she wrapped her legs around his waist, he pushed the rest of the way inside.
It was too much, too much.
At the same time, it was just perfect.
He started to move inside her, and she clutched him against her, needing all of him. She pushed her hand through his hair and brought his head down to hers, kissing him as he moved. Such a glorious feeling.
She’d forgotten just how wonderful sex could be.
He bit her lip lightly, and that caused another jolt of pleasure. His mouth moved to her breast again, and God, that was amazing, too.
He rocked faster. “I think I’m...”
His body shook against hers, and she touched every inch of skin that she could.
“Charlotte,” he said quietly, and her name reverberated through her, even as he rolled onto his side. “Next time, I’ll last longer. I promise.”
“When’s next time?”
“Whenever you want it to be.”
“You should have had a big latte so we could do this all night. None of that decaf shit.”
“Don’t you worry. I don’t need caffeine, not when I have you here.”
After they cleaned up, she returned to bed with him, and he put his arm around her and pulled her against his side.
Somehow, she’d completely forgotten about this part of a relationship. There was kissing. There was sex. But there were other kinds of touching, too. Like post-coital cuddling.
It was surprisingly comfortable, given she was so used to being alone.
He propped himself up on his elbow. “So, was it...okay for you?”
He sounded uncertain.
She thought of the unopened lube. “When was the last time you had sex?”
“It was a while ago, yeah.” This was accompanied by an uncharacteristically nervous laugh. “Not five years, but I’m sure you’ve had much more sex than I have, since you were in a long-term relationship. I’ve never had anything that lasted close to a year.”
“Nor were you picking up lots of women in bars and having one-night stands?”
“Nah, not so much.”
“But you...” Then she realized that he’d never said he had lots of experience with dating. She’d just assumed.
“You were so keen on the idea of me teaching you,” he said, “and I thought maybe it would be good for me, too. Give me practice at dating, getting close to someone. I’m sorry I misled you. I should have told you earlier. If you’re pissed, I understand.”
She felt a moment of annoyance that he hadn’t told her, but that wasn’t what troubled her the most.
“It’s fine,” she said. “Don’t worry about it. But you’re cute and charming and easygoing. I thought surely people would be lining up to be with you.”
Or perhaps he’d been pushing them away.
Huh.
But they were here together now, in bed, and he’d asked a question she had yet to answer.
“It was really great for me,” she said, “and I’m not just saying that for your ego.”
“Yeah, that wouldn’t be like you.” He paused. “I was hoping to make you come more than once.”
“I’m always happy with once. And I never come just from penetration. You’d have to...you know.”
“Ah. I should have been thinking about these things. I just...” He gestured vaguely.
“I was so hot that I made your brain stop functioning. Yeah, yeah, I get it.” It was weird for her to talk about how hot she was, but it was clear he saw her that way.
He laughed. “Something like that.”
It was nice to hear him laugh again.
“Any tips for me?” she asked. “After all, you were supposed to be the one teaching me.”
“I don’t want to hear about practice kissing and practice sex ever again,” he growled, rolling her underneath him.
As soon as he did that, she realized she’d said those words partly to get under his skin. Like when she teased him about decaf coffee. But teasing him when they were both naked and he could easily roll on top of her...or kiss her...or suck on her nipple...
Yeah, it was kind of thrilling. And the thought that he liked her made Charlotte a touch giddy, and fuck, she was not the kind of person who did things like giddiness.
She wanted to clarify a few things first, though.
“No more practice dates,” she said, “but where do we go from here?”
“I’m not sure. You now know I’m hardly an expert at such things. Take it slow and see where it goes, I guess?”
“Sounds good to me.”
“I promise I won’t date anyone else. There’s no one but you.”
He bent down and kissed her on the lips.
“What should we do now?” she asked. “You got any ideas?”
“I have tons of ideas.”
And, indeed, he did.