Chapter 29

Tina was already swimming downward. I saw her, maybe ten feet below, lifting Vale’s genie jar to her mouth and taking a fresh breath of air. She might have been smart enough to come up with that trick, but my method seemed more foolproof.

I was holding my breath, and I felt perfectly fine. I could do this for an hour. That had to be a world record!

The water beneath us looked dark and foreboding, but things were going swimmingly.

And then I got hooked.

I was diving peacefully when my shoulder brushed past a cord of invisible fishing line. I ducked sideways through the water just as the huge hook passed me by.

I thought I had successfully escaped, when the massive worm suddenly lashed out like a sea serpent, winding its slimy body around my arm. There was a sharp tug and then I felt myself being reeled upward.

Since I was holding my breath, there was no possible way to get Ridge out of his jar to make a wish. Even if I could get him out, I knew talking underwater would mostly sound like “gurgle-gurgle-gurgle blub.”

I punched the nasty worm, but if you’ve ever tried underwater punching, you know that it’s not very effective.

I tried going limp and playing dead with the hope that I would slip through its grasp. While I was in this flaccid state, I saw Tina off to my left. Or maybe my right. She appeared to be having some trouble of her own.

Another hook and worm had found her, too. She was wriggling like a fish desperate to get free, but her demon worm had managed to wrap itself tightly around one ankle.

At last, I broke the water’s surface. The bearded fisherwoman was leaning against the railing of the red boat, straining against the bent pole.

“It’s a good one!” she shouted. “Look at the size of him!”

“Ridge!” I shouted, as the fisherwoman eased me closer to the boat. “Get out of the jar!”

The genie appeared in the water beside me, floundering for a moment as he realized where he was. “What happened?” he cried.

“What does it look like?” I shouted. “I need you to muumuu us out of this mess!”

At the mention of the trigger word, I rolled stomach down in the water, giving up my last bit of resistance against the worm and the fisherwoman. At the same time, Ridge became a shark and shot through the air, his razor teeth snapping the line that was pulling me in.

The fisherwoman stumbled backward, slipping on the deck of the boat. As soon as the line was severed, the worm that held my arm seemed to dry up and unravel, sinking with the massive hook to the bottom of the lake.

The bearded woman recovered quickly, grabbing another fishing pole from a mount on the rail. “Fish on!” she cried, reeling hard. A second later, Tina broke the surface of the lake, gasping for air.

“Ridge!” I shouted, struggling to swim while facedown. “Cut her loose!” The air shark genie spun around, biting through the line that held Tina captive.

“Are you out of your mind?” Tina shouted at the burly fisherwoman.

“I am a guardian of the Ancient Consequence. I have been placed here to catch my limit!” the woman replied. “Whatever pain my hooks cause you will be nothing in comparison to what you will find in the Cave of the Undiscovered Genie.”

It was another warning, similar to what we’d heard at Mount Rushmore and Super-Fun-Happy Place. I wanted to ask her for more details, but she looked to be prepping another fishing pole.

“I don’t think she’s going to stop,” I shouted to Ridge and Tina.

Vale’s voice echoed out of the jar in Tina’s hand. “Let me out of here! I can help!”

“Yep,” shark Ridge said. “She’s itching.”

“We’re going to need something to cut the lines if we get caught again,” I said to Tina. If only my shark could swim! “I wish for a knife!”

Ridge turned to me, his shark mouth opening wide to explain the consequence. “If you want a knife,” he said, “then any time you sneeze this week, a grape will fall out of your nose.”

“What?” I cried. “I don’t have grapes up my nose!”

“I know,” said Ridge. “But the Universe will cause one to fall out whenever you sneeze.”

“Would it be a red grape or a green grape?” I asked.

“Does it matter?” Tina cried, ducking as the fisherwoman cast a giant hook and worm.

“It might!” I said.

“Green grape,” answered Ridge. “The sour kind.”

“That’s gross,” I said. “Bazang.”

I felt something land in the back pocket of my pants. Since my pants were on backward, it was really the front pocket. Floating on my stomach in the water, I reached down and retrieved the item I had wished for.

“What’s this?” I cried, holding it up. It was the smallest knife I had ever seen. Like the kind my foster mother used to cut olives. The blade was probably less than two inches long. “Why’s it so small?”

“You didn’t mention the size,” Ridge said. “That’s what the Universe gave you.”

“Not cool, Universe,” I muttered. “It better be sharp enough to cut the fishing line.”

“Let’s dive down and find out,” Tina said.

“Aren’t you wishing for something?” I asked her, wondering if she’d come up with some other brilliant plan to avoid getting hooked by the evil worms.

“We’ll stick together,” she said. “You can cut me loose with your knife.”

I glared at her, feeling like she’d just used me. “That’s a dirty trick.”

Tina shrugged. “It’s not a trick,” she insisted. “I don’t see why I should make a wish when we already have a perfectly good knife that would work for both of us.”

“It’s two inches long!” I shouted. We didn’t really have time to debate. Every second wasted meant Thackary was closer to getting away. “Muumuu,” I said. The shark turned into a boy, who fell into the water with a splash as I said, “Ridge, get into the jar.”

A puff of smoke, Ridge disappeared, and I was able to float upright again. Tina swam over to me, but I dove underwater before she could say anything. If she wanted my help with the knife, she’d have to keep up.

I darted straight down. Now that I knew what to look out for, I could see a few fishing lines, nearly invisible in the darkening water. One was close enough that I decided to test out my new knife. Sliding the tiny blade along the clear line, I felt the knife snap through, successfully severing the hook somewhere below.

Suddenly, an overgrown worm on a different hook whizzed past my head, leaving a trail of bubbles. I managed to dodge the reaching bait, but Tina wasn’t so lucky. It took her around the middle, snugging her tightly against the huge hook. She was jerked upward, but I was there to cut her loose before she got far.

Tina took a breath of air from her lip balm jar and gave me a grateful look as we swam on. I cut through two more lines that brushed threateningly close. And once, a beastly worm managed to wrap on to my leg. But the knife, despite its miniature size, seemed to be sufficient defense against it.

I estimated we’d dived about a hundred feet when the fishing net got us.

It was so dark, I didn’t see it until it wrapped around me. Tina was snagged up, too, and we collided underwater as the net tightened its grip. I used my little knife in hopes of slashing my way free, but the net was made of thick strands and I barely managed to saw through one as we were dragged upward.

Tina kicked and thrashed, but that didn’t help at all. By the time we reached the surface of the lake again, our arms and legs were twisted and tangled in the net.

“What a haul!” cried the fisherwoman. “Bring them in! Bring them in!”

“Ridge, get out of the jar! And muumuu!” The genie suddenly appeared, instantly taking the form of a shark. I went belly down, but there was a bigger problem.

Ridge was inside the net.

My shark thrashed, but this only seemed to delight the fisherwoman even more.

“Can’t you bite free?” I yelled.

“This is a fishing net!” he answered.

“So?”

“So, I’m a fish!” said Ridge. “This is designed to catch me!”

“Well, that turned out horribly!” Tina gasped as the bearded woman raked us toward the boat.

“How did Thackary get past this?” I cried, slapping the surface of the water. I had to assume he’d already accomplished the third task, or he and Jathon would still be nearby.

“Jathon must have wished for his dad to reach the bottom,” Tina said. “Nothing can stop the Universe from fulfilling that kind of direct wish.”

“Fine!” I yelled. “I wish to touch the bottom of Lake Michigan.” At saying the state name, the Universe made me do my best to jump. But jumping is hard when you are floating on your stomach in a fishing net with a shark on top of you.

“Okay,” said shark Ridge. “If you want to touch the bottom, then your breath will smell like fish until . . .”

“Until . . . ?”

“Until forever.”

I cringed. “What kind of fish? Are we talking salmon? Tuna? Halibut?”

Ridge shrugged with his front fins. “Just general fishiness.”

“Is there anything I can do to mask it?” I asked. “What if I brush my teeth?”

“Not going to help,” Ridge said. “Besides, a few days ago you took a consequence that makes your toothpaste taste like cauliflower.”

“Hmm.” I had forgotten about the toothpaste, even though it wouldn’t last. I had to complete the third task so I could catch up to Thackary Anderthon. That took priority over fresh breath.

“Bazang,” I said. Suddenly, the net disentangled itself from me and I was able to swim free. Now that I had made the direct wish to reach the bottom, the Universe would have to remove all obstacles from my path to fulfill that wish.

I transformed Ridge and called him back into the jar, turning once more to Tina, who was still struggling inside the fishing net. “You’re on your own this time.” Tina couldn’t mooch off my wish like she had done with the knife.

“Vale,” she called. “Get out of the jar.” The redheaded genie suddenly appeared in the net, getting soaked for the first time and gasping at the shock of the cold water.

“I wish to touch the bottom of Lake Michigan,” said Tina, causing me to jump at the name.

“Same wish as Ace?” Vale said. “I could hear you from the jar, you know.”

Tina shrugged. “We have to hurry. Being direct is the only way.”

Vale nodded. “It’s the same consequence.”

“The fish breath?” Tina asked. Vale nodded. “Bazang.”

The only reason I had stuck around to watch the exchange was because I needed a little bit of satisfaction in seeing Tina accept the same consequence that I had agreed to. Once I had received the reward of seeing her scowl, I took in a deep breath of fishy air and dove down.

The fishing lines were still there, slicing through the water with their giant hooks and demon worms, but they seemed to miss us. Twice, a fishing net pulled past us, but our wish had given us the assurance that we’d reach the bottom. Nothing could hold us back now.

It grew darker as we swam deeper. The pressure of the water was building around me and I thought my head might explode. I shut my eyes and continued diving, my fingers reaching out blindly before me.

I was seriously considering giving up and turning back, when at last, my hand plunged into a soft layer of silt that made up the lake bottom. I couldn’t see Tina in the darkness, but I had to trust she was close behind.

I ran my hand through the muddy lakebed, a few small slimy rocks slipping through my fingers. I had completed the third task, taking me one step closer to receiving the key to enter the Cave of the Undiscovered Genie.

I didn’t know how much time was left in my hour of breath, but it seemed like a good idea to get to the surface so I’d be ready to breathe air again. Kicking off the bottom of the lake, I streamed upward, finding this direction much easier than the dive.

When my head finally rose above the surface of the lake, the sun had just set and a cool wind whipped over the water. I had come up twenty or thirty yards from the red boat. In the dying light, I could see the bearded fisherwoman leaning against the railing.

Tina came up behind me, gasping and sputtering. “Did you touch the bottom?” she asked. I nodded, as the fisherwoman’s voice sounded across the water.

“You have completed the third task,” she called. “But before you seek the Cave of the Undiscovered Genie, I must warn you. He longs to breathe the free air, but his powers are fishy!”

“Ridge,” I said, “get out of the jar.” I wanted to be prepared if the guardian fisherwoman tried anything else. But just as Ridge appeared in a puff of smoke, the bearded woman slumped down on the deck of the red boat, as though suddenly fast asleep.

“Did you hear what she said?” Ridge asked.

“Yeah.” More ominous warnings about the Undiscovered Genie. More incentive to stop Thackary from opening his jar.

Tina swam closer to me, still gasping for breath from her long time underwater. I turned my face away from her. “I’d offer you a breath mint,” I said, “but it wouldn’t help.” And I didn’t actually have one.

Tina splashed water in my face. “Mind your own consequences,” she said. “You smell just like I do.”

I couldn’t help but laugh. And laughing should have made my socks wet. But guess what? They already were.

Ha! Take that, Universe.