“We could make like a golf club,” Max suggested.
“What?” Goofball asked.
“We could make like a golf club and drive.”
Goofball shook his head. “It’ll take too long. Flying is the only way.”
Calamity loved Max’s idea of making like a golf club, but making like an insect was faster. He just happened to hate insects. Tiger Woods, on the other hand, was his hero.
They went to the local airport and looked around. “How about that one?” Calamity pointed to a small red plane with the words BUBBA’S EXPERT CROP DUSTING written on the side.
“Perfect!” Goofball said. He turned to Max. “Do what you do best, Max.”
This meant, of course, that he should smack Bubba, the owner of the plane. Max did just that. One punch and Bubba was out cold.
“Let’s make like a tree and—”
“No time to make like anything,” Goofball said, running for the plane. “Let’s go!”
The three of them jumped into the plane, Calamity started it up, and then they took off into the wild blue. Yonder, that is.
* * *
Clankity–Whump–Pow–Thunk! While the bad guys were heading into the wild blue, Melvin and Candace were coming through a rough re-entry. They had forgotten to strap in, and it wasn’t at all pretty. In fact, it was pretty ugly.
They’d gone back in time, just as Goofball and Company had. But they still had to get to Boston, the location of the academy and the younger Melvin.
“Let’s go.” Melvin got to his feet and launched himself.
This is what he tried to do at least. It took him five tries after the usual Crash! Splat! Thud! Kabonk! He joined Candace in the air, who was keeping herself busy juggling tangerines she’d plucked from a nearby tree.
“Boston, here we come,” Melvin said. They streaked eastward across the sky. With any luck they’d get there before the bad guys.
Speaking of bad guys …
Goofball, Max, and Calamity were already several states across the country by now. But they were flying a beat-up old crop duster, while Melvin and Candace were zipping along at superhero speed.
Calamity spotted them in his rearview mirror. “Bad news, boys,” he said.
“Don’t tell me,” Max said. “We’re going to make like a Beederman and crash.”
“No, but funny you should mention him.” Calamity pointed behind him. “Superheroes at six o’clock!”
Sure enough, Melvin and Candace were coming up fast.
“Do something!” Goofball screamed.
“Do what?”
“Go faster!”
“I’m going as fast as I can.” It was true—he was. Melvin and Candace would be on them any second.
And then it happened. For the first time in his life, Calamity Wayne had an idea. A good idea. A whopper of an idea.
“Grab hold of something, boys. This is going to be tricky.” He pulled back on the steering, and the plane veered skyward and disappeared into a cloud.
“I can’t see a thing,” Goofball complained.
“Perfect!” Calamity said. “Melvin and Candace won’t be able to spot us.”
* * *
“Am I losing my mind?” Melvin asked Candace as they sped along.
“Most likely,” Candace said.
“No, I mean I thought I saw a red plane. It’s gone.”
“Oh. Yeah. I saw it, too.”
But now there was nothing. There was no plane at all. Except for the clouds above them, the sky was clear to the horizon. Melvin took off his glasses and cleaned them.
Suddenly a red propeller plane dropped out of the clouds. On the side was written BUBBA’S EXPERT CROP DUSTING. Before Melvin and Candace could react, the little red plane dusted them with a nasty-smelling chemical.
Melvin coughed. “Holy bug spray!”
Holy bug spray, indeed! It was almost as bad as bologna, Melvin’s real weakness.
Almost.
Somewhere over east Texas, Melvin and Candace fell from the sky.
“Aaaaaaahhhhhh!”
“Great shot!” said Goofball.
“Excellent,” Max added.
“Thanks.” Calamity kept the plane pointing east, toward Boston, toward the Superhero Academy and the young Melvin Beederman. Nothing could stop them now.