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The moment Kenneth said, “Go!” James realized he stood no chance against Kitty. She would win the race whether he allowed her to or not.
Instead of focusing on guiding his horse towards the hilltop, he glanced at Kitty more than he should have. A few moments after they started, Kitty’s long, onyx hair had somehow become undone and blew in the wind behind her like a velvet cape. It freed her from the societal norms he had been accustomed to, giving him goose bumps and shivers of delight as he watched her.
James’s horse started to trail behind, and he shook the reins and kicked the animal in the flanks. Soon the chestnut stallion caught up to Kitty’s white stallion, and raced side-by-side along the meadow, through the tall grass.
James could not recall the last time he had felt such freedom in his soul, and it was all thanks to Kitty. Before he’d met her, he had spent his life either beside his father or confined within the walls of his father’s life.
He had been raised to be the responsible son, the heir to his father’s title and the person who would represent and carry forth the family name and heritage to his offspring.
But somehow in this moment, watching Kitty’s horse race towards the hilltop placing a considerable amount of distance between them, his entire life seemed a waste.
All those tedious events, social gatherings, the mindless chatter, the predictable topics of conversation dulled in comparison to the feelings that pulsated through him.
Kitty was the first to reach the hilltop and she waited for James to reach her, wearing a proud smile on her beautiful face.
“I do believe congratulations are in order, my lady,” James said as he caught his breath. It did not appear that Kitty had even exerted herself. “Perhaps I am more out of practice than I initially thought.”
Kitty giggled and shook her head, her dark locks tumbling down her shoulders. “You did quite well, considering, Your Grace.”
“Considering that I am the Duke of Somerset, and I should be able to win a race with a beautiful maiden?” James inquired.
Kitty suppressed a flattered smile and glanced at the countryside around her. “There is no shame in losing to a woman, Your Grace.”
“I did not say there was, my lady,” James pointed out.
“You should not feel intimidated by me in any way,” Kitty said. “All people are not the same. We have different strengths and different weaknesses. We excel at different things. It is what makes us all unique. Not being able to win a race with a woman does not make you any less of a man, and you must never think such a thing, Your Grace.”
“I shall remember that, my lady,” James said gratefully and lowered his gaze.
“Tell me of your mother, Your Grace,” Kitty requested after a brief silence, and James glanced at her with utter confusion. “I wish to hear of your mother.”
“I do not often speak of my mother.”
“I have, indeed, noticed. Why is that?” Kitty asked.
“My father was an important man, an inspiring man, and most people admired him,” James answered, not sure why she was asking about his mother.
“With undeniable certainty, I can say that your mother was the true pillar of strength for your father.”
James sighed and nodded his head. “Indeed. My mother and father met and fell irrevocably in love. Their romance was something I had found rather unrealistic to believe. How can a person gaze upon someone, and without even knowing their name, fall in love? Even after all the years they were married, all the years my siblings and I watched them look upon one another in the same manner they always had, it still seemed like an illusion to me. People were under the impression they had the perfect marriage.”
“But you knew the truth?” Kitty asked.
“It is not what you think, my lady,” James answered. “They argued, of course, over important matters, especially when it came to my siblings and me. They were still happy, and they raised us with all the love they could possibly give. We grew up in a happy home. It was their love for one another that did not fade, which surprised me and made me think it was all for show.”
James paused and gazed out at the rolling hills below them. “On my mother’s deathbed, I asked her whether it was all a lie, a ruse to keep me believing there was such a thing as true love. Her words to me were that each of us was born as half a soul, and when we find the other half of our soul, we will instantly know. We feel complete with that person, even if it does not make sense to anyone else. She followed her heart, and it led her to a life with a wonderful man who loved her and gave her three beautiful children. It was not an easy road for my mother, as she had to endure whispers from my father’s family, who believed she was only marrying my father for his title.”
“But she truly loved him,” Kitty spoke softly, her voice filled with longing and emotion.
James struggled to continue through the pain in his chest, “Indeed, she did. She told me that very day. Even though their marriage was not perfect, the manner in which they brought out the best in one another was the perfection she had always wished for. It was the way that my father looked at her that made it perfect,” James answered, his heart suddenly aching for his mother and father.
He had lost them too soon and would give anything to have them alive and well. James had relied on their guidance too much, and now he was empty and lost.
Except when he was in the presence of Kitty.
The young lady gave James the strength to speak of his mother for the very first time since her death. He had not even spoken to his siblings about her loss, yet here he was, pouring his heart out to a woman he had only met one day prior.
The woman whom he was set to marry.
Although it may seem odd to some, James felt comfortable in her presence, and he had received no judgment from her, even when he admitted to her that he was uncertain of how to process and exhibit for a person.
Kitty’s understanding nods and gestures gave James hope that he was not a heartless and foolish man, but rather a human being who simply required some understanding.
“That does, indeed, sound as perfect a marriage as any woman could wish for,” Kitty sighed dreamily, but a certain hint of sadness was present in her eyes.
James stared intently at her. “I apologize, my lady,” James said, surprised he said the words aloud. He had not intended to speak aloud, but they formed on his lips before he could suppress them. “For denying you the privilege of experiencing that kind of life.”
Kitty, who appeared wise beyond her years as she sat on the back of the snow-white stallion, gazed out into the distance, straightened her shoulders and glanced at James. “Things could have been much worse, Your Grace.”
“What do you mean?” James inquired.
“You could have been old, unattractive, uninteresting, and difficult to speak with,” Kitty answered and shrugged her shoulders. “But luckily you are none of those things.”
“You flatter me unnecessarily, my lady,” James said as he lowered his gaze.
Although Kitty’s words were complimentary, he still felt guilty for uprooting her against her will. James wished for her to be happy here at the estate, and with him, which meant he would have to reveal his feelings for her, even if it was at the risk of being rejected.
James opened his mouth then sighed, deciding it would have to wait, as he was happy with the way things were currently between Kitty and him. He most certainly did not wish for things to change.
“Your Grace, forgive me for being frank, but you are not at all what I expected,” Kitty admitted with a slight cringe. “I am not particularly picky when it comes to men, but I most certainly have an idea of what a man should be to grab my attention.”
“I share your dilemma. I carry an image around in my mind of the type of woman whom I would wish to have,” James agreed.
“Have you ever found that woman?” she asked.
James lifted his chin and gazed out at the horizon. “I thought I had once before, but she was not who I thought she was.”
Kitty raised her brow expectantly. “That sounds rather intriguing. Do tell.”
“Oh, no. It is a tragic and embarrassing tale, and most certainly not fit for your ears, especially not now,” James scoffed.
“Spare me the pedantry, Your Grace. You and I should not have any secrets between us,” Kitty said coyly.
James turned his attention back to Kitty and sighed. “My lady, I would rather wedge a sword in my gut than share the details of someone who does not carry any significance in my life. Also, I do not wish to spoil the lovely time we had spent together with such banalities.”
Kitty pursed her lips and nodded slowly. “I understand, Your Grace. Now is not the time, but I will certainly manage to find out, even if it means to be with malt above water with you?”
“Do not throw a rub in the ways, my lady,” James chuckled. “You are a woman of virtue, and would certainly not attempt such a thing.”
“Perhaps,” Kitty chuckled.
A happy and amused smile formed on James’s lips as he gazed upon Kitty.
She was precisely the woman whom he would gladly spend the rest of his life alongside, whether she loved him in return or not. It was a difficult situation, as the more he spent time with Kitty, the more he wished to be with her, but he also did not wish for her to be unhappy with him.
Perhaps it was much too soon to say and of course, only time would tell, but James knew that no one else would be good enough for him after Kitty’s presence in his life, as she was not only a tempting armful, she was a truly outstanding female.