CHAPTER 17

The cab, when it pulled up in front of the coffee shop, was the wrong color. It was white, not yellow like cabs are supposed to be. That bothered me for some reason, but I got in anyway, with my backpack over one shoulder and a full black trash bag in my arms. It was awkward, climbing in.

I wished I could have said something to Gran and Lew at the house before I left. I’d have liked to have given them each a hug. Instead I’d snuck in and out as fast as I could, because I didn’t want anyone to ask about the trash bag. In it were all the stolen goods. The TV and the iPod and the dead phone and the clothes and even the diamond. Everything except the things I’d given to Lew. And the spoon. That was in my backpack. Mom’s charger I left in her room, on the floor, in hopes she’d assume she’d dropped it there.

“Where to?” asked the cabbie, turning his head to look back at me. He had an accent, but I could understand him easily enough. The music that played softly reminded me of my dad’s favorite Indian restaurant. It made me feel hungry. Or maybe I was just nervous.

“I need to go to Clarkston,” I said, dumping my backpack and the garbage bag beside me on the seat. “Will that be a lot of money?” The car smelled like smoke, even though there was a NO SMOKING sign on the window. “Clarkston, Georgia?” I wanted to make sure I had enough money.

The cabbie laughed. “Everything is far in Atlanta, but nothing is too far if you’ve got the correct amount of money. Maybe ten or fifteen minutes, depending. May I ask what is the exact address, please?” He was a very polite cabbie.

I opened the hand that held my tiny scrap of paper and read the address to him, even though I pretty much had it memorized.

“We will be there in no time.” He nodded. “But first I must ask: Do your parents know where you are? It’s unusual to pick up a fare so young in front of a coffee shop.” He eyed my bag curiously. “You are not running away or anything?” He looked concerned.

“No,” I said with a laugh, hoping I sounded normal. “My mom and dad know I’m here. They told me to call a cab. We’re staying with my grandmother, a few streets over, on Woodland.” I wasn’t sure if I should be telling him where Gran lived, but he didn’t seem creepy or anything.

The cabbie still didn’t start the car. He sat there and looked at me. “May I ask—how old are you?”

“I’m thirteen,” I said without blinking. I thought thirteen sounded a lot older than twelve. “I’m going to see my mom at her friend’s house. My dad said to call a cab. He was busy.” I was talking too much and I knew it. Less is more.

The cabbie squinted one eye at me for a minute. But at last he turned around and started the car.

I stared at the back of his head and said, “Hey, is there a Goodwill or anything on the way there? A Salvation Army? I need to drop this bag off if I can. Just some old stuff.”

The cabbie looked back over his shoulder and eyed my bag again. “Yes,” he said with a short nod. “There are several of them, actually. We can stop, no problem.” Then he began to whistle along with the music.

He was a nice-enough-looking guy, baldish and smiley, with thick glasses and dark skin. His top half was a skinny person’s top, and his bottom half, I couldn’t help noticing when I leaned over the seat to talk to him, was a fat person’s bottom. I wondered if maybe that just happened to people who sat down all day every day.

I watched the meter as the car began to move down the street, cruising slowly over the speed bumps. For a while we were driving on familiar roads, the same little streets I’d been walking along with Lew for the last month. Then we turned onto a bigger road and cruised along past vacant buildings and construction projects before pulling into a cracked parking lot with a big red metal box in it that read DONATIONS, a kind of oversized mailbox.

It wasn’t quite what I’d envisioned. I guess maybe I’d been hoping some nice old lady would “ooh” and “aah” over my wonderful gifts to the poor, make me feel generous and helpful, but the big metal box was what I had instead, so I opened it up. The door made a clanging, creaking sound as it opened. I pushed the huge bag into the yawning mouth of the box and let the door fall shut with a bang. I opened the door one more time and peered in. It was empty.

Good. All my ill-gotten goods were gone. I could never get them back, and I felt immediately relieved. I guess sometimes when you can’t exactly fix a problem, you can at least discard it. I’d never thought about that before.

I climbed back into the cab. “Okay,” I said. “Now Clarkston?”

“Onward to Clarkston,” said the cabbie, and the car began to move again.

We passed empty strip malls, huge vacant lots, and gray apartment buildings. We passed a bunch of people standing around. This was not a pretty neighborhood.

At last I relaxed and sat back against an ancient leather cushion that was held together with silver duct tape. I thought about what I was doing, where I was going. Now that I was headed in what I supposed was the right direction, I realized exactly what I’d done. I was in a cab, alone, at the age of twelve, heading to a complete stranger’s house, in a part of town I’d never been to, in a city I didn’t really know. I wasn’t sure who I’d find when I got where I was going, or what, really, I’d say to them. But I had to admit that it was an adventure. I was certainly doing something.

I stared out the window at the world rushing past me. Trees and trees and so much green for such a big city, but all of it covered in litter and growing up through cracked cement. Everything I saw seemed to be either a blown-out old building, surrounded by barbed-wire fences and parking lots, or a lush green forest. What a weird place Atlanta was.

We shot along that wide road, and I found myself thinking about how I’d never read a book or seen a movie where a kid took off on an adventure all alone. Wasn’t there always a friend or a sister or something? A helpful grown-up or at least a smart dog? I didn’t even have a dog.

I wished someone else were with me. If all this had happened at home, I guess Mary Kate would have come too, maybe. Then again, all this wouldn’t have happened at home.

If I’d waited a few weeks, maybe Megan and I would really have become friends, and she would have come with me. Or maybe she wouldn’t have. It was hard to tell. I missed Lew.

The cab made a few turns, onto other wide streets. The neighborhood got prettier and fancier, with shops and things, but then, suddenly, we were driving alongside a railroad track, and it looked like we were in the country. There were little wooden houses and a few funny-looking junky antique stores. There was an old-fashioned gas station that looked abandoned. Were we still in Atlanta?

Then we were on a side street, and just as we were turning into the driveway of an old house, three hungry-looking stray dogs ran past us. The cab came to a stop. The meter said I owed the cabbie twelve dollars. I gave him a twenty. “Keep the change,” I said.

He looked surprised.

“My dad used to drive a cab,” I explained. It made me feel proud to say that, which was funny, since Mom had always seemed embarrassed of the fact.

“Used to?”

“He wrecked it,” I said, realizing the cabbie now knew more about my dad than anyone else I’d met in Atlanta.

“That’s too bad,” he said.

“Yeah, it is,” I said. For some reason I was having trouble getting out of the cab.

The cabbie looked at me and smiled kindly. “You want for me to wait here until you get inside?”

“Um, no, that’s okay,” I said, opening the door. “I might have to wait for them awhile or something. It’ll be fine. Don’t worry.”

The cabbie shrugged. “If you say so.”

I got out of the car and took a deep breath. I slammed the door behind me. I watched the car pull away. There was no going back.

I faced the house, a dingy brick box with dark orange trim. I held my breath as I walked up the concrete steps. At the top, I found a porch that was covered—completely covered—in plants.

Dead ones.

I was alone, all alone. I’d been feeling alone for weeks, but I hadn’t really been alone, had I? Not until now, not really. I’d had Gran and Mom—even when I didn’t want her—and Lew at least nearby. Now … they were all very far away.

What was I supposed to say? Did I just knock on the door and hand over the spoon? Then what? Turn around and go home? How? I hadn’t thought about that. Maybe I should have asked the cabbie to stick around after all.