Alice drove, her heart left back at the inn in Knox’s pocket. She adjusted Knox’s pilfered hat and tried to channel his calm energy. Failing, she turned onto Lake Drive, heading for 80 before she had to face the question.
Okay, two big questions.
One, why hadn’t she put the top back on Stella, or grabbed her jacket from her duffel bag in the back, because it was maybe forty-five degrees with a storm brewing and she was already half frozen to death?
And question number two . . .
Where was she going?
Was she really going to run away like she’d been doing for most of her life, and certainly all of her dubious “adult” life? She hated the idea of that, hated what it said about her as a business partner, as a friend, as a human being. After all, she had an obligation now to the inn and her partners. But more than that, she cared too much about those partners to do this to them.
But. If she didn’t run, she’d have to face the elephant sitting on her chest, and once she let those emotions loose, she wasn’t sure she could ever bottle them back up again.
So she kept driving. The lake was churning like the sea beneath the turbulent sky that matched her mood. And then suddenly Stella coughed and sputtered, making Alice’s pulse skip a beat. Sure, Stella had been around the block a time or a hundred, but Alice had just given her a bunch of TLC.
Stella sputtered again.
“No, no, no, no, not now,” she murmured, stroking the dash. “Baby, this isn’t a good time. I’m in the middle of falling apart, so I need you to hold it together. Is it the oil? I had to give you a different brand because the store was out of our usual, but I swear it came highly rated.”
Another sputter, and she knew.
It wasn’t the oil. It was Alice. She’d once again forgotten to put gas in the tank. Talk about sabotaging herself. What was wrong with her? Probably too many things to name at this point. “But why? Why would I do this to us?”
Stella didn’t have a response to that. Not that it mattered. Because deep down Alice knew what was wrong with her. In this case, she was the big, fat chicken who made a regular habit of screwing up her life. She was simply bailing before anyone could bail on her.
When Stella died, Alice managed to steer off the road. But thanks to no emergency lane and a steep slant leading directly into a ditch, she had to angle in, her front end up to a line of trees, bending to the wind’s will.
The lake was on her left. Nothing but woods on her right that she knew would lead her to gorgeous trails, but no civilization. It was at least a mile to the closest gas station, maybe more. Leaning back, she stared up at the sky. “Do you think this is funny?” she asked. When no one answered, she blew out a sigh, pulled her phone from her pocket, and stared at it. She could call Lauren, and she would come. But she’d bring more questions than Alice had answers for.
Who else?
She knew who else. The man who she didn’t want to admit owned her entire heart. Her entirely broken heart.
Well, whose fault is that . . . ?
She never should’ve come back. This place had wrecked her once and she’d barely survived. Why had she expected this time to be any different? And this time it just might kill her, though clearly, before she died, she was going to have to pump gas.
She drew a deep breath and tried to figure out what her heart wanted.
Run.
Okay, so that wasn’t a surprise. It’d been silenced for so long that now, when she’d finally lowered her walls, the poor organ actually thought it was in charge. But shouldn’t important life decisions be made by the brain?
Naturally, her brain chose that moment to be silent.
What does your gut say? Knox had asked her. Well, her gut said she was an idiot. Letting her head fall back on the headrest, she closed her eyes. She’d made both Lauren and Knox think that her leaving was all their fault. Who did that to the people they loved?
So this was what rock bottom felt like. But the joke was on her, because she felt the first drop of something icy cold hit her face. And then another. Opening her eyes, she watched snowflakes begin to fall from the sky in slow motion. “You’ve got to be kidding me.”
The words weren’t even all the way out of her mouth when the sky opened up. She was still sitting there swearing the air blue when a dark gray truck angled in to park directly behind her, blocking her in.
Knox got out of the truck, followed by Pickle. She watched the man and his dog approach in her side-view mirror, annoyed that the warning printed on the mirror—OBJECTS IN MIRROR ARE CLOSER THAN THEY APPEAR—was not true, because in a single blink Knox was at her door; big, solid, sexy as hell, his expression dialed to unhappy.
Join my club . . .
Something bubbled in her belly. Nerves? Oh, yeah. But it was something else as well. A teeny tiny itty little bit of . . . hope? He’d come after her. No one had ever done that, not even Lauren.
But you’re mad at him, that self-destructive voice deep inside her whispered. Yes. Yes, she was. Very mad. Only . . . deep deep down she knew the truth—that Knox had done absolutely nothing wrong. He’d made something of himself, become successful, and she was thrilled for him. So why was she so upset?
Because you’re scared.
Ding, ding, ding, we have a winner . . .
Knox stood at her door, Pickle sitting sweetly at his feet, blinking up at her through the falling snow. Alice’s window was rolled up, but with the top off, it didn’t much matter. Knox met her gaze, his own solemn as he carefully looked her over, like he was making sure she was okay. “Nice day to hang outside,” he said, getting dusted with snow as he lived and breathed.
“How did you find me?”
“It’s one road in and one road out. I guess for the first time ever, I was hoping you’d run out of gas.”
She sank in her seat a little bit. “I used to be unpredictable. Mysterious.”
“If it helps, you’re still a complete mystery to me.” He opened the back door. “Up,” he said.
Pickle jumped into the back and sat politely, then proceeded to tip his head back and play at catching snowflakes as they came down around him, his jaws snapping audibly as he amused himself. Snap, snap, snap . . .
Knox went back to his truck and reappeared carrying a gas can, no doubt full.
She tried—and failed—to ignore the little flutter that gave her.
Setting the can down near her tank, he came back to her. He opened the driver’s door, then crouched at her side, easily balancing on the balls of his feet. “Ready for that talk yet?”
“I’m pretty busy having an existential crisis.”
His mouth twitched, but he didn’t smile. He wasn’t going to let her joke this away.
And he also deserved better. Way better. “Look,” she said. “I’m sorry. Your financial affairs are none of my business. It wasn’t your problem to bail me out. I, um . . .” She looked away. “I used that ridiculous excuse to run like hell. Out of fear.”
Snap, went Pickle’s jaws. Snap. Snap. Snap.
Knox’s expression didn’t change. Nor did he move a single inch, but Alice could feel how much he hated what she’d revealed. “You’re afraid of me,” he finally said softly, almost as if to himself.
“Of what you make me feel.” She adjusted his hat low over her eyes. “I know that people think I’m so tough, but I’m not. I’m a big faker. I mean, look what happened when I was faced with real emotions. The first chance I got, I lashed out and pushed you away. Lauren too.” She swallowed hard. “You both deserve better, and I’m sorry. I’m sorry about a lot of things. Being back here stirred up all sorts of bad stuff, and I let it all get mixed up with the now. Which is dumb, I know, but so was making a bunch of stupid promises to myself about not letting myself get involved so that I couldn’t screw anything up. But then that’s exactly what I did, so—”
He readjusted the hat so he could see her eyes and then gently set a finger to her lips. She nearly collapsed in gratitude because she’d probably have kept babbling forever.
“You haven’t screwed anything up,” he said.
She gave him a get-real look. “I screwed everything up. Me and Lauren. The car inventory that I let sit because it paralyzed me, which is basically like taking money from both of you. Eleanor would be so disappointed in me.” She paused. “And then there’s the biggie.”
“The biggie?”
Damn. He wanted her to say it. “Me and you . . .”
Knox just looked at her for a long beat. “First, you and Lauren are going to be okay.”
She sucked in a breath, hoping that was true. “And second?”
“The inventory will still be there whenever you’re ready. Or if you decide you’re never going to get there, we’ll figure something else out, the three of us. Also, Eleanor always had faith in you. You won’t disappoint her.”
She stared at him, wanting to believe. But it sounded too easy. Plus, there was one thing left, and there would be nothing easy about it. “And the me and you thing?” she whispered.
Snap. Snap. Snap . . .
“Pickle,” Knox said.
The dog gave a sigh, then turned in a circle three times, plopped onto the seat, and closed his eyes.
Knox hadn’t taken his eyes off Alice. “As for you and me . . . I’m right here.”
“But?” she whispered, because there was always a but.
“No buts, not between you and me,” he said, eyes still very serious. “We’re just talking. And then after, if you still want to go, you’ll go. I want you to be happy, Alice. As for what you might want, whatever it is, please know it’s of the utmost importance to me.”
She hadn’t had a warm fuzzy in years and years, but she got one now, all the way down to her toes.
“I’m sorry you felt blindsided by what you saw on my laptop,” he said. “I wasn’t trying to hide it from you.”
She grimaced. “I know. And it doesn’t matter. Again, not your problem.”
“No, but I still could’ve told you.” He drew a deep breath. “The truth is, I didn’t because I didn’t want you to leave. But if you still want to, I’ll deal with it and try to understand. I meant what I said, Alice. I want you to be happy, whatever that looks like for you. Will you tell me what you want?”
She turned to fully face him where he was still crouched at her door, her knees bumping his chest. She found the contact comforting. “I want a partner who’s in the trenches with me. Someone I can let my guard down with. Someone who doesn’t see that as me being weak.”
“Tumbleweed, there’s nothing weak about you.”
She gave a slow head shake. “We both know that isn’t true. Honesty, right? That’s one of our things? So here’s my truth—I want to learn how to stop running away when I get scared.”
He reached for her hand and squeezed gently. He wasn’t quite as calm as he’d like her to believe. There was a tension in every line of his body, and his mouth was set in a grim line. “I get that,” he said, then almost smiled at her surprise. “You think you’re the only one who gets scared?”
“I scare you?” she asked, incredulous.
“Hell, yeah you do. When you left, I was afraid I’d never feel happy again.” He drew a deep breath. “Alice . . . what does your gut say?”
Shockingly, she found a smile. Because yeah, her heart and her brain led with fear, but her gut didn’t have an ounce of it. “It says I should stay. I mean, you do make a mean breakfast, so . . .”
That finally got her a small smile. “Do you need a bribe?” He pushed her wet hair from her face. “Because I’m not above it. I’ll vow right here right now to make you breakfast every day of the week for the rest of your life. I love you, Alice. I’m in love with you. I’m never going to stop loving you and thinking about you, wherever you live. I choose you, and if you let me, I’d spend the rest of my life proving it to you.”
She was pretty sure her mouth was hanging open because she could taste the snow. It was coming down in thick white lines now, covering them both. It was sitting on Knox’s hair and shoulders, and yet he remained still. He had to be cold. He was wearing only a T-shirt and jeans, like maybe he’d come after her so fast he hadn’t thought to grab a jacket for himself. She slid over into the passenger seat.
Knox got in behind the wheel, the snow still drifting down on them. He tugged her hand, getting her to come back and right into his lap. “Whatever you want, Alice.”
And he would give it. It both humbled and thrilled her to the core. She cupped his jaw. “As long as you let me prove to you that you are enough, exactly as is.”
He let out a breath. “You could prove that with the next three words that you say.”
She grinned. “You. Are. Enough.”
His gaze didn’t waver. Still not playing.
“A relationship with me will be hard,” she said softly. “I’m no picnic.”
He dropped his head to her shoulder, then turned his face to kiss her neck. “I don’t know about that. You sure taste good.”
With a quiet laugh, she adjusted herself so that she was straddling him, then wound her arms around him. “When I first got here, I was scared to see you again, so scared to let my secret crush on you renew itself, because I knew of all the people I’ve ever met and pushed away, that you were different, that I couldn’t scare you off or pretend not to feel things for you.” She drew a deep breath. “I love you, Knox. So much. I think I’ve been waiting to tell you that for just about my whole life.”
She didn’t know what she expected his reply to be, but it wasn’t for his eyes to remain incredibly intense as he nodded. “Then you should know something.”
Oh, God. She started to climb off him, but changed her mind. Nope. Hell no. She wasn’t going to run. For once, she was going to go toe to toe with him and hold her own. “What?”
“You live your life unapologetically. You’re fierce and passionate and incredible, and the way you look at me . . .” He shook his head, looking marveled. “It humbles and surprises me every time. You’re everything to me, Alice. I can only hope to be the same for you.”
Relief had her collapsing like a balloon against him. “Are you kidding me? You’re everything to me too, and more than enough for me. You’re so much that I can hardly take all of you.”
He snorted, and she felt heat warm her cold face as she pressed it to the crook of his neck. “I didn’t mean it like that.”
“How did you mean it?”
She lifted her head and held on to the rest of her life by fisting her hands in his wet shirt. “You’re going to make me say it?”
“Damn straight I am.”
She looked him right in the eyes as she gave him a soft kiss, then pulled back slightly. “You’re the best thing that’s ever happened to me. I promise to stop running, Knox.”
He kissed her gently, tenderly. “How about this instead—if the urge hits, I’ll run with you.” He cupped her face, held her gaze. “You are the most important person in my life, Alice.”
As she glowed with that, a Nissan LEAF pulled off the road and parked behind Knox’s truck.
Alice’s stomach dropped.
Lauren got out of her car and, hugging her jacket close to her body with one hand, the other holding her hood up, ran toward them. “I knew you’d be out of gas.”
Alice drew a deep breath, not sure how to fix things, only knowing she had to try. She knew that what Lauren had done hadn’t been to purposely hurt her. Unlike what Alice had done.
Knox reached around Alice and opened the passenger door for Lauren. Climbing in, Lauren shut the door, then let her head fall back. “Oh. My. God.”
“I know,” Alice said. “Crazy storm.”
“I meant you!” Lauren reached over and hugged Alice tightly, clearly not minding at all that Alice was still in Knox’s lap. “I want you to know if I get any new gray hairs from today, even a single one, you’re paying for my next set of highlights.”
“Done,” Alice said into Lauren’s hair because Lauren hadn’t let go. In fact, her hold on Alice was strangling. She tried giving Lauren a little pat on the back.
The woman still didn’t let go. “And . . . ?” Lauren demanded.
Alice took a deep breath. “And I’m in love with your other business partner.”
Lauren rolled her eyes. “Well, duh. I knew before either of you two knew, but even if I’d somehow managed to miss the long looks and sizzling chemistry hot enough to light up all of Tahoe, you sitting on his lap in a car without a lid in a storm is clue enough. But that’s not what I meant, by the way. I was asking why the hell we’re sitting in your car without a lid in a storm.”
“Because I’m a slow learner,” Alice said. “Lauren, I’m so sorry—”
“Stop!” Lauren commanded, and Alice froze.
“Me first.” Lauren pulled something from her pocket—an antique gold diamond ring, which she handed to Alice.
Her grandma’s, and overcome at having a tangible reminder of the family that once was, Alice closed her fingers around it and brought her hand to her heart.
“It was in the box the attorney sent me,” Lauren said softly. “I was always going to give it to you, I just didn’t know how.”
“It’s okay. I understand. I made things harder than they needed to be. I’m sorry for leaving the way I did. I never meant to hurt you.” She drew a deep breath for courage. “I meant to stay in touch more. I wanted to. You were . . . you are so important to me, Lauren.”
Lauren was slapping her pockets, clearly looking for a tissue, muttering about having something in her eye.
Knox hauled out some napkins from a stack he had tucked into the pocket of the driver’s door. Alice took them and handed them to Lauren. “Please don’t cry, Lauren.”
Lauren blew her nose. “It’s a good kind of cry.”
“There’s a good kind of cry?” Alice asked Knox.
Knox shrugged. “Apparently?”
Alice drew a deep breath for courage. “I talked myself into the idea that I didn’t need love in my life. I mean, all it ever seemed to do was hurt me. I didn’t realize until I came back here how wrong I was. My life is better off for being loved by you, Lauren.”
“Oh my God, and now you’re flinging the L-word around.” Lauren hugged her again, hard.
“Did you just wipe snot and mascara on me?” Alice asked.
“Maybe. Just a little. But I love you too. I’m so sorry I didn’t tell you about Will’s proposal. I was afraid you’d be mad at me for breaking your brother’s heart. Just because he wasn’t a good fit for me doesn’t mean I didn’t care about him, because I did.”
Alice believed that. “Maybe we both agree to agree that we were both young and dumb, and move on.”
“No.” Lauren shook her head. “Not if it means you’re still leaving.”
“You know I was always going to leave,” Alice reminded her gently. “But . . .”
“You’d better tell me that but involves you changing your mind, or I’ll cry buckets, I swear it, and make you cry buckets too, and—”
“I’m changing my mind,” Alice said quickly. Yes, she’d come to Sunrise Cove with the goal of getting in and back out as soon as possible. But somewhere along the line, that need had changed. And at the end of the day, the Last Chance Inn was the only place to ever feel like home to her. But it was more than that. She wanted Lauren in her life.
And Knox.
She wanted it all. “I’m staying.”
“You’re staying,” Lauren repeated, staring at Alice as if she didn’t trust her own ears. “Is it at all possible for you to, I don’t know, maybe use more words faster?”
Alice took Lauren’s hand in hers, but it was Knox’s eyes she looked into, Knox who’d gone still as stone beneath her. “I came here and found what I didn’t even know I was looking for. Forgiveness. Acceptance. Self-worth. Love.” She paused. “Family.”
Lauren let out a breath and nodded. “Me too,” she whispered.
“We have Eleanor to thank for that,” Alice said.
Knox didn’t look surprised at the revelation. Clearly, he’d gotten there first. “I think she knew exactly what she was doing.”
“Agreed. She masterminded the whole thing,” Alice said. “We were her second chance, just like she’s ours.” And how she missed the old broad. “The truth is, I can’t walk away. I mean, okay, so I tried,” she said, gesturing at Stella. “But it turns out that I can’t, because I want to stick for once. I want to be here, with you guys. I know you’re going to build a business here in Tahoe,” she said to Knox, then turned to Lauren. “And you’re going to run the inn. You both have your lives sorted out.” She hesitated because this was a hard admittance. “But I don’t, not even close. You need to know that going in.”
“Oh, we do,” Lauren said dryly enough to make Alice laugh.
Alice squeezed Lauren’s hand and with her other, reached for Knox’s. “I didn’t know where my place was.” She gave a small smile. “But I know now. It’s with you both. I want to stay, and while Lauren manages the inn, I’d like to manage the actual property. Fix up the TV sets. The barn. The cars in the barn. We can sell some and keep others, like the ones that have ties to the TV show. Maybe we can renovate to what it looked like back in the day, go all wild, Wild West, you know? Use it to enhance and expand our guests’ experience. And then, when I’m finished with all that . . .” Be brave. Say it. “I want to open my own mechanic’s shop.” At that, she forced herself to shut up and take in their reactions, so she would know if this could really be her future.
Lauren was working her way through the stack of napkins. “Happy tears,” she cried, waving a hand in front of her face. “I promise!”
Knox cupped Alice’s face and pulled her closer, pressing his forehead to hers. “I can’t think of anything I’d love to see more.”
“Well, me, right?” she quipped.
He smiled. “Always.”
“Always,” she repeated softly.
“You know what we need now?” Lauren asked. “Food.” She pointed at Alice. “You’re buying.” She got out of Stella, then poked her head back in to look at Knox. “Oh, and your dog did number two in the front yard. If he wants to be our mascot, he needs manners.”
In the backseat, Pickle tried to look guilty, but he didn’t have it in him.
“I’ll get it,” Knox promised.
An hour later, they were all in the living room of the inn, in front of a roaring fire, eating takeout. They sat in comfortable silence for a while, looking into the fire. Alice felt herself drift, the crackling of the fire lulling her into relaxing. She looked around at her two favorite people and her favorite dog and her favorite inn, and felt so incredibly proud. Lauren had her eyes closed, maybe asleep, maybe just enjoying herself as Alice was. She glanced at Knox and found him watching her. “Hey.”
He smiled. “Hey.”
“Thanks for . . .” Loving me like no one else ever has. “Letting me in.”
Catching her hand, he gently drew it up to his chest. “It was about time.”
“No kidding,” Lauren murmured and opened her eyes just so she could roll them.
Alice snorted. Standing, she walked over to the wall and lifted the last piece of beadboard and set it in place.
Hiding their lists.
She nailed it in, and when she turned, Knox and Lauren were right there. “To us,” Lauren said.
“To us,” Knox repeated.
Alice smiled, feeling more at home and more herself than she’d ever felt before as the last piece of her heart fell into place.