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IVY
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THE PAST FOUR MONTHS have dragged by. I know he had to go back and finish up his tour, but none of us wanted him to leave. The kids drew him pictures to take with him, and while they were sad to see him go, and they didn’t want him to leave, they have done great with him being gone. I’m sure watching Daddy on TV helps, and they have every one of his movies memorized by heart.
Today, I am walking past that familiar newsstand again and making my way up to Ivy Hill, September 17, 1966. I give my name to the guard, and he calls Clint to verify it’s me.
“Ivy, we have an interesting visitor today.” He hugs me and guides me inside.
“Interesting how?”
“Anna showed up out of the blue with his son.”
“What does she want?”
“We don’t know yet. Supposedly out of the goodness of her heart, she thought to stop by since she was in the area and let David see his son she has been keeping from him for the last year.”
“Right. Well, I will take your lead. Do I go in and be friendly, do I go in and be a bitch, or do I go shopping and come back in a few hours?”
Clint laughs. “Ivy, if David finds out I sent you shopping, he will have my head. No, no, let's get you in there.”
I stop at the kitchen door. This is the first time I have been back since Helen died. The last time I walked in that door, she wrapped me in a huge hug and was so happy to see me. I should have been here to say goodbye, to hug her one more time, to hear her laugh at the dinner table, and watch her smile so big when we rave over a new recipe she tried out.
I should have been here for James and David. I should have been by their side at her funeral and the wake. I should have been here, and I wasn’t. I’m kicking myself even more for that, and I don’t think I realized how guilty I truly felt until now.
I know David has forgiven me, but will James? I could have warned him it was his last night with her so he could have spent every second holding her and telling her how much he loves her. Can he ever forgive me for that?
I guess I hesitate long enough because Clint breaks me from my thoughts.
“What’s wrong, Miss Ivy?”
“I should have been here, Clint. When Helen died, I should have been here.”
“It was a sad day, but you will see they are doing well. We all are.”
With a nod and a deep breath, I step into the kitchen as tears fill my eyes. It isn’t the same to see James sitting at the bar without Helen. He looks older and sadder, but he still manages a huge smile for me and comes over to hug me.
The moment I’m in his arms, I burst out crying. “I’m so sorry I mixed up the dates. I should have been here.”
“Oh Ivy, David came back, and we talked. It’s okay, and honestly, I’m glad I didn’t know. It would have been so much more painful for me to know. This way, I know she didn’t suffer, and while it was hard, we are doing well on this side.”
His words don’t stop the tears from falling. But he holds me tight until they stop. He kisses my forehead and smiles.
“Now, I’m glad you’re here. Did Clint tell you who made a surprise visit today?”
I sigh. “Yes. I don’t know what her agenda is, but I guess I’m about to find out.”
James holds up his finger and goes to pour me a glass of wine.
I laugh. “If I’m still in there in an hour, send in something stronger.”
I make my way to the living room and poke my head in to see his son Scott sitting on the floor playing with some toys, and Anna sitting next to David on the couch. I can’t hear what they are saying, but Anna is leaning in, and David looks uncomfortable and is leaning away from her. I smile and head back to the kitchen and get a questioning look from James.
“Let me get a drink for David. From the looks of things, he needs it more than I do.” James pours me a drink, and I walk into the living room, not even caring what conversation I am interrupting. David sees me, and his face lights up. He jumps up and rushes over to hug me.
I laugh and hand him the drink. “I was expecting you earlier this morning.” David gives a fake pout that makes me laugh.
“Sorry. Kevin got home from a delivery and was telling us about it, and we lost track of time.”
“David, we aren’t done talking,” Anna whines, and it makes my skin crawl. Judging by the look on David’s face, it makes his skin crawl too.
“It is anything important?” I whisper.
“She is trying to set up times for Scott to stay with me while she visits her friends back in France.”
I nod just as Anna stands up and comes over and tries to grab David’s arm, which he yanks away and wraps around my waist.
“Sorry, Ivy, but we have parental business to talk about.”
I roll my eyes at her and walk over to Scott.
“Hello, I’m Ivy,” I introduce myself.
“I’m this many.” He holds up four fingers.
“No way! My son Adam is five!”
I smirk because I see Anna catches on right away when her jaw drops, and David smiles.
“You know I was told there is a waterfall here, that true?”
“Yes, it’s in the back room!”
“No way! Can you show me so your mom and dad can talk?”
He jumps up and picks up his toys and heads out of the room but stops to look at me.
“Follow me!”
I laugh and follow him, giving David a wink before I leave the room and hear him mumble as I walk by, “Evil woman.” He knows what I did.
“Look right there!” he points.
“Wow, I’ve never seen a waterfall in a house before. It’s so cool!”
“Yeah, my dad’s house is the bestest house I’ve ever seen, but my mommy doesn’t let me come here much.”
I’m sad for this little boy, but I know it’s time to change the subject.
“Will you show me your tractor?” I ask as James comes to sit on the couch and watch us play.
A little bit into playing, I find myself humming the tune of “John Deere Green” without realizing it.
“What song is that?” Scott asks.
“Oh, it’s one that stuck in my head.”
“Sometimes, if I sing a song, it gets unstuck.”
I look at James, and he knows I’ve been caught. This song is one that was popular when I was growing up and not around yet.
Knowing this little boy has a long list of people who disappoint him over the years and not wanting to be one of them, I start softly singing the song for him. He picks it up pretty fast, and by the time David and Anna join us, he is singing the chorus pretty well.
Anna doesn’t look too happy, and she snaps when she sees Scott and me laughing.
“It’s time to go.”
He jumps up and runs over to hug me.
“Thank you for playing with me, Miss Ivy.”
Knowing I can give this little boy a small ray of hope, I whisper in his ear, “Things will get better once you’re an adult. Don’t forget that.”
He looks at me with a confused look on his face, so I hold my finger to my lips, showing him it’s a secret, and he smiles and nods.
He hugs James and David before running out after his mom.
“Well, isn’t she a ray of sunshine,” James says as David collapses on to the couch next to him. I get up and sit on his lap.
“I think the trip to France was just an excuse to come here because she knows no dates, and she kept saying I should take her out to dinner to talk about it and let Dad watch Scott.”
“She wants to be seen with you so she can sell a story,” I say. “Promise me you won’t ever drink anything she gives you. I have a weird feeling she’d try to drug you first chance she gets.”
“I promise, and I hate to say it wouldn’t surprise me one bit because I’ve already had that thought. I know where her mind is—get another kid, get more money—and I hate that. I wish I could find a way to get Scott away from her. Tell me he’s okay?”
I smile. “He learns the truth about her, and they don’t talk much now. The only time she was allowed at Ivy Hill was when they put your wedding section in the museum. He allowed her to come in and let the press get photos.”
He cringes and shakes his head. “It should be you there, not her.”
I sigh. “I know, but history is what it is. We know the truth, and that has to be enough.”
He rests his head against the back of the couch and looks at the ceiling for a bit before looking back at me.
“That day we toured Ivy Hill; it was the wedding exhibit you pulled me away from, wasn’t it?”
“Yeah, I figured you didn’t need to know about it until the time came. I told you knowing what is to come isn’t a gift; it’s a burden.” I force a half smile at him.
He rubs my back. “That is a burden I will gladly share with you if you will only let me.”
“I know. A few more years and you will know everything.” I give a sad smile.
After dinner, we sit down with his dad to work on his will to make sure his son and his dad are taken care of.
“When does he... um, when we will...?” His dad stumbles over the question.
I give him a sad smile. “August 1969. We have a bit yet, but ...” I pause and look at David. “I’d like to have you come home with us to meet your grandkids. I want you to know how to get to us so you can visit if everything works, even if not.”
I watch his eyes water, and he nods. David is smiling.
“I will get Clint and Nancy to hold things down here while we are gone,” David says, then stands up. “Now, it’s time for some alone time with my girl.” He takes my hand and pulls me toward the stairs, making his dad laugh.
