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Share What’s Fair

AGE RANGE: 3 to 5 years

RESEARCH AREAS: Social development, sharing, fairness

THE EXPERIMENT

You’ll need two relatively large teddy bears or other stuffed animals, along with an assortment of twelve smaller toys. You’ll also need a helper, with whom you will act out the teddy bears’ parts.

Have your child sit between the two bears, and distribute four toys to each animal and four toys to your child. Let your child play with the toys. Meanwhile, you and the helper should allow each bear to play with the toys they were given. After about a minute, collect all the toys and explain that you are going to redistribute them. Give three toys to your child and nine toys to the bear that your helper has control of. Explain that everyone can begin playing with the toys again.

Now do some playacting with your bear, and stop the experiment once your child responds. First, say, “I don’t have any toys.” Note whether your child responds in some way, such as by offering some of her own toys or by suggesting that the other bear share its toys. If, after a few seconds’ pause, your child has not responded, have the bear say, “I wish I had toys to play with.” Again, note whether your child responds. If not, after another pause, have your bear reach in your child’s direction. If, after a final pause, your child still has not responded, have the bear directly ask your child, “May I please have some of your toys?”

THE HYPOTHESIS

Both three-year-olds and five-year-olds are more likely to share some of their own toys than to appeal to the other bear. But five-year-olds will be more likely than three-year-olds to involve the bear who has the most toys, such as by asking that bear to share with the other bear.

THE RESEARCH

In a 2013 study on sharing, researchers had children ages three and five sit at table. Two stuffed bears were seated nearby. At first, the experimenters distributed an equal number of toys to the child and each bear. Then, the toys were gathered up and distributed unequally. The child received a quarter of the toys, one of the bears received the rest of the toys, and the other bear received none. The bear who received no toys then began to appeal, in increasingly direct ways, for the child to share. The researchers took note of whether the child refused to share, agreed to share some or all of the toys, or appealed to the other bear to share its toys.

In about half of all trials, children in both the three-year-old group and the five-year-old group agreed to share some of their toys. On average, they shared about half of their toys. Three-year-olds were very unlikely to involve the other bear. Five-year-olds were more likely to ask the other bear to share its toys, although not as likely as they were to share their own toys. In a follow-up experiment in which the child, rather than the other bear, was given the majority of the toys, five-year-olds were more likely to share their own toys than in the previous experiment, and less likely to involve the bear with the smaller number of toys.

The researchers concluded that at both ages three and five, children were sensitive to the unequal distribution of toys and were willing to act, either by sharing their own toys or by appealing to the other bear to share its toys, to make the distribution more equal. But differences emerged in their expectations about the fairest way to resolve inequality. Three-year-olds generally did not involve the bear with the most resources; the few who did just reached over and took its toys, rather than appealing to the bear’s sense of fairness. In contrast, five-year-olds appeared sensitive to which participant had the most resources. When it was the other bear, their appeals typically made mention of that fact, and when the children had the majority of the toys, it increased their likelihood of sharing.

THE TAKEAWAY

Fairness is an extremely important concept to preschoolers, and most will very vocally object when they observe unfairness, especially when it’s at their own expense. The results of this study suggest that between ages three and five, your child’s innate sense of fairness becomes more developed. Children become more willing to socially engage with others and to encourage others to share their resources when they have more than their fair share. It bears noting that the reason why they make these appeals is because they have come to understand that fairness is a moral concept that is recognized by nearly all people, that one’s duty to share becomes greater with the amount of resources they have, and that by appealing to another person’s sense of duty, they can persuade that person to share. These are sophisticated concepts. Problems that involve equitable distribution of resources might, in fact, be the first time that your child has to confront both math and morality together.

One way to encourage your child to share is by helping her develop empathy. You might, for instance, ask your child how she would feel if she were the bear with no toys. Does the lack of toys feel even more painful when others have many toys but are unwilling to share? As your child develops a greater sensitivity to inequality, she is likely to expect others to have a similar sensitivity and may become frustrated when they refuse to share or when they act callously. Emphasize to your child that although she might not be able to compel others to share, setting a good example is always an appropriate way to positively influence them.