MORAL TO THE STORY: Do you really know Jesus?
A CAUTION: Don’t take your eternal fate for granted.
“Wherefore the rather, brethren, give diligence to make your
calling and election sure: for if ye do these things, ye shall
never fall” (II Peter 1:10).
The next story is special to me. Sheila tells the story of meeting her future husband Shad at a club where he was a leading rock star musician. I remember sitting in a pizza parlor when Shad’s #1 pop song came over the speakers. The heavy beat and sad words filled the air, “Come back when you grow up girl. You’re still living in a paper doll world. Living ain’t easy and loving’s twice as tough so come back baby, when you grow up.”
I recall smiling as I listened because I knew the man who had written and sung that song was now a child of the living God. Living and loving is easy with a new heart full of God.
story seven
MY NAME IS SHEILA and this is my love story. When I was young, I read every fairytale I could get my hands on. I dreamed of being a beautiful princess and having a handsome prince come and take me away on his white horse to a beautiful castle, where we would live happily ever after. The Bible says Satan is the god of this world, and in his world there are no loving princes. When I was in junior high school, I discovered that most boys were anything but chivalrous princes. It seemed I was inevitably attracted to the very guys who treated me with little regard and even less respect. I was always hurt and disappointed, because it seemed the more I loved someone, the less he loved me. But deep in my heart, I still held onto the dream of finding someone who would love me unconditionally–someone who would love me for who I was, not what I could do for them.
When I was 18, my mother, my sister and I moved to Memphis so we could be closer to family and so I could attend college there. One night I was attending a frat party and there was a band playing. A friend of mine introduced me to the lead singer, and there was an instant attraction. We began dating and fell in love immediately. This guy was so cool, and he was crazy about me. Finally I felt like a loved princess. After only five months, we decided that we wanted to get married. To say that my mother was against this was the understatement of all time. My mother was a Christian, and she was appalled that her daughter was dating a rock-and-roll musician, much less that she was talking about marrying one. Shad and I did the only rational, reasonable thing to do–we ran away and got married. My white horse turned out to be a green Mustang and my castle turned out to be his mom and dad’s house. As if that wasn’t bad enough, I soon realized that my prince was a bit of a tyrant, but by then it was obvious that I was a shrew.
Shad was a typical artist with the stormy temperament that can come with that type of personality. There were very few breakable items that lasted for very long around our home. I knew he would never hurt me, but all my little knick-knacks were not that lucky! Even with all the chaos around our home, I never doubted for one instant that my husband loved me. However, all that love didn’t change the fact that both of us were full of selfishness, and neither of us had any idea of what God intended in marriage. Our idea of a perfect marriage was changing the other person into our idea of the perfect mate.
That right there is the #1 marriage-wrecking mistake of all time, even for Christians. You marry someone first, then try to turn them into what you want your spouse to be.
You can imagine how well that was working out! Neither of us was being a perfect mate, and neither of us was able to change the other into what we wanted.
One day a preacher came to our house to visit. We fully expected the man to tell us how bad we were and how awful our lifestyle was, but he didn’t. He simply talked about how Jesus loved us and died for us, and then he quietly prayed for us. He seemed to really care. Shad said that he didn’t know if he liked the guy or believed everything he said, but he sure was impressed by the guy’s humility. The preacher came two more times to share the love of Christ. A few nights after the preacher’s third visit, Shad got involved in a nasty fight after his band played at a club. The next day he was still consumed with bitter anger toward the guys he had fought. In an effort to cool his emotions, he took his guitar and went out to sit in a swing in the backyard. As he sat there, he began to think about what the preacher had said. Shad began to sing/pray to God in the only way he knew. He told God he was tired of living with anger and he wanted to be different. He told God that if He could make him a different person and change his life, then that’s what he wanted.
God is ever ready to forgive and reach out to us right where we are. He looked down and saw a man who hated where sin was taking him and just wanted to know the forgiving, loving Savior. Shad picked his guitar and sang to God, saying, “When I get up out of this swing, I want you to get up with me.” The amazing God heard his song/prayer and got up with Shad. It was a couple of days before Shad told me what had happened, and even though I didn’t say so, I was really concerned about what this would mean.
We began to go to church, and this rock-and-roll guy that I had married suddenly began to talk about becoming a preacher. I cannot begin to tell you how disappointed I was. I did not marry a preacher; I married an up-and-coming rock star! It seemed like my whole world was coming unraveled all because some kind-hearted preacher came to visit us. I tried to put on a good front and act like a nice little Christian girl, but it was really taxing the limits of my abilities. I had gone to church since I was a little girl, but I really didn’t know what it meant to have a personal relationship with Christ. However, as I watched the change in Shad’s life, I began to see that there was more involved in this Christianity thing than just going to church and being “good.” Truth was hard to resist. Finally, God broke through the façade of my life and showed me I had no hope apart from really knowing Him. That day I asked Jesus to forgive me of my sin and come and be the Lord of my life. From that point on, my life changed dramatically – in every way.
God really did have a purpose for Shad’s life; He called him to be an evangelist. And I began to realize that if God called Shad, He called me, too. A man trying to do anything with a wife who doesn’t support and believe in him is hard enough, but being in the ministry is even harder. I never considered myself to be a strong person, but as I began to try to become what my husband needed in a wife, God was there, ready to draw out of me things that I didn’t know I was capable of. When my husband saw my heart was to do God’s will and honor him, he eagerly poured his life back into me. He drew me into the ministry with him more and more. Before long we were singing together and ministering to young people all over the southern United States. After we had our children, we would take them with us and share the gospel anywhere God opened a door. But there was another, larger ministry God had for us on the horizon.
In 1975 Shad and I went on a mission trip with our church to East Africa. While we were there, God spoke into our hearts in no uncertain terms that He wanted us to go into international evangelism. We didn’t know anyone overseas, and we would have to trust God to provide for the finances necessary to do this type of ministry. We also knew, from the beginning, that this would involve being separated for three and four weeks at a time. My responsibility would be to hold down the fort at home and take care of the house and family so that Shad could travel overseas and do what God had called him to do. No one wants to be left at home doing chores while wonderful and exciting things are happening overseas. It was hard, but I knew God needed me to do my part even if my part was not so exciting. I saw it as ministry, so I was able to take care of family life, train children, manage our finances, make minor repairs around the house, paint, wallpaper, sew, mow the grass, and deal with ministry business while I was home without my husband. And when he returned home I knew he would be tired from the long trip, several weeks of uncomfortable surroundings, and strange food. I would dress extra nice when I picked him up at the airport. We didn’t have much money, but I would manage somehow to have his favorite meals and a special dessert when he got home. I would have nice fluffy towels in the bathroom and fresh linens on the bed so that he could be especially comfortable. This might sound sweet, but it was really a miracle. If you could have seen our early married life, you would realize what a miracle it really was. But something had changed after we were saved, really changed. We had become new creatures. Our whole attitude toward life was different. We began to try to become what the other person wanted instead of trying to change each other into the “ideal” mate. It is God who makes true Princesses. They are not born; they are born again!
I wish I could tell you it all came naturally and easily, but that would be a lie. It was anything but natural; it was supernatural. It was anything but easy; it was hard work. As we yielded ourselves more and more to the leadership of the Holy Spirit, God made us more and more what we needed to be for each other. The more I gave of myself to my husband, the more he gave of himself to me. Ephesians 5 says that the wife is to “reverence her husband” (v. 33) and to submit to him “as unto the Lord” (v. 22). This will, in turn, cause the husband to “love his wife even as himself” (v. 33) and to love her “as Christ also loved the church, and gave himself for it” (v. 25). God enabled us to choose to put the other person first and, as a result, find ourselves as equal partners in a wonderful life.
Now that our children are grown and married, I travel with my husband everywhere he goes. In fact, we spend all day, every day, together and have for years. I have women ask me sometimes, “How can you stand to be around your husband 24 hours a day? Don’t you need some time for yourself?” At those moments, I realize anew how God reached down and saved two hell-bound sinners, how he taught us how to really love and surrender our rights to each other, and how he used us to tell others about himself. Salvation is free, an unearned gift.
My husband is my best friend, the love of my heart, and the delight of my life. I would rather spend time with him than anyone else. When I look at him, I see that prince that I always wanted. And my husband tells me that I am the most beautiful woman in the world. He tells me I’m the perfect wife, his life is complete because of me, and that he is forever thankful that God gave me to him. He adores me in a million ways and makes me feel like that princess I always wanted to be.
My glorious marriage became possible as I turned my heart to honor my husband, but then, as a child of God I could do no less. So I really did end up with the fairytale after all. I married the handsome prince, and I am living happily ever after. God taught us that to have happily ever after you must be a giver instead of a taker. Then God gives and gives and gives.
You can follow Shad and Sheila’s ministry at: www.wegotothem.com
~Sheila
The Queen of His Heart
God warns us, “Examine yourselves, whether ye be in the faith; prove your own selves. Know ye not your own selves, how that Jesus Christ is in you…” (II Corinthians 13:5).
In this study we will do just that.
The girl in this story assumed she was a Christian. If her husband had not truly been saved, then today she might be sitting in church every Sunday still thinking she is a good Christian. It was the transforming change in his life, the abrupt turn-about of his mind and heart that led her to doubt that she had a real relationship with God.
When you really know God it shows. When you really have a relationship with God you know him like a friend. When you walk with God your heart will be constantly filled with him. You will not try to please him…you will just do whatever he wants you to do. If you know him, you will love him. Do you love him? Do you really know him?
As you read the following story, I adjure you to stop and ask yourself, “Do I truly have a real relationship with God? Am I sure that I know him?”
Most of you have always assumed you are a Christian, but does God know you are? Two times God says to us, “There is a way which seemeth right unto a man, but the end thereof are the ways of death” (Proverbs 14:12).
Salvation is easy and hard at the same time. God made it easy through the free gift of Jesus Christ, but we make it hard by trying to earn what God has already given. It is foolish to assume that because you made a profession, got baptized, and joined the church, you are on your way to heaven.
This next story illustrates what God has done for you through his beloved Son, Jesus.
Parable of the king’s son
(taken from By Divine Design, Michael Pearl)
In a faraway land and in another time, a benevolent king ruled his kingdom wisely, and all the people loved him. Well, not all. There was a small group of rebels who worked in secret, seeking to overthrow his rule. They wanted the freedom to engage in immoral revelry, which was not permitted under this righteous king. The usual punishment for treason was death, but the king passed a law saying that anyone guilty of treason would be allowed to live but would have his eyes put out. On several occasions young men were brought before the king to be tried for treason. After carefully hearing the evidence the king had regretfully pronounced the penalty of blindness upon some of these young men.
One day the king’s sheriff brought a young man before the court to be tried for treason. It was rumored that he was the ringleader of the rebellion. The king was disturbed by the hood covering the upper body of the prisoner. But the court lawyers requested that the concealment remain in place to assure that justice would be accomplished. The king went along with the request, assuming that the accused must be an acquaintance or perhaps the son of some state official. He had heard the evidence that proved to be overwhelmingly incriminating. When it came time to pass sentence the lawyers removed the hood to reveal the king’s own son. The king was about to pass the sentence of blindness on his only son. With great restraint of his emotions he announced that he would wait twenty-four hours to pronounce the judgment. Though it could not make a difference in the court’s decision, the king used that time, to no avail, trying to bring his son to repentance. The son felt sure that the father could not forgive him, and the penalty of the law was unavoidable.
During the intervening time, word of the developing situation spread over all the kingdom. There was much speculation about what the king would do. Half the people characterized the king as a man who placed duty and the letter of the law above his own feelings. They supposed the king would not only take out his son’s eyes but also have him executed as an example. The other half of the kingdom believed the king would yield to deep feelings toward his son and free him unharmed. Many believed that he would elicit from the son a promise of allegiance and then set aside the penalty of the law.
The king found himself in a dilemma, with two conflicting compulsions. He desired to save his son, and he desired to remain a just and lawful king. Having blinded others for the same offense, could he make an exception with his son and still maintain the public perception of justice? How could the public continue to respect his rule? Furthermore, if he should withhold the punishment, how could he command respect or control of his son? The offense would forever stand between the king and his son. If unpunished, would the rebellious son not be even bolder in his rebellion?
On the other hand, how could he pass sentence on his own son? Could a father who begat a son of his own body, and invested so much in rearing him, suddenly shut off all feelings? Could he just blind his son and forget? Would life have any further meaning for a father?
Twenty-four hours later the court was reconvened. The royal city was packed with expectant, solemn onlookers. The prisoner was brought into the court. His face not being covered, his bitterness was clear for all to see. Looking at his countenance, one would think he was holding his father responsible for his rebellion.
The king was the last to enter the chamber. With expectancy running high, he was led into the chamber wearing the hood his son wore the day before. Feebly, he was steered to his place on the throne. He immediately commenced to recount the incriminating evidence. Then while the crowd stood in hushed wonder, just when he was preparing to pass sentence he reached up and slipped the hood from his head. The audience fell back in revulsion as they saw the two gaping, bloody holes where royal eyes had once been. The crowd gasped as the king addressed the general public. A servant placed before the people a tray containing the king’s eyes. The king asked the general public if common justice could be served by the substitution of his eyes for his son’s. The people unanimously agreed that justice was served. The king had found a way to be faithful to his law, thereby maintaining its integrity, and a way to satisfy his love to his son.
One problem remained; the son’s rebellion. If the father had been able to elicit prior repentance from the son, the sacrifice would have seemed justifiable. But the offering was made when the son was still a self-proclaimed enemy of the king. That too was resolved in the king’s bloody sacrifice. Seeing the father’s love and forgiveness, the son was moved to repent toward his father. All doubt as to the father’s love and wisdom involuntarily vanished. The son fell at his father’s feet and begged for the forgiveness that he had already received. He was placed at the father’s right hand where he forever thereafter faithfully and benevolently assisted in all affairs of the kingdom.
The dilemma was solved. Sacrificing neither his love to his son nor justice, the law had been honored in a way that elevated it as never before. The king had not only expressed his love to his son, but had brought him to humble repentance. The integrity of the kingdom was maintained and the son was saved—all at the father’s expense. “That he might be just and the justifier…For God so loved the world that he gave….”
Write your testimony of when and how you came to understand God’s amazing sacrifice for you in your notebook. If you are not sure about your relationship to God, then write out a prayer asking God to show Himself to you that you might know him. He will answer such a prayer.
In the Teacher’s Guide at the back of the book is a list of questions and verses to help you learn what God says concerning salvation. His WORD is effectual. There is life-giving power in just knowing what God says. Go through that lesson.