Sienna pushed her bike through the archway that led to the cemetery and dismounted. There was a church to one side of her and next to it was small car park with a couple of gardeners unloading wheelbarrows. She ignored them and kept walking. At least it wasn’t busy. Then again, she had no idea what constituted busy for a Friday morning. Luckily she hadn’t been stopped by Libby this time. Her stepmother had been acting more than a little weird recently. Thankfully, she’d headed out in her car before Sienna had finished getting dressed.
There were two roads that split off to different parts of the cemetery but it felt weird to ride along them. Disrespectful. Though she knew it was stupid. Hearses did it all the time but it still felt wrong.
Trees were dotted between the headstones, casting finger-like shadows in the mid-morning sun. She used one hand to push her bike and the other to check her phone for messages. Okay. That was a lie. There was only one message she wanted to see. From one person. But there was nothing. She was so stupid to think they’d come. To think that they liked her. That they saw her as special.
Because she wasn’t special at all.
I’m just the freak who goes to the cemetery to look at graves.
It was still better than sitting through another tedious day of lessons that she didn’t care about. She slowed down to get her bearings. There was a square-shaped mausoleum to the left and she turned towards it.
The last time she’d been there was a year ago as part of the rowing club’s annual ‘Do Good Day’. Usually, it was bullshit. More like free child labour than anything as they were sent out to help at rest homes or to beaches to pick up litter.
But last year had been different. Her team had been sent to the cemetery with gardening gloves, buckets and instructions to tidy up the graves that no one cared for. Most of the girls were grossed out and had spent the day complaining about their nails.
But Sienna had loved it.
There was something so vast and otherworldly about pushing away the dirt and leaves from the flat concrete plinths so she could read the inscriptions. Those carved words and dates made all her stupid problems seem petty. Like why the hell would someone who died back in 1805 give a shit about whether Sienna Curtis had a slightly crooked smile that made her hate taking selfies?
It had been liberating.
Somehow, these people she didn’t know had freed her. It was like they’d taken her to another world. No, another planet. One where she felt like she belonged. Then she’d heard it.
A sobbing noise.
It had come from somewhere behind her, and she’d turned, half expecting to see a ghost. Instead, there was Hayley Terrace. Impossibly gorgeous with her hair hanging half over her tear-streaked face as she stared at the solemn stone angel guarding the gravestone.
The angel’s head was turned downwards, her expression laced with pain, as if somehow knowing that in the future vandals would break off her wings and age would turn her to a dull, mottled grey.
Sienna had been so shocked that she’d rushed to Hayley’s side before she could stop herself.
‘Hey, are you okay? Did you hurt yourself? There’s quite a lot of broken glass around here.’
Hayley had turned to her then, tears still glistening on her impossibly black lashes. ‘It’s not that. It’s just so bloody sad. Look. Kathryn Walsh was born in 1855 and died in 1870. She was fifteen. It makes everything else seem so, I don’t even know what the word is—’
‘Petty.’ Sienna finished off, the words raw against her throat. It was stupid really. They’d known each other for ever but had hardly ever spoken. What was the point when Hayley was older, more popular, and totally into boys. But in that moment, something shifted and Hayley’s eyes had widened, as if seeing Sienna for the first time.
It ripped through Sienna’s body like electricity. Switching on things that she hadn’t even known were there.
‘Yes. Exactly. Petty. From now on, whenever I get caught up in my own shit, I’m going to think about Kathy W and remind myself it’s not so bad.’
Sienna swallowed and pushed back the memories as she looked at her phone again. Still no message, but the two little blue ticks let her know that the person had read the text Sienna had sent. But was it even who she hoped it would be?
She flicked back to the photo that she’d posted last night. It was of the same stone angel that she’d photographed last year. And she’d tagged it #gothcore. It was more to piss people off than anything. To remind her former friends to keep their distance. And it had worked. It hardly had any comments or even likes. Until one had suddenly appeared. It was a thumbs up from a name she hadn’t seen before. Kathy W.
Kathryn Walsh.
Sienna had spent all night staring at it. Wondering. Hoping.
And then, she’d taken the risk. She’d sent Kathy W a message simply saying eleven o’clock in the morning. And so now she was here, to see if it was real. To see if it really had been Hayley and not just some stupid jerk trying to mess with her. Zoe or Tate. Or even Sam. She wouldn’t put it past any of them.
Her heart pounded as she followed the curve of the road past the newer gravestones until she finally reached the one with the solemn angel. The weeds had grown back, and someone had tagged the statue, though it was now covered with some kind of paint to hide what had been sprayed.
Disappointment caught in her mouth but before she could turn, a faint scent of vanilla drifted towards her. Hope filled her but she didn’t dare turn around.
‘You know it’s creepy, right? To ask someone to meet you at the cemetery,’ a familiar voice said and Sienna’s whole body reacted, sending trails of heat along her skin. It was her. She’d really come.
‘Takes one to know one,’ she retorted, before finally daring to look.
Hayley stepped out from behind one of the trees, half-hidden in the shadows. Her brown hair was pulled back and her dark eyes were rimmed with eyeliner, making her face paler than usual. Then again, she’d hardly been outside since it happened, so it might explain the pallor.
‘Are you calling me a creep?’ Hayley’s movements were jerky and uncertain, and her lower lip was dry, like she’d been chewing on it. But Sienna wanted to kiss it. And that had been the whole problem last time. The fact that she’d managed to have a crush on the straightest girl in school. Then Tate had come along, and Hayley had thrown herself at him, probably just to give Sienna the message more than anything.
Well, at least that’s what she tried to tell herself.
‘I’ve called you a lot worse.’ Sienna shrugged and Hayley wrinkled her button-like nose.
‘Nothing I didn’t deserve. If it’s any consolation, I am sorry, you know. About how things went with us. I didn’t mean to cut you like that. I just got… freaked.’
Irritation skittered up the back of Sienna’s neck. ‘Yeah, well, for the record, I wasn’t going to pounce on you or anything. You didn’t need to ghost me.’
‘I know. I guess I wasn’t thinking straight.’
‘Oh, you were thinking very straight,’ Sienna retorted and then regretted it when Hayley’s face drained of colour. ‘Sorry. I’m being a dick. Forget I said that.’
‘It’s not that.’ Hayley shook her head, though her eyes clouded over with pain. ‘I’m feeling a bit… well… I haven’t been out much lately. Mind if we sit down?’
Sienna swallowed and glanced at Kathryn Walsh’s grave. Back where it all began.
‘Sure.’ She lowered her bike to the ground and waited until Hayley had perched herself on the edge of the base. Sienna sat down across from her. The concrete was warm from the sun. ‘Thanks for coming. I didn’t know if you were still avoiding me. According to your mum, I’ve been stalking you.’
Hayley rolled her eyes towards the sky and let out a snort. ‘Yes, Adele has been on fine form. She’s convinced that all my friends are guilty and won’t let anyone into the house. Not that many have tried. And when it first happened it was too hard to even think about it, let alone talk. So maybe it was my fault as well. I just wanted to be on my own.’
‘I get that. It must be shit not remembering anything.’
Hayley’s lower lip trembled and her eyes glassed over, like she was on the verge of tears. ‘But I do remember. That’s why I’m here. I wanted to explain what really happened that night. The parts I can remember, anyway. Including the parts with you.’
Oh.
Icy dread swept through her, turning her to stone like the broken angel that hovered above Kathryn’s grave.
This whole time, she figured that Hayley hadn’t remembered. Isn’t that what she’d told the police? And why she’d been ignoring Sienna’s messages? Because she hadn’t been able to remember the phone call in the middle of the night and the drunken plea for Sienna to collect her from the bonfire at Highcliffe. The bonfire that Sienna hadn’t even been invited to.
And yet, Sienna had done it. She’d gone downstairs and realised she was the only one at home. Libby was working, her dad was doing something with their grandmother and Sam had gone to play Dungeons and Dragons. Except he hadn’t taken his car.
So, she’d driven it out there and found Hayley totally off her face, standing by the side of the road. Sienna had lost it then. Anything could have happened to her. What the hell had she been thinking? Except it had ended in an argument and Hayley had told her to stop the car so she could puke, but instead, she’d climbed out and gone running off across the reserve.
‘I hate you,’ she’d screamed.
She’d been so fast, and Sienna had stumbled over a log, and by the time she’d righted herself, Hayley had disappeared. She’d kept searching but after an hour, she’d given up and returned to the car. Leaving Hayley to—
A sob caught in her throat and then it turned to a wail.
‘I’m so sorry. I swear I tried to find you. I looked everywhere but you’d disappeared. I’ve been going out of my mind.’ Sienna cried, the tears that she’d been holding back for the last two weeks trailing down her face.
‘Wait. No, stop it. Sienna, it wasn’t your fault.’ Hayley’s eyes were wide with horror. ‘Is that what you thought?’
Sienna wrapped her arms around her torso to stop herself from falling apart completely. ‘Of course it’s my fault. You were off your face. I should never have let you get out of the car. Besides, Sam’s such a pig, he probably wouldn’t have even noticed if you had puked in there.’
Hayley gave a watery laugh, but it didn’t last long. ‘Stop blaming yourself. I’m the one who took the drugs. I’m such an idiot. When Zoe gave them to me, I should have chucked them away.’
Sienna sucked in a breath. ‘Wait… Zoe gave you drugs? Are you sure?’
‘Oh, yes. Not that she’d ever admit it, of course. She’s been texting me all week asking what I remember. I think she’s shitting herself that I’ll tell the police.’
‘Why don’t you?’ Sienna said, her voice a little above a whisper. ‘Tell them what you remember.’
Hayley shook her head. ‘I can’t bear to go through everything again. And I know it’s bad, because what if the sicko tries it again on someone else, and this time doesn’t leave the door unlocked? But… I just want everything to go back to normal.’
Sienna had heard a rumour that the door had been left unlocked, which was how Hayley managed to escape, but it was the second part that caused her stomach to drop. She remembered the look of despair on Tate’s face when she’d found him the other night. He clearly regretted breaking up with Hayley. Did that mean they’d be getting back together?
‘Oh.’ She got to her feet. This whole stupid thing has been a mistake. ‘Well, I’d better get going and I hope you and Tate are—’
‘Ew, Tate.’ Hayley’s whole face crinkled as if she’d sucked a lemon. ‘No thanks. I’ve had enough of Tate to last a lifetime. In fact, I’ve had enough of boys,’ she added as she got to her feet.
Sienna’s mouth went dry and her heart thumped against her ribs as Hayley took a small step towards her. The shadow of the stone angel seemed to embrace them against the morning sun. Hayley’s breath was warm against her check and Sienna’s knees almost buckled.
Was this really happening?
‘A-are you sure?’ she managed to whisper.
‘I’ve been sure for three hundred and eighty-one days, since you told me that being in the cemetery was like being in another world and it made everything else seem… petty. I got a little scared, that’s all.’
Sienna was on fire as their eyes locked together. ‘Next time you get scared, just say so. A lot less stressful than watching you date Tate.’
Hayley let out a watery laugh and then leaned forward.
Sienna’s first kiss was everything she’d imagined. Right down to the gothic splendour of standing in a cemetery, and it wasn’t until they pulled apart that she realised Hayley was holding her hand, their fingers entwined.
‘Forgive me?’ Hayley asked, a small smile on her lips.
‘It could be a process,’ Sienna said. ‘Though it’s a good start,’ she added, which prompted Hayley to kiss her again.
‘I can live with that.’ Then she closed her eyes and a shadow once again passed across her face. ‘I’m sorry I didn’t tell you sooner. I really didn’t think you’d blame yourself. If anything, I was worried you might have said something.’
‘The advantage of having no friends, remember?’ Sienna swallowed, as the other reason stampeded through her thoughts like a proverbial bull. Because she didn’t know how her brother fitted into everything and she’d been terrified she might make things worse if she said anything. She was still terrified. Not that her meathead brother deserved it. But… she had to know. ‘Why did you text Sam?’
‘He didn’t tell you?’ Hayley chewed her lower lip, the colour draining from her face. Sienna went very still, like something dark and terrible was trying to drag her back down to the earth.
‘Tell me what?’
‘He was the one who sold Zoe the drugs.’