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Acceptance-based behavior therapy, 283n
Accepting things as they are
becoming disentangled from our thoughts, 177–185
cultivating, 175–177
overview of, 107–108, 169–175, 285n–286n, 290n
turning toward your emotions via, 185–187
Action tendencies. See also Behaviors
clarifying what matters to you and, 195–198
overview of, 129–130, 289n
value-based living and, 222–236
willingness and acceptance and, 172–173
Alcohol use, 8, 68
Anger. See also Emotional experiences
becoming familiar with our emotions and, 126
mindfulness and, 96
muddy emotions and, 229–230
overview of, 46, 285n
Anticipation, 22, 138–139
Anxiety
compared to fear, 20–31
controlling, 152–165
exercise regarding, 74, 122
mindfulness and, 96, 286n–288n
Anxiety disorders mindfulness and, 6–7
overview of, 31–37, 284n, 285n–286n
problems associated with, 36–37
reactions to our reactions and, 143–144
resources for, 6–7 Apprehension, 126
Attention anxiety’s affect on, 59–66
breath exercises and, 87–88
controlling anxiety and, 166
mindfulness and, 66–67, 80–89, 97, 106–108, 119–122, 288n
multitasking and, 76–80
narrowing of, 61–64, 224–225
overview of, 59
value-based living and, 224–225
Automatic pilot, 76–80, 80–89
Avoidance
anxiety disorders and, 37
automatic pilot and, 78–80
challenges in life events and, 278–278
choices and, 42–43, 43–46
clarifying what matters to you and, 198–200
controlling anxiety and, 157
cost of, 40–43
emotional experiences and, 67–70
exercise regarding, 42–43, 55–57
habitual avoidance, 52–55
identifying your signs and symptoms of anxiety, 19–20
listening to our emotions and, 128–130
mindfulness and, 67
overview of, 285n–286n
paradox involved in living a fulfilling life and, 150–151
participation and engagement in place of, 70–72
playing it safe and, 150–151
Avoidance (cont.)
signs indicating a need to revisit mindfulness, 272
subtle avoidance, 46–52
value-based living and, 26
Awareness, 106, 119–122
Balance, 230–232, 272
Befriending our emotions, 131–133
Beginner’s mind, 107, 119, 204
Behavioral psychotherapy, 283n
Behaviors. See also Action tendencies; Avoidance
becoming familiar with our emotions and, 124–126, 127
clarifying what matters to you and, 195–198
commitment to behavior change and, 215–222
emotional experiences and, 68
identifying your signs and symptoms of anxiety, 19
other people’s behavior and, 203–206
self-compassion and, 249–254
thoughts and, 183–184
willingness and acceptance and, 172–173
worry habits, 25–26
Beliefs, 64. See also Thoughts
Bodily sensations. See Physical sensations
Boredom during mindfulness practice, 110
Breath exercises
breathing from the belly, 104–106
Mindfulness of Breath exercise, 86–87
overview of, 265
reactions to, 87
self-compassion and, 240–241 starting a formal mindfulness practice and, 102–108
Buddhism, 81, 82
Care for ourselves, 144–145
Challenges in mindfulness practice
being in the mood to practice, 121
finding the time for practice, 117–118
life events and, 273–278
making mindfulness a regular part of your life and, 268
overview of, 103–104, 110–111
physical discomfort, 103–104, 113–114
value-based living and, 227–230
Change challenges in life events and, 273–278
commitment to behavior change and, 215–222
course of, 259–264
lapses and, 218–219
making mindfulness a regular part of your life and, 269–272
natural ebb and flow of, 269–272 overview of, 291n
Childhood history, 159–162, 201–203
Choices challenges in life events and, 280–281
commitment to behavior change and, 215–216, 217–218
compared to avoidance, 43–46
habitual avoidance and, 52–55
limits on, 42–43
overview of, 264
paradox involved in living a fulfilling life and, 150–151
signs indicating a need to revisit mindfulness, 272
willingness and acceptance and, 172
Clouds and Sky mindfulness exercise, 176–177
Cognitive-behavioral psychotherapy, 283n, 286n–287n
Commitment to behavior change, 215–222, 220–222
Commitment to practice meditation, 101–102
Communication, 126–127 Community involvement, 194–195
Compassion. See also Self-compassion
attention and, 66–67
emotional experiences and, 69–70
mindfulness and, 81, 84
other people’s behavior and, 205–206
overview of, 264
reactions to our reactions and, 144–145
replacing self-criticism with, 65
Confusion, 79, 136
Control exercise regarding, 153–154, 160–161, 167
other people’s behavior and, 203–206
overview of, 24–25, 148–149, 264, 289n–290n
paradox involved in living a fulfilling life and, 149, 152–165
signs indicating a need to revisit mindfulness, 272
thoughts and, 179–180
value-based living and, 26
Coronary heart disease, 97, 287n
Courage, 159
Critical thoughts. See also Thoughts
avoidance and, 42
exercise regarding, 247–248, 255–256
identifying your signs and symptoms of anxiety, 19
mindfulness and, 89, 103
reaction to emotions and, 65
self-compassion and, 239, 246
Cultural factors, 159–160, 248
Curiosity, 81, 93
Danger, 18–19
Defensive mind, 252
Depression, 8, 97, 283n–284n. See also
Emotional experiences
Detachment, 146
Diabetes, 98, 288n
Disappointment, 129, 157. See also Emotional experiences
Discomfort during mindfulness, 103–104, 113–114, 262–263
Discontent, 79. See also Quality of life
Dissatisfaction, 79. See also Quality of life
Distraction techniques
controlling anxiety and, 162–164
emotional experiences and, 68
identifying your signs and symptoms of anxiety, 20
listening to our emotions and, 128–130
self-compassion and, 246
Distressed feelings
becoming familiar with our emotions and, 126
challenges in life events and, 273–278
muddy emotions and, 136
other people’s behavior and, 204
overview of, 285n, 289n
Doubt, 274–275
Drinking. See Alcohol use
Drug use. See Substance use
Eating behaviors, 68, 137–138
Eating disorders, 8
Education, 194, 207–213
Emotional experiences. See also Muddy emotions
automatic pilot and, 80
avoidance and, 67–70
becoming familiar with, 124–126
befriending our emotions, 131–133, 133–134, 288n–289n
exercise regarding, 265–266
hot stove analogy, 128–130
“leftover” responses to, 139–140
listening to our emotions, 128–130
mindfulness and, 66–67, 69–70, 140–147
overview of, 66, 264
paradox involved in living a fulfilling life and, 148–167
why we have emotions, 126–127
Emotional recall, 125
Emotional responses, 133–134, 183–184, 239–242
Emotions (in addition to anxiety), 19. See also specific emotions
Engagement, 70–72, 71–72, 170–171
Entangled with emotions, 145–146
Environment, 100
Escape, 19–20, 40–43. See also Avoidance
Excitement, 157 Experiences, 181–184
Experiences, emotional, 66, 66–67, 67–70. See also Emotional experiences
Family history, 159–162, 201–203
Fear
becoming familiar with, 124–126
compared to anxiety, 20–31, 284n
controlling anxiety and, 158–159
exercise regarding, 74
mindful monitoring of fear and anxiety exercise, 122
narrowing of attention and, 61–64
willingness and acceptance and, 172–173
Feelings. See Emotional experiences; specific feelings
Fibromyalgia, 97, 287n
“Fight” behavioral response, 46. See also Anger
Fight-or-flight response, 20–21, 129–130, 248
Flexibility
challenges in life events and, 280–281
commitment to behavior change and, 217–218
exercise regarding, 266
signs indicating a need to revisit mindfulness, 272
Formal mindfulness practice
beginning, 99–118
challenges in, 103–104, 110–111, 277–278
list of practices, 265–266
making a regular part of your life, 265–272
mindfulness of physical sensations, 112–118
mindfulness of sounds, 108–112
mindfulness-based progressive muscle relaxation (MB-PMR) and, 114–116
movement in mindfulness practice, 116–117
Freeze response, 21, 40, 248
Frustration, 96, 203–206
Fused relationships with emotions, 145–146
Generalized anxiety disorder, 36, 285n–286n
Goals, 190–192. See also Values
Grief, 273–278
“The Guest House” (Rumi), 168–169, 239–240, 266, 271
Habits, 25–26, 136, 198–200
Habitual avoidance, 52–55. See also Avoidance
Health, 98, 288n
Heart disease, 97, 287n
Heart rate, 143–144
History, 159–162, 201–203
Hobbies, 79
Hooked relationship with emotions, 145–146
Hope, 157
Hopelessness, 79
Hot stove analogy, 128–130
Household management, 194, 207–213
Immune system functioning, 97, 288n
Impulses, 127, 129–130
Informal mindfulness practice, 119–122, 265–272, 277–278
Insomnia, 97, 286n–287n
Intensity of our emotions, 136. See also Emotional experiences
Internal obstacles, 227–230
Journalling. See Writing exercises
Judgmental responses, 136, 239, 242–243
Kindness and care, 84, 264. See also Compassion; Self-compassion
Lapses, 218–222, 269–272
Laziness, 244–248
“Leftover” responses, 139–140
Life events, 273–278, 292n
Listening to our emotions, 128–130. See also Emotional experiences
Location for practicing mindfulness, 100
Logic, 180–181
Longevity, 98, 288n
Loss, 273–278, 292n
MB-PMR (mindfulness-based progressive muscle relaxation), 114–116
Medications, 7 Memory, 79, 125–126
Mindful stance, 149, 165–166
Mindfulness of breath, 86–87, 93–94, 265
Mindfulness of emotions, 131–133
Mindfulness of emotions and physical sensations, 140–147
Mindfulness of physical sensations, 112–118
Mindfulness of sounds, 108–112, 288n
Mindfulness of thoughts, 184–185
Mindfulness overview, 1–2, 72–74, 83–84, 263–264, 284n, 286n
benefits of, 89–92, 97–99
challenges in life events and, 275
determining if this book is for you and, 6–8
formal mindfulness practice, 99–118
informal mindfulness practice, 119–122
making a regular part of your life, 265–272
multitasking and auto pilot and, 80–89
resources for, 294–299
signs indicating a need to revisit, 272
Mindfulness-based progressive muscle relaxation (MB-PMR), 114–116
Mindfulness-based stress reduction (MBSR), 286n–287n, 286n–288n
Monitoring, 186–187 Mood to practice, 121
Morals, 208 Mountain meditation, 220–222, 266
Movement in mindfulness practice, 116–117
Muddy emotions. See also Emotional experiences
anger and, 229–230
anxiety as, 164–165
cause of, 137–140
exercise regarding, 147
“leftover” responses to, 139–140
making mindfulness a regular part of your life and, 268
obstacles to self-compassion and, 239
other people’s behavior and, 204
overview of, 135–136
reactions to our reactions and, 143–145
self-compassion and, 246
signs indicating a need to revisit mindfulness, 272
value-based living and, 26, 228
Multitasking, 76–80, 80–89, 79, 286n
Narrowing of attention, 61–64. See also Attention
New-aged beliefs, 82
Nonverbal communication, 126–127
Normal worrying and anxiety, 31–32
Numbness, 126
“Observing self,” 176–177
Obsessive–compulsive disorder (OCD), 36
Obstacles, 227–230, 292n. See also Challenges in mindfulness practice
Outside support for practice, 266–267
Overwhelming emotions, 136
Pain, 97, 128–130, 273–278. See also Emotional experiences
Panic attacks, 32–33, 36–37, 143–144
Panic disorder, 36
Paradox involved in living a fulfilling life
controlling anxiety and, 149, 152–165
mindful stance and, 149, 165–166
overview of, 148–149
playing it safe and, 149, 150–152
Participation, 70–72, 71–72
Patterns, 268
Personality, 82–83 Perspective, 81
Phobia, specific, 37
Physical sensations
becoming familiar with our emotions and, 125–126, 127
exercise regarding, 265
fear and, 20–21
identifying your signs and symptoms of anxiety, 19
mindfulness and, 103–104, 112–118, 140–147
overview of, 264
physical discomfort during mindfulness, 103–104, 113–114
reaction to emotions and, 64–66
self-compassion and, 240–241
Playing it safe response, 149, 150–152
Positive thinking, 68
Posttraumatic stress disorder (PTSD), 36–37
Posture, 85
Power, 20 Practicing mindfulness, 93–94, 286n–287n
Praise, 242–243
Preference, 198–200
Present moment, 106
Priorities, 70–72
Problem solving, 25–31, 138–139, 180–181
Professional help, 6–7, 293–300
Progressive muscle relaxation, 114–116
Protecting yourself, 20, 20–21, 150–151. See also Avoidance
Psoriasis, 98, 288n
Quality of life
becoming familiar with our emotions and, 127
mindfulness and, 97, 287n
multitasking and, 79
paradox involved in living a fulfilling life and, 148–167
subtle avoidance and its affect on, 46–52
Rationalizations, 157
Reaction to emotions
attention and, 64–66
making mindfulness a regular part of your life and, 268
mindfulness and, 96 overview of, 143–145
Recording your experiences. See Writing exercises
Relapse, 218–222, 269–272, 272
Relationships
avoidance and, 42
balance and, 230–232
mindfulness and, 97, 287n
multitasking and, 79
other people’s behavior and, 203–206
self-compassion and, 256–258
subtle avoidance and its affect on, 46–52
thoughts and, 182–183 values and, 193–194, 203–206
Relaxation, 83, 114–116
Religious beliefs, 82
Reminders to keep mindfulness present, 267–268
Resources, 6–7, 292n, 293–300
Rituals, 101–102
Routines
being in the mood to practice and, 121
challenges in life events and, 274
making mindfulness a regular part of your life and, 265–272
starting a formal mindfulness practice and, 101–102
Ruminations, 18, 25. See also Thoughts;
Sadness, 126, 129, 275. See also Emotional experiences
Scheduling meditation
being in the mood to practice and, 121
challenges in, 117–118
making mindfulness a regular part of your life and, 265–272
starting a formal mindfulness practice and, 100–102
Self-care, 278
Self-compassion. See also Compassion
balance and, 232
challenges in life events and, 275
cultivating, 254–258
exercise regarding, 238, 240–241, 252–253, 255–256
mindfulness and, 81, 84 obstacles to, 238–254
overview of, 107, 237–238, 291n–292n
Self-discipline, 244–248
Self-esteem, 242–243, 291n
Self-evaluation, 242–244
Self-focus, 61–64
Self-fulfilling prophecies, 157–158
Self-help approaches, 283n
Selfishness, 247–248
Self-nurturance, 194–195
Sensations, physical. See Physical sensations
Sexual functioning, 97, 287n–288n
Shame, 126
Shortness of breath, 143–144
Signs of anxiety, 15–20, 31–37
Sitting for mindfulness practice, 84–85, 112–113
Skepticism, 274–275
Skills in mindfulness, 106–108, 286n–288n
Sleep problems, 97, 137–138
Smoking, 97 Social anxiety, 37
Social phobia, 37
Sounds, mindfulness of, 108–112
Specific phobia, 37
Spiritual beliefs, 82
Stomach, breathing from, 104–106
Stressors, 7–8, 97, 287n
Substance use, 8, 97
Subtle avoidance, 46–52. See also Avoidance
Suppression of feelings, 285n–286n. See Control
Symptoms of anxiety, 15–20, 31–37
Television watching, 68
Tension, 114–116 Thoughts. See also Beliefs; Critical thoughts; Ruminations; Worries
automatic pilot and, 80
becoming disentangled from, 177–185
behavior and, 183–184
breath exercises and, 88
clarifying what matters to you, 196–198
commitment to behavior change and, 216
emotional experiences and, 68
exercise regarding, 183, 184, 186–187, 266
identifying your signs and symptoms of anxiety, 18–19
obstacles to self-compassion and, 239
overview of, 177–178, 264 values and, 193
willingness and acceptance and, 290n
Three-Minute breathing space, 233–235
Time for practicing mindfulness
being in the mood to practice and, 121
challenges in, 117–118
making mindfulness a regular part of your life and, 265–272
overview of, 82
starting a formal mindfulness practice and, 100–101
Tobacco use, 97 Trapped feelings, 41–42
Traumatic events, 36–37, 275–276
Triggers, 268
Unsettled feelings, 126, 262–263
Upset feelings, 136
Value-based living. See also Values
challenges in life events and, 278
life events and, 273–278
making mindfulness a regular part of your life and, 269
overview of, 222–236
signs indicating a need to revisit, 272
Values. See also Value-based living
clarifying what matters to you, 195–213, 233
in everyone, 206–207
exercise regarding, 192–195, 201, 212–213
other people’s behavior and, 203–206
overview of, 189–195, 264, 291n
value-based living, 222–236
work and, 207–213
Where to practice mindfulness, 100
“Who is driving your bus?” exercise, 196–198
Willingness becoming disentangled from our thoughts, 177–185
cultivating, 175–177
exercise regarding, 266
overview of, 169–175, 290n
value-based living and, 26
Work
balance and, 230–232
multitasking and, 79
self-compassion and, 244–248
values and, 194, 207–213
Worries. See also Ruminations; Thoughts
becoming familiar with our emotions and, 126
compared to problem solving, 25–31, 284n
function of, 28–30
identifying your signs and symptoms of anxiety, 18
muddy emotions and, 138–139
reactions to our reactions and, 143–144
as subtle avoidance, 46–52
why people worry, 29–31, 284n
Worry habits, 25–26
Worthiness, 249–254
Writing exercises
avoidance and, 55–57
befriending our emotions and, 131–133
challenges in life events and, 277
commitment and, 215–216
mindfulness of emotions and physical sensations and, 142
paying attention to fear and anxiety in a new way, 74
thoughts and, 186–187
tracking your formal mindfulness practices, 102
turning toward your emotions via, 33–35
values and, 192–195, 212–213
Yoga, 83, 117