Liz had slept badly and she woke up feeling tired. She had finally got off to sleep around three in the morning. When she thought about it she realised that it was Nick coming to the house that was on her mind. She wasn’t worried about being alone with Nick, she loved his company, but it was Jim’s house. She felt almost as though she was committing adultery, betraying him in some way, which was ridiculous. Nick made her happy and that made her feel guilty, but what for? She had been a good wife.
She wasn’t sure that Nick coming over was such a good idea. Maybe she should ring him and make an excuse to put him off. It was nearly nine o’clock now and he was due to arrive by eleven. She tried his mobile and when he didn’t answer she resigned herself to the fact that he was coming and she was being silly. She got washed and dressed quickly and carefully applied a little make-up which she now did on a regular basis. She made a cup of tea and went outside to sit in the garden.
Nick turned up at eleven on the dot and getting no reply after ringing the bell went to the side gate and knocked loudly.
‘Coming,’ shouted Liz, who had been busy watering the plants. She spent as much time as she possibly could in the garden now, she couldn’t get enough of it. It would only get better as the plants matured and the paving weathered.
‘Hiya,’ said Nick, smiling as he walked down the path behind her. ‘I thought you’d be out here.’
‘We don’t get enough summer to waste any being indoors,’ said Liz, leading the way. ‘Would you like a cup of tea?’
‘I’d love one.’ He sat down at the table and opened a newspaper he had brought with him. Liz looked out the window while she waited for the kettle to boil. It felt so familiar. Jim would sit and read the papers in the same spot while she made tea and breakfast and watched him from the window. Except that she didn’t look at Nick in the same way.
‘Monica and Tammy are coming by later. I thought we could barbeque if you don’t mind.’
‘Great,’ said Nick, ‘I’m a dab hand on the barbeque.’
‘Well that’s good to know,’ Liz shouted through the window. ‘Monica and I are both useless. I hope you’ve looked after the Lavender. Tammy is bound to ask you how it’s doing.’
‘I have,’ said Nick, who surprised himself. ‘It’s positively thriving.’
‘Great. Tammy may demand evidence. She is busy supplying the rest of the neighbourhood with plants at the moment.’ She brought out tea and biscuits on a tray.
‘Oh, in case I forget,’ Liz ran inside and brought out an invitation to Tammy’s party. ‘She has invited Milly and Bradley too. I hope you can all come? She would be so disappointed if you weren’t here.’
‘I’m not sure about Bradley,’ said Nick, ‘you know what teenage boys are like but Milly is much more considerate. I’m sure she’d be happy to come, especially as it doesn’t interfere with her going out later. Bradley on the other hand does his best to stay in bed all day at the weekend. I know he has Heather pulling her hair out. I hope you weren’t too fazed by Marie on Wednesday. She likes to shock.’
‘On the contrary, I thought she was trying to make me feel at home. After all she did feed me the line so I didn’t want to disappoint her.’
Nick laughed. ‘You didn’t. You seem different,’ he said, when he’d stopped laughing.
‘I do? How?’
‘A little distracted, what’s wrong?
‘Oh nothing,’ said Liz, lying through her teeth and feeling a bit unnerved that he was so perceptive. ‘I didn’t sleep very well, that’s all.’
‘I hope you weren’t worrying about me coming over.’
‘No, I’m pleased you’re here. I’ve been really happy lately and that’s the problem.’
‘Being happy is a problem?’ asked Nick confused.
‘No, no, I didn’t mean that. I mean that I feel guilty for being happy.’
‘I’m sure Jim wouldn’t want you to be miserable.’
‘No, I don’t think he would. I’m not so sure about Adam though. I don’t think he likes the idea of me having a male friend.’
‘Liz, I’d be happy to be your friend if that is all you want me to be but I hope you have realised by now that I’d like us to be more than friends.’
Liz smiled as Nick reached over and took her hand. ‘I’d like that too.’ She cupped her hand around his.
‘Well, that’s great. Come on let’s get on with kitting out your studio.’ He pulled her out of the chair and they walked up to the summer house hand in hand.
By the time Tammy and Monica arrived at two o’clock Nick had put up several shelves and moved a lot of the boxes from the garage. Liz decided to leave the tools where they were for now, at least until after the party. While Nick drilled and banged in nails Liz marinated chicken and chopped up salads and vegetables for the barbeque.
‘My, you have been busy,’ said Monica when she came in and saw the table already laid. ‘Here,’ she gave Liz a Tupperware container full of fresh fruit salad, ‘and these.’ She handed over a couple of bottles of white wine. ‘They are nice and cold,’ she added. ‘They’ve been in the fridge since last night.’
‘It’s so nice of you,’ said Liz, ‘but you shouldn’t have.’
‘I helped,’ said Tammy, making sure she got her share of the credit.
‘Well it looks fantastic,’ said Liz, and she gave Tammy a big hug.
‘Hi Nick,’ shouted Tammy as soon as she saw him coming down the steps. ‘How’s the Lavender?’
‘I told you,’ said Liz, as he reached the patio.
‘I have had to re-pot it,’ he said proudly. ‘It’s grown a couple of inches. So have you I think. Are you sure you’re only eleven on your next birthday?’ Tammy laughed. ‘Monica you’re looking great.’ He pecked her on the cheek. ‘Well, are you getting hungry? The barbecue’s ready, shall I start cooking?’
‘Yes please,’ said Tammy. ‘Would you like to hear about my party?’
‘I’d love to,’ said Nick. He was a captive audience after all. Tammy proceeded to tell him who was coming and what they would be doing and the outfit she planned to wear as Nick slapped chicken breasts onto the grill, leaving Monica and Liz to sit at the table with a glass of wine.
‘This is a lovely domestic scene,’ said Monica, smiling mischievously as she sipped her wine.
Liz smiled. ‘The weird thing is it feels perfectly natural and yet every now and then I get this nagging feeling in the back of my mind that makes me feel as if I’m doing something wrong.’
‘Like what?’ said Monica.
‘Oh, I don’t know. I guess I just feel guilty for being alive and happy and probably for having Nick here in this house, Jim’s house.’
Monica reached over and put her hand on Liz’s. ‘Jim’s been dead for how long? Five years? I think you’ve been miserable long enough.’
‘I’m not so sure,’ said Liz. ‘He always joked when he was alive that he’d come back and haunt me when he died. I prayed that he would, I was so desperate to see him.’
‘I think this house needs some happy memories,’ said Monica, ‘but if you really feel too guilty to be happy with Nick here perhaps you should think about moving.’
‘Oh, I don’t think I could ever do that, could I?’
‘Why not? You are a free agent, so to speak.’
Nick came and joined them at the table and Liz poured him a glass of wine.
‘I hope you don’t mind but Tammy and I have been discussing her party and I have volunteered to man the barbecue.’
‘That was cheeky of you,’ Monica said to Tammy.
‘I didn’t ask,’ said Tammy defensively, ‘Nick volunteered.’
‘Yes,’ said Nick, ‘it was completely of my own volition.’ He made a big gesture of winking to Tammy. ‘Besides, I hate pizza.’
‘Told you,’ said Tammy, ‘people prefer burgers.’
‘Are you sure?’ asked Monica.
‘Of course,’ said Nick, ‘it will be my pleasure.’
‘Well that’s settled then, burgers it is.’
The afternoon was warm and breezy, just enough to ruffle the edges of the tablecloth every now and then. The sound of the fountain was drowned out by the chatter and frequent bursts of laughter. Tammy’s party was going to be the highlight of the summer. Liz soaked it all up. It was fantastic to be using the garden again.
‘How about a holiday, are you going anywhere?’ asked Nick.
‘Haven’t thought about it,’ said Liz and Monica together.
‘How about you?’
‘I have a small house in France that I go to sometimes. It’s been a project for a few years. I still haven’t managed to finish it.’
‘How lovely,’ said Monica. ‘Where is it exactly?’
‘It’s in a little village outside Toulouse in the south of France, near to the border with Spain.’
‘Wouldn’t you like to live there?’ asked Tammy.
‘Not on my own,’ said Nick looking at Liz, who blushed.
‘Can we see it?’
‘Tammy!’ Monica moved her head from side to side to indicate to Tammy that asking was rude.
‘I’d love you to see it,’ said Nick. ‘I was thinking of going there later in the year. Perhaps you could come for a holiday?’
‘Can we?’ said Tammy, her big brown eyes pleading with Monica to say yes.
‘We’ll see.’
‘We could go by aeroplane,’ added Tammy.
‘We’ll see,’ said Monica a little more forcefully. Tammy realised that going on would not aid her cause so she changed the subject to art.
‘I’ll show you my drawing of Liz.’ She ran into the kitchen to retrieve Liz’s picture from the fridge. ‘What do you think?’
‘It looks just like her,’ said Nick laughing.
They stayed in the garden until the sun started to go down.
‘Come on Tammy, time to go home I think.’
‘Oh, do we have to?’
‘Yes, we do,’ said Monica. ‘You and I have both got homework and it’s getting late. Thank you both for a lovely afternoon, we’ve really enjoyed it..
‘Me too, ‘said Liz. ‘Thanks for coming. See you both tomorrow.’
Liz and Nick took all the plates and cutlery into the kitchen and put them in the sink. Nick started to run the water.
‘No,’ said Liz, ‘you are my guest. I’ll do that later. I’d like to sit on my veranda and watch the sun go down.’
She flicked the switch in the kitchen which turned on the garden lights. It was only just starting to get dark enough and the chrome columns of the fountain glistened in the mixed rays of spotlights and fading sunlight. Nick poured a couple of glasses of wine and held them both as he led the way to the summer house. He set them down on the table next to the chairs and turned to take Liz’s hand as she walked up the three small steps. She stumbled on the top step and fell forwards. Nick managed to catch her in his arms and pull her up. Her face was now just inches away from his and she was aware of his breathing and his strong arms holding her. There was no hesitation and it seemed to be one fluid motion of gathering her up in his arms and kissing her full on the lips.
She didn’t resist. The wine had softened the edges. She closed her eyes and felt butterflies in the pit of her stomach. She could easily have just let herself go with it, be carried away in the moment, but after the kiss she pulled back, scared by the force of her own feelings.
‘I can’t do this here,’ she said softly. ‘Not in this house, not yet. This is a little fast for me.’ She was now aware of her own breathing. ‘I’d like to take it slowly if you don’t mind. It’s been a long time since I have even kissed anyone,’ she said eventually, ‘let alone…’ She didn’t finish the sentence.
‘There’s no hurry. I just haven’t met anyone in a long time that I have felt so at ease with.’ He held her hands in his. ‘I’m not going anywhere Liz.’
She smiled. She was relieved. She felt as though she could relax now the first kiss was over. She couldn’t deny the chemistry between them and knew the first kiss would not be the last.
They sat on the veranda, drinking wine and talking way past midnight, Liz snuggled up to Nick on the chair next to his.
* * *
Back in Bury St Edmunds Adam was tossing and turning. Georgina would be so angry if they didn’t move to New York. Would she leave him? On the other hand, Sasha definitely did not want to go. He hadn’t even discussed it with Leo and deep in his heart he knew he was putting it off because Leo loved his school and his friends. He probably felt the same as Sasha. He would have to speak to the children in the morning.
Then there’s mum. Georgina was right, he had been a lousy son, aided and abetted by his scheming wife who only ever did anything that suited her. She certainly didn’t go out of her way to let Liz into their lives but she was his mum and he should have behaved better. She might never have even met this Nick if he had looked after her more. He looked over at Georgina who was sleeping serenely. He did love her but he was under no illusions about her.
What if he didn’t take the job? Would it damage his career? Would there be other offers? He had planned to retire at fifty five at the latest, buy a yacht and maybe sail around the Med. The kids would be at university and he would buy them a flat each.
And then there’s mum. What to do about mum.
* * *
Nick and Liz had fallen asleep in the garden and Nick woke around two o’clock. Liz was fast asleep with her head on his shoulder. He kissed her gently on the forehead, which woke her up.
‘I’d better be off,’ he said. ‘Come on, I need a cab.’
Liz woke up wondering where she was for a second or two. ‘What time is it?’
‘It’s after two, we both fell asleep.’
‘Sorry,’ said Liz, ‘it must be the wine.’
She shivered with the cold and Nick put his arm around her. They walked back to the house with Nick’s arm still around her shoulders to keep her warm. The garden looked magical with the spotlights illuminating the plants and the fountain and the fairy lights twinkling on the pergola.
The mini cab promised to be there in ten minutes.
‘Thanks Nick,’ said Liz.
‘For what?’ asked Nick.
‘For being patient with me. I love being with you too.’
‘I told you Liz, there’s no hurry.’
The cab company rang Nick’s mobile to indicate that they were outside in the street.
‘I’ll call you tomorrow.’
She watched him walk up the path. She was grateful that he hadn’t kissed her again, although part of her wanted him to.