Kyle. Leah’s arms tightened around the baby, and her heart quickened. She averted her gaze because, if she met Kyle’s eyes, he might read the guilt in hers. Or worse yet, remember the part she’d played that dreadful night. After he’d left town years ago, she’d buried her fear that he’d discover the truth. Now he was here in this kitchen, close enough to touch. Leah struggled to control her trembling, to put the past out of her mind, to concentrate on the darling baby in her arms.
Although she avoided meeting Kyle’s eyes, she couldn’t help noting his pursed lips. He appeared to be pinching back a retort, and his nose had wrinkled when she’d put the onion poultice on baby Aaron’s chest. She suspected Kyle’s expression wasn’t only a reaction to the strong smell. Definitely not a good sign. The last thing they needed was a doctor who didn’t understand Amish ways.
His half-hearted greeting proved he felt as wary of her as she did of him. Having Kyle Miller back in the community would be difficult enough, but having to work with him during deliveries would be torture. Any moment he might glance at her and…
The baby emitted a phlegmy cough, and Leah tipped him upright and patted his back to ease his breathing. Beside her, Kyle’s body tensed as if he wanted to snatch Aaron from her. Leah swished past him before he could make a move and headed for the cradle in the back bedroom.
When she reached the room, she shut the door behind her to give herself some time to recover. Her breathing was as labored as the baby’s. Kyle hadn’t looked at her closely. If he did, would he remember that time their eyes locked and both their worlds changed forever? Leah didn’t want to take that chance.
From the brief glimpse she had of him, Kyle looked too slick and polished to return to a small farming community. Why would he even want to come back after what happened? Although the Amish would never hold his past against him, few in their area would visit his office or invite him into their homes if he refused to accept their way of life.
As much as she wanted to see Dr. Hess enjoy retirement—he worked much too hard—Kyle Miller was the last person she’d want to take his place. The first chance she got, she’d recommend that Dr. Hess find a different assistant. Seeing Kyle again made her realize she couldn’t work with him. Not only did they have totally different ideas on how to handle illness, but being around him sent waves of guilt over her. Kyle might never remember what she’d done, but the shame of that night was burned indelibly into her memory.
Rather than settling baby Aaron in the cradle, Leah sank onto the nearby bed and cuddled him close. For years, she’d yearned to have a family of her own, but holding babies like this had been her only chance to hug little ones. Blinking back tears, she patted Aaron’s back as he coughed. Now that she’d started dating Ben, she’d begun to hope someday he’d be her husband and they’d have a family. That possibility could become a reality…if only they could start agreeing on things.
Ben didn’t want her being a midwife, but Leah was determined to show him she could make their relationship and her career work. So far, they’d crossed a few hurdles and managed to stay together. The fall months would be busier than usual with weddings, babies, and illnesses, making it a challenge to find time to be together.
“Leah?” Dr. Hess’s voice boomed through the house, and she jumped, startling baby Aaron, whose thin wail came out choked.
She lifted him to her shoulder, breathing shallowly to avoid getting a strong whiff of the onion, and rubbed his back. “Be right there,” she called back as she waited for Aaron’s spate of coughing to subside. When he’d quieted, she propped him in the cradle to make it easier for him to breathe. She had no desire to subject herself to Kyle’s withering looks or take a chance he might recognize her.
When she entered the kitchen, Kyle’s clenched fists and tight jaw made it clear he was holding back anger. Anger he probably wanted to direct at her for disregarding his advice about the baby. She hoped Dr. Hess would explain about Amish ways. Kyle, though, didn’t look as if he’d listen.
Leah nibbled on her lower lip. She had no right to judge him. She herself had been guilty of the same fault. She wanted her own way too. She’d ignored his advice about taking the baby to the hospital, believing her poultice was the correct solution. Talk about hochmut! If she hadn’t been so prideful, she would have considered Kyle’s recommendation as well as his feelings. Instead she’d not only dismissed it, she’d pointed out how wrong he was. Leah’s conscience insisted she apologize, but the stubborn part of her refused to give in.
Before her better side could convince her to do the right thing, Dr. Hess rose from the table and beckoned to Kyle.
“We’d better get going. I have a lot to do and plenty to show you.” The doctor picked up his black leather bag and smiled at Leah. “Kyle’s only here for three days, but when he comes back, I’ll make sure to get the two of you together so you can get to know each other.”
Kyle looked as if that were the last thing he’d ever want to do. Not that she blamed him. Maybe being here had made it clear this job didn’t suit him. Perhaps she’d never see him again, which Leah would consider a great blessing.
* * *
Kyle held his tongue until the front door closed behind him and the Hesses. “You’re leaving that baby here?”
Dr. Hess slowed and put a hand on Kyle’s arm. “The Amish around here prefer chiropractors. They rarely consult a doctor unless it’s a medical emergency.”
“Like this baby?”
Dr. Hess sighed. “I know most people would rush that child to the hospital, but the Amish don’t do things the way we Englischers do.”
“If the parents plan to ignore what you tell them to do, why do they bother to call you in the first place?” In his worry for the baby, Kyle’s words came out more sharply than he’d intended.
“Actually, the parents weren’t the ones who contacted me. Leah asked me to check the baby. She was convinced he had pneumonia.”
“The midwife diagnoses people?”
Esther chuckled. “I don’t imagine all midwives do, but Leah’s different. She’s been running her family’s natural products store for years. She has an extensive knowledge of herbs and alternative medicine.”
Kyle’s fear for the baby’s health boiled over and spilled out into his words. “So she not only diagnoses diseases, she recommends quack remedies?”
“I wouldn’t call her treatments ‘quack.’ In fact,” Esther said, “she’s quite knowledgeable. By the time Martin gets called in, she often has the cases pretty well in hand.”
“Esther’s right.” Dr. Hess flashed his wife a loving smile. “One other thing you need to know is that the Amish come to me for a diagnosis, but most of them ignore the prescriptions I write.”
Kyle stopped and stared at him. “What’s the point of going to a doctor if you’re going to ignore the advice?”
“They mainly want to confirm the diagnosis. Then they’ll get products at Leah’s family’s store to treat whatever I tell them they have.”
“That’s crazy.”
Dr. Hess reached his car, opened the trunk, and set his bag inside before he turned and pinned Kyle with a look that pierced his soul. “I believe in honoring God by doing my job and leaving the rest up to Him.”
Kyle squirmed and looked away. God had ignored his pleas for his mother’s life, so it seemed foolhardy to trust Him—or the Amish midwife—with patients’ lives.
When Kyle didn’t answer him, Dr. Hess continued, “You might be surprised at how well the natural treatments work. Some of the remedies the Amish use might seem odd.”
“Yes, indeed,” Esther said. “Like BEMER treatments or reflexology or—”
Her husband held up his hand. “Maybe we’d better not overwhelm the boy with that information right now.” He and Esther exchanged glances that seemed to convey deep messages between them.
Esther’s lips quirked. “You’re right, Martin. We don’t want to scare him off.”
She needn’t worry about that. If he hadn’t already planned to turn them down, his encounter with the Amish midwife would have been enough to change his mind. Hearing the patients would ignore his advice only confirmed his decision.
Dr. Hess opened the passenger door and looked at Kyle. “Why don’t you ride with me so we can discuss some of our plans?” He turned to his wife. “If you’ll be all right, dear? You just took that long drive to the airport.”
“Of course I will. Don’t worry about me, Martin. I’m not tired.”
“I just want to be sure you’re safe.” He moved closer to her, took her hand, and squeezed it. “You’re precious to me.”
Esther beamed up at her husband. “I pray God will watch over all of us as well as the Fisher family, especially the unborn baby and little Aaron.”
He bent and planted a gentle kiss on her forehead. “Till we meet again.”
Kyle turned away, a lump blocking his throat. He had no idea how long those two had been married, but they acted like young lovers. His heart longed for a relationship like that. A relationship he’d never have. Once he’d loved someone with his whole heart, but anger and carelessness had destroyed both their lives.
“Are you ready, Kyle?” Dr. Hess’s words startled him from his grief.
After he and Dr. Hess got into the car, the doctor turned on the engine but motioned for his wife to pull out ahead of them. “That way we can keep an eye on her.”
“You don’t trust her driving?”
After turning a shocked glance in Kyle’s direction, Dr. Hess said with a touch of sternness, “Esther’s a wonderful driver. You’ve ridden with her, so you should know.”
“Yes, she is. But when you said you were keeping an eye on her, you were worried—”
“Cars can break down. Drunk drivers can cause accidents.”
The word accident stabbed Kyle, and he winced.
“As a doctor, I’ve realized how fragile life can be. And if it’s in my power, I want to protect my wife.”
Kyle pressed his fingers against his eyelids to ease the stinging. He certainly knew how fragile life could be.
Dr. Hess continued, “I consider every moment with Esther as a gift.”
His throat tight, Kyle asked, “How long have you been married?”
“We’ll be celebrating our forty-sixth anniversary this spring.” Dr. Hess kept his gaze trained on the rutted lane as they bounced along. “Which means I’m no longer a spry chicken. That’s why I need some help in the practice. Esther’s been by my side all this time, but we had to be apart for many holidays, anniversaries, birthdays, and other special occasions. And I can’t count the number of dates I’ve broken.”
After they pulled out onto the main highway, Dr. Hess stayed right behind his wife, even though she drove well under the speed limit.
“When you’re the only doctor in an area like this,” he continued, “you make a lot of sacrifices. Esther’s made all of them and more. She deserves my full time and attention now. That’s why I’m ready to hand over the practice to a deserving young doctor.” He shot Kyle a look.
I’m not the deserving young doctor you’re looking for. But Kyle couldn’t bring himself to blurt that out and destroy Dr. Hess’s hopes. Instead, he deflected the conversation. “I still can’t believe you’re giving your practice away. Why would anyone do that?”
“I have my reasons.” Dr. Hess gripped the steering wheel even more tightly. “I did tell you the main one when I called.”
Yes, something about God. A reason Kyle had quickly tuned out. But there had to be more to it than that. Later, Kyle would press him to discover the other more plausible reasons. Perhaps his business wasn’t doing well, or it was deeply in debt. No one just gave away a thriving practice.