Leah opened the store the next morning, dealt with the mail, placed some weekly orders, stocked a few shelves, and completed the inventory in one aisle. She’d just finished taking lunch up to Mamm when the two Englischers from the previous day arrived within a few minutes of each other.
“I’m so sorry I wasn’t here yesterday,” Leah said as she fetched their orders. “I had an emergency delivery.”
The blond swished her shoulder-length hair back from her face. “No worries. I don’t know how you manage to run a store when you’re a midwife.”
The older woman behind her sniffed. “Yes, your family should get someone else to cover for you when you’re gone.”
Leah winced as she sorted through the bags on the To-Be-Picked-Up shelves. Working in the shop should be her brother Joel’s job, but he’d rebelled during Rumspringa and had never joined the church. He’d fought with Daed and wanted nothing to do with the family or their Amish community. Daed had insisted on Leah taking Joel’s place at the store. Her heart was with midwifery, but she needed to help her family. She’d only been supposed to work part-time hours, but with Mamm’s MS keeping her in bed most days and Daed’s full-time job, she’d ended up running the shop single-handedly. They’d discussed closing it, but too many people in the community depended on their products.
The phone rang soon after the customers left. Sharon’s breathless voice came over the line. “If you can come over, I’m going to turn a breech baby. It would be a good learning experience for you.”
“I’d love to be there. Where are you?” Leah jotted down the address. Then she locked the register and hurried to the door. She screeched to a halt. Ben. She needed to leave him a note. She wished he wouldn’t come all the way over here only to find her gone, but she had no way to contact him.
Grabbing a piece of paper, she jotted a quick message:
Ben, I’m so sorry to have missed you yesterday. Sharon couldn’t be reached so I was needed at the Fishers’. Sharon called and wants me to meet her at another patient’s house today. I should be back by early evening. Leah
After folding the message shut, she printed his name in bold letters and taped it to the door. She set the return time to five p.m.—something she’d forgotten to do yesterday—and turned the store sign to CLOSED. Then she rushed out to her buggy and took off for the Groffs’ house. She hoped she wouldn’t be gone that long, but Sharon liked her to stay after all observations and deliveries to discuss what Leah had learned and what she could improve on next time.
She’d been hoping to learn to turn a breech baby. Sharon had described several different procedures a few weeks ago while Leah took some general notes. She’d also read about it in the informal booklet Sharon had put together for her assistants, but actually seeing it and participating was the best way to learn.
* * *
Kyle rejoiced that today was his last day in Lancaster. They had a busy schedule planned, and the doctor’s long list of appointments wouldn’t give them time for any in-depth talks. Kyle planned to confine all their interactions to discussing patients and symptoms rather than talking about his future plans or about God.
He’d been on edge since his conversation with Esther last evening. He’d survived their mealtime prayer, but he wanted to avoid a discussion about religion, so he steered the conversation away from talk about God for the rest of the evening. Although references to God peppered Esther’s conversation, she hadn’t asked any pointed questions about what he believed. She evidently assumed they shared the same faith.
As the evening progressed and she explained what she and Martin had planned for him, Kyle’s reluctance to disappoint her grew with each passing minute. They’d both worked hard for so many years, so they deserved to retire.
Esther leaned forward in her chair. “I can’t tell you how much this means to me. I’m excited that we can give the practice to you because your mother—” Her rapid flow of words stopped abruptly. “That is, well”—she seemed to be floundering to finish her sentence—“she was…um, a wonderful woman. A very wonderful woman. It was heartbreaking when she passed on. We always wanted to do something to help you. And Caleb, of course.”
Esther rattled on without pausing for breath. “We also chose you not only because you used to live here but because Martin knows you were a wonderful student and thinks you’re the right person to trust with his practice.”
Kyle stared down at his clenched fists. How could he say no to them after all they’d done for him? And he’d be turning down a chance to pay off his med school loans and Emma’s medical expenses. He’d been shocked to discover the Amish didn’t believe in having insurance. Instead, Emma’s family, with the help of the Amish community, had paid her extensive medical and rehab bills. His carelessness had depleted their funds. Funds that could have been used to help other families in need. Although they’d insist he owed them nothing, his conscience wouldn’t allow him to escape financial responsibility. It might take years, or even decades, but he’d determined to pay back every penny.
When he didn’t answer, Esther filled in the silence with rapid chatter. “We don’t want you to feel obligated, of course, if this isn’t where God is leading you. Martin and I have been praying, and I’m sure you’ve been doing the same, but we’ll support whatever decision you make with God’s guidance.”
Participating in the conversation increased Kyle’s feelings of being a fraud. He hadn’t been praying and had no desire to do so. Maybe he could tell the doctor God was leading him elsewhere. To a fellowship at a big city hospital. Their hopes would be dashed when he said no. Especially Esther’s. She anticipated spending time with Martin, doing many of the things they’d always hoped to do together, but they’d both accept his answer as God’s will.
Kyle couldn’t bring himself to lie to them, though. If he told them the truth about losing his faith, she and the doctor would probably hammer him with Scripture verses to bring him back to God. Might they change their minds about giving him the practice if they knew he’d lost his faith?
After he’d gone to bed last night, Kyle tossed and turned, weighing all the pros and cons, but despite the many reasons drawing him to stay, many more were urging him to leave. The long hours and hectic schedule of med school had kept him too busy to dwell on his mistakes, failures, and losses. In the same way, a challenging fellowship might prevent him from agonizing over the past. The slower-paced lifestyle here would force him to face his previous actions—and his guilt.
Yet he still hadn’t come up with the courage—or the words—to tell the Hesses his final decision. It might be easier to say no to Dr. Hess when they were alone in the car, driving to the airport tonight. With darkness surrounding them, he wouldn’t have to read the sadness in the doctor’s eyes. And he wouldn’t have to see Esther’s hopes dashed. Besides, darkness made it easier to hide lies and guilt.
“Kyle?” Esther’s soft voice startled him back to the office, where he’d joined Dr. Hess for the day. “Would you be willing to drive my car to the Stoltzfus Natural Products Store to pick up some prenatal vitamins for a patient who’ll be coming in later today? She can’t afford them, so we’ll pay for them. Have them put the items on our personal account.”
Still groggy after his sleepless night, Kyle took the list, money, directions, and car keys she handed him. Was there no end to the Hesses’ generosity? He’d seen Esther lower charges for doctor visits for several uninsured people today, they handed out medicines they’d paid for as free samples, they bought items for a needy mother, and they planned to turn their practice over to a virtual stranger. What would motivate that kind of giving?
The cold wind outdoors drove the last of the cobwebs from Kyle’s fogged brain. Didn’t Leah’s family own a natural products store? Most likely this was the same one. After all, how many of those stores would be located in this rural area? He hoped Leah wouldn’t be there. He had no desire to spar with her again. Or did he? Last night at dinner, he’d imagined arguing with her would be fun.
When he turned into the parking lot, a huge delivery truck blocked the entrance. Kyle swerved around it and parked near a side fence. Hunching into his coat, he crossed the parking lot and rounded the delivery truck to find the driver pacing the sidewalk.
Kyle headed toward the glass entrance door.
“Wouldn’t bother if I were you,” the driver said. “Nobody’s here.”
“But it says it’s open from nine to six today.” Kyle glanced at the sign and checked his watch. “It’s only three.”
The driver pointed to the CLOSED sign and the clock, with its hands pointing to five o’clock. “Evidently, she doesn’t plan to get back until five. What am I supposed to do?”
“Five? I was supposed to pick up a few things.”
The driver stamped his feet and blew on his reddened hands. “They knew I was coming today. We prescheduled it. I have other deliveries to do, and I need to get this order off the truck so I can reach the boxes for my other delivery.”
Kyle longed to get out of the wind, but he felt sorry for the man. “Can you leave the packages by the door?”
“I sometimes do, but this order has a bunch of glass bottles filled with liquid. They could freeze and shatter.”
“How many are there? Would they fit in the car over there?”
The driver looked at him like he was crazy. “Sure, man, I’ll just load the boxes into some stranger’s car.”
Oh, right. Kyle should have thought of that. “I’m Dr. Hess’s assistant, and I’m running errands for his wife.” He held out the list Esther had printed on an office notepad.
The man’s suspicious look didn’t change. “I do deliveries for the doctor, and I heard he was getting an assistant. I also recognize Mrs. Hess’s car. It’s rather distinct.” He snickered a little but then returned to his judgmental stare. “How do I know you didn’t steal it?”
“If you know the Hesses, you could call them and ask.”
“Guess if I don’t, I’ll be stuck out here on the road for another two hours tonight.” He slid through the numbers on his cell, clicked on one, and held the phone to his ear. “Nobody’s picking up.”
“Maybe try one more time?” Kyle had no idea why he was being so persistent. This delivery wasn’t his responsibility, but maybe hanging around the Hesses was restoring the charitable part of himself he’d buried years ago.
Yes, and you have a soft spot for the girl who works here. Maybe you’re hoping it’ll give you a chance to see her again.
Kyle shook his head to dislodge those thoughts. Leah got under his skin, and the only thing he wanted to do was confront her about her dangerous practices.
Liar, his conscience whispered.
Beside him, the driver had reached Esther and was questioning her. A short while later, he clicked off his phone. “Mrs. Hess promises she’ll see that Leah gets the delivery, and she vouched for you.”
Fighting the wind, Kyle helped the man pile the boxes into the roomy old trunk and onto the car seats. By the time they were done, boxes were stacked ceiling high on the floor and across the backseat, except for a small opening he could peer through. They filled the bench seat next to Kyle so tightly he could barely squeeze into the driver’s seat.
After everything had been wedged inside, the driver made Kyle print his phone number on a form and took his driver’s license information. Then he shook Kyle’s hand. “I really appreciate this, man.”
“No problem.” Well, maybe shifting would be, but at least the old-fashioned shift was on the steering wheel instead of the center console. His arms tucked tightly against his sides, Kyle maneuvered the big old car out of the parking lot and onto the street. He drove a bit more slowly than usual so none of the boxes would shift.
When he arrived at the Hesses’, Esther came out on the porch. “You can pull into the garage,” she called, “and I’ll turn on the heater. We sometimes keep medical supplies in there.”
Once the car was stowed and Kyle had washed up, Esther sent him into the living room to wait for dinner. Again, a delicious aroma perfumed the air, making Kyle hungry. He relaxed on the couch, relieved he’d soon be headed home.
After dinner, Esther asked, “Would you mind taking those boxes back to the shop before you and Martin leave for the airport? Martin needs to run out to see a patient. I don’t know if I could see over such high stacks.”
“Sure.” Kyle welcomed any distraction from composing his no-thank-you-I-can’t-take-the-offer explanation. He comforted himself with the thought that plenty of young doctors like him would gladly take the offer. But the idea of driving over to the store switched his thoughts to Leah. If she worked as a midwife, most likely others in the family ran the store. Part of him hoped he wouldn’t see her again, but a small part, one he tried to squash, hoped he would.