During the whirlwind last days of covering for Dr. Patel, other opportunities for his future pushed Dr. Hess’s offer from Kyle’s mind. All the possibilities he considered would move him closer to his dreams, and he weighed the pros and cons of each. While comparing advantages and disadvantages, he never included the Lancaster practice on the list, although from time to time the pull of Leah’s presence filled him with longing and the debt of gratitude he owed the Hesses filled him with regret.
After days of deliberation, he settled on his final fellowship choices, and he accepted another position as a covering physician at one of the top hospitals in the country beginning in January. Now he needed to let Dr. Hess know his plans. That call weighed on him. How could he explain his decision? Instead of feeling lighter and relieved by his choice, guilt gnawed at him. He cared about the doctor and his wife. Hurting them troubled his conscience, but his most important consideration had to be for his future.
Not a day went by, though, that he didn’t think of Leah. Of course, he assured himself he was only concerned about her health. Several times he picked up the phone to call Dr. Hess to see if he’d check on her, but then he’d also need to give the doctor an answer about taking over his practice.
A few times Kyle even toyed with the idea of calling the natural products shop to hear Leah’s voice. He even programmed the shop number into his phone. He could ask if she’d gone to the doctor and say he wondered if his diagnosis was correct. He jerked his thoughts from Leah. What was wrong with him?
After Kyle finished his final day of work, he went back to his apartment and crashed. Eighteen hours later, he woke, groggy and hungry. He’d give himself a few days off to relax, and then he’d start on the fellowship applications.
The phone rang in the middle of the night. He fumbled around on his bedside table to find it in the dark and caught it right before his answering machine clicked on.
“Kyle?” The woman sounded close to tears.
He managed a hmm, but his brain hadn’t kicked in yet. Who would be calling at this time of night?
“Martin had a heart attack. I’m at the hospital with him now. Is there any way you could fly here and take over his practice while he recovers?”
Martin? Kyle fought to process the name, the request. Slowly, the fog in his brain dissipated, and answers kicked in. Lancaster. Dr. Hess. Leah. No, not Leah. “The doctor had a heart attack?”
“Yes, he’s in the ICU. We’ll pay whatever it costs if you can fly here to help.”
The last thing Kyle wanted to do was go back there, but how could he say no? Now was not the time to inform her he didn’t plan to take over the practice. She had enough to deal with. “I’ll catch the first flight out.”
“Thank you. You don’t know what this means to us. I’ll ask our neighbor to unlock the office, and I’ll pray for safe travels.”
Kyle hesitated. He wanted to comfort her by saying he’d be praying for her husband, but he had no business asking God for favors. “I hope everything goes well for Martin.”
“It’s in God’s hands.”
Kyle’s stomach clenched remembering praying for his mother. He’d hate to see that outcome for the doctor. He hurried through the good-byes and flicked on the light. So much for getting a good night’s sleep. And there went his vacation.
For now, though, he needed to book a flight and pack. He reached for his computer and found a flight leaving in three hours. If the doctor had patients first thing in the morning, he’d be late, but he should be able to handle appointments from ten o’clock on.
After throwing his things into a suitcase, he texted Esther his arrival time and said he’d get a rental car. Then he sped to the airport and made it in time to check his bag, wind his way through security, and board.
Too tense to sleep, Kyle sat rigid in his seat. He’d been working with skilled doctors, so he always had someone he could ask about his diagnoses if he was uncertain. How could he handle the office on his own? What if he made a mistake? Misdiagnosed someone? Gave out the wrong prescription? Perhaps most of his patients would be Amish and would check with Leah for herbal remedies.
Kyle didn’t want to admit to himself that the main reason he couldn’t sleep wasn’t only fear. His logical brain told him he was making a mistake, but his emotions refused to listen. Part of him danced with excitement knowing he’d be seeing Leah again.
* * *
Now that Joel had taken charge of the shop, Leah could spend more time making breakfast, so she whipped up batter for pancakes, her brother’s favorite breakfast. She opened the kitchen door to hear when he came in. She’d finished serving Mamm and Daed when the phone in the shop rang. She rushed to answer it, hoping Joel wasn’t canceling.
Esther Hess said a quick hello before plunging into her reason for calling. She explained about Martin’s heart attack and added, “I’ve been with Martin all night. I need to cancel the appointments before ten o’clock, and I remembered your next-door neighbor has an early appointment. Could you let Barbara Beiler know?”
“Of course.” Barbara didn’t have a phone, so they were used to taking messages for her. “I’ll run right over now. Is there anything I can do for you? If you want to stay with Martin, I could have Joel drive me to the office, and I could cancel the rest of the appointments.”
“Oh, would you be able to do that?” The relief in Esther’s voice made Leah glad she’d offered.
“I’d be happy to. As soon as Joel arrives, I’ll head over. And I’ll be praying.”
“Thank you, dear. We both appreciate that. Mary Esh next door has a key, but the records room also has a keypad.” After giving Leah the code to open that door, Esther hung up.
Joel usually arrived early. If he did, maybe he could drive her over to the office to give her enough time to warn the morning patients. Leah went into the house to inform her parents and ran next door to let Barbara know. Then she waited by the shop door for Joel to pull in. Before he could turn off the engine, she waved and hurried over. He agreed to take her, and she arrived at the office before eight thirty.
She had no trouble canceling the Englisch patients, but she was unable to reach some of the Amish ones. She’d wait for them and tell them in person. Esther had sounded so worried Leah hadn’t thought to ask her what arrangements had been made for the patients who were coming in after ten.
While she waited, she sorted through the files Esther had stacked on the table in the long, narrow file room. Leah matched them to the appointment list from the reception desk. The first stack held the morning’s patient files. The one next to it contained afternoon records. Each one had been placed in order.
A car pulled into the driveway, and someone banged on the back door. Regular patients always came to the front door. Leah hesitated to answer. Perhaps it was a delivery, though. She lifted the blind enough to peek out, and her heart stuttered. Kyle stood on the doorstep. Why hadn’t Esther mentioned him?
Kyle appeared as stunned to see her as she was to see him. Their eyes locked, and Leah might have gazed at him all day if he hadn’t mouthed, May I come in?
She couldn’t believe she’d left him standing in the cold while she stared at him. Her face burned, and with stiff, nervous fingers, she fumbled to unlock the door. “I’m sorry. I, um, wasn’t expecting you.”
“I wasn’t expecting you either. I assumed one of Esther’s neighbors would be here.” He didn’t sound too happy.
“I volunteered to come over so she could stay with Martin.” Leah hastened to assure him, “Don’t worry. I won’t be here long. I only need to wait for two more Amish patients I couldn’t reach.”
“Oh. I, um…” Kyle hesitated, then said abruptly, “I need to hang up my coat.”
Was she mistaken, or did he look disappointed? Was he counting on some assistance for the day? She wasn’t a nurse, but she could act as a receptionist. She followed him into the hallway as he headed for the doctor’s office. “If you need help, I could stay.”
“I appreciate that, but I don’t want you to close up the shop on my account.” Kyle kept his back to her as he set his suitcase on a chair, removed his coat, and hung it in the small closet.
The muscles rippling under his sweater distracted her so much Leah struggled to put together a coherent sentence. “The shop?” Oh, right. Kyle didn’t know about the changes. “I’m not working at the shop anymore.”
“You’re not?” Kyle turned. “You closed it?”
Leah couldn’t decide which was more unnerving—staring at his back or meeting his eyes. Definitely his eyes. She broke contact and took a deep breath to calm her fluttering nerves. Her conscience needled her. She had no business entertaining feelings like this for another man, when she’d committed to courting Ben. Being attracted to Kyle was wrong, but him being an Englischer only made things worse.
When she didn’t answer, Kyle repeated his question.
Leah pushed her attraction to him from her mind to focus on the conversation, but she had trouble coming up with more than a one-word answer. “No, no.”
“So you didn’t sell it?”
“No.” Now she was sounding like a parrot. She needed to get a grip on herself. “My brother is running the store now.”
Kyle leaned over and clicked the locks on his silver metal suitcase. Leah turned her head as he opened the lid. Although she was curious, she shouldn’t be looking at his clothing or other private items. Plastic crinkled, but she fought the temptation to peek until the locks clicked into place.
Kyle donned his white lab coat before speaking again. “I guess that allows you more time for being a midwife?” He didn’t sound particularly happy about that.
Leah tried to tune back in to the conversation instead of watching his strong, competent hands button the lab coat. “Yes, yes, it does.”
“I’m not sure about this.” Kyle motioned toward his chest.
Nothing wrong with his broad, muscular chest that she could see. “It looks fine to me,” Leah blurted out and then wished she could stuff the words back into her mouth.
“Well, some hospitals banned these because of germs”—he tugged on his lab coat—“but I noticed Dr. Hess wears one in the office, so I figured patients here would prefer it.”
“Germs?” Leah’s voice squeaked. Her thoughts hadn’t been on medicine. Or lab coats, for that matter.
“Don’t worry. Some recent studies have refuted that, and I had all my coats packed in plastic to keep them as germ-free as possible after they’re laundered. But they can pick up germs during exams.”
Leah swallowed hard before answering to keep her tone normal. “I’m sure they’ll be fine.” One look at him, and the last thing on anyone’s mind would be germs. Or was she the only one he affected that way?
A buzzing filled the hall. The front door. Someone had entered the waiting room. Leah hurried out to greet the patient. But Kyle’s voice followed her down the hall. “If you could stay for a short while until I get set up, I’d appreciate it.”
“Of course,” Leah called back. But was she making a big mistake?
* * *
Kyle sat at the desk, taking deep calming breaths. He’d been nervous enough about doing this solo, but seeing Leah again…
He had to compose himself before the first patient. Deep breathing didn’t help. Why had he asked her to stay? He’d have enough to handle with seeing patients without having to fight his attraction to Leah.
Jumping to his feet, he paced back and forth in the small office. Even that didn’t reduce the tension. Why had he agreed to come back here? What if he harmed a patient?
He jumped when Leah tapped on the door. “I put Elmer Jones in exam room one. He’s had a sore throat for two weeks.”
“Thank you.” With an effort, Kyle slipped a prescription pad into his pocket, put on his professional doctor expression, and strode toward the room, trying to project confidence.
Ahead of him, Leah swished down the hall. He stopped for a moment and closed his eyes until she returned to the waiting room. Shutting thoughts of her from his mind, he opened his eyes, put his hand on the doorknob, and entered the exam room.
The first diagnosis was easy. “I’ll just swab your throat and do a rapid test here. Should have some results for you in ten minutes or so. I’ll be right back.”
Leah had put another patient in the next exam room. He crossed the hall to do a well-baby checkup. Another easy one. Leah had already weighed and measured the baby, which helped. Watching her cradling a baby set his heart thumping. He avoided brushing against her as she held the baby on the exam table.
“Your son is very healthy,” Kyle reassured the young mother, who smiled at him. “I take it he’s a good eater. He’s gained weight well since the last visit.” He glanced at the chart again. “Zander does need one shot this time.”
When the mother grimaced, Leah asked, “Would you prefer to hold him here or shall I?”
The mother stood. “I can do it. Thank you.”
Kyle wouldn’t have thought to ask, but Leah’s caring nature had made the mother feel more comfortable. She’d make a good nurse. Too bad she didn’t have her training.
After he gave the infant the shot, Leah and the mother redressed the baby, and he ducked back into the first exam room to check the results. “It’s strep throat, Mr. Jones. I’ll write you a prescription.” He scribbled a prescription for antibiotics on the tablet.
As they passed in the hall for the next few patients, Kyle imagined Leah was one of the nurses at the hospital. He adopted a brusque tone to keep his distance, but even that barrier didn’t hold back his feelings. He was grateful for her assistance, but keeping his interest hidden was proving difficult.
By lunchtime, Kyle couldn’t wait for a break. Although he’d been there only two hours, he’d seen seven patients, and he still had all afternoon to slog through. He should send Leah home, but she’d been invaluable all morning. How would he manage without her this afternoon?
He sank into the office chair and lowered his head into his hands. If only he could take a quick nap. Being up most of the night—plus the tension of the morning—had drained him.
“Are you all right?” Leah’s soft voice behind him startled him.
He nodded but didn’t turn. Looking at her when he was so vulnerable would destroy the façade he’d built of a professional doctor.
“I’ll make you some lunch. I found the key to the house in Esther’s desk drawer. I’m sure she won’t mind if I make you a sandwich.”
“You don’t need to do that.”
“You can’t keep going at this pace without something to eat.” Leah walked out the door before he could reply.
She returned a short while later with a thick slice of meatloaf between homemade wheat bread slices slathered with mustard and mayonnaise. She’d loaded the plate with coleslaw, chips, and pickles. A large portion of berry cobbler with whipped cream completed the lunch.
Kyle’s eyes lit up when she carried the food into the office. “Thank you. That looks delicious, but if this is what the doctor’s been eating, no wonder he had a heart attack.”
“I’m guessing the heart attack came from stress. He works much too hard.”
Was that a dig at him? Kyle dipped his fork into the coleslaw so he didn’t have to meet her eyes. Would the doctor have been less stressed if Kyle had accepted his offer earlier? He chewed slowly to avoid responding. Even if she hadn’t meant it as a criticism, he carried the guilt of knowing he planned to turn down Dr. Hess when he needed to retire.
When he lifted his gaze from the plate, Leah seemed to be studying him, but she glanced toward the window. If he hadn’t been mistaken, she’d blushed. He checked to see what had caught her interest behind him, but the blinds were closed. Was she as interested in him as he was in her? If so, it would make it much harder to keep his distance.
Leah reached for his plate as soon as he finished. “I’ll wash that and be right back. The one o’clock patient may come early.”
She planned to stay for the afternoon? Kyle tried to tamp down the happiness flooding through him.
You can’t fall for an Amish girl. It would be a major mistake.
* * *
Leah rushed to the kitchen to wash the dishes. Her hurry to return to the office had less to do with early arrivals and more to do with wanting to be around Kyle.
Dipping her hands into the sudsy water, she scolded herself. Allowing herself to spend time with a man who attracted her betrayed her promise to Ben. She should leave as soon as the first afternoon patient arrived. The less time she was around Kyle, the better.
But who would check in the patients and explain Dr. Hess’s absence? Who would lead them back to the exam rooms, file their charts, and answer the phone? Kyle had too much to do. Leaving him here alone with all this work on his first day would be unfair. No matter what it cost her, she’d help him. After all, she owed Esther and Martin more than she could ever repay. The doctor made frequent house calls now that Mamm couldn’t get around much. And when money was tight, he’d accepted eggs and milk as payment. Helping to keep their practice running would serve as a tiny repayment. She just had to keep Kyle from discovering her feelings.
The afternoon went even more smoothly than the morning, but Leah breathed a sigh of relief when she escorted the last patient back to an exam room. She tidied the waiting room, straightened the reception desk, and pulled files for the next day and placed them in two neat stacks the way Esther had. Then she waited for the final patient to settle his bill and exit. She locked the cash box in a drawer in the file room and used the codes Esther had given her to lock that door and the storeroom that held sample medicines.
Kyle remained holed up in the doctor’s office. Joel would be here soon. Leah overcame her eagerness to get away—to escape, really—from her fascination with Kyle, but she had to make sure he had the codes to the building.
She tapped on the heavy mahogany door, and a faint come in drifted out. When she entered, Kyle had his back to the door. He lifted one of the wooden slats in the blinds to peer out into the backyard. Through the slit, trees lifted leafless branches to the overcast sky.
“Are you all right?” she asked.
“I’m fine.” His clipped tone indicated he’d rather not talk.
Leah couldn’t go without assuring herself he’d be all right. “Esther has a few leftovers in the refrigerator. I could heat something for your dinner.”
“I’ll be fine. I know how to use a microwave. All I’ve been eating most days for the past few years are containers of reheated leftovers.”
“That’s a shame.” Leah couldn’t imagine what it would be like to eat rewarmed food almost every night. “Don’t you ever have home-cooked meals?”
Kyle made a sound that resembled a snort. “Other than the delicious meals I had here at the Hesses’, I can’t recall any. Few of us make it through med school and residencies without relying on takeout, cafeteria meals, and leftovers.”
Leah started to reply that it was sad, but she closed her mouth. He didn’t seem to be the type to appreciate pity. Maybe she could bring him a meal tomorrow. Nobody should work hard all day and not have a hearty supper afterward. “Joel’s probably waiting, so I need to go. Would you like me to come tomorrow?”
Kyle dropped the blind slat he’d been holding but stayed facing the window. “I don’t think—”
“Someone should be in the office to greet patients and answer the phone.” Why was she pushing this when he clearly didn’t want her here? Still, she couldn’t leave him alone. She’d been busy the whole day, and so had he. He might not realize everything she’d done today, but no way could he handle all those responsibilities in addition to seeing patients.
“I suppose.” His response was so lackluster Leah regretted offering. Still, it wouldn’t be right to let Dr. Hess’s patients down. She should do this for his sake.
Leah tried to ignore the niggling question in the back of her mind. So you aren’t doing this to spend more time around Kyle?