When I find myself getting caught up in the materialistic, shallow stuff that can infiltrate our day-to-day lives, I try to remind myself of this: we come into this world with nothing and leave with nothing. Spending your life building up a financial fortune without sharing it or using it to make a difference would be, in my view, selling yourself short. We need to see the big and beautiful picture, and I think it’s our duty to create something bold and powerful that we can leave behind.

We all have the ability to help others, whether in a big or small way. The same amount of power and strength to be a force for good exists within all of us – it’s just a matter of actually doing something with it. Even if it’s just a little something, it all helps and can make a difference.

And when we give to charity or help someone or something in need, often we get soul-filling and healing actions in return. This shouldn’t be our sole intention, but often in giving, we do gain much-needed perspective. And that kick up the backside reminds us how lucky we are, and that we should be grateful for all we have.

Giving is empowering and strengthening, and can play a part in curing loneliness, as part of giving is connecting. Not just with a person or a charity, but with ourselves and our values.

I also think that when you give, you have to give unconditionally – don’t have any expectations, just give happily and step back. That’s the most admirable way of giving to me: privately. If you expect praise, fame or even appreciation when you give, you aren’t giving wholeheartedly, and you’re setting yourself up for disappointment. The blessing in charity is in giving with no strings attached.

And helping someone or giving to charity doesn’t need to necessarily be about giving money. It can also be about giving time or physical help, or helping to create awareness. In fact, giving your time is often more helpful and powerful than handing over cash, especially if you’re able to help to raise money, build connections or develop access to better resources. It’s all about working out where your power lies.

For the $1000 Project, I made the decision to donate the year’s worth of passive income that my portfolio generated to a charity of my choice. I didn’t want the $1000 Project to be purely about financial gains or ‘getting rich’. I wanted to go deeper than this and look at wealth on a more genuine level, where our own financial fortune can be shared with others and help to spread care, connection, love and simple assistance. If we have the ability to change and improve our own lives, why not also do this for others in need?

When I realised that I was adamant about including a charitable purpose in the $1000 Project, it gave me so much joy and energy. After pausing to reflect on my life, I realised how lucky I am to be healthy and educated, and to have loving, caring people around me. Thinking about how grateful I was for everything I had, I decided it was time to put my hand in my pocket and give back. And it wasn’t just about giving money away – I wanted to practise complete mindfulness in how I gave and to do it unconditionally.

I was working hard to earn that money, making so many sacrifices to build the portfolio and its passive income. I knew I’d be taking a big step back by giving the money away, and that I’d possibly be jeopardising my ability to show others the magic of compounding interest, as I wouldn’t have the passive income to keep reinvesting. So I knew that I had to make the decision consciously and wholeheartedly.

Thinking about it like this opened my mind to the possibilities and capabilities that existed within me to give back. And, if anything, it just made me more determined to succeed at the $1000 Project. Knowing that the more passive income I generated, the more I could give, my motivation to save harder and invest more grew stronger.

That decision point, to use this challenge to support a charity of my choice, was a huge aha moment. I realised that the $1000 Project was no longer just about saving and earning, but that I could also build a new and potentially extraordinary legacy with it. And I could help teach people not only to be more mindful about spending, but also to be more mindful about giving back and contributing to their communities, the environment and our world. And this is something that I’m committed to doing for as long as I can. As long as I can financially afford to, every year I will donate 100% of the passive income from the $1000 Project investment portfolio to a different charity of my choice.

I intend to keep the $1000 Project going every year, so that each year, a new and important charity is supported – with the donation getting bigger and bigger each time. This will improve its impact and benefits and allow me to help more causes and more people.

FIND A CAUSE THAT HAS MEANING FOR YOU

Just like we can shop without truly being present, mindlessly putting stuff into our carts without pausing to think if we really need, will use or will even appreciate these items, sometimes we can take the same approach when giving to others. If we give to a charity, we should understand why we picked that particular one, what it means to us and why it’s worth our support. We should also know where that money goes and what amazing work that charity does.

When I started to think about the first charity that I wanted to support, I realised that I had complete freedom to research and select a cause of my choice. This ignited a desire in me to really understand why I would pick a particular charity, and what made that charity so special and personal to me.

The first charity that came to mind was the Gidget Foundation. The Gidget Foundation was started in honour of a young mother who was secretly battling postnatal depression, which not even her closest family members knew about. Sadly, she took her own life. Her family and friends started the foundation to help create a safe haven where other mothers could go for help, support and strategies to help them cope with the passage into and through motherhood.

This is something that I hold close to my heart, as I too suffered from severe post-traumatic stress disorder, which was triggered by postnatal depression when I had Rocco. It was a very dark and frightening period of my life. I felt worthless, like a shell of who I am today, and deep down I just wanted to step away and not be a nuisance to anyone any more.

Fortunately, the right people picked up on the warning signs and got me help, and, most importantly, I learnt to help myself and I made a decision to heal myself. I am eternally grateful for those people in my life. Slowly, day by day, through the setbacks and triggers that are part of the natural healing process, I rebuilt my strength, my belief in myself and my attitude. And, in fact, creating and doing the $1000 Project really helped, as it gave me a positive distraction. Today, I’m loving life more than I ever have before and I have a sense of gratitude that I would never had experienced without going to that dark place earlier.

Looking back now, I can see that I gained awareness, growth, insight and mindfulness from this dark period of my life. It gave me depth of character and incredible strength. Without a doubt I still have tough days, and negative thoughts can creep into my head when things go wrong, people hurt me or triggering moments occur, and sometimes I even fear that it may come back. But I have the awareness now to catch these dark thoughts, and catch them quickly. And then I know to do the things that I need to let those emotions pass by, whether that be having a nap, meditating, using positive self-talk, eating a healthy meal, going to the gym, or – one of my fastest ‘snap out of the headspace’ activities – listening to a motivational talk on YouTube.

Reflecting on this period of my life made me realise how important charities like the Gidget Foundation are for women who are struggling with postnatal depression. As I made my first donation to them, I felt proud. I knew that I had a real purpose and mission for the $1000 Project.

SEE GIVING AS PART OF THE BIGGER PICTURE OF YOUR LIFE

As I continued through round two of the project, I started to wonder what my next charity would be. This time, instead of thinking too much about it, I decided that I’d let the universe show me when the time was right.

As part of my first $1000 Project, I set myself a ‘Frugal February’ challenge, during which I forced myself for one month to live a simple, essentials-only existence, with any money I saved out of my personal budget going towards my next $1000 parcel. This quickly taught me how mindless I was with my cash and spending, and it brought a sense of grounding and respect back into my life.

I expected the same great lessons when doing Frugal February in round two, but this time it was very different. I became angry, frustrated and annoyed, and felt so constricted. I was fed up with denying myself anything fun!

Towards the end of Frugal February, I was invited to go to a ladies’ lunch. Being at the end of my tether from feeling like the world’s biggest tight-arse and constantly saying no and sulking, I decided to go, even though it was totally against my rules. I listened to my body, as I promised I’d do, and knew that a catch-up with my friends might help settle my frustration and give me the respite that would recharge my focus to finish off Frugal February on a stronger note. So off I went to the lunch, albeit feeling a little guilty.

It was a ridiculously hot Friday afternoon in Sydney, and we were sitting in a beautiful restaurant by the water, sipping rosé. I was enjoying myself, but I still felt a tad guilty. Then a woman who knew one of my friends walked passed our table. We invited her to come and join us for a drink, and the moment she sat down, I realised that I was supposed to meet this person and hear her story. It was meant to be, and I realised how powerful the universe is when we open up. Let’s just say the guilt evaporated!

The lady who sat down next to me was called Adayanti, and as she shared her story, our mouths were hanging open in awe. Anything that we were previously complaining about seemed so insignificant.

Adayanti’s grandparents were two orphans who met in an orphanage in Jakarta, Indonesia. After Adayanti’s father and maternal grandfather passed away within a close period of time, her mother decided to return to the orphanage in memory of her parents and take over the running of it.

This orphanage is supported solely by donations from the public. And listening to the stories Adayanti shared about her mother’s strength, determination and passion as well as the children she cared for, I immediately wanted to help her continue her incredible work, making a difference in so many precious children’s lives.

In the past, when I wanted to donate to charity, I felt somewhat restricted and limited, and at times like I wasn’t doing enough or understanding how my money was going to help exactly. But deciding that I would give the next year’s dividend income from the $1000 Project to the Pa van der Steur Orphanage felt really good, and I was excited. I was able to hear about Adayanti’s mother’s goals for the orphanage, how she wanted to help the children who were brought to her. All of the children had been through things most of us hopefully will never have to experience. Any financial help that I could give would really make a difference for their futures. It felt real to help, and now I felt even more motivated to push harder so that the donation I could hand over would be as big as possible.

After meeting this young woman, I felt at peace about going to that somewhat indulgent lunch, knowing that something really powerful and positive had come from it. I made sure that I held on to the enthusiasm and determination to make that year’s total dividend amount as big as I could.

After this turning point, I had more awareness and I felt calmer as I progressed through the project. Of course, things went wrong occasionally, as they do in all of our lives. But when they did, it simply didn’t bother me like it would have previously. I started to look for an underlying lesson in whatever happened, so that I could grow from it. Then I picked myself back up and moved on to focus on the next positive thing.

INVOLVE OTHERS IN YOUR ACTS OF CHARITY

During this period, I became more aware of my desire to give and how it was motivating me. I was still so excited about giving the year’s total dividend income to the Pa van der Steur Orphanage, but my deadline wasn’t until October, and that felt so far away. I wanted to do something sooner, but not necessarily giving money. I wanted to give in a more personal way, where I could feel more involved and more helpful.

Rocco and I had a trip booked to Bali for some much-needed quality time. There had been a lot of sacrifices in building up the portfolio and, on occasion, ‘Rocco time’ had been shortened. As painful as the guilt was, I know that when Rocco is old enough, he will understand why and be proud, particularly when he knows about the great causes the money is supporting, and maybe one day take over if he wants to.

Watching my child grow up in Sydney, I can’t help but feel incredibly lucky. We’re surrounded by beautiful beaches and parks, and we have access to amazing food and high-quality schools. But at the same time, kids seem to constantly want and ask for things. I listen to my child assume that when his toy breaks, we can simply buy another one; when he selects his muffin from our local cafe, we can get another if he doesn’t like the flavour or, heaven forbid, drops it on the floor; and that Christmas time and birthdays are just about getting lots of toys. And lots of kids live in a cashless world, where money comes out of a magical wall (AKA an ATM).

I’m doing my best to explain, patiently, to Rocco that we need to take care of our belongings and that money needs to be respected. I believe it’s our responsibility as parents to teach our children that it’s okay and safe to experience the word ‘no’ being said, and to process the feeling of not getting something that we want. And I also want to teach him to give – and to show him why we need to give. In particular, I wanted Rocco to identify with other children who have different challenges that he may never face, and see how his own powerful actions of giving can bring a smile and helping hand to another little person’s life.

So, in anticipation of our trip to Bali, we researched various charities there and ended up contacting the Jodie O’Shea Orphanage in Denpasar and asking if they would like any new toys – and, if so, what types of toys. They immediately replied and gave us a humble list.

I explained to Rocco (who was about to turn four) what an orphanage was and how it would be nice to give these special children some new toys. He didn’t quite understand what I was talking about, so we headed to our nearest big toy shop and I let Rocco pick out $1000 worth of toys and put them in the shopping trolley.

Only once did he show interest in a toy for himself; for the most part he stuck to the list and selected toys for both boys and girls and a wide range of ages. He understood that these toys being purchased were not for him but to be given to a special little girl or boy, similar in age to him. I was so proud and impressed. And I realised that I’d underestimated our ability to inspire and educate our own children about the importance of giving unconditionally.

Also, by including Rocco in the process and having toys as the donation – something that he knew how to value – I felt that he understood the meaning and act behind this so much more than if we’d been donating cash.

When we arrived in Bali, we went to the orphanage with five full boxes of toys. The kids rushed over to rip open the boxes and Rocco helped hand them out. He was a little overwhelmed but he could see immediately how much this meant to them.

GIVE CONSCIOUSLY AND MINDFULLY

I learnt an important lesson there as well, which is that if you want to help, don’t assume what people need or want. Ask them specifically what they need most, and be open to the answer. Giving toys to the Jodie O’Shea Orphanage was a special moment that I will treasure forever, and they were something that was really needed. But in talking to the managers of the orphanage when we were there, I learnt that food was one of the biggest challenges for them. With 98 children in the orphanage, nearly 300 meals were served up every day, and that didn’t include the teachers’ and carers’ meals. So part of that $1000 could have gone towards fresh food. The toys brought them a lot of joy and happiness, but I was reminded again of the importance of being mindful and conscious when giving to others.

As your financial strength, control and progress develops through the $1000 Project, I suggest that you look to include an act of giving back or helping in some form, whether it be financial or simply giving of your time. Make sure that it’s special and has meaning for you, ask what is the best way you can help, and then help in the best way that you can with no expectations of getting anything in return. That is real charity.

One thing’s for sure: when you give consciously and unconditionally, your motivation and desire to repeat the process is incredible. For me, not only was it a huge source of inspiration and motivation to keep focused and not stop, but it also made me even more conscious of what I buy, use and consume, so that next time I could be even more helpful with the $1000 Project annual donation.