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I do not sleep. I watch out the window. I think about what Doctor Troy said.

She did not recognize herself.

I know he talked about me.

I remember the girl on the television. I remember each place she went. It is like remembering the notes of a song. I cannot forget that big-ear girl, the girl with Sandy and Doctor Beck. I look at my reflection in the mirror. There is a thin face, brown skin, short hair.

Doctor Troy said, She did not recognize herself. He must be wrong. I was not in the television. I could not be in that little life behind the glass and this big life all at the same time. Unless the life behind the glass is a remembering. Can they reach inside me and take a remembering? When I first came here, Doctor Beck put many wires on my head and told me to sleep. Did she take my rememberings then? I am so confused. The girl behind the glass, the girl with long hair, the place where she stood made me think of the rocks where I drank the freshwater, the cay where I ate from the tide pools.

I think about the girl, naked. Her hair so long and black. Her skin gray and white with streaks of salt. And her little circle scars.

I look in the mirror again. There are the big ears, the big, big ears. There are the little scars.

Doctor Troy said, She did not recognize herself.

The girl was me! Mila.

I am afraid. I saw the girl with no clothes. I thought, This is a bad girl. She has no clothes. I saw her long wild hair. I thought, This girl is ugly with her long wild hair. I saw the girl with her eyes showing white. I thought, This girl has fear. I thought, I am happy not to be that girl.

But I am that girl.

That is what Doctor Troy meant.

The remembering of my capture is taken out of my head and put behind the glass of the television. If they have that, do they have all my other rememberings too? But how could they take my rememberings when I still have them? My head feels like it is caught in the claw of a crab.

I need to know. I need someone to help me understand. Shay cannot help.

Who can help me?