| |
*Six Months Later*
Sawyer’s boots squeaked with each step as he paced around his parents’ living room. He’d tuned the sound out, but everyone else in the room was glaring at him after each pass. Sam groaned and sat up from where he lay sprawled on their parent’s couch.
“Sawyer, I swear to God, if you don’t sit down, I am going to call Chuck and tell her to call the whole thing off.”
“Suck it,” Sawyer growled, shoving both hands through his hair. “I need another beer. What is taking them so long?”
“They are only five minutes late.” Alice cornered him by the window and used her hands to flatten the hair he’d messed up. “Sit down and have a drink with your brother.”
“What if something happened? What if Carmen has come to her senses and is packing right now? What if she’s decided she can’t live here, and—”
“Oh my God, get a grip!” Sam sprung over the arm of the couch and tackled Sawyer around the shoulders. Holding him in a half choke, half hug, he hauled Sawyer backward into the kitchen. “You are going to sit here by Dad. You are going to drink a beer, and you are going to calm the fuck down.”
Sawyer opened his mouth, closed it, balled his fists, then sat in the chair his brother pointed at. “I can’t see out the window from here,” he grumbled. Dan pushed a beer into his hand and lowered himself onto the stool beside Sawyer.
“Chuck said she would text when they are close.”
“I know, but—”
“No!” Sam stepped in front of him and held a palm up. “No more. Carmen loves you for reasons I can’t figure out, and she will be over the moon. But, if you put yourself into a panic attack and end up hyperventilating and passing out, that will make this evening memorable in all new ways. Ways you don’t want.”
“Sam’s right, honey. You need to calm down. I will keep an eye on the window in case Chuck forgets to text.” Alice pressed a cool palm against his cheek. Then her eyes welled, and she spun away and went into the living room.
Sawyer drained half the beer in one pull and then turned, setting it on the counter behind him. Drawing a deep breath through his nose, he rested his forehead against his fingertips. Dan’s big hand settled on his shoulder.
“I’m proud of you,” he said, his deep voice low. “And I can’t wait to call that girl my daughter.”
Sawyer couldn’t speak for a moment. Emotion tightened like a fist around his throat and his eyes blurred. Keeping his head down, he cleared his throat. The tearing sound echoed around the quiet kitchen. “Thanks, Pops,” he said.
Alice let out an excited squeal from the living room, then Sam skidded into the room, his face flushed. “They’re here!” he hissed.
Sawyer jumped up, nearly knocking over his stool. Dan caught it with one hand while taking a sip of his beer with the other. Sawyer wanted to appreciate the sheer coolness of the move, but his heart pounded so hard he worried he might puke.
“Oh my God.” He shook his hands at his side, taking a shaky breath. Catching Sam’s eye, he mouthed “action.” Then he spun to the cabinet above the sink and grabbed a pink bottle from inside. Across the room, Sam let out a bark of laughter.
“Now you’re going to taste like Pepto,” he chuckled.
“Don’t care.” Sawyer took another pull and then capped the bottle. “My stomach might end this before it begins if I don’t do something.”
The front door slammed. He heard Carmen laugh and say something to Alice and hoped his mom didn’t give anything away by bursting into tears or anything. He hoped he didn’t burst into tears.
“Come on, baby brother,” Sam said, his grin stretching his face to ridiculous proportions. “Showtime.”
Sawyer stepped into the living room. Carmen and Chuck had kicked off their shoes, and Alice had already presented them both with a glass of wine. Carmen was looking between Alice and Chuck with her brows furrowed. When Sawyer cleared his throat, she looked up at him. The smile that bloomed across her face when their eyes met nearly floored him.
“Hello, my love,” she said, stretching up to her tiptoes to press her lips to his. “Did you and Sam have fun today?”
That was the ruse, a girls’ day for her and Charlotte at the spa, fishing for him and Sam. Only, they hadn’t gone fishing. They had spent the day in the Stevensons’ backyard, turning it into a wonderland lit with twinkle lights and decorated with flowers.
“We did,” he said, slipping an arm around her waist to pull her tighter against him. She smelled of coconuts and sugar. He dipped his head to hers again, savouring her mouth. How was it possible to miss her when it had only been this morning when he last saw her?
Carmen pulled her head back, wrinkling her nose up at him. “What do you taste like right now?”
Damn it, Sam had been right.
Carmen licked her lips and cocked her head. “Pepto Bismol?” she asked.
“Uhh.” Sawyer rubbed a hand across the back of his neck. “Yeah.”
“Are you all right?”
“To many beers on the lake.” He waved her concerns away with a hand, then used it to seize hers. “Come on, we’re going to eat outside.”
Carmen allowed him to pull her through the kitchen. His parents, brother, and Chuck had all clearly been listening at the door. They scattered and grabbed various things when he and Carmen entered in an attempt to look busy. If he wasn’t so nervous, Sawyer would have laughed. Carmen tugged at her hand, trying to move to where Alice stood at the sink. “Alice, can I help with anything?”
“No, no.” Alice waved a hand at them, refusing to turn around, her voice suspiciously high. “Go outside and enjoy your wine.”
Sawyer pulled her through the room to the open patio doors. “Wait,” he said, stopping her just before she stepped outside. She paused, turning to look at him.
“I love you,” he said. At the sink, Alice made a choked sound.
Carmen frowned. “I love you—” She stopped talking when Sawyer raised a hand and pressed it over her eyes. “What are you doing?”
Using his free hand to turn her, Sawyer guided her through the door, across the patio, and down to the lawn. Carmen started to laugh. “Sawyer, what the heck are you up to?”
Sawyer filled his lungs to capacity, then let it out in a long, slow breath that whooshed past his lips and stirred the hair at the back of Carmen’s head. He dropped his hand. Carmen was silent for a moment, then she did a slow circle, her eyes growing wide. One slim hand rose and hovered near her mouth. She raised her eyes to his. “Did you do this?”
He nodded. “Yeah.” There was a beep from the outdoor speaker, and then the notes of “Time of My Life” danced around them.
Carmen’s eyes widened. “Sawyer?” Her voice came out a whisper.
Sawyer grabbed her hand; her fingers trembled in his. Or maybe it was him that shook. He smiled at her and then dropped to one knee. Carmen pressed her free hand over her mouth, but a shuddery sound still escaped.
“Carm, I was a mess when you left. When you came to Willow Brook, it was like someone had switched on a light in my soul. I never want to be without that light again. Carmen Maclean, will you marry me?” His voice broke on the words, tears blurring the sight of her. He went to squeeze his eyes shut, to clear them, but found he wasn’t willing to take his eyes off her, even for a second.
“Oh, Sawyer.” She tried to pull him to his feet, then changed her mind and dropped to her knees in front of him, taking his face in her hands. “I love you. I never want to be away from you again.” She grinned, and the motion set the tears hovering on her lids free. They rolled over her cheeks and dripped onto their joined hands. “I want to be your light.”
Sawyer raised their joined hands to his lips, kissing her fingers. “Carmen, damn it, is that a yes?”
Carmen tipped her head back, a laugh escaping her. “Yes, you wonderful, beautiful goofball. I will marry you.”
With a choked laugh of his own, Sawyer grabbed her in a hug, pulling her close and showering kisses across her cheeks.
“We’re coming out!” Chuck’s voice rang across the yard. There was a pounding of feet across the patio, and then they were engulfed in arms—a dog pile of love. Chuck and Alice were unabashedly sobbing, and it set Carmen off.
“Let me see it! Come on!” Chuck said, rubbing her fingers under her eyes. Sam and Dan, more stoic in their excitement, stood off to the side. Sawyer noticed they seemed to be blinking a lot and avoiding each other’s eyes.
Carmen’s face blazed. “See what?” she asked.
Sawyer’s stomach dropped like a rock. His hand flew to his back pocket. To the square bulge straining the denim. “Holy shit.”
Sam’s head jerked up. “You didn’t?”
They were all looking at him now. Blood rushed up his neck to flood his face. He pushed his fingers into his pocket and pulled out the box. “I forgot to give her the ring.”
Sam thumped the heel of his hand against his forehead. Dan groaned. Chuck stared at him, her mouth agape. Carmen, God, how he loved her, had her arms crossed over her stomach, laughing so hard more tears leaked over her cheeks.
“Oh my God!” Alice wailed, covering her face with both hands. “She was going to marry you even though you didn’t have a ring!”
“Sawyer!” Chuck backhanded him across the chest. “Get at it!”
Nodding, he pulled open the box and held it up to Carmen. She hiccupped, trying to catch her breath. Pulling up her sweater, she used the hem to mop her face.
“Oh, it’s beautiful,” she breathed. The square-cut diamond sat in a petite setting, tiny flower details all around the band. “Put it on,” she whispered, holding her hand out to him.
Sawyer pulled the ring from the box and slipped it over her finger. Charlotte had made sure Carmen had gotten a manicure today, and the ring shone along with the opalescent polish on her nails.
“I love it,” she said, tearing her eyes from the ring and up to meet his.
“And I love you, fiancé.” The word made her grin.
Sawyer thought his heart might explode. He pulled her in and seized her mouth, slipping his tongue past her lips. Her shuddering breath washed over him, and he stole that, too, deepening the kiss further. He let his hands travel lower, cupping her ass and closing the last inch between them.
Behind them, Dan cleared his throat. Carmen pulled her mouth away, her eyes wide. She sunk her teeth into her bottom lip and stared at him. A bolt of heat shot through him at the look she cast him. Sawyer wanted nothing more than to throw her over his shoulder, take her upstairs to his old room, and make her cry his name for the rest of the night. No, even better, he would throw her in his truck, and they would go back to his apartment.
He turned and saw the group behind them, watching with happy grins on their collective faces. Even Dan was beaming. Shit, they couldn’t leave. Not yet.
Bending, he brushed a kiss over Carmen’s cheek. “I am going to do such dirty things to you later, fiancée,” he growled. She looked up at him, love blazing in her eyes.
“I’ll be looking forward to it,” she said.
Alice called them all over to the table to eat, and the night descended into merriment. Wine was passed around, and then around again. Alice cried three more times and even Dan grew misty-eyed when he stood up and gave a congratulatory speech. Sawyer caught Carmen staring at the reflection of the twinkle lights in her ring four times, and Sam had to leave the room after Chuck took her turn standing and offering them some surprisingly touching words of her own. His throat grew tight as he looked around the table. The only people missing were Sasha and her family. At his side Charlotte elbowed him gently.
“I can’t believe I finally found a great roommate and you’re stealing her,” she said.
Sawyer grinned at her. “Sorry, Chuckers.”
“Oh, do not. Chuck is bad enough, thanks.” She stared at him for a moment, then a soft smile touched her lips, bringing out a hint of her dimples. “I’m so happy for you, Saw-horse.”
“I’m happy for me, too.”
She held her glass up and Sawyer clinked his rim against it.
****
CARMEN FOUND SAWYER standing in front of the little cement cross nestled in the roses. Outside the glow of the twinkle lights, the yard was cast in deep shadow and brushed with a floral-scented breeze.
He heard her soft step on the path behind him but didn’t turn. Her arms slipped around him from behind, and she laid her head between his shoulder blades, holding him silently. They stood that way for a long moment before Sawyer released a sigh.
“It scares the hell out of me, thinking about you having a baby,” he admitted. It was easier to say with her hugging him that way when he couldn’t see her face. “Us having a family, I want that more than anything, but what if—”
“No what-ifs,” she interrupted him, turning his shoulders so he faced her. Sawyer hung his head, not quite able to meet her eye. “None,” she said. “We could what-if ourselves to death if we wished.” She cupped a cool hand to his cheek and forced him to look at her. “All we can do is hope. Hope is magic. And if—when bad things happen, because they do, Sawyer—there’s always going to be grief in our lives. It’s not escapable; we just have to be strong enough to weather it together. You and me.”
He nodded. His five o’clock shadow rasped against her palm. “Okay,” he said, not trusting his voice to more words.
Carmen stared up at him for a moment. “You never have to be ashamed or worried about looking tough for me. If you need to be sad, then be sad. I know you had a life before me, and it isn’t something you should feel you have to hide away. I’m here and I love you.”
This time he knew he couldn’t speak. The storm of emotions had him by the throat. So, Sawyer lowered his head and kissed her. Happiness had found him in Carmen, and he would never let it go, again.