Grabill
Doretta’s heart constricted as she read her dear friend’s recent letter. It was a shock to learn that Vic had begun drinking beer after his little brother died. Eleanor said that her husband had stopped drinking for a while but then started again after learning that he was going to become a father. Eleanor also stated that she couldn’t take Vic at his word anymore because he’d been lying to her about his drinking habit and perhaps other things as well.
Clearly desperate to share her burden, Eleanor had reached out to Doretta, asking for prayer and pleading with her not to tell anyone about Vic’s problem and how it had been affecting their marriage in such a negative way.
Poor, sweet Eleanor. You’re my best friend and such a good person. It’s hard to imagine that you are having to go through this and being forced to deal with such a stressful situation. Doretta’s thoughts went in several directions as she tried to analyze things and seek some sort of resolution. Her mind skipped ahead to some of the possible consequences of Vic’s behavior. Would things get so bad that Eleanor might consider leaving him—maybe not indefinitely, but until he sought help?
Using the tips of her fingers, Doretta made little circles across her forehead as she reflected further. Has Eleanor tried to persuade Vic to get help? There was no mention of that in her letter. It is, however, something my friend should consider. Would I be out of place to suggest to Eleanor that she should try to get her husband some help? There are places like Alcoholics Anonymous and many clinics that treat various addictions. There are also Christian counseling services, and of course, talking with their church leaders could help.
Doretta lowered her hands into her lap. If only we lived closer and I could be there for her. She needs a close friend for comfort now more than ever. I wish I could talk to my mamm about this, but Eleanor asked me not to tell anyone, and I won’t break her trust.
She got up from the foot of her bed, where she’d been sitting to read Eleanor’s letter, and took a seat in the chair in front of her desk. In addition to praying earnestly for her friend’s situation, the very least Doretta could do was to write Eleanor a letter, offering some suggestions for where Vic might find help for his addiction. Of course, he’d have to be willing to talk about his problems, and since seeking professional help was something he might not agree to, Doretta would let her friend know that she would definitely be praying about the situation.
Paradise
Eleanor fought queasiness as she forced herself to get out the ingredients for some baking. Lying around on the couch or in bed while feeling sorry for herself didn’t ease the nausea she felt or help her forget about the confrontation she’d had with Vic when he’d come home from work last night. Vic had not only arrived two hours later than usual, but he’d been drinking again. This was getting old, and her patience was about to wear out. Eleanor’s emotions were erratic and often ran high with the hormones of pregnancy. Sometimes she would find herself crying easily over the least little thing. But she had a right to her strong feelings regarding her husband’s alcohol addiction. He hadn’t tried to hide it from her this time, the way he had a few weeks ago when he’d slept on the couch. From what Eleanor could tell, Vic didn’t seem to care how much his actions hurt her. He’d made it quite plain last night that she needed to stop nagging him about it. Eleanor could still see her husband’s flared nostrils and the tightness around his eyes. She replayed in her mind the way Vic had raised his voice at her, saying he could do whatever he wanted and she was not his boss. It seemed almost every day Vic said or did something to hurt Eleanor’s feelings, and he never bothered to apologize.
“Such a contrast from the husband I spent two weeks with in Florida.” Eleanor swallowed against the bile rising in her throat as she forced herself to take out a glass baking dish that she would use to make an applesauce cake. If Vic would only listen to reason and realize that he needed help now, before his drinking problem became worse.
Eleanor remembered an English man who’d lived in the community where she’d grown up. He had dealt with a serious alcohol dependency. Sadly, he had become known as the town drunk. The fellow had gotten so bad that he’d begun abusing his wife and children and finally ended up in jail when someone reported his actions.
Could things go that far with Vic? Eleanor asked herself. I surely don’t want anyone to think of my husband as the town drunk. Before Eddie died, Vic was always a gentle, kindhearted man, but I’ve witnessed how the influence of alcohol can change a person, and if he doesn’t get control of his drinking habits soon, it will change him too.
Eleanor’s gaze came to rest on the stenciled lettering she’d put on one kitchen wall some time ago. It was a verse from the Bible that she’d read many times, Joshua 24:15: “BUT AS FOR ME AND MY HOUSE, WE WILL SERVE THE LORD.” She had put it there before Vic had started drinking, believing that it would be a reminder for both of them to always put God first and seek to serve Him in all ways. Eleanor wondered if her husband noticed the stenciling anymore. If he did, he never commented on it, and worse, Vic was not doing anything that would indicate that he wanted to serve the Lord. Had he lost his faith in God altogether after the death of his brother?
Tears sprang to her eyes, and she whisked them away with the back of her hand. Crying would not solve the problem, and besides, she had already shed way too many tears.
Eleanor placed one hand against her abdomen and held it there for several seconds. Feeling so stressed is not good for me or the precious infant growing within my belly. If Vic doesn’t straighten out soon, I may have to go away for a while—at least until he wakes up to the fact that he has a problem and is willing to get some help.
Eleanor leaned over the kitchen sink as a wave of nausea came so fast she felt sure that she would lose her breakfast. Despite the chill outside, she opened the window and took in a few deep breaths, hoping it would help calm her down and ease the nausea. Her thinking had become muddled due to all the stress she’d been under since learning she was pregnant, and something needed to change. Between the problems she faced with Vic and the hours she felt sick to her stomach every day, Eleanor was barely able to function. Yet she kept forcing herself to do things like cooking, baking, laundry, and other household chores. They all needed to be done, and she was the only person here to do them.
A blast of cold made a hasty entrance into the room, and she quickly shut the window. When Eleanor reached into the cupboard for a sack of flour, a knock sounded on the front door. Placing the sack on the counter and wiping away the tears beneath her eyes, she went to see who it was.
Susie smiled when Eleanor opened the door, but seeing the grave expression on her daughter-in-law’s face caused the woman’s smile to fade.
“Are you feeling grank today?” she asked upon entering the house with a bag in her grasp, along with a plastic container.
Eleanor moved her head slowly up and down. “I felt quite ill a few moments ago, and nearly vomited in the kitchen sink.”
“Oh my. I’m so sorry.” Susie gave Eleanor a hug. “I’ve been worried about you, so I came by to find out how you’re doing and see if there is anything I can do to help. Also, I’ve brought a couple of different teas. One is ginger and the other is peppermint. You can try them both, and hopefully at least one of them might curb your nausea.” Susie set the container and bag down on the narrow wooden table inside the entryway. “There are a couple dozen ginger cookies in here that might be good later too.” She tapped the top of the lid.
“I appreciate the cookies as well as the teas, and if you have the time and feel so inclined, I wouldn’t mind your help with some baking.”
“No problem. I’d be happy to help with whatever you need.” Susie removed her outer garments and hung them on the coat tree in the hall, then picked up the items she’d brought and followed Eleanor to the kitchen. When they entered the room, she set the cookies and tea bags on the counter and asked what kind of baking Eleanor had in mind.
“Before you got here, I was getting ready to make an applesauce cake. It’s one of the few things that actually appeals to me.”
“I understand completely. When I was expecting Victor, I sometimes had to force myself to eat, because with the frequent bouts of nausea, my appetite often disappeared.”
“That’s how it is for me most days.” Eleanor stood against the wall, her arms hanging loosely at her sides. “I don’t have much energy either.”
“Pregnancy does make a woman feel tired. That’s why it’s important for you to get as much rest as possible.” Susie studied her daughter-in-law’s face. The dark shadows beneath Eleanor’s eyes were an indication that she either wasn’t sleeping enough hours at night or the sleep she did get wasn’t good quality. Susie remembered how during each of her pregnancies, she’d sometimes suffered with heartburn or simply couldn’t find a comfortable position while trying to sleep. It had been a challenge to get enough rest in order to keep doing her chores every day. Thankfully, she’d had her mother’s help during the first three pregnancies, and since her daughters had been older by the time she gave birth to Stephen and again when Eddie came along, Kate and Clara had chipped in and helped out.
Susie could tell that she’d made the right choice coming here today to check on her daughter-in-law. I should make myself more accessible to Eleanor’s needs. In addition to helping with chores, I can empathize more with how Eleanor feels physically and offer a mother’s touch.
“If you’re tired and not feeling well, why don’t you go lie down while I make the cake?” Susie offered.
“It would be kind of nice to lie down for a bit,” Eleanor responded, “but I wouldn’t feel right about doing that while you do my work in the kitchen.”
Susie stepped closer to Eleanor and placed both hands on her slim shoulders. “I don’t mind at all. In fact, I would count it a privilege to be able to do the baking for you.”
Eleanor’s eyes seemed to brighten a bit, and she smiled. “Danki for your kindness. I appreciate you coming by and offering to help, more than you know.”
“I’m happy to do it. I’m also available to come back later this week if you need me.”
“Are you sure that wouldn’t be an imposition?”
“Not at all. Maybe you could figure out what you’d need to have done around here—like the laundry or some cleaning. Have you been up to going out shopping?”
“On some days, when I’ve felt up to it, I have been able to do a few errands, but other times the nausea has persisted, which has kept me close to home. And as far as getting chores done, that can be hit or miss, depending on how much energy I have.”
“I can help you with your grocery shopping or other errands.” Susie glanced at the door. “Have you gotten your mail today?”
Eleanor heaved a sigh. “No, I haven’t been out to the box yet.”
“Don’t give it another thought. I’ll go out right now and get it for you before I start the baking.”
“Thank you. Guess I’ll go lie down on the couch and rest awhile. If I fall asleep, please wake me.”
Susie shook her head. “I’ll do no such thing. If you doze off, I will not disturb you.”
“Okay.” When Eleanor brought a shaky hand up to her forehead, tears pooled in her eyes.
“Is everything all right? I mean, other than you being tired and nauseated?” Susie couldn’t help feeling concern.
A few seconds passed, and Eleanor said in a near whisper, “Things are a bit stressful for me and Vic right now. I’m hoping everything will be better soon.” Before Susie could comment, Eleanor turned and shuffled out of the kitchen.
Susie pursed her lips. I am almost sure now that there is some kind of a problem going on between my son and his fraa. I should have spoken to Victor about it like I’d planned to do, but I have yet to get that chance. Poor Eleanor. The last thing a woman in a family way needs is a struggle in her marriage. The next time I see Victor and no one’s around, I am going to speak to him about this important matter.
Lancaster
“How are things going with the old ball and chain?” Tom looked at Vic over the rim of his coffee mug as he lifted it to his lips.
Vic gave his left ear a tug. “What?”
“I said …”
Vic held up his hand. “I know what you said. What I don’t know is what you meant by that.”
“Ball and chain. You’ve heard the expression before, right?”
“I’m aware of what a ball and chain is, but I don’t have one.”
“Sure you do.” Tom set the mug down and picked up his sandwich. “In this instance, ball and chain refers to your wife.”
“Huh?”
“She ties you down, right?”
“I–I’m not sure what you’re getting at.” Vic blew out his cheeks and then released the air quickly. “Are you trying to make me feel stupid by asking questions you think I don’t understand?”
“Not at all.” Tom ate the piece of sandwich he’d put in his mouth and washed it down with more coffee. “When I picked you up this morning, I mentioned going out for a few drinks after work and asked if you’d like to go with me.”
Vic bobbed his head. “And I said, not this time. Eleanor and I had an argument last night, and I don’t want to make things any worse by getting home late this evening with alcohol on my breath.”
Tom lifted one hand with his palm up. “Ball and chain.”
“Stop saying that. My wife is not a ball and chain. She’s expecting our first baby and—”
“So now you’ve lost all your freedom. Next thing you know, she’ll have you talked into going off to some stupid AA meetings.” Spots of color erupted on Tom’s cheeks. “That’s what my wife tried to do with me.”
“AA?”
“Yeah—you know—Alcoholics Anonymous, where everyone in attendance sits around in a circle and admits that they’re an alcoholic.” Tom scrunched up his nose as though some foul odor had permeated the booth where they sat inside the restaurant they’d gone to for lunch. “And then the ones in charge try to make you give up drinking,” he added with a scowl.
Vic opened his mouth to say something, but, thinking better of it, he bit the inside of his cheek. He was sure that Eleanor would never expect him to attend an AA meeting. A place like that was for alcoholics, not someone like him who drank once in a while to relax and cope with the stresses of life. Vic figured all he needed to do to get back in Eleanor’s good graces was promise to quit drinking and pay a little more attention to her. Starting tonight, that’s exactly what he would do.