THE brisk, instant routine of St Judd’s was something Victoria almost welcomed, so that she could tell herself as frequently as possible that it was her life, the one she had chosen even though her parents had wanted her to stay at home, busying herself with voluntary work of some sort; indulging her talent for sketching while she waited for, and in due course married, some suitable man. She alone of their four daughters had rebelled against this pleasant tameness even while she suffered acute homesickness each time she returned to work. That she was more fortunate than many of her friends in hospital she freely admitted, for she didn’t need to depend upon her salary; her father was generous so that she could make the long journey to Guernsey whenever she could manage her holiday. All the same she prized her independence, although she knew in her heart that while nursing satisfied her need to do something with her life, she would leave it at a moment’s notice if she met a man she could love.
She went on duty the morning after her return, to find a ward whose inmates had changed very little during her week’s absence. Sister Crow welcomed her back with the mixture of fussy grumbling and gossip to which Victoria had become accustomed. The staff nurse who had replaced Victoria had been most unsatisfactory—she had overslept; she had insisted on having a free evening on the very day Sister Crow hadn’t wanted her to; she was, said Sister Crow crossly, far too modern.
Victoria, pouring out their morning coffee in Sister’s office, said gently: ‘Staff Nurse Morgan’s sweet with the patients, Sister, and so kind.’
Sister Crow bridled. ‘That’s as may be, Staff Nurse Parsons, but I for one am unable to understand the half of what she says—she is not good Ward Sister material.’
Victoria suppressed a strong desire to observe that perhaps Morgan didn’t want to be a Ward Sister anyway; she was pretty and gay, and Victoria happened to know that her life was both full and lively, which probably accounted for her kindness and understanding of the patients under her care. But to say that to the Old Crow was merely to annoy her further and would do no one any good at all. She contented herself by saying:
‘The patients liked her, Sister.’
Sister Crow stirred her coffee and remarked snappishly: ‘They like you too, Staff Nurse, and you are a far better nurse. Much as I regret retiring from this ward I am at least satisfied that you, if given the opportunity, will carry on in a way worthy of the training I have given you.’
To which highminded speech Victoria could think of nothing to say, although the thought, completely unbidden, that perhaps she didn’t want to be a Ward Sister after all did cross her mind, to be rejected as there was a knock on the door and Johnny Dawes, the medical houseman, came in followed by a tallish young man, good-looking and fair.
Johnny said politely: ‘Good morning, Sister Crow, here’s Doctor Blake, you met yesterday, didn’t you?’ He looked at Victoria. ‘But I don’t think that Staff and he have met yet?’ He had half turned his back on the Old Crow as he spoke and gave Victoria a wink, for when that lady wasn’t about he was apt to treat her staff nurse like one of his sisters—an attitude which Victoria found quite natural, but now, as Sister Crow was present, she replied formally: ‘Good morning, Doctor Dawes. No, we haven’t met.’
‘The new RMO,’ said Johnny, ‘Doctor Jeremy Blake— Staff Nurse Parsons.’
She offered a hand and said, How do you do? and gave the new member of the staff a frank, friendly look. He seemed at first glance rather nice and very good-looking, although his mouth was a little too full for her taste and his eyes too pale a blue. Probably, she thought goodhumouredly, he was weighing her up too and finding her not quite to his taste either. She got up and fetched two more cups; Sister Crow poured coffee and settled down to a ten-minute lecture on how to run a ward and, what was more important, how the members of the medical staff should behave on it. Victoria and Johnny had heard it all a great many times before, but Doctor Blake hadn’t; he listened with polite attention and drank his coffee and when she paused for breath, suggested that a ward round might be a good idea. He looked at Victoria as he spoke and added: ‘If you’re busy, Sister, I’m sure Staff Nurse…’
‘Staff Nurse has a great deal to do,’ interrupted Sister Crow. ‘I shall go with you myself, and you,’ she finished, addressing Johnny, ‘may come with me.’
That left Victoria to collect the coffee cups on to the tray, ready for Dora the ward maid, and then go along to the treatment room to make sure that the various injections had been drawn up correctly and then supervise their giving, before disappearing into the linen cupboard to check the clean linen, a task she loathed and considered a fearful waste of time. She preferred to be with the patients, but Sister Crow considered that the ward staff nurse should do all the duller administrative jobs. ‘And that’s something I’ll change,’ Victoria promised herself crossly as she counted sheets. But some of the crossness, although she wouldn’t admit it, was disappointment at not doing a round with the new doctor, even though, upon reflection, she wasn’t quite sure if she was going to like him.
She had a split duty that afternoon because the Old Crow wanted an evening. She hated splits; there was no time to do more than rush out for any necessary shopping, or if the weather was bad, sit for an hour or so in the sitting room, reading or writing letters. Splits weren’t actually allowed, but they were sometimes inevitable and she seemed to collect more than her fair share—another thing she would put right when she had a ward of her own. She sat in front of the electric fire, writing home; she told them all about the new doctor, and all the while she was writing another image, quite a different one from that of Doctor Blake, kept dancing before her eyes. It was a relief when two of her friends came to join her, full of questions as to what she thought of the new RMO and what she had done on her holiday, a topic which naturally enough led to the more interesting one of clothes. They were all deep in this vital conversation when Victoria looked at her watch and exclaimed:
‘Lord, look at the time—I’m on in half an hour! Come up to my room and I’ll make some tea—I brought a cake back with me.’
The three of them repaired up the bare, clean staircase to the floor above where her room was, and being healthy and young and perpetually hungry, they demolished the cake between them.
Doctor Blake came again that evening as Victoria was sitting in the office writing up the Kardex. She looked up with faint surprise and some impatience as he came in, because she had got a little behind with her work and she wouldn’t be ready for the night staff unless she kept at it. He must have seen the look, though, for he said reassuringly:
‘Don’t stop, I only came to read up some notes—it’s the ward round tomorrow, isn’t it, and I want to be quite sure of things.’
Victoria made a small sympathetic sound. ‘Of course—behind you on the shelf, they’re in alphabetical order,’ and bent her bright head over her writing. She had turned over perhaps three cards when she became aware that he was staring at her. She finished writing ‘Paracetamol’ because it was a word she had to concentrate upon to get the spelling right and looked up.
‘What’s the matter?’ she asked, ‘Do you want something, or is my cap crooked?’
He smiled, his eyes like colourless glass. ‘I can’t help staring,’ he said, ‘you’re so utterly lovely.’
She had been called lovely before by various young men; usually she accepted the compliment gracefully and without conceit, for it would have been foolish to pretend she wasn’t pretty when she so obviously was. She had learnt at an early age to take her good looks as a matter of course—nice to have, but not vital to her happiness. But now for some reason she felt embarrassed and annoyed as well. He was almost a stranger and she hadn’t liked the way he had said it; as though he had expected her to be pleased and flattered at his admiration. She said with a composure which quite hid her distaste:
‘Thank you. Perhaps you would like to take the notes away with you? I have quite a lot of work to do still, and I daresay you have too.’
The annoyance on his face was so fleeting that she wasn’t sure if she had imagined it. It was replaced at once by a smile. ‘I’ve annoyed you, I’m sorry.’ He got up and put the notes away. ‘I’ll come back later if I may.’ His smile became apologetic. ‘Don’t hold it against me, will you?’
Victoria smiled too. Perhaps she had been too hasty in her judgement of him. ‘No, of course not. Goodnight.’
Sir Keith Plummer’s bi-weekly ward rounds were always a sore trial to Victoria, and she knew, the moment she set foot on the ward the next morning, that that day’s was to prove no exception to the rule. Not only had one of the diabetics thrown away a valuable specimen and been unable to produce another in the short time left to him before the great man appeared, but Mr Bates, that most docile of patients, had decided to feel sick, so that instead of lying neatly in his bed he was sitting up apprehensively over a basin, and to add to all these trials two sets of notes had disappeared into thin air. Victoria had sent two of the nurses to look for them and dared them to return without these vital papers. ‘Try Physio,’ she whispered urgently so that Sister Crow shouldn’t hear, ‘and OPD; the Appointments Office, X-ray, anywhere—and for mercy’s sake, be quick!’
They sidled in, a few yards ahead of Sir Keith and his retinue, and behind Sister Crow’s back, shook their heads and rolled their eyes heavenwards, then melted away into the sluice as the ward doors opened and Sir Keith walked in. Victoria, from her station by bed number one, watched a routine which she knew by heart. Sir Keith stopped short just inside the doors and Sister Crow, who had been lurking in wait for him, advanced to his side so that they could exchange civil greetings before forming the procession which would presently wend its way up one side of the ward and down the other. It was a pity, thought Victoria, that the Old Crow had been trained so long ago that she regarded all consultants as gods and had made no move to change her views and treat them like anyone else. Victoria watched her standing with her head reverently bowed, listening to Sir Keith’s pleasant voice rambling on, but the head came up with a jerk as the wretched student nurse Black, whose shoes squeaked, came out of the sluice, to retreat immediately under Sister Crow’s threatening gaze. The same gaze hovered over Mr Payne, who had bronchitis, and Mr Church, who had asthma, daring either of them to allow a cough to disturb the utter quiet of the ward, and both gentlemen, anxious to please, lay rigid, their slowly empurpling faces bearing testimony to this fact. When at last human nature could stand no more, they coughed in such good earnest that Victoria was forced to leave her position with the exalted group around the consultant and fly to their aid. She had only just succeeded in quieting them both when there was a fresh disturbance, this time at the ward doors, and obedient to the indignant jerk of Sister Crow’s head, Victoria sped silently down the ward. Some poor soul who had mistaken the visiting hours, she supposed, and saw at once how wrong she was. He looked different, of course, for he had exchanged his guernsey for a suit of clerical grey; her eyes took in its well-cut elegance and the exquisiteness of his tie as he advanced, with no sign of unease, to meet her.
She would have liked to have said hullo, but bearing in mind the Old Crow’s dislike of any sound at all during the round she merely raised a cautionary finger to her lips and then pointed to the doors—a gesture to which he appeared to take exception, for he said without any effort at all to lower his voice: ‘My dear girl, don’t you try and send me away. I’ve had the devil’s own job getting here in the first place.’
Victoria just stopped herself from wringing her hands. ‘It’s the round,’ she hissed. ‘Please wait outside, there’s a chair on the landing.’
‘Do I look as though I need to sit down?’ he enquired with interest.
She conquered a strong desire to giggle, shook her head and said coldly: ‘I must ask you to wait.’
He beamed at her. ‘But I will, dear girl, I’ll wait as long as you like.’ He went on; ‘You know, I liked you better with your hair down your back, even if you did look a bit of a fright.’ She was still struggling to think of a dignified but quelling reply to this piece of impertinence when Sir Keith’s voice, smooth and resonant, floated down the ward.
‘There you are, dear fellow. Come and join us—I was beginning to think that you had found it impossible to come after all.’
He bent to say something to Sister Crow and the ‘dear fellow’, with a friendly pat on Victoria’s outraged shoulder, advanced to the group of people by number six bed, and she, because it was expected of her, followed him, to take up her position just behind Sister, so that when that lady wanted notes or a tape measure or a tendon hammer to hand to Sir Keith, Victoria was there to supply them. Sir Keith put out a hand and said: ‘Alexander, this is delightful, it seems a long time—Sister Crow, let me introduce Doctor van Schuylen, on a visit to this country. He’s by way of being a specialist in chests.’ He looked round the circle of faces. ‘My RMO,’ he went on, ‘Doctor Blake, and my houseman, Doctor Dawes.’ His gaze passed over the physiotherapist, his secretary and Victoria and rested on his patient, the hapless Mr Bates, his basin removed pro tem and looking very uneasy without it.
Victoria, handing X-rays, Path Lab forms and a pin to tickle the soles of Mr Bates’ feet to see if he reacted in the proper manner, kept a wary eye on him; Sir Keith had most luckily finished with him and was about to move on to the next bed when Mr Bates went a little paler than he already was, so that she dropped her burden of forms and notes and made a beeline for the basin, but Doctor van Schuylen was ahead of her; he had it nicely in position under Mr Bates’ pallid chin even as she reached him; he did it with a calm and matter-of-fact air which took no account of Sister Crow’s horrified indrawn breath, waiting impassively until Nurse Black squeaked out of the sluice and took over, and only then did he relinquish the basin, giving that damsel—a small, plain girl known inevitably among her colleagues as Beauty—a smile of such charm that she smiled widely back at him.
He rejoined Sir Keith without a word, to be drawn instantly into a discussion on bronchiectiasis. Victoria listened to his deep, quiet voice, comparing it with Doctor Blake’s. That gentleman, intent no doubt on impressing his chief, was holding forth at some length, addressing most of his observations to the Dutchman, in a manner which Victoria considered unnecessarily patronising, although their recipient apparently did not, for he lolled against the end of the bed with his hands in his pockets and his eyes fixed steadfastly upon Doctor Blake’s face. It was only when that gentleman paused for breath that Sir Keith declared in a dry, gentle voice:
‘My dear Blake, all that you have said is most admirable, but I must point out to you that you are taking coals to Newcastle, for our good friend here happens to be the author of the various papers you have been quoting at him.’
Victoria was forced to admire the way Doctor Blake bottled up his rage; he even managed a laughing apology to Doctor van Schuylen, his pale eyes colourless with a dislike he almost, but not quite concealed. She shivered a little. He would be a bad enemy, she decided, studying his good looks, and then transferred her gaze to Doctor van Schuylen, still lolling, with a lazy, good-natured smile upon his face, just as though he was taking the other man’s apologies at face value. Surely he could see…? He turned to look at her and she realised that he certainly had seen; his eyes, in such a placid face, were very alert. She was so relieved that she smiled warmly at him and Sister Crow, catching her at it, gave an indignant snort and commanded: ‘Staff Nurse, be good enough to ask someone from the Path Lab to come here at once.’ She accompanied this command with a heavy frown. In her opinion, nurses—even staff nurses—did not smile at consultants, nor for that matter at any strange doctor who happened to turn up, especially the kind of smile Victoria had just given.
Victoria, aware of the Old Crow’s wrath, murmured: ‘Certainly, Sister,’ and went off down the ward and out of its door and into the office to telephone, something she did with dispatch and her usual competence, using only a small part of her brain to do so; the rest of it was deeply occupied by speculation upon Doctor van Schuylen’s sudden appearance, his probable departure and whether there was any likelihood of seeing more of him. She went back to the ward presently, the missing notes, which she had quite forgotten and which she had providentially discovered on Sister’s desk, under one arm. She added them tidily to their fellows and took up her station once more just behind Sister Crow without looking once at Doctor van Schuylen.
In fact, she studiously avoided his eye for the entire round—a fairly easy matter as it turned out, for Sister Crow saw to it that she was kept busy, and when the slow procession had at last wound its way out of the ward doors, Victoria, having made very certain that Dora had the right number of cups on the tray, was instructed to go back into the ward and make sure that the patients’ beds were tidied once more.
‘But have your coffee first, Staff Nurse,’ the Old Crow invited, and looked at the clock as she spoke so that Victoria would know that she had observed the time and would expect her back in ten minutes exactly.
Victoria, once in the main corridor, flew down it at a good speed; she seldom went to coffee break, for it was usual for the staff nurses to have coffee with Sisters on the ward, but on round days Sister Crow didn’t want her, and anyway, Victoria admitted fairly, the office didn’t accommodate more than four people in comfort and the Old Crow disliked people sitting on the floor or perching on the sides of her desk. The dining room was only half full, but there were several of her friends gathered round a table in a corner. She joined them with an eye on the clock as she did so. ‘Ten minutes,’ she exclaimed breathlessly, ‘Sister Crow made a note of it as I left.’
Kitty Blane from Women’s Medical groaned in sympathy. ‘I don’t know how you stand her!’ She filled a mug and pushed it across the table to Victoria. ‘How did the round go? What do you think of our Jeremy?’
Victoria blew on her coffee to cool it. ‘He’s all right, I suppose.’ She sounded doubtful. ‘I don’t know anything about him yet. He’s good-looking…’
‘Talking of good looks, did you get a sight of a tall dark and handsome stranger up your way? He came sauntering into ours about an hour ago and when I asked him what he wanted he said he was looking for Sir Keith Plummer, and when I told him where he was, he said: “Oh, yes—is that where the staff nurse has long bronze hair?” Someone you know, Vicky?’
‘Well, not really,’ said Victoria calmly, covering sudden feelings which weren’t calm at all. ‘Perhaps he mistook me for someone else.’ Even while she spoke she wondered how he had found out that she worked on Men’s Medical or if it had been coincidence. The latter, she decided, for was he not almost for certain a married man and had he at any time shown interest in her? Not to speak of. She grinned ruefully and Bunny Coles from Cas. asked:
‘Fed up, Vicky? I’m not surprised with the Old Crow always fussing around. When are you off?’
‘Five.’ Victoria put down her mug. ‘I must fly, you know what she is—all the beds to be tidy by the time she comes out of the office.’ She made a face. ‘So long, girls.’
There was no sign of anyone as she went back along the corridor and past Sister’s office, although there was a murmur of voices and a sudden burst of laughter. Sir Keith must have made a joke, for that was the only time Sister Crow laughed about anything. Victoria went into the ward, sent all but one nurse to their coffee and started to straighten the beds and to get out of bed all those patients who had been kept in them for the round. She had reached Mr Bates and had sent Nurse Black to fetch a cool drink for the still queasy old man when the ward door was swung open with a good deal of vigour and a firm footfall trod towards her. She knew who it was, of course, and turned to face him as he fetched up within a few inches of her. He said without preamble: ‘You’re off at five. I’ll be outside at five-thirty—no, five-forty-five, you’ll want to do that hair of yours. I should like to take you out.’
She stared at him speechlessly, delight and doubt warring with each other in her lovely face, and before she could reply Mr Bates answered for her in his dry old voice.
‘That’s right, you go, Staff. Have a bit of fun, yer must feel like it after the whole day here with the likes of us.’
‘No,’ said Victoria with a firmness denied by her eyes, ‘thank you.’
‘Why not?’
She glanced at Mr Bates, who said at once, ‘Cor, luv a duck, Staff, I’m stone deaf—can’t ’ear a word.’
She smiled at him. He’d been in number six bed for so long and he was really an old dear; all the same, she half turned away from him to say in a low voice: ‘You see, I don’t go out—with m-married men.’
‘Very laudable,’ commented Doctor van Schuylen approvingly. ‘Shall we make it five-thirty and never mind the hair?’
She raised enormous tawny eyes fringed with curling dark lashes and met his blue ones. There was a glint in them which made her blink and falter. ‘You are married?’
‘No,’ he answered coolly, ‘not yet.’ He said nothing further, only looked amused, and it was so obvious that he was awaiting an explanation that she began to explain. ‘Oh—well, you see you were dining with someone and she had a wedding ring, and the next day you had a little boy with you, and then I saw you with them…’
It was impossible to know what he was thinking, for his voice was as bland as his face and his eyes were almost covered by suddenly drooping lids.
‘Ah, yes—of course. A natural mistake, but a mistake. Shall we say half past five?’
The ward door was pushed open and allowed to close with a minimum of noise—Sister Crow. Victoria’s eyes met the Dutchman’s and Mr Bates said happily: ‘I ain’t ’eard a word, but ’ave a nice evening of it, the two of yer.’
‘Half past five,’ breathed Victoria, and began on Mr Bates all over again while she listened to the doctor, skilfully and with great charm, draw a variety of red herrings across the Old Crow’s path so that by the time she eventually reached Victoria she had quite forgotten why she had come into the ward.
Sister Crow had wanted an afternoon; Victoria, working through seemingly endless hours, prayed that she would come on duty as punctually as she usually did. She had been foolish, she decided as she prepared the medicine trolley for Sister’s use later on, to say half past five, for she would almost certainly be late, and supposing he didn’t wait? Supposing he were impatient? She contradicted herself; he wasn’t an impatient man, of that she was quite certain, although for the life of her she couldn’t guess how she knew that. She smiled with relief at the thought and Major Cooper, whom she was hauling back into bed after his afternoon exercises, stared at her.
‘What the devil have you got to smile about?’ he demanded irascibly. He was an ill-tempered old gentleman; that anybody would be otherwise was something he would not condone. Victoria had no intention of telling him, so instead she asked: ‘What do you think of the Government’s intention…’
It was a safe and sure red herring; he seized upon it and grumbled happily while she worked him out of his dressing gown and pulled on the woolly bedsocks he insisted upon wearing, and since she had heard it all before, it left her free to devote the greater part of her mind to the important question of what to wear that evening.
It was twenty minutes to six as she crossed the hospital entrance hall. The Old Crow had been punctual, but she had been chatty too, and it was all of a quarter past five by the time Victoria had got away. It was impossible to go to tea, and dinner, if that was the meal she hoped the doctor was inviting her to, was several hours off. She drank a glass of water from her toothmug and started tearing off her clothes. Luckily the bathrooms were empty and very few of her friends were about, and those who tried to engage her in conversation were told ‘No time’, and swept on one side. She was kneeling before the mirror in her room, because there were no stools before the dressing tables in the Home, putting her hair up very carefully, when the staff nurse on Children’s came in with a cup of tea. ‘Leave it if you haven’t time,’ she advised, ‘but I bet you didn’t get any—who’s the date?’
Victoria, her mouth pursed over hair-grips, made sounds indicative of not telling, but her friend disregarded them. ‘We think it’s the foreign doctor who went to Kitty’s ward.’
Victoria, having disposed of the grips, swallowed half a cup of tea.
‘Yes—well, we met while I was home—and don’t,’ she went on severely, ‘start any ideas. He’s only asked me out because he happened to meet me again—you know, being polite.’
She was wriggling into her dress—a very plain cinnamon-coloured wool—and her friend obligingly zipped her up the back before she spoke.
‘Why should he have to be polite?’ she asked forth-rightly. ‘I’ve never met a man yet who asked a girl out unless he wanted to.’
Victoria was head and shoulders inside the wardrobe and her voice was muffled. ‘Maybe he wants someone to listen to him while he talks,’ she suggested, and hoped not. She slid into the matching topcoat and dug her feet into brown patent shoes which had cost her a small fortune and flew to the door, snatching up her handbag as she went. ‘See you,’ she said briefly, and hurried downstairs.
He was leaning against the little window behind which Smith, the head porter, sat, enjoying a chat, but when he saw her he came to meet her across the linoleumed floor and without giving her a chance to say that she was sorry that she was late, swept her outside and across the forecourt to where a Mercedes-Benz 350SL coupé was standing. It had, Victoria’s sharp eyes noticed, a Dutch number-plate.
‘It is yours?’ she wanted to know as he opened the door for her to get in.
‘Yes.’ He shut her in with an almost silent snap of the handle and went round to his own seat.
‘You didn’t have it in Guernsey.’
‘No.’ He was sitting beside her now. ‘What a girl you are, always asking questions!’
‘I never—’ she began, and then remembered that she had asked him quite a lot and closed her pretty mouth firmly, thinking better of it.
‘Have you had tea?’ His voice was pleasantly friendly.
‘No—that is, I had some in a mug while I was changing.’
He nodded with the air of a man who was in the habit of drinking his own tea in such a manner. ‘I’ve brought a picnic basket with me, I thought we might run a little way out of town and have tea in the car and then go on somewhere for dinner.’ He glanced sideways at her and smiled. ‘Unless there’s something else you would rather do?’
There was nothing else that she would rather do; she said so.
‘Good—let’s go, then.’
It was the evening rush hour; she was relieved to find that not only did he drive very well indeed; he displayed none of the irritation or impatience she had come to expect from anyone negotiating London at such times; moreover he talked as he drove, an unhurried flow of smalltalk which put her at her ease. St Judd’s was in the East End, or almost so. He had left that part of the city far behind and was across the river, travelling in a south-western direction when she remarked: ‘You know London very well.’
‘You sound surprised.’ He didn’t give her any reason, though, but went on: ‘There’s a quiet pub at Abinger, we’ll go down through Leatherhead and turn off as soon as we can find a reasonably quiet spot for tea, and then go on to Abinger Hammer. I presume you don’t have to be in at ten o’clock or whenever you have your curfew.’
Victoria chuckled. ‘I’m exempt. Once we’re trained we’re allowed to stay out until a reasonable hour.’
He said ‘Good’ as he edged the car past a loaded van and then a string of slow-moving cars, and after a minute or two when it became apparent that he wasn’t going to say anything else for the time being, Victoria ventured: ‘Was it just…I mean, were you surprised to see me?’
‘I’m surprised each time I set eyes on you—you’re very lovely. You must get a little bored with being told that by all the men you meet.’
She remembered the last man to say that to her, Doctor Blake, and how she had hated it, yet now she was glowing with delight. She said with admirable calm: ‘It’s according to who says it, and if I were with my sisters no one would think of saying any such thing—they’re beautiful.’
He glanced at her. ‘Yes, they are.’ He turned the car off into a side road whose signpost said Walton-on-the-Hill, but after half a mile he turned it again, this time into a mere lane, saying: ‘Somewhere here, I should think, wouldn’t you? I’m not quite sure where we are, but we can look at the map presently.’
It was quiet and the late afternoon had brought a wintry nip with it. The doctor stretched behind him and produced a tea basket from the back of the car. ‘Do you want to stay in the car or shall we try outside?’ he enquired.
‘Outside,’ said Victoria promptly. ‘We can always get back in if it gets too cold, can’t we?’ She looked around her. ‘Look, there’s a little hollow there under the hedge, it shouldn’t be too bad.’ She looked up at him, laughing. ‘It’s fun, isn’t it, having a picnic tea at half past six in a dropping temperature?’
He laughed too as he got out to open her door and help her out and picked up the basket. ‘Yes,’ he said slowly, ‘but I fancy anything with you would be fun, Victoria.’
They had reached the little hollow and she stood looking down at her shoes, conscious of her quickened heartbeats. She said rather shyly:
‘It was strange that we should meet again,’ and looked at him startled when he gave a great rumble of laughter.
‘No,’ he said, still laughing, ‘not strange at all. I had this meeting arranged with Sir Keith Plummer; I had seen you board the boat for Weymouth and I heard your mother telling you to be sure and have breakfast on the train. I gambled on it being the London train and I already knew that you were a nurse.’
‘Oh? How?’
‘My friends knew someone who knows your father. It was only a question of enquiring at the London hospitals.’
She gaped at him. ‘You mean you didn’t know I was at St Judd’s? But you asked Kitty if there was a copper-headed nurse…’
He stared back at her, his eyes glinting with amusement. ‘I had resigned myself to visiting each hospital in turn, but luck was on my side, wasn’t it? You were in the very first one, and one, moreover, in which I have every right to be.’ He spread a rug on the bank and put the basket beside it and observed placidly: ‘You must be dying for your tea. Sit down and we’ll have it now or we shan’t have an appetite for dinner.’
Victoria sat down with the speechless obedience of a little girl while she sorted out the muddled thoughts surging around her head.
‘Why did you do it?’ she enquired at length.
He opened the hamper and took out the flask of tea and two cups as well as a variety of tidily wrapped sandwiches. He undid them, poured the tea, added milk and sugar, handed her a cup and proffered one of the packets, with the remark that the sandwiches were cucumber. She took one mechanically, feeling a little breathless and at a complete loss, an experience she had until then not had. She took a bite and drank some tea. ‘I still don’t see why…’ she began.
‘No? Never mind, let’s enjoy ourselves and be glad that we have been fortunate enough to meet again. Tell me about your work.’
He sounded like a big brother or a kindly uncle; she tidied away her disturbing, exciting thoughts and told him while he plied her with delicate sandwiches and little cakes and tea, which even from a thermos tasted delicious. He didn’t eat much himself, but Victoria hardly noticed that, for she was telling him all about the hospital and why she had trained as a nurse and how much she loved her home, but presently she came to a stop, peered at him through the gloom and asked: ‘And you? What part of Holland do you come from, and are you going to be in England long?’
‘The Hague. I have a practice there, though my home is just outside—in Wassenaar. My parents live in Leiden, my father is a doctor but more or less retired—he does consulting work and sits on various committees, and when I am away, as I am from time to time, he helps out with my practice. I have two brothers and two sisters, all younger than I, and all married.’ He paused and she knew that he was smiling at her through the dusk. ‘There, have I not answered all your questions before you could ask them?’
‘No—well, that is, almost. Are you here to lecture or were you on holiday in Guernsey?’
‘I’m here for a few days before I go up to Birmingham and Edinburgh and then back home. I was on holiday in Guernsey—I have friends there.’
Victoria started to re-pack the hamper. ‘You must be very clever,’ she began, ‘to lecture, you know. Are you older than you look?’
She heard his rumble of laughter. ‘That’s a difficult question, for I have no idea how I look, have I?’ He leaned over and fastened the tea basket and put out a hand to help her to her feet. ‘I’m thirty-five, give or take a month or two—almost eleven years older than you.’
She stopped in her tracks. ‘How did you know that?’
‘Oh, a friend of a friend, you know.’ His voice sounded casual as he opened the car door for her and then went to put the tea things in the boot. In the car beside her again he looked at his watch. ‘I booked a table for eight o’clock—supposing we cut down behind Hindhead and circle back?’
‘That would be nice, Doctor…’
‘My name’s Alexander,’ he prompted her mildly. ‘You may have noticed that I call you Victoria, for I find myself quite unable to address you as Miss Parsons. What are your sisters’ names?’
Victoria told him; she told him how old they were too and what they did with their days and how clever Amabel was with her sketching and what a formidable couple Stephanie and Louise were on the tennis court. One thing led to another; by the time they arrived at the Abinger Hammer, she had told him a great deal without being aware of it; it was only afterwards she realised that he had told her only the barest facts about himself.
They had leisurely drinks in the bar of the peaceful old pub and dined off Chicken Savoyarde, followed by chocolate roulade washed down with white burgundy. They went back into the bar for their coffee, sitting at a little table in the now crowded room with so much to talk about that they hardly noticed the cheerful noise around them. It was only when the landlord called, ‘Time, gentlemen, please,’ that Victoria broke off in mid-sentence. ‘It can’t be as late as that already,’ she exclaimed. ‘We’ve never been here as long as that?’
Doctor van Schuylen laughed. ‘Indeed we have. Are you in a hurry to get back?’
‘No—’ She paused. ‘That is, I mustn’t be too late because I’m on in the morning and I must make up a clean cap…’
He laughed again and she flashed at him: ‘That sounds like a silly excuse, but it isn’t.’
He stared at her across the table. The gleam in his eyes could have been amusement, she didn’t know, but perhaps it wasn’t after all, for he said gravely: ‘I know it isn’t, Victoria, I know you well enough for that.’ He smiled gently at her and her heart rocked against her ribs.
‘I shall take you straight back and you shall make up your cap and have your beauty sleep—not,’ he added softly, ‘that you need it.’
‘Oh, I do,’ she contradicted him, ‘it’s been quite a day on the ward.’
Just as though she hadn’t spoken, he added: ‘You’re beautiful enough as it is.’
She got into the car wordlessly. That was the second time he had called her beautiful and she was astonished at the delight she felt—just as though he were the first man ever to have said so. She considered the idea for a moment; he was the first man—none of the other men counted any more.
She was rather quiet on the trip back because she had a good deal to think about, but he didn’t seem to notice, rambling on in a placid fashion about topics which must have been of so little importance that she was unable to remember anything about them later, only the pleasant sound of his voice—a quiet, calm voice, and deep. She liked listening to it.
They arrived back at St Judd’s just before midnight and although she hastened to say: ‘Don’t get out—I’m going through the hospital to the Home,’ he ignored her and got out too and walked with her to the big front doors. When she thanked him for her evening he said:
‘It was delightful—I shall remember it while I’m away.’
‘Oh yes.’ She felt bereft. ‘Birmingham and Edinburgh.’
He nodded without speaking and after a moment she put out a hand.
‘Well, goodbye, Alexander. I hope you have a good trip. I don’t know Birmingham, but Edinburgh’s beautiful and there’s a lot to see.’
‘You know it? So do I—I’ve an Edinburgh degree.’
He was still holding her hand and when she pulled on it gently he merely tightened his grip and said: ‘I shan’t have much time for sightseeing, I must get back to Holland as soon as possible.’
‘Yes, of course.’ She made her voice sound coolly friendly, for after all, what was theirs but a casual meeting? And this time he let her hand go. She said, maintaining the coolness with difficulty: ‘Well, goodbye, and thank you again,’ then whisked through the door and across the hall and out of sight of him.
If Victoria wanted to forget him, she had no chance; her friends, during the next few days, saw to that, for they wanted to know every detail of her evening with him and then fell to discussing him at length and often, and when Tilly had exclaimed: ‘He turns me on,’ Victoria had felt a pang in her chest which was almost physical and no amount of reasonable thinking could dispel him entirely from her thoughts. After the first day or so she managed to convince herself that he had gone for good. There must be girls enough for him to choose from if he wanted an evening out; probably he had forgotten her already—a sensible thought which did nothing to dispel a sense of loss which bewildered her. She worked a little harder in order to get rid of it and when Doctor Blake invited her to go to the cinema with him, she accepted, although she wasn’t really keen on going.
Jeremy Blake had behaved well, rather to her surprise, for he struck her as being a young man conceited enough to expect a quick conquest of any girl he cast his eyes upon, but beyond an attempt to hold her hand in the cinema which she parried without difficulty, he did nothing to which she could take exception, and when she was bidding him goodnight at the door of the Nurses’ Home with a rather brisk thank you, he had been equally casual. She had gone up to her room convinced that she had been mistaken about him after all—he was really not too bad and certainly not the wolf she had suspected.
His behaviour bore out her opinion during the subsequent days—he was friendly in a casual way both on the ward and when they met outside it, and when Ellen, the night staff nurse and one of Victoria’s closest friends, remarked one morning after she had given the report that she didn’t fancy him at all, Victoria had felt impelled to defend him.
‘He’s quite nice,’ she remarked. ‘I didn’t think I was going to like him, but he’s quiet and just friendly.’
Ellen sauntered towards the door. ‘As long as he stays that way,’ she said darkly.
It was two days later that he asked Victoria to go out with him again and she refused. Afterwards she didn’t know why she had done so, for he had proved a pleasant enough companion when they had gone to the cinema. Perhaps it was because he had suggested that they should go to a little club he knew of in Chelsea and dance that she had refused so promptly. He had said nothing, only shrugged his shoulders and said carelessly: ‘Another time, perhaps,’ but his eyes had seemed paler than ever even though he was smiling.
She hardly thought about him during the day; they were busy and although he came on to the ward several times, the only speech they had was to do with the patients.
She met him on the way off duty that evening. Men’s Medical was on the top floor, reached by a bleak corridor of the narrow, dreary type so beloved by mid-Victorian architects of hospitals. It ran through most of the wing and then turned at right angles to continue on its way to an equally bleak staircase. It was depressing, with margarine-coloured walls and mud-coloured linoleum, polished to within an inch of its life. Victoria was perhaps halfway down this miserable passage when Jeremy Blake appeared around the corner ahead of her. He was walking very fast and she supposed him to be on his way to the ward, but when he drew level with her he stopped suddenly and caught her round the waist.
‘And what do you think you’re doing?’ she demanded in a voice chilled with angry surprise.
‘Oh, come off it, Vicky, you don’t have to play the little lady with me.’
He laughed at her and for answer she attempted to remove his hands, but he only went on laughing and pulled her closer. ‘We could have fun together.’
‘I can think of nothing less likely,’ she retorted indignantly. His face was only inches from hers and although he smiled his eyes glittered and his mouth looked mean. ‘Let go!’ she ordered him furiously. ‘I don’t want to go out with you, I said so and I meant it, and I certainly wouldn’t want to go out with you again or have anything more to do with you!’
She lifted a capable hand, doubled into a fist, and pummelled his chest.
‘Playing hard to get?’ he wanted to know. ‘Shall I tell you something, girlie? I always get a bird if I want her, and here’s something on account.’
His face was very close. Victoria lifted a foot, neatly shod in its hospital regulation lace-up, and kicked his shin, and he loosened his hold. In a flash she was away, making for the bend in the passage. Once round it the stairs would be in sight and there might be someone about…
He caught up with her a couple of feet from the corner and clamped his hand on to her shoulders and forced her to a halt, turning her around to face him, but not without difficulty because she was a strong girl, then putting a hand under her chin to force her face up to his. ‘You spitfire,’ his voice was soft and unpleasant, ‘now you’ve fooled about enough!’
She couldn’t move her head, his hand was too strong. ‘I’ll scream!’ She spoke with spirit and stopped at his smile.
‘And a lot of good that will do you—you see, I shall say that I found you hysterical on my way to the ward, and you won’t stand a chance, my dear. I’ve done it before and it always works…’ He broke off, his smile frozen.
‘Er—so sorry to interrupt,’ said Doctor van Schuylen gently from somewhere behind her left ear, ‘but I think you’ve got it wrong, my dear fellow.’
Victoria felt his hand, gentle and strong, on her waist and the next moment she had been whisked to one side, allowing the doctor just enough room to knock Doctor Blake down, having done which he dusted his hands off carefully, turned his back on the prostrate form and said with an air of calm, ‘Hullo’. The smile he gave her was so kind that she would have liked to have burst into tears, but before she could do so he went on: ‘I wondered if we might go out to dinner—somewhere gay where we can dance.’ He was walking her round the corner and down the stairs as he spoke, and at the bottom Victoria stopped and put out a hand to touch his well-tailored sleeve almost timidly.
‘I must explain,’ she began, but was stopped by his quiet voice.
‘Not a word, Victoria, or I might be tempted to go back and knock the fellow down again.’
She was very sure he meant it. ‘Are you angry? He’ll be all right, won’t he?’
She felt it was a foolish question, but he stopped then, right outside Women’s Surgical where one of the Office Sisters was taking the report from Sister Kennedy. He said simply: ‘Yes, I’m angry, but don’t worry, I have an excellent control over my temper and he’s not much hurt, I believe.’ He smiled at her and she found herself smiling back. ‘I’ll be very quick,’ she assured him. ‘What time will you come for me?’
He looked at his watch. ‘Seven sharp—I must go back to the hotel and put on a black tie.’ He took her hand and held it for a moment in his and didn’t let it go when the Office Sister walked towards them. She wished them a civil good evening, looking at them with purposeful vagueness which Victoria found rather touching. She liked Office Sister, who was a widow with grown-up children, so that she treated the nurses rather in the same manner as she would have used towards her own children, and was loved for it.
When she had gone, Alexander gave her back her hand. ‘I’ll come with you as far as the Home,’ he stated calmly. ‘Do you mind where we go this evening?’
Victoria shook her head. She would have been quite happy sitting in a Wimpy Bar with him for the whole evening. At the Home door she tried to thank him again and he said: ‘No, Victoria, there’s no need to say any more— I’m only sorry I wasn’t there a few minutes sooner.’
She had her hand on the door handle. ‘I kicked him on the shin,’ she observed with belated satisfaction.
She was looking at him as she spoke and he smiled: ‘That’s my girl!’
Victoria went on staring at him. That was exactly what she was and she had only just discovered it. His girl—for ever and ever and nothing could change that. She had often wondered what it would feel like to fall in love—really in love—and now she had, suddenly. It left her bewildered and uncertain and wildly happy. She gave him a dazzling smile, repeated ‘Seven o’clock’, and went through the door.