“So, Hamilton doesn’t know?” Adrian prompts, raising her brow.
I explain to Adrian the events that occurred after the bonfire party his last night in town. Then I share my fear the day I took the pregnancy test. “After my initial freak out, I realized if I told Hamilton I was pregnant he would give up baseball and takeover the farm in Athens.” I glance down at Bella before I continue. “You know I’m right. There is no way he would have chased his baseball dream and I couldn’t be the reason he gave it up. I plan to tell him. I planned to tell him this past winter, but he was so busy that Salem’s wedding is the only time we could get together. I didn’t want to take away from Salem’s special day and I can’t tell him over the phone. I wanted to let him settle into Major League Baseball so when I introduced Liberty to him, he would consider continuing his baseball career.”
“Adrian, I love him so much it is killing me to keep them apart.” I don’t fight my tears. “He wouldn’t have given it a second thought. He would have taken over his family farm so that he could provide the security and financial support we would need. Then every time he drove by the ballpark or watched a game on TV he would have resented me for getting pregnant. I just couldn’t steal his dream from him.” I wipe my tears as I clear my throat.
“Liberty turned one on March 10th. I was so excited when you gave birth to Bella two days before Libby’s birthday. During all of our video calls when Bethany and you discussed your children growing up together, I longed for you to know about my daughter and realize our children are just a year apart.”
Adrian wipes tears from her eyes. I know it is the post-partum hormones as my friend Adrian is too strong to cry. I know she hates feeling weak, so I ignore them.
“She’s gorgeous. I love her curls and her dark eyes. And she has her daddy’s height, too. There’s no way anyone can deny she is Hamilton’s little girl.” Adrian pulls her eyes from Libby playing on the floor and returns them to me. “It’s got to be hard looking at her every day and her reminding you of Hamilton while he is so far away.”
I share with Adrian our love for watching Hamilton pitch during Cubs games. I tell her about the many video-journal clips I have created for him. I share how Alma assists me in caring for Libby while I am on the phone with Hamilton or the girls, how she cares for her when I must return to Athens, how her three children have adopted me as their little sister, and how I struggle every day to plan a time and way to talk to Hamilton.
“I’ve purchased a twelve-month calendar and keep it on my desk in my room. I asked Alma to ensure that I introduce Liberty to Hamilton before the end of the year. Each day I cross off knowing I am getting closer to the day I will tell him. He’ll be done with his season in October. I will then have two months to make it happen.” My tears return.
“Adrian, I’ve put it off for too long. I worry by delaying another year, I may hurt any chance I have of being with Hamilton after he meets Liberty. I’ve always intended to tell him. I only postponed so that he could settle in the MLB. I love him, and I want him to play baseball. I just couldn’t take that away from him.” Tears trail down my cheeks—I wipe them before they can fall on a sleeping Bella. I lift her tiny head, so I can place a kiss upon her forehead.
“He loves you, too.” I lift my eyes from Bella in my arms toward her mother. “His kiss at Salem’s wedding proves his intentions. He wants you.” Adrian pauses to wave at Libby when she turns her way. “Did Hamilton share anything while the two of you were at his mom’s? Any clues to how he wants the relationship to work?”
Liberty stands and toddles to me. “Dada?” She points at Adrian. My adorable daughter heard Adrian refer to Hamilton by name. “Dada?”
I extend my arm around her waist and lift her into the open side of my lap. “Yes, Adrian said Hamilton.”
Libby waves at Adrian. “Dada…” She continues jabbering words that I have no idea what she is saying.
Adrian smiles at me. I tell her about the photos of Hamilton we keep visible and how we watch him pitch and point to him on the TV. With her short attention span, Libby slides down and turns to me. She says Alma’s name and I let her know she can go find Alma in the kitchen.
While I look at Bella I answer Adrian’s questions. “We didn’t discuss a relationship, per se. He was very drunk when I got him home on Saturday. He barely made it to his bedroom before he began vomiting. He laid on the bathroom floor and got sick all down the front of him. When he took off his t-shirt it got in his hair. I had to undress him and put him into the shower. He was better after that, so I went to my room. I couldn’t sleep. Hours later, I went to the bathroom and popped my head in just to check on him. He was awake and spotted me. Knowing how I struggle to sleep, he invited me to lay beside him.” I shrug and sigh before I share the rest of the events from the next morning. Of course, Adrian asks for every detail when I confess we had sex again. Unlike her, I don’t share in great detail.
“So, he laid that kiss on you in front of all of us to let us know he loves you. But he didn’t plan out times for the two of you to meet, date, and stuff?” Now knowing all the details, Adrian seems as confused as I am.
Liberty runs into the living room announcing Alma’s name. Alma follows her, places drinks on the coffee table, announces I have hogged Bella long enough, and steals her from my arms.
Later, as we eat a light lunch Alma prepared Adrian fake pouts across from me. When I inquire what’s wrong she asks if Bethany has already met Liberty. I remind her Bethany’s trip to Columbia was a surprise and I didn’t plan for her to learn my secret before anyone else. I ask if Bethany knew Adrian was driving down today and she states she only told Winston at breakfast this morning. Good. I hope Bethany would have called to warn me if she knew what Adrian had planned.
Our afternoon together flies by. Adrian plays with Libby while Alma and I take turns holding Bella. Mid-afternoon Adrian leaves in order for her to arrive home before dark. At the end of it all, I’m glad Adrian surprised me today—I’m glad she now knows. Bethany and Adrian’s reactions give me hope that Hamilton, his family, and my other friends will understand my reasoning when I introduce Liberty.