File under “Pluralizationses”: In a thousand years, childrenses may not be an inappropriate plural.
Everything You Know About English Is Wrong
211
“You childrens go out and play!”
That’s bad grammar in that made-up quote, right? Agreed. After all, why should you pluralize an already plural noun? We could say that it’s proper to instead say, “You children go out and play!” But then I would again retort, why should you pluralize an already plural noun?
In Old English, the plural of child was childer, using -er as the indicator of plural. But in Middle English, speakers began adding the -en convention in the line of brethren, plural of brother. So, perhaps we could say that it’s proper to instead say, “You childer go out and play!”
To which I would again retort, why should you pluralize an already plural noun? In older Old English, the plural of child was child, just as deer and moose are both singular and plural. “You child go out and play! That’s the fourth time I’ve told you!”
So, because we’ve pluralized the pluralized version of the plural by jury-rigging the word children, why not keep the momentum further pluralizing to the form childrens. . . which, by the way is a documented plural of the word for young’ns (along with childs, childe and childers. . .). What’s a mother to do?