I sure had a good day’s sleep after all that fun in the snow. But I woke up last night to a total NIGHTMARE—a hissing green face with gaping eyes and a twisted smile. It took me a few seconds to realize it was just my sister Chloe.
She was sitting on my new sled, and she had a demand. “Give me an emerald.”
I reminded her that I already HAD given her one yesterday.
I think she’s been watching WAY too many action flicks with Dad lately.
So I marched over to my broken piggybank and showed her that I was fresh out of emeralds, thanks to her.
She said that wasn’t her problem and that I needed to pay her an emerald a day, EVERY day, or she was gonna tell Mom and Dad what I did with all the emeralds they gave me.
SERIOUSLY??? I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again. There’s NO WAY that creep is my twin. I couldn’t have shared an egg with her for even a second. I would have blasted my way out, for sure.
At least now that we’re older, I can tell her to get out of my room. So I did. And I slid the sled back under my bed.
Then I sat there trying to figure out how I was going to make enough emeralds to buy presents for Creeper’s Eve AND pay off Chloe to keep her big mouth shut.
I came up with all kinds of genius ideas for how to earn emeralds.
But every single one had something to do with my new sled. The one hiding under my bed. The one that I probably won’t be able to use. EVER.
So after dinner, I asked my dad for advice on how to get a job.
Chloe was on dish duty, and I hoped she wouldn’t hear me over the running water. But she must have, because she snorted and gave me a smirk. She probably felt super powerful, like it was all because of her that I was looking for ways to kick-start my career.
But I just ignored her and looked the other way. Which brought me face to face with Cate. YIKES.
I guess when we went shopping the other night, she bought herself a brand-new look. I gotta say, I’m not really loving the spiky green wig. But I learned a long time ago that if I can’t say something nice about Cate’s new looks, I should just keep my creeper mouth shut.
Dad seemed all proud that I was looking for work. He said maybe I could help him clear snow on the creeper cul-de-sac where we live.
I wasn’t so sure about that. I mean, if it’s SNOWING outside, I’ve really got to hit the sledding hills. That’s the only way I’m ever going to become the Overworld’s greatest sledding creeper. But I told Dad I appreciated his suggestion.
When Mom heard me talking about getting a job, she got all teary-eyed and said we were growing up way too fast.
And she added that we really needed to spend more family time together this year, because pretty soon my sisters and I would be all grown-up and would move away to the Extreme Hills or something.
Well, I knew I had to get out of there—FAST—before she decided we needed to spend a family night together. I had places to go and things to do and emeralds to earn. So I said that I was meeting Sam over at the sledding hill again tonight.
But Mom wasn’t done with me yet. No, sirree. She told me it was cold outside and that I had to wear my super-itchy wool sweater. ARGH.
That sweater is about the ugliest thing I own. Plus, it REALLY messes with my psoriasis (SORE-EYE-A-SIS). That’s just a fancy word for itchy skin. Which I have. Which is how I got the nickname “Itchy.” But that’s another story.
By the time I got to the sledding hill, my back was on FIRE with itchiness. I stopped at every tree I could find to give it a good scratch.
But when I saw mobs sledding down the hill and building snow forts, I remembered two things: Sam’s sled, and the snow golems we’d built. Where were they?
I didn’t see the golems anywhere. They must have slipped and slid off into the sunrise.
But Sam’s sled was back. And so was Sam. I could hear him bawling from about fifty feet away. Yup, that slime was crying big slimy tears. His whole body was shaking and hiccupping.
Then I saw why. His sled was in BAD shape. Bones had brought it back, but he must have used it for target practice first. There were dents and scratches all over it from arrow tips—or bony skeleton fingers. A big crack ran straight across the middle.
Sam looked up at me through a mess of snot and tears. I was afraid those tears would freeze on his face and end up looking like witch warts. I had to do something, FAST.
And that was when I had my most genius idea ever. I told Sam he could borrow MY sled.
I know, that was pretty generous of me. But it also meant I could use my sled whenever I want. And no one would know it belongs to me. I mean, except for Chloe. But once that sled is in Sam’s hands, it’s Chloe’s hiss against mine. My Evil Twin is going DOWN.
Sam, on the other hand, perked right up. (That slime always bounces back.) He led the way to my house to get the sled.
Luckily, Chloe was gone by then. She was probably off blowing up someone’s snow fort or something.
Dad was clearing snow from the sidewalk, and Mom was helping Cammy build her own tiny snow golem in the front yard.
When Mom asked me and Sam if we knew where to find a pumpkin, we both shook our heads. The last thing I wanted was to go looking for another wormy old Jack o’ Lantern. GROSS.
So I gave Cammy a mushroom to use for a head instead. I keep a pile of them near the front door to fling at the neighbor’s ocelot, Sir Coughs-a-Lot. I don’t HURT him; I just scare him away before he can get too close to me. Did I mention I don’t like cats? Don’t get me started. That’s a whole other story.
Anyway, the mushroom head didn’t work and the golem DIDN’T come to life. (Big surprise there.) Cammy was so disappointed, her face got all red and scrunched up. Then she blew sky high, and it “snowed” gunpowder all over the yard.
For once, I was glad for the Exploding Baby’s short fuse. See, after that, Mom was so busy trying to help Cammy pull herself together, she didn’t notice when we sneaked into the house and back out again with the sled.
Sam and I had a BLAST on the snow hill. We stayed out all day, and I can barely keep my eyes open tonight. But now I’m well on my way to becoming the Overworld’s greatest sledding creeper. And I’m only a couple of days into my 30-day plan!
