Britta dressed the wound on my lower back so I could wear a proper dress, threw my blue gown from Elvage over my head and sent me on my way in a matter of twenty minutes. I still looked like I’d lost a fight with a pillowcase full of batteries, but it was an improvement nonetheless.
The marketplace was visible from the docks, which gave me just enough tether to leave my laplanded buddy on the boat so he could rest.
Jens was invisible as he walked behind me, whispering funny or crude things over my shoulder as we made our way to the marketplace. Commerce was just beginning to stir at the first sight of the sun on the horizon. He directed me to the different booths and told me what to order. Some of the things I could carry, but others had to be delivered. I paid probably too much extra to have them delivered immediately, waiting at the booth until I verified someone left with the goods to place in Foss’s ship with Alrik to sign for it, or however they did things like that here. I really missed the internet, and knew I could secure all these things with a few easy clicks.
I bought too much food, a few dresses for me and Britta, and new clothes for the guys, all except Tor. They didn’t sell dwarf clothing anywhere I saw. He’d just have to love the new axe I had sent to the ship. I purchased an assortment of artillery that Jens instructed me on. Bows and arrow, knives of all sizes and shapes, and a few other weapons I hoped we would never have to use were sent to the ship. I ordered a case of Gar from a vendor I knew Foss liked, dozens of fur blankets, soap, a few hambones for Henry Mancini, and whatever else Jens requested over my shoulder.
My eyes landed on a beaded purple nightgown that I was drawn to magnetically. I flashed Foss’s ring and bought the purple one for Britta and a black one for me. Let Jamie try and forget he’s in love with her in that. I felt Jens’s hand trace my hip, and I shivered.
Foss needed new boots, and I got all the small things he liked that I’d found around the house. His soap, towels, clothing, cheese, and most important of all, a fiddle. They had the garden variety for sale, but when I saw one that had clusters of grapes carved into the sleek body, I knew I had to get it for him. The curves of the instrument were almost sexy, and though I’d never played an instrument before, I wished for the skill.
Most of the merchants did not question my authority over Foss’s estate. Word had spread of the “Guldy” Foss had acquired, and they referred to me as such, staring at me as I went. One of the vendors requested I show him Foss’s ring to verify the purchase. I heard Jens’s strangled whine of fury when he saw Foss’s crest branded on my chest. I stepped back and pressed my heel onto his toe to remind him to keep his cool.
“I’m going to murder that man in his sleep,” he whispered.
“You’ll do no such thing,” I said quietly. “It was an accident from the fire. Chill.”
We finished up and walked back to the boats with the last delivery man, passing several coming back from the ship on the way. Uncle Rick’s eyes were wide at the bounty stacked up in crates all around him. “I guess it’s best you never got yourself a credit card,” he remarked.
“They didn’t have any pink ponies for sale.” I did a good “aw shucks” gesture for his amusement. “Foss told me to max out his accounts. I did the best I could, but I didn’t even make a dent. Kind of a rush, but when you’re thinking someone’s going to set your escape vehicle on fire, it takes a little something out of the thrill. Plus, no heels. What’s a shopping spree without a decent pair of frivolous high heels?”
“It’s the one thing Undra’s missing.” Jens peeked at my scar as he hopped off the plank and into the ship. He untied the line after verifying we had all our stuff, and we were off.
Jens had instructed me to purchase a few hammocks and set about installing them with Jamie’s help. I showed Britta the purple nightgown that really was more modest than most of the dresses Tonya wore, but Britta blushed as she pushed it back into my arms. “I can’t wear that!”
“It’s no more racy than the stuff I had to wear,” I protested. I looked it over. It wasn’t sheer. It was normal dress material that hung to the ground. The only difference was the obvious display of breasts. “You don’t have to wear it, but I highly doubt you have enough clothes. You’ve been switching between that dress and your one from Elvage and the kilt for weeks. Might be nice to have something comfortable to sleep in.” I draped it over her shoulder. “Plus, Foss owes you a few good moments for giving you so many bad ones over the course of this trip. He paid for it, so you might as well enjoy it.”
Britta looked over the thing of scandal and beauty with trepidation and desire. “I don’t know what to say.”
“Say you’ll wear it and give it lots of use.”
“I’ll think about it.”
I could tell she’d tried it on when we sat down for dinner a few hours later. Her cheeks were pink and she could barely look at Jamie, casting me conspiratorial looks throughout the meal. Half of the group was ravenous; they’d not eaten proper meals on their journey to and from the Fossegrimen portal. We went through quite a bit of the fresh food in one go. I wondered how long the journey would be, and hoped I’d gotten enough supplies for it.
Foss was silent and sullen throughout dinner. He kept his head bowed over his plate and hunched with his elbows on the table. I don’t exactly know how it happened, but I’d somehow become the only person he would interact with. When I noticed halfway through the meal that he hadn’t touched a bite, I nudged the grump next to me, speaking quietly to him while everyone else carried on lively conversations. “Foss, you should eat something. When was the last time you ate?”
He shrugged. “I’m not hungry.”
I placed my hand on his bare back and rubbed soothing circles, taking care not to brush over his many injuries. “The fresh food won’t last long, and then it’s beef jerky till the cows come home.”
He kept his eyes from me and focused on his food. “I hate when you’re nice to me.”
I sat up straighter. “I don’t actually care what you think you hate. Do you care that I think you’re a horrible person who isn’t capable of real growth? No. We’ll get through the rest of the trip however we can. Then when it’s over, you’ll be rid of me. You can be all kinds of happy then.” I took a bite of a tomato and sighed at the purity of the taste. “I have it in my day planner. Destroy portal, be rid of Foss. Step one, step two.”
Foss did a silent snort at my humor, but still did not eat.
I picked up my plate and his, nodding toward a spot near the back of the boat. “Come on.”
I kissed Jens on the forehead before leading Foss off away from the group. I pointed to a spot where we could eat on the floor and see the ocean. When he sat down, I could tell it cost a great effort.
“You sound like an old man,” I commented as Henry Mancini scampered toward me and snuggled onto my lap.
Foss grunted as he shifted next to me, both of us facing out onto the water.
I handed him his plate and continued eating as I talked, using my dog’s back as a table to balance my plate on. “I was never as rich as you are.”
“As I was,” Foss corrected, staring out at the waves with a hard expression, as if he was daring the ocean to give solace neither of them possessed. “I’m dead now with nothing to my name.”
“I didn’t have as much to lose, but I understand a little of what you’re going through.”
He gave me a good “pfft” laced with his superior attitude. “You couldn’t possibly.”
I settled in for a barrage of his mean behavior and muscled through. “Everything I’ve ever owned was burned to the ground. My few friends think I’m dead, too. When I get back to my world, I’ll start a new life in yet another new place by myself.” I considered this, then amended my statement. “Well, with Jens, luckily. Sound like anyone you know?”
Foss stared at me, finally paying attention to something other than his pain. “I didn’t know that.”
I chewed on another tomato and wished for twenty more. “The things you don’t know about the people around you could fill a book. Just because I’m not important to you doesn’t mean I’m not important.” I sighed, lowering my voice. “I’ve never had a home to live in for more than half a year. And every time I’ve had to pick up and leave, the place behind me was cleaned out or burned up. Sometimes it was ordered by Jens, who I didn’t know at the time.”
Foss said nothing, so I assumed he was still listening. At least he wasn’t tearing me down or arguing. Progress.
“I had two awesome parents and a twin brother who was my best friend. I lost them all on the same day. I know twenty isn’t as young where you’re from, but it’s young for my world. I was on my own, and had to make a decision whether I would wither away or climb out of my depression and claw my way back to the world. You have to make that same decision.” I picked a grape off my plate and put it in his hand. “You’re eating,” I commanded gently.
Without considering his stalemate on food, Foss popped the grape into his mouth, and I could see a small amount of life flicker inside of him.
“I know you don’t think much of me, but I mattered to exactly three people who I would have died for. Every day without them, I’m a little less. Less fun. Less happy. Just… less.” I knew I was treading on dangerous ground, giving the pit bull ammunition, but I trudged onward, knowing he couldn’t really get much more surly, ammunition or not. “I’m sorry you lost Kirstie because of me. I didn’t mean to make her so mad, honest. I know she made you happy, and I would never want to take that away from you. You didn’t seem like you had a whole lot of happy in your life.”
Foss ate a second grape without coaxing. “There’s more to life than smiling.”
“True. I can’t imagine there’s much of a life without it, though.”
“Your world is frivolous,” he ruled, spearing a tomato with his fork.
“And your world is mean.” I shrugged. “And you can’t go back there. You’ll start a new life somewhere else. Best learn to adapt.”
He nodded, and I took that as a sign that I was finally getting through his thick skull.
“For what it’s worth, I’m sorry you lost your home. It was beautiful, and I could tell you worked hard to make it yours. Your servants loved you, though I’m not totally sure why.” I ventured a glance in his direction. “You seemed less of a prick there, too.”
He did not have anything to say to this, so he huffed at me.
“You don’t know much about my world or me, and if we last through Elvage, you’ll come with me to the Other Side. I gotta tell you, if you push me around, talk down to people or be your usual charming self, you’re likely to get shot if you’re in the wrong neighborhood.”
“I can handle arrows.”
I chuckled. “Oh, lovebug. We have guns, not arrows. Far more deadly. You hit the wrong person, you’ll just up and get yourself killed. It’s your choice, but I thought you’d like the chance to start over. You all never bothered to explain the different cultures to me, and that sucked. You should know what’ll be expected of you.”
“I can’t imagine I’d do well in your world.”
I put down my plate and turned to face him. “Adapt or die, Foss. It doesn’t much matter what you want or how you feel you should be able to behave. Adapt or die, starting with not being such a jerk.” I touched his hand, not letting him flinch away from me. “You have an opportunity for rebirth here. A chance to change. My advice? Take that chance.”
Foss eyed me with skepticism to cover over a heavy heart. “I liked my life. I don’t want to give that up.”
I shrugged. “You don’t have a choice.” I squinted at him. “And I thought you were strong. I adapted in your world. Guess that makes me stronger than you.” I took a grape from his plate and popped it in my mouth. “I figured as much.”
Foss glared at my thievery and I smiled, knowing that was a sign he still had fight in him. If he had fight, there was a chance he could rise to the occasion and someday be a better person.
“Oh! I forgot. You can have your ring back.” I reached for the knot to untie the leather strap.
He placed his large hand over the ring on my sternum. “Keep it until we get over to the Other Side. You and this ship are the only things I still own. Dead or not, my name will help you through Undraland.”
My mouth tightened. “I hate you so much. You don’t own me. No one owns me.”
Foss straightened, his hand still resting on my chest. “I paid for you. Weapons, shoes, clothes, women. I buy it, it makes it mine. I. Own. You.”
Henry Mancini sensed my anger and snarled at Foss until he removed his hand from me. My upper lip curled as I flipped through my mental Rolodex of horrible things to say in response. I landed on taking the high road. Thanks a lot, Martin Luther King. “Well, I tried. And technically, you’re a dead man, so you own nothing. This ship is friggin’ mine, oh darling husband. If I was being a jerk, I’d say the ring is mine, too. And your remains, which means, you. So, technically? Technically, I own you.” I stood and ruffled his short hair. “Suck on that, princess.”