Ambivalence

When the shutters are down

the outside work is pleasanter

even when fingers out of the mitts

go numb on the hammer;

the boathouse whispered with

ice-splinters and slush when I fetched the ladder.

We’ll have to deal with the chimney

before we can warm the place up

inside, and then the cleaning out and sweeping up

will be dirty jobs before it’s safe

to light the kindling, inside.

After the shutters are up

let’s build a fire

out here: there’s wood

under the cottage; we can

open the thermos and eat our lunch

before we tackle the rest?

It’s pleasurable outside.

Being inside will be good when we’re

in and out all the time. It can be cosy

when rain is drumming the roof — but that

fireplace sometimes smokes.

In mid-July

it’s stifling under the shingles

even after a midnight swim.

On such a night it is pleasanter

under the stars, outside.

We’ve never been here when it’s

outside only wherever you might

need to be to do

whatever needed doing —

after the local wood-and-ice fellow who

helps us has cleared the roof from a heavy snow

and left again.

Then would it still be

better outside alone, only outside?