CHAPTER 21

Las Vegas, apparently.

“Omigosh!” I said, sitting up and staring out the big picture window of the RV. I’d been asleep on one of its dining benches when the sound of a car backfiring woke me up.

My exclamation sent a toad flying across the table to the bench on the other side, where Olivia was sleeping. It landed on her pillow, right by her face.

Croak.

My stepsister cracked open an eyelid and screamed. Diamonds and daffodils scattered in every direction as she flopped around in her sleeping bag like a beached seal. In her panic to get away from the toad, she slid off the bench and onto the floor of the RV with a thud.

“Girls!” scolded Pearl, hoisting herself up onto her elbow and scowling at us from her makeshift bed on the sofa a few feet away. “What in tarnation is going on?”

“Toad!” cried Olivia, pointing frantically at the creature that was still squatting on her pillow.

“LOOK!” I cried, popping out another one as I pointed frantically at the window.

The two of them turned and gasped. The giant redwood trees had completely vanished. In their place a vast cityscape of neon sprawled out before us, blinking and flashing against the night sky. Hotels and casinos, billboards and pyramids, the Statue of Liberty and the Eiffel Tower—I even spotted a pirate ship in a lake-size fountain, and a roller coaster atop a high-rise. Every single square inch was bathed in garish light. I wondered fleetingly how many lightbulbs it took to run a city like this. Millions? Billions? It was as over the top and eye-boggling as Olivia’s gem-encrusted version of Geoffrey’s bedroom.

“Holy sweet whistling Annie,” whispered Pearl. “What are we doing in Vegas?”

Great-Aunt Abyssinia poked her head around the half wall that separated the driver’s seat from the rest of the RV. “Ah, sorry, girls—just a little detour,” she said sheepishly, wrestling with a large map. “I made a wrong turn a ways back.”

Wrong turn? We were in Nevada! Great-Aunt Aby had messed up again!

“Where’s my car?” asked Pearl, sounding anxious.

“Safe and sound,” my great-aunt replied, jerking her thumb toward the back of the RV. “I hitched her to the back.”

Someone behind us honked, and my great-aunt stuck her spiky orange head out the window. “Hey!” she boomed. “Cut me some slack! Senior citizen here!”

I fished around under the table for my backpack, unzipped its outside pocket, and grabbed my cell phone. I didn’t care if he was sleeping—A.J. needed to know about this. We were in serious trouble here.

Woke up in Las Vegas! I texted.

Waaaaaaaa? he texted back a moment later.

Occupationally challenged FG. I added a frowny face.

Maybe we should chip in and get her a new wand.

Ha, ha, I texted back. She doesn’t use one. Just a map from AAA. How far away from Portland are we, anyway?

Lemme check. There was a short pause, and then: A thousand miles. You have to be at the zoo in six hours. You’ll never make it!

“We’re a thousand miles from Portland,” I announced, flipping the cell phone shut and returning it to the pocket of my backpack. “We have to be at the zoo in six hours. We’ll never make it.”

“That’s the spirit!” said Great-Aunt Aby sarcastically. “Where’s your sense of adventure, Catriona?”

“Adventure!” I cried, my voice rising along with the toad count. “The clock is ticking! Have you forgotten about Geoffrey?” I wondered if I should call NASA again and get them to patch me through to my mother. But what could she do besides yell at Great-Aunt Aby from outer space?

“How could anyone forget the G-Man?” my great-aunt replied. “Charming boy.” She glanced back over her shoulder again and gave me a stern look. “Now, clean up those toads and let me drive.”

As the RV lurched down the Las Vegas Strip—the backfiring was coming from us, I soon realized—Olivia and Pearl rushed to the big picture window in the living-room area to gawk at the sights. I unzipped my sleeping bag in a fury, climbed out, and began tracking down my latest crop of toads. If anything happens to my little brother because of Great-Aunt Aby’s bungling, I thought, stuffing them in my backpack because the trash was full, I’ll … I’ll … I sat back on my heels. Just exactly what would I do? What could I do, after all? I was just a twelve-year-old toad spitter, when it came right down to it.

The thought was sobering. Not only was I just a toad spitter, but I was a toad spitter stuck in the middle of the desert with a waitress named Pearl, an incompetent fairy godmother, and a stepsister who was on Area 51’s most-wanted list. Plus one enormous cat. I glanced at Archibald, who was regarding me with his unblinking green eyes.

The odds of this being a successful rescue attempt were not good.

“Look!” cried Olivia. “Gondolas!”

A diamond clinked against the window as we lurched to a stop outside a hotel that looked like it belonged someplace in Italy. The RV backfired again, and I wondered gloomily if I should add “engine trouble” to our long list of handicaps.

I looked over at Olivia as Great-Aunt Aby consulted her map for the umpteenth time. My stepsister was still gaping out the window. She was actually enjoying this! Lamebrain.

Struck by a wild idea, I reached down and picked up the diamond on the floor by the window, then slipped it into the pocket of my jeans. What if I were to make a dash for the airport? Surely someone would fly me to Portland in exchange for something as valuable as this. I could easily get to the zoo in time if they did, and surely I could dig up a blond wig and pass for Olivia. At least one of us would have a chance at rescuing Geoffrey that way.

Time to improvise! As soon as this thought flashed through my head, there was a sharp movement from the driver’s seat. I turned to see Great-Aunt Aby adjusting the rearview mirror. Maybe she really can read my thoughts, I thought as I caught a glimpse of her magnified eyes staring at me.

Before she or anyone else could stop me, I grabbed my backpack, opened the side door of the RV, and sprinted into the night.