IN THE EN suite washroom attached to her office, Emily turned on the cold tap, cupped water in her hands and washed her face. She was calm now and beginning to realize that her reaction to Fearon’s unscheduled visit had been over the top. She’d worked in a prison long enough to have taken it in her stride, not made such a drama out of it. It was a situation she’d rather not repeat, that much was true, but she was angry with herself. Thanks to Stamp, she’d immediately jumped to the conclusion that she was in danger. Consequently, that was the only thing on her mind the whole time the inmate was standing near her.
It was bloody ridiculous.
Emily was still looking in the mirror as the sound of running footsteps echoed in the corridor outside.
Stamp appeared in the doorway, sheet-white and out of breath.
‘He didn’t touch you?’
Emily dried her face on a towel.
‘Did he?’
‘No, he didn’t.’
‘Come here.’ Stamp opened his arms for a hug.
Emily’s feet remained rooted to the spot. ‘Don’t fuss, it was just one of those things.’
‘It was a fuck-up that could have cost you d—’
‘Drop it, Martin!’ She was angry now. ‘It was no one’s fault. Ash is doing his best with limited staff today. A fight distracted them. Fearon was only missing for a few minutes. It was no big deal.’
‘What the f—’
‘Keep your voice down!’
Stamp moved towards her but Emily stepped away.
She wanted him to go and told him so. ‘I’ve got a lot to do and so I imagine have you.’
He didn’t move. ‘I’m just looking out for you, Em.’
‘I know that.’ She let out a big sigh. ‘I’m not trying to push you away but I’d appreciate some space. Just back off a bit, give me time to settle in. Can you do that for me?’
‘If that’s what you want,’ Stamp said caustically, his frustration bubbling to the surface.
Emily softened. He was like a big kid sometimes, wanting to play the knight on the white horse, stamping his feet because she wouldn’t let him. She pulled a funny face, frowning like a clown, making light of the situation, trying to get him onside. It had always worked when she was married. Robert could never stay cross with her for long. He would burst out laughing and within minutes they would be friends again, unable to recall what had made them angry in the first place.
Stamp was having none of it.
Sitting down, he glared at her like a spoilt child. They were now engaged in a game of blink first.
She threw him a crumb. ‘Will you go if I promise to holler when I need you?’
He said nothing but the ice began to melt.
‘Hey, don’t let’s fight. Finding my way again was always going to take time, Martin. We both knew that. It’s been a tough couple of days. To be honest with you, I’m struggling to remember who the hell I am right now. Please tell me you understand. If you don’t, I’ll be cross for the rest of the day, tomorrow and possibly even the day after.’ She managed a grin. ‘Rachel’s not the only one in my family who knows how to sulk.’
He raised his hands in a gesture of surrender.
Emily smiled warmly. ‘There is one thing you could do for me . . .’
‘Name it.’
‘I’m concerned about Rachel. She’s still not coping and I’m too close to be objective. I know she’s difficult and, let’s face it, not your greatest fan, but will you talk to her?’
‘I thought you wanted me to butt out of your life.’
‘Don’t be like that.’ Emily put on her begging face.
‘I can’t see the point,’ Stamp said. ‘She flew off on me last time, practically accused me of seducing you. If I remember correctly, she made her feelings crystal clear. I’m no bereavement counsellor, Em. That isn’t my forte. So I’d rather not, if it’s all the same to you. Why don’t you ask Jo?’
‘I would, but she has issues of her own right now.’
Stamp made a face. ‘Jo’s second name is Issues.’
It was obvious to Emily that there had been a falling out between her colleagues, but she was too wired to indulge in speculation. Besides, she had a rough idea it involved her and she didn’t want to get into that.
She tried again. ‘You’ve been around Rachel a lot since Robert died. I did think about asking Jo, but I thought a male might connect with her better. I know it’s a lot to ask after all I said but she really needs help. I’m just not getting through. She’s hiding things from me, Martin. Every time I tackle her, she storms off. I’m at my wits’ end. We may be flesh and blood but I have no idea what she wants.’
‘Can you bring Robert back?’
‘Don’t be spiteful.’ Emily glared at him.
‘I’ll think about it.’ He got to his feet. ‘That’s the best I can do.’
Emily watched as he walked away without a backward glance.