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Maeve dropped her father off at the house, passed on the hot chocolate, then left again almost immediately. She couldn’t seem to get her dad’s words out of her head and the implication behind them.
He’s not going to be around.
He’s going to die.
And all he wants is to spend time with those he loves.
This time her feet took her toward the boardwalk and she sat down on a bench. Only a few days ago she had been nearby, crashing her head against a surfboard in a weird attempt to live life at its fullest.
Leaning forward, elbows on her knees, Maeve shook her head at her stupidity. How had she ever thought that surfing was going to be the key to it all? Why had she settled on that moment in time over another?
Because it was something you were afraid of.
“Hey, Maeve!”
Maeve jerked her head up. “Oh, hi Riley.” This was the problem with living in a small town. No place was safe. No matter where a person went, they ran into someone they knew. In this case, Riley had obviously decided the boardwalk was the perfect place to walk the dogs for the afternoon, since she had at least six leashes in her hands.
The dogs yipped and barked, a couple of them coming over to get in Maeve’s face for a hello. Smiling a little, Maeve tried to pet each of them, but the wriggling mass made it difficult.
“Ignore them,” Riley said. “They’re all a bunch of needy animals.”
Maeve’s laughter grew. “At least they go after what they want,” she said without thinking of the underlying meaning in those words.
“As opposed to people?” Riley offered.
Maeve stiffened. “Does everybody know?”
Riley shrugged, adjusting the leashes as the dogs tugged at her. “Probably. I mean, Gavin was there, your sister’s cake shop is the hot spot in town and everybody knows everybody. How could they not?”
Maeve groaned and let her head fall back. “What am I supposed to do, Ri? It’s all such a mess.”
“First, you can stand up and take half of these dogs. They’re driving me crazy.”
Reluctantly, Maeve stood up and helped. She really wasn’t in the mood for it, but what was she supposed to say?
“Now we walk,” Riley continued.
There was silence for several minutes between the two women and Maeve thought maybe the subject wouldn’t come up again, something which made her feel equal parts grateful and frustrated. She really had no idea what to do. Her family said forgive him, her heart said take him back, but her mind said he had his chance. How many chances were too many? Yes, they all made mistakes, but were all mistakes created equal? Weren’t his fairly big ones?
“The real question is...what do you want to do?” Riley offered, as if she’d been reading Maeve’s thoughts.
Maeve glanced over at her friend. “What if what I want and what’s right are two different things?”
Riley shrugged. “Are they?”
Maeve thought about it. “I don’t know,” she answered honestly. “I’m torn between a couple of...emotions? Ideas? Principles?”
Riley nodded. “Sounds hard.”
Maeve snorted. “You could say that.”
“But seriously...forget what everyone else has said,” Riley pressed. “Forget what you think is right or what you think your Sunday School teacher would say. What do you want? Like, deep in your heart. What do you want?”
It took Maeve longer this time. Riley was trying to help her without simply telling her to take Ethan back, which Maeve appreciated. And since Maeve couldn’t seem to find her footing on her own, she found herself wanting to follow through. She thought of her emotional struggles, of Ethan’s excuses, of her father’s lesson. What did she want? Deep down in the very depths of her soul?
“I want Ethan,” she whispered hoarsely.
“Well, then,” Riley said breezily, as if it were no big deal. “Go get him.”
Maeve chuckled darkly. “It’s not that easy. I can’t just...I mean...even if I can forgive him, I said some horrible things. He’ll never take me back.”
“Maybe he feels the same way.”
“And maybe he doesn’t.”
“There’s only one way to find out,” Riley continued.
Maeve rolled her eyes. “Riley, you know I love you, but it’s easy to tell me to go get him back when it’s not your heart involved.”
Riley smiled. “I know. But how much worse can it hurt than it does now? If he says no, you’re not out anything but your time. If he says yes, then...well...” Riley shrugged. “All’s well that ends well.”
Maeve contemplated that. It was true. She was already hurting. Would it really hurt worse to have him turn her down? That little voice in the back of her head that had guided her for the last eight years had a very eager answer.
Yes.
“I...I think I’m afraid,” Maeve whispered.
Riley stopped, tugging on the dogs to do the same. When Maeve stopped as well, Riley stepped forward and wrapped her arms around Maeve. “Fear is a cold bedfellow,” Riley whispered in Maeve’s ear. “Don’t let it win.”
With one arm stretched out against the leashes, Maeve gripped her friend in the other. Riley was tall and thin, a direct contrast to Maeve’s own short build, but the willowy woman felt strong and solid. Her hug was exactly what Maeve needed and her words were even better.
For the second time in her life, she began to feel a determination to overcome her fears. She’d done it once before. Back when she threw away her glasses and planned a life list. But this was different. Maeve didn’t want to stay in the shadows being safe anymore, but she also didn’t need a list.
She needed her people.
She needed her dad’s advice. She needed her mother’s baking. She needed Aspen’s cakes. She needed Estelle’s blunt scoldings. She needed her friends’ support. But most importantly, she needed Ethan. She needed his kisses and his touch and the opportunity to learn together what they needed as a couple. He didn’t know how much she needed his time. She hadn’t known how much he needed his business.
They had so much to learn and it would never happen if she kept running when things got hard.
Maeve pulled back and sniffed. Her mind felt much lighter and her direction more clear. She wasn’t sure how she was going to get Ethan to forgive her, but there had to be a way. “Thanks,” she said to Riley. “I think I needed that.”
Riley grinned. “Are you ready to get your man back?”
Maeve nodded.
“Then let’s drop the pooches off and meet at the shop. Sugar always does wonders for my brainstorming.”
Maeve laughed softly. “Sounds like a plan.”
*****
ETHAN SAT IN HIS CHAIR as Michael left, his mind churning over everything his friend had shared. Maeve was still upset. Michael had said she was miserable.
Tox came over, sniffing at the chair, and Ethan absentmindedly picked up the dog, setting him in his lap and scratching behind the pup’s ears.
“She’s miserable, Tox,” Ethan muttered. “By all accounts, I should be happy she’s having a hard time. So why does it make me feel worse?”
He didn’t like the idea of Maeve hurting. Logically, he’d known she had been physically hurt. But she’d been so angry that Ethan hadn’t truly considered that their breakup would leave her feeling bad. After all, it was Maeve who initiated it. Didn’t that mean she’d be relieved? Or grateful, even, to be rid of him?
Tox settled into a ball of fluff and began to snore, causing Ethan to smile. It was funny how everything in his life, the dog included, came back to Maeve. The design on the board. The puppy’s name. Ethan had done a wonderful job of surrounding himself with all things Maeve.
“Dude!”
Ethan’s head jerked toward the door. Tox barked, the sound having woken him up. “Back here, Jayden.”
The sound of flip flops against the wood floors could be heard getting closer as Jayden came to the back. He poked his head inside. “Hiding?”
Ethan chuckled. “I just narrowly avoided getting beat up by your cousin. What makes you think I was hiding?”
Jayden grinned and pounded one fist against the other. “Ready for round two?”
“Bring it on.”
Jayden chuckled as he walked to seat and plopped down. “So I guess I don’t have to give you any kind of a lecture about hurting my family, then, huh? Michael did it for me?”
“How did you know it was Michael?”
“Lucky guess.”
Ethan shook his head. “You can deliver the speech if you want. Michael didn’t give me much of one. Mostly he listened to me bawl my guts out like a baby.”
Jayden rubbed his chin. “Yeah...he has this weird ability to listen. I have no idea what that’s like.”
Ethan smiled, but didn’t respond.
“So...what are you going to do to win my other cousin back?”
Ethan’s eyebrows went up. “You want me to get her back?”
“Don’t you want to?” Jayden asked. “I would think this whole brooding routine is a clear sign that you want her.”
“I’m not brooding.”
“Man, you are so brooding.”
Ethan scowled and Jayden pointed at his face.
“See? Point made.”
Ethan rolled his eyes. “Not. Brooding.”
Jayden put up his hands. “Fine. Call it what you want. But it still looks to me like you want her back.” He leaned forward. “Funny thing is though, I’m wondering why none of us ever saw you two together. The family grapevine said you were dating, but not once have I seen you two around.”
Ethan’s eyes dropped to his suddenly very fascinating desk. “Yeah, well...”
“Oh, this oughta be good.”
Ethan gave Jayden a severe look. “You’re right. Michael was better at listening.”
Jayden grinned unrepentantly. “But I’m better at problem solving.”
“And what problem are we solving?”
“Dude, you’re thick in the head or something.” Jayden opened his eyes wide. “How. To. Get. Her. Back.”
Ethan slumped in his seat. “She won’t take me, Jay. I’ve let her down twice now.”
He shrugged, not the least bit concerned. “I’ve let her down more than that and she still loves me, so it stands to reason she loves you too.”
Ethan snorted. “If only it were that easy.”
“Do you love her?”
Ethan nodded.
“Is your business more important to you than her?”
Ethan wanted to be offended at the accusation, but he knew where the question was coming from, so he chose to shake his head. “You know me better than that.”
“I know that you’ve wanted this business since we were kids, but you didn’t see Maeve as a viable girlfriend until we were teenagers,” Jayden said in an uncharacteristically serious tone. “Since Tone isn’t here, I’ll ask again. Is your business more important?”
“I was sacrificing our time to save my business so that I could propose to her and have something worthwhile behind me,” Ethan said in a steely tone. “I was never trying to put it first. I was trying to secure our future.”
Jayden relaxed and nodded. “I had hoped it was something like that, but no one was really sure.”
“That’s because you’re all on Mae’s side,” Ethan muttered.
“Wrong!” Jayden shouted, causing Tox to bark again. “From what I understand, her whole family is rooting for her to quit being an idiot and take you back.”
“She’s not an idiot,” Ethan shot back. “I hurt her. She has every right to be upset.”
“And now you’re going to apologize and we’ll get that wedding back on track.”
Ethan pushed a hand through his hair, then set Tox on the ground. “She thinks she can’t trust me.”
“So show her she can.”
“How?”
Jayden pursed his lips and tilted his head. “Good question.” He slapped his knees. “This might require a little food for thought.” Standing, he made his way to the door before pausing. “Coming?”
Ethan was so confused. Jayden seemed to jump around in his thoughts without worrying about the fact that everyone else couldn’t follow. “Where’re we going?”
“The cake shop,” he replied. “I need food if I’m going to have to think this hard.” He winked. “Don’t they say the way to a man’s heart is through his stomach?”
“I’m not trying to win your heart,” Ethan muttered, shoving Jayden playfully.
“Good thing.” Jayden shivered dramatically. “You’re so not my type. I don’t go for brooders.” Laughing, he raced through the shop, making sure to stay out of Ethan’s reach. “Come on. I think Aspen has a new flavor this week.”
“Aspen always has a new flavor.”
“Which is why we should go there more often.”
Ethan shook his head, but he was smiling. Jayden was a good guy, and Ethan appreciated the help, but he seriously had his doubts about whether or not there was any hope of getting Maeve back. It had taken her eight years last time to forgive him. Could he wait another eight?
He scooped up Tox and locked up the shop. He didn’t have the answer to his questions, but sitting around...brooding...wasn’t helping either. At least he’d get a good slice of cake out of the trip, even if the one thing he really wanted was out of reach.