Chapter 9

CRAWLEY LIT THE CANDLE WITH THE TAPER, her tawny complexion momentarily lightened by the flickering flame. Folding her hands, she offered a prayer for her Uncle Trini, missing since the big typhoon last year. She also sent a prayer for Autumn and Steve, not only that they would see the light and accept Jesus Christ (as she always did) but that the latter could find a good job.

Her lips parted in a slight smile. She loved them both in an effortless, soothing kind of way. Crawley had been nerdy in high school, and most of her girlfriends were more or less the children of her parent’s friends. Even amongst people she knew well, she had trouble standing out. At least until she hit the age of nineteen and her body bloomed at last.

Then, she had received plenty of attention from men, while many women shunned her or seemed petty. At first, she had been thrilled with the reversal, but quickly she learned that just because someone said kind things did not mean their heart was in it. Certainly, the young men at the university had been willing to say almost anything to get her into bed…

She prayed, asking God for help finding her way. Crawley still wasn’t sure what the future held for her and Phillip. She loved him, and not in a way that was at all effortless or soothing. Rather, she found herself almost overwhelmed by her feelings for him. When Phil said something, he meant it, at least at the moment it was uttered. She was confident that the young man loved her, but she wondered if that love was enough.

Finishing her prayers, she blew out the still smoldering taper and discarded it in the metal urn next to the rows of candles. She nodded pleasantly at an older nun who passed by with a cell phone laid across her open palm. A few of the faithful sat in the pews, silently mouthing their own prayers or just looking up at the image of the cross with a restless, haunted look.

Crawley passed through beams of sunlight as she headed down the aisle toward the exit. She stepped onto the street, cursing when she realized it was drizzling. Having no umbrella, she took a discarded newspaper and used it as a crude shield from the chilly rain.

“This is what I get for not wearing a bra to church,” she said, her thin pink T-T-shirt soon soaked through. She stepped over a rapidly growing puddle and fumbled for her keys. As her hand entered her tight jeans pocket, she noticed a dark smear on the back of her wrist. A greasy streak had been left on her jeans as well, and when the aroma hit her nose she realized why the newspaper had been discarded.

“Oh, this isn’t happening, this isn’t happening, this isn’t happening…”

Gingerly, she discarded the newspaper and checked her hair. It was hard to tell, but she didn’t think her flowing tresses had been soiled. Using her unspoiled hand, she opened the door and hit the trunk release latch. She did the best she could, using a gallon jug of water her father insisted she keep around for emergencies to rinse the filth from her clothing and hand.

The thought of driving all the way back to Queens with soiled garments was not a pleasing one. A sudden flash of insight occurred to her. Autumn’s tattoo parlor was close by, and the woman may have something she could wear. If nothing else, she could use the bathroom to better clean herself.

Crawley bought a newspaper from a nearby metal vending unit and tried to keep it relatively dry as she made her way back to her Eclipse. She used the newspaper to cover the seat, then slid inside. Moaning at the sight of her hair, she gasped when she realized a male pedestrian was staring into her window. He smiled and glanced down at her chest.

Blushing, she grabbed the remains of the newspaper and covered her prominent nipples. The man laughed and went on his way.

“Pervert,” she hissed at his back.

Crawley put the keys in the ignition and started the engine. It was a short drive to the tattoo parlor, the name long worn off the battered sign out front. She spotted Autumn’s dark head of hair bobbing to some unheard music as she sketched on a drawing pad.

Under the awning, she was no longer being peppered with cold rain drops, so Crawley took a moment to wring as much of the water from her hair as she could. The buzzer that went off when she opened the door had Autumn glancing up. A slow, confused smile spread over her face.

“Crawley?” She eyed the woman. “You look like you zigged where you should have zagged…and what is that smell?”

“Don’t ask.” She lifted her hand to display the dark brown stain on her blue jeans.

“Oh, baby…c’mon, I’ll save you. I’m sure one of Sal’s girlfriend’s things will fit you.”

“Sal has a girlfriend?”

“Don’t sound so surprised.” Autumn led her past the application room and up a flight of stairs. “His legs don’t work, but his other parts work just fine.”

Crawley blushed as she followed Autumn’s leather clad derriere.

“I love your pants,” Crawley said, both because she did find them flattering and to change the subject.

“Thanks. What with all the humidity, it was a bitch getting them on. Steve gave me a hand, but to be honest that man is a lot better at getting clothes off of me, heh heh.”

Crawley smiled, but felt a pang of jealousy. Autumn and Steve’s passion for one another never seemed to cool. Autumn had once told her that differences made good sparks, and she and Steve were different enough in the right ways.

Are Phillip and I too much alike, or too different? Just right? She wondered to herself as they reached the top of the steps. Autumn opened a door to a small efficiency apartment. She rummaged around the deployed fold away bed until she found an empty shopping bag.

“Here, throw your jeans in there. Sal and his old lady are gonna be out for hours.”

“Okay.” Crawley unbuttoned her soiled denim trousers. She peeled them from her shapely legs, straining not to touch any of the brown remnants of her fecal encounter. Autumn whistled.

“Looking good,” she said when Crawley glanced up at her. “I like the little birds on your thong.”

“It’s a g-string.” Crawley turned about to show off her finely shaped derriere. “And those are little butterflies.”

“Really?” Autumn said, though she didn’t seem that interested. Instead, she was rummaging inside of a narrow closet just off the main room. She withdrew a flannel shirt, sniffing it carefully. Nodding to herself, she tossed it to Crawley.

“Here, turkey’s done, and all that.”

Crawley glanced down at her erect nipples and blushed.

“Oh.” She took off her shirt and wrung it out, revealing her small but firm bust to the other woman. A sudden, sly thought occurred to her and she glanced up at Autumn.

“Say, you have a pierced nipple, right?”

“What?” Autumn said, nearly dropping the sweat pants she held in her hand. “That’s a weird…where did you hear that?”

“Phil told me.” Crawley blushed as she realized the chain of information.

“Steve told him? I don’t care, I guess. Yeah, I have both of them done, actually. Why? Not turning lezzie on me are you?”

Crawley’s jaw nearly hit the floor.

“You’re not, actually, are you?” Autumn said. “Oh, my god, I am so sorry—”

“No! I’m not coming out to you, if that’s what you mean.”

“Okay, ’cause it’s cool if you are! I mean, I have to admit, I’ve always kind of wondered about you. I could have sworn that you were checking me out a couple of times…”

“Uhm,” Crawley said, blinking.

“I’m kidding!” Autumn threw the sweats to her. “Here, these are clean. God, you’re almost as much fun to mess with as Steve.”

“I am a little bit…sheltered.” Crawley slipped on the sweats. “I was actually asking because I was thinking of getting mine pierced.”

“No shit?” Autumn was smiling broadly. “Well, I can give you my employee discount. I can even do the deed, if you like.”

“Wouldn’t that be weird for you?”

“No, not really. Besides, it’s too late to get modest, you already flashed your tits and panties at me.”

Both women laughed. Crawley felt the tension draining from her shoulders, stress she hadn’t even realized was there. She thought that Autumn felt obligated to be her friend due to her financial intervention months earlier. For the first time, though, she seemed to be actually enjoying Crawley’s company.

“So, how are you and Steve doing?” Crawley didn’t want to ask, and as Autumn stiffened she figured it had been a mistake. A moment later, Autumn sighed and dropped her gaze to the folded shirt in her hands.

“Good, I guess.”

“You guess? What does that mean?”

“It means that we’re together, and we’re…happy,” Autumn’s brown eyes seemed haunted. “He can’t get over me leaving him, though.”

“So? Tell him to man up, you’re together now.”

“It’s not that simple. I think he’s afraid that I’m going to do it again.”

“Oh.” Crawley wrinkled her nose. Figuring out how to keep venom from degrading during shipment? That was easy. Figuring out how to fix a fractured relationship was more daunting by far. “So…are you? I mean, do you think it will come to that?”

“No!” Autumn’s hands twisted the shirt in her hands. “I mean, I don’t want to, but…sooner or later I rub everyone the wrong way, y’know? How long is Steve, is anyone going to put up with my bullshit?”

“Don’t sell yourself short,” Crawley smiled, glad Autumn was confiding in her at last. “You’re a catch, Autumn Winters.”

“I’m a catch, huh?” Autumn’s shoulders straightened a bit, and her eyes lit up.

“Oh yeah, if I was a dude I’d totally get witch ya,” Crawley adopted a hip hop pose.

“Gawd, that’s terrible,” Autumn said.

“I tried to make it funny so you wouldn’t think I was coming on to you.”

“You mean, you weren’t?” Autumn pouted. “I’m getting some mixed signals here, Miss Crawley. First you flash your tits at me and now you’re all being a prude.”

They both laughed, though Autumn stopped first.

“You should be careful,” she said, “this is where those women went wrong with Kobe and Tyson.”

“That’s not funny!”

“Then why are you laughing?”

“What’s that noise?” Crawley tilted her head to the side as she finished tying her sneakers.

“That’s my cell phone,” Autumn said, her brows scrunching low over her eyes. “Oh, right, I’m supposed to go pick up Steve at four. FUCK!”

“What’s wrong?” Crawley followed Autumn as she dashed down the stairs to the parlor.

“Sal won’t be back for a while, and when he said he was going to a movie I forgot about Steve needing a ride. He’s gonna walk from the gym so he can pick up his last check at Greece Hut. Fucking stupid!”

“I could pick him up. I mean, it’s the least I can do since you saved me from being covered in poop.”

“You don’t mind?” Autumn had cautious optimism growing on her face.

“Not at all. I could pick up dinner for my folks.”

“From Greece Hut?” Autumn looked at her aghast. “You want them to disown you?”

Soon Crawley was hustling out the door, setting her phone’s GPS for the Greece Hut.

Steve had not bothered to check the message on his phone, figuring that Autumn was just running late. He was busy communicating via social media with General Rexxun. The man was as old as Steve’s father, but had adapted to the mobile device age far better. His wrestling school, The Monster Maker, had a nifty website with numerous links that were easy to navigate. The General had been blowing up Steve’s phone with messages ever since Deathslayer had called in his favor. Indeed, the trainer seemed even more excited about Steve’s foray into pro wrestling than his father.

Gonna put you in the advanced class read one of the messages from General.

Are you sure? Replied Steve. It’s been awhile. Ten years.

You’ll do fine. Like riding a bike. :)

Steve glanced up from his phone, noticing a white Eclipse had stopped in front of him. He was sitting on a bench outside Greece Hut, unwilling to remain within its confines for longer than necessary to retrieve his final paycheck. He squinted his blue eyes and recognized the driver.

“Crawley?” he said, walking over to the open passenger window. “Going to eat here? I don’t advise it.”

“I’m here to pick you up. Didn’t Autumn get a hold of you? She’s stuck at work.”

“I, uh, I didn’t notice she left a message.”

He crammed his phone back into his pocket and opened the door. The Eclipse had a small profile, and he had some difficulty folding his long legs so they would fit. He had to sit with his knees bent nearly double.

Crawley giggled at his struggles.

“Sorry, it’s a small car.”

“Curse of being big. I can only imagine what guys like Andre must have gone through. I’m only six foot six!”

“Andre?”

“Sorry. Andre the Giant. I’m so used to Autumn knowing all the wrestling related crap I guess I take it for granted.”

Steve, very discreetly (he hoped), ran his eyes over Crawley’s form. Even though she was dressed down more than he was used to seeing, her baggy clothing could not conceal the sweet, sleek curves of her slender body. He really liked her hair, the way it was so long and luxuriant. Thoughts of running his fingers through it were quickly banished by intense guilt. Of course, he would never cheat on Autumn. He could not delude himself into thinking he was the perfect man, but Steve had never cheated on any woman before, and did not intend to start now. No matter how tempting thoughts of Crawley’s body writhing under his own may have been…

He realized that he had been staring, tried to come up with an excuse. Crawley came unexpectedly to his rescue.

“You’re staring at my ‘give up on life pants,’ aren’t you?”

“I’m not gonna judge. I’m in ratty gym gear myself.”

Crawley pulled the car around the drive-through. Steve groaned and slapped a hand over his face.

“You’re going to eat here, aren’t you? Haven’t you been paying attention?”

“What’s wrong with Greece Hut? My dad likes the Big Zeus, and my mom likes the Harvest Salad.”

“The Harvest salad is pretty good…used to be called the Demeter Salad, but people didn’t know who she was.”

“Demeter? Greek goddess of agriculture, right?”

“Yeah, that’s right. Do you read mythology?”

“When I was in school.”

“Oh, that’s right, I forget that you actually went to college, unlike most of my friends.”

They paused their conversation while Crawley rattled off an order. After she had pulled forward and paid, Tenisha peered out the window at Steve.

“I thought you quit,” Tenisha said.

“One of my finer moments,” Steve replied.

“Do Autumn know your ass in the car with another chick?” the little woman said, her eyes narrowing suspiciously.

“Autumn sent her!” Steve said, blushing more than usual because of his own guilty conscience. “I am innocent of all charges!”

“Whatever, have fun!”

After getting her order, Crawley pulled the car out into traffic. Steve stared out his window, but could feel her eyes upon him. When he turned back toward her, her gaze would snap back to the road. He felt as if, cliché as it sounded, he could cut the tension in the air with a knife.

“How’s it going with you and Phil?” he said to break the silence, then realized it might be interpreted as fishing to see if she was available. He was almost grateful when Crawley appeared to consider the question on its own merits.

“Well, good, I guess. I mean, he keeps checking out other chicks when he thinks I’m not looking, but…”

“Is that all?” Steve laughed. “Most of us do it, it’s just that Phil isn’t good at being subtle.”

“He’s honest and sweet,” Crawley said a bit defensively.

“I didn’t mean it as an insult,” Steve said quickly.

“No, it’s all right.” Crawley grinned. “I think I was talking to myself more than you. The thing is Phil and I are great together.”

“I’m a believer,” Steve said, holding up his hands. “You’ve helped him come out of his shell, be a bit more confident.”

“That might be the problem. He knows he has game now, and he might be willing to play the field.”

Steve glanced over at her sharply, sensing the pain edging her voice.

“I’m not so sure about that. You know about Phil’s peanut butter and jelly thing, right?”

From Crawley’s horrified expression, Steve figured she was thinking of abjectly sexual applications. “NO! Not that way, I mean, he really loves PB&J. Took it for lunch to school for all twelve years of compulsory ed.”

“Really? I hadn’t noticed.”

“Oh, yeah, that guy’s got an addiction. He was always wanting to go to Denver and order a Fool’s Gold PB&J that had bacon bits mixed in.”

“Wow, that’s a heart attack on a plate!”

“Elvis ate twenty-two in one sitting, if the stories are to be believed.”

“No wonder he shit himself to death!”

They both laughed, which ended with an awkward silence where they couldn’t look at each other. Crawley had the road to focus on, but he found himself staring at his own rapidly tapping fingers. He tried to forge on.

“Believe it or not, I know where you’re coming from. There’s been a bit of tension between me and Autumn since she came back.”

A quick, sharp glance, the way that Crawley’s hands tightened on the wheel, clued Steve in to the fact that Autumn had been confiding in the petite Asian.

“That’s not cool,” she said nervously. Steve figured he should let her off the hook.

“Have you tried talking to Phil about how you’re feeling?”

“No, I can’t. Every time I bring these things up we end up fighting. It’s just that he’s so sensitive, and takes everything I say so…literally. He’s a great guy, smart, sweet…I just don’t know if he believes in me. In us.”

“As I said, I feel where you’re coming from.”

Steve digested her words as they drove on. He felt as if he should stand up for his friend, but at the same time he didn’t want to give out bad advice to Crawley. The passage of a rain cloud overhead momentarily darkened the interior of the car. The low light combined with his heavy fatigue made his face look severe.

“I didn’t mean to cause you problems.” He glanced over at her. Crawley lips were pursed in a frown.

“It’s not that. I was just thinking. It occurs to me that you’re his first serious girlfriend. I don’t know if I should say it or not…”

Crawley glanced over at him, a mischievous smile on her face.

“That he was a virgin before we slept together?”

“Oh…well, that cat is out of the bag, then. The problem is, he has the same voice that all men have inside his head, telling him to spread his seed far and wide.”

Crawley laughed, a more high pitched sound than Autumn’s husky mirth. It reminded him of how young she seemed, though he was only about five years her senior.

“I’ve learned to accept his wandering eye. I bet all men do the same.”

“You better believe it. We can’t help it, most of the time we don’t even know we’re doing it! Autumn caught me looking at a waitress last week, and I had to pretend I was offended by her short shorts.”

“Did it work?”

“Not a bit. Fortunately, Autumn’s not the jealous type. Wish I could say the same.”

“Oh,” Crawley said, just a hint of optimism in her tone, “has she given you reason to be jealous?”

“No, except for working for her ex and all. I mean, I haven’t noticed any hickeys or monkey bites—that I haven’t put there myself.”

Crawley laughed, but she felt a rush run through her body at his words. Steve seemed very manly when compared to Phil, but also somehow sweeter. Maybe it was the years he had spent teaching kindergarten, but he just came off as someone you could, and should, trust.

“Autumn’s a lucky girl,” Crawley said.

“Nah, I’m a lucky guy.”

The Eclipse pulled up outside of Steve’s building. The old brownstone had seen better days, half of the windows were covered with blue tarp for repairs. A loud, dissonant ruckus could be heard as the construction crew busied themselves with their work. Steve pried himself out of the small front seat and turned about to face her.

“Thanks for the ride…and for saving Autumn, in case you’ve forgotten.”

“How could I when you bring it up every time you see me?” Crawley said, though she did grin. “I was just doing what Christ wanted me to.”

“Well, tell that Jew Carpenter that I said thanks too.”

“Will do!”

“Thanks,” he mumbled again, hastily exiting the car. It lurched forward almost as soon as the door shut tight.

Steve watched and waved as she pulled away, the Eclipse rushing into the afternoon sun.

“Man,” he said, thoughts of her slender form pressed against his hard to dismiss. “Man!”

He ran up the stairs to their apartment, opening the door and shutting it behind him as if he could evade his traitorous mind with simple physical barriers. The painting Autumn had done helped to focus his mind. She had finished the work, and Steve was honestly impressed with her artistic skill. He was a little put off by the disembodied lion mouth eating New York, but he had to admit that it was skillfully rendered.

“I love her,” he said, seeming to be surprised by his own voice.

“I love her!” he said with great conviction, and a smile spread on his face. He did love her, with every ounce of his heart. He just wished he could put the nagging doubts traipsing about his subconscious to rest. Had she only agreed to marry him because she thought she was dying? Were they living on borrowed time, whether because Autumn would get bored with him or her health suddenly declined? Would this new direction their lives were about to take bring them closer together or smash them apart?

Dismissing such thoughts as much as he could, he went to the fridge and rummaged inside, trying to come up with something for dinner. He had some pork steaks he’d defrosted a day ago and had done nothing with. Selecting garlic salt and Cajun seasoning, he spiced up the meat before wrapping it in foil and sticking it in the oven. Some frozen broccoli and half a wedge of Velveeta became toppings for the baked potatoes that soon joined the pork steaks in the oven. When he opened a can of sliced peaches, he was feeling like it was almost going to be a real dinner.

The door slammed, and he smiled at the sound of Autumn bitching about the construction workers taking up all the parking spaces. Her heavy boots with the platform soles were hardly quiet as she walked up behind him.

“Hey, sugar.” She slipped her arms around his waist and put her head on his shoulder. “Sorry about leaving you stranded.”

He put his free hand atop one of hers, and their fingers wove together.

“Don’t stress about it, beautiful. Crawley didn’t seem to mind.”

“She shouldn’t.” Autumn kissed him on the back of the neck, though she had to stand on her tip toes to do so. “Her family actually likes eating Greece Hut.”

“I prefer real food.”

“I know,” Autumn said, disengaging from him and opening the oven. “It smells great!”

“Home cooking is something we’re going to miss. When we’re on the road, I mean.”

“Living out of a suitcase pretty much describes my life before we met.”

“We’ll have to book all our own hotel rooms. Unlike most professional sports, wrestling federations don’t make travel arrangements for you.”

“I have apps on my phone for that. It’ll be fine.”

“We’re going to have to put up with a lot of crap, too. I’m a legacy, and all the boys who’ve been busting their asses to get noticed will be resentful.”

“I’m used to mean people.”

“Autumn,” Steve said with a sigh, leaving his broccoli to sit for a moment, “I’m serious! This is not going to be an easy life!”

“So?” Autumn said, jabbing a fork into the pot of cheesy broccoli. “Easy things aren’t worth doing, isn’t that what you used to tell your kids?”

“I was trying to teach them to print.”

“But it still applies, right?” she said, popping a golden-green morsel in her mouth.

“I guess so.” Steve stirred the broccoli half-heartedly. Autumn seemed quite excited for life on the road, but what if it wasn’t to her liking? Then she’d be here at home while he was away for months on end, bored and lonely…

“Steve, you’re still with me right? Kind of spaced out there for a second.”

“Right,” he said, slapping a lid on the pot when she went after seconds.

“Hey!”

“Wait for the potatoes to get done,” he said, wagging a finger before her face.