Chapter Thirteen

Carolina and Stede strolled along the streets of Amarillo, going in and out of the shops downtown. Stede sat patiently in one dress shop, while she tried on several outfits.

“I need to buy something to wear in Dallas. You’re going to have to nod when you see something that will be perfect if we go out in the evening. Remember, I only had one suitcase full of business clothes when I arrived for what was supposed to be a three-day trip and I have to put a wardrobe together.”

With a smile, Stede nodded and after a few words with the saleslady, he sat down and enjoyed the fashion show. She brought Carolina exactly what he had ordered—casual dressy, a little sexy to show off her figure and legs, the saleslady told her, but nothing flashy.

Carolina selected only the outfits that brought a big smile to Stede’s lips—an evening dress, a day outfit plus a pair of black gaucho pants and a pair of white Capri pants with dressy tops to match.

When she was finished shopping and came out of the dressing room, she found, much to her surprise and somewhat an embarrassment that he had already paid for her purchases. A rodeo outfit was one thing; a supplemental wardrobe was quite another, given the fact that she wasn’t his wife.

When they were out of the store, she said, “What do you think that saleslady thinks of me because you paid for my clothes?”

“I hope she let her mind run wild…”

“Stede!”

“Okay, I told her we were getting married soon. She doesn’t think you’re a kept woman.”

Carolina shook her head. “You’re hopeless! And, I am going to write you a check when we get back to the campgrounds.”

“Fine, but I don’t have to cash it.”

“You have to stop paying for everything.”

“All right, I promise. Ready for lunch?”

“Yes.”

“Good, you can buy me lunch.”

“You’re impossible. After lunch I have to spend the rest of the afternoon working on the computer, checking my clients’ e-mails and see what’s happening at the office, and check in before the weekend.”

“That’s fine. Let’s eat in the Italian restaurant. Otherwise I’m afraid you’ll be overwhelmed with beef by the time you leave Texas.”

****

Stede stretched out on the sofa in the motor home while Carolina worked at the table, putting her workload in order. She went on the Internet and downloaded some research material to read later when they were in Dallas.

When she finished, Stede called his grandmother and they chatted with her a while, freshened up, and went to the pavilion to wait for the others to arrive for dinner.

Carolina took a deep breath and then exhaled. “What smells so good?”

“Beef!” he said jokingly. “They’re barbequing prime ribs for tonight. Chance said they had reserved a table. He’s invited some of his friends and clients to join us and there will be about twelve of us for dinner.”

****

The pavilion had misters around the perimeter to cool the air and huge fans inside that created a pleasant breeze and made the summer heat more bearable. There was a large dance floor in the middle of the room and a bandstand as well as a jukebox.

“The band should be here soon, and in about half an hour this place will be rocking. Cowboys, vendors and rodeo enthusiasts have been arriving all day.”

She and Stede had no sooner sat at their table, where Jamie and John Charles were already seated, when photographers and more rodeo queens than there were contestants in the Miss World contest invaded the pavilion.

A slight exaggeration, she thought, but there was a rodeo queen, a teenage queen, one from the county, and a Miss Amarillo, all accompanied by their courts, and members of the press.

To a woman, all the queens had long hair and were dressed in bright colored cowgirl hats featuring sequins and feathers and boots to match. Beneath their royal sashes they wore equally elaborately designed western blouses tucked into their form-fitting jeans. Jamie and John, both bachelors, were at once smitten and got up and went to meet the young ladies.

“Watching those two young bucks work their charms should be fun,” Stede whispered in her ear, as he ran his hand across her back and nuzzled her neck. “Thank goodness I brought you and I don’t have to get involved. You smell a little like honeysuckle and jasmine. I’m sorry I have to turn in early tonight, aren’t you?”

She shuddered with the thrill of his touch and lowered her head to her shoulder where he continued kissing her. “No, but I think you’re going to need a cold shower.”

“Don’t you like me to kiss you? Your skin is soft to the touch and I love this dress,” he said, tugging at the bow resting on the nape of her neck.

“Stede, don’t you dare!”

“You won’t admit it, but you’re falling in love with me and I know there’ve been times when we both thought our clothes were an impediment to the closeness we sought.”

“You make it very hard not to think that way, I’ll admit. But I have issues to deal with once we get to Dallas.”

“Your mother and sister?”

She nodded. “That’s part of it…” she started, but Chance, Manny and Jenny and some of the other guests who were joining them interrupted her.

It wasn’t long before the place became crowded and noisy. Women of all ages, some older and looking worse for the wear, some she thought looked desperate to catch a cowboy to marry, and some who didn’t seem to be looking for more than a one-night stand, strutted their bodies adorned in tight jeans and fancy shirts and hats, until they soon outnumbered the men.

When Stede went to help Manny and Chance bring the trays of food to the table, Carolina couldn’t help notice the women swarm around them like bees to honey. Some of the ladies were bold enough to give them kisses; a couple of them even grabbed the men from behind and squeezed their tight rear ends.

She noticed Stede smile and laugh easily, with some of the women who flaunted their favors in front of him. He seemed comfortable enough to make her wonder if he had bedded any of them at one time or another or would if she hadn’t been there.

He was handsome, rich, a veterinarian, and a rodeo champion to boot, so she shouldn’t find the fact that women were drawn to him surprising. He wasn’t married and not even engaged, nor did she have a claim on him. And even if she did, the temptation he must face night after night on the circuit had to be overwhelming and a temptation for most professional men who played sports.

She wondered if he was he strong enough to resist. The possibility that he could still make plans to meet one of them later occupied her thoughts for a brief moment before she erased the thought and the scene from her mind.

When he returned to the table, he stepped over the bench and sat beside her, placing a huge platter of food in front of her.

“Carolina? Are you all right?”

She realized she continued staring at the bevy of beauties and managed a smile. “Yes, daydreaming I guess. Do you expect me to eat all this food?”

“Not to worry, King will gladly finish any leftovers.”

“These ribs are larger than the plate,” she exclaimed. “They remind me of something Fred Flintstone would have for dinner.”

“You’re right—” He laughed. “—but they are the best in all of Texas.”

“Like all the women hanging around you.”

Stede turned sideways, looking her over closely with a big grin spreading across his face. “Are you jealous?”

Carolina sat up straighter, primly busying herself placing her napkin on her lap. “No, of course not, I merely wondered. They all seemed to know you and Chance, at least you acted quite familiar.”

“Maybe, maybe they’re old friends, or perhaps they know a good-looking man when they see one,” he teased.

“Well I noticed some of your old friends certainly know a good-looking pair of buns when they see them,” she quipped lightly, managing to spare him a sweet smile, although there had been no mistaking the pique in her tone and the challenge in her salvo.

Stede had trouble hiding his grin that he knew irritated the hell out of her.

She looked at him, appalled. “What?”

“Carolina Palmer is jealous.”

“I am not,” she denied heatedly.

“Oh!” he said, leaning over to whisper in her ear, “now you’re showing a new side—jealous and angry.”

With a primness that irritated the hell out of him, she moved to put space between them. “Stede Foster, you’re incorrigible.”

“If I wasn’t, I wouldn’t be able to handle a difficult woman like you.”

Her light green eyes rounded on him. “Difficult? Me? I’m not the one getting my buns squeezed by a bunch of hussies.”

What she didn’t add was their doing this in front of a woman he’d told a sales clerk earlier that day that he was going to marry. Not that she believed that for a minute. Nor could she see how that could work, great kisser that he was, when she wanted family and stability and he roamed the countryside after fame and fortune, defying death in the process.

“I should hope not,” he said, moving closer until his leg touched hers beneath the table, reconnecting with her.

Now she wondered who was jealous. She gave him an aside glance. He confused her. She wanted to be wanted her entire life. And, if he could be believed, he wanted her, at least to some degree. What that was exactly, she had no clue.

Truth was she wanted him, too. But if she really got him, she didn’t know what might happen. Would she wake up one morning, a wedding and two children later, like her mother, and find the man she’d married tired of dealing with her peccadilloes who turned on her?

Everyone laughed together and Carolina looked around the table. She noticed they apparently were too hungry to pay her any attention, and kept busy eating, for which she was thankful. Besides the ribs, there was corn on the cob, Texas toast, baked beans and coleslaw and her favorite for dessert, Texas brownies.

When she finished eating, she knew her scent of honeysuckle and jasmine had been replaced with the barbeque sauce that seemed a bit much for the napkin to handle, as she reached for a moist wipe.

The conversations remained light and there were stories told that made everyone laugh, along with a few jokes. Stede handed her a key and Carolina excused herself, wrapped the remainder of her rib and the bone in a napkin and headed to the motor home to wash her hands and face.

She gave King the food, filled his bowl with water and went into the motor home. When she came out, Stede was waiting for her.

“I need to wash up, too,” he said. “Did you enjoy the dinner?”

“Yes. The ribs were delicious, but I’m so full I feel like I should exercise for an hour.”

After he washed up, he said, “Well, come on, we’re going dancin’, that’s exercise.”

She took his hand and he led her back to the pavilion. The dance floor was crowded, not only with dancers but people milling around the stage where the queens were soon to be introduced. The good news was that the large crowd forced everyone to dance closer together.

With her arms around his neck, and his hands riding her hips, they moved as one on the dance floor, dipping and swaying, their gaze locked on each other.

Stede smiled and said, “I like the view of your dress from up here. Being tall has its privileges.”

“I know you think being called incorrigible is a compliment,” she quipped, although the implied intimacy strummed her heartstrings, sending a thrill right down to her toes. She raised her head to assess his level of seriousness and in doing so invited his kiss.

A deep sigh escaped her lips and he bent down and asked, “Did you say something?”

She nodded slightly, stood on her tiptoes and whispered, “When you wrap me in your arms, I feel protected and free from harm. For the first time in my life I actually feel safe when I’m with you.”

Not caring that they were in the middle of the dance floor, he enclosed her even tighter, lifted her slightly off the floor and kissed her until they could no longer breathe. When their lips parted, the couples around them had stood there watching and broke out in applause.

Stede good-naturedly raised a hand in the air and waved, but Carolina wished the floor would open and swallow her whole; her cheeks felt as scorched as her lips.

She tried to bolt but he wouldn’t let her go and they continued dancing, while she buried her face at the base of his neck. They danced until the band took a break and then they headed back to the trailers.

“It’s almost nine o’clock,” he said, “tomorrow morning is the beginning of the rodeo. There will be a parade and Colors and the National Anthem, clowns and kids and balloons.”

Carolina was ready to turn in and she knew he had to rest for the big day. “Thank you for another fun evening,” she said, reaching up to kiss him. “I hope you sleep well.”

Stede smiled. “I doubt I’ll get much sleep,” he said, brushing her lips with a kiss of his own. He waited until she was safe inside and he and King went into his trailer.

She leaned against the inside of the door and shook her head. She wished he didn’t have to leave. She knew she’d have trouble sleeping, too. Her entire body bore the imprint of his and she missed being wrapped in his arms. For all her skepticism regarding a relationship with him, she knew she’d fallen deeply in love and tried not to think about the stark fact that there could be no future for them.

Her mind worked against her feelings of the heart until her insides were in turmoil and the more she attempted to catalogue attributes and pros and cons, and positives and negatives, the lower she felt her self-confidence recede.

More than anything, her family background compared to his frightened her. They’d be in Dallas soon and she fretted about being around his family and having them ask about hers. Pride and shame haunted her all her life and limited the depth of her relationships out of fear of rejection when people found out about her past. What good could possibly come from meeting his parents? Parents who were already disappointed he hadn’t, in their opinion, married the perfect woman they had chosen.

Most of the night she tossed and turned and fought with her past until she finally made the decision to find her mother and sister and come to terms with them, then return to Washington as soon as possible. She fell asleep and left dealing with her feelings for Stede for another time.

****

The next morning came too soon, but Carolina was anxious for the day to begin and the rodeo to be over soon. She wanted to speed up their trip to Dallas and after she faced her mother and sister, she could get back to resuming her life and pursuing her goals and Stede could, too, sweet though this interlude had been.

Every time she looked at him, she was reminded that she’d have to face the fact her plans didn’t include him even though she didn’t want to hurt him.

She never intended to fall in love and having to tell him she planned to return to Washington, permanently, pained her deeply. She doubted she’d ever get over him and knew she’d always love him.

Both Jenny and Manny were gone when she woke and Stede had left a rodeo ticket for her, taped to the microwave. Carolina took her time getting ready, not caring if she missed the parade or not. She was no longer in the mood, especially when she thought about the cowgirl groupies, that Jenny referred to as buckle bunnies, she saw hanging around the grounds on her way to the grandstand. She wondered which one of them might take her place in Stede’s heart after she was gone?

To marry Stede and be left alone in Arizona while he traveled would never work for her. No matter how convinced she was that he loved her, she’d never be certain he might not bring another woman to his bed when he was on the road. She was too insecure.

She didn’t have the luxury of grand amour propre to trust him to remain faithful because the temptation and the competition were too great for most people to handle. And that, she knew was not good for any relationship.

Everything she ever heard or read about a cowboy reminded her they were often loners, loved their freedom, and were considered drifters. They took life as they found it, and didn’t let everyday things get in their way. If they had problems or issues, they withdrew and dealt with them on their own, that is if you didn’t take into account a horse or a dog and a bottle of whiskey.

Most of them were lean and tall, like Stede, lived in their jeans, worked hard and played harder. She carried too many layers of rejection and hurt feelings already, to handle a cheating heart. She couldn’t cope with the heartbreak and she knew she’d be condemning their marriage to failure if she tried to confine him to staying home. He loved his independence and then there was always the fear he’d be seriously injured…

When she took her seat in the grandstand Jenny asked, “Are you all right, Carolina?”

She nodded. “I’m tired, that’s all. I didn’t sleep well.”

“You arrived in time to see the qualifying round of the team bronc.”

Carolina lifted the binoculars and focused on the number of the chute where Jenny told her to look. The gate opened and there seemed to be nothing but chaos as the team held the horse, while Stede saddled and mounted him and fought hard with all his strength to stay on long enough to reach the imaginary finish line.

There was a lot of noise and cheering for all the teams that competed. The Foster Ranch Team came in second in scoring points for this event. Carolina’s heart was in her mouth, as the saying went, the entire time.

She and Jenny watched the men compete in the calf and steer roping competition and she learned about Heading, Heeling and Bulldogging, and also learned to appreciate what great horsemanship was required to compete, not to mention the athletic ability of the men and animals.

One of the cowboys entered in the calf roping competition failed to get his loop around the calf’s neck in the allotted time, which meant, according to Jenny, it would now be impossible for him to place in the event.

Everyone watched as the rider pulled back violently hard in anger on the rope and caused the calf’s head to flip backward and the animal fell to the ground. The crowd stood, making disturbed sounds, then hushed and waited. Certain the man had broken the little calf’s neck, Carolina held her hand over her mouth.

The cowboy dismounted and rushed to tie its legs together, but Stede and some of the rodeo officials surrounded the small animal to keep the children attending from becoming overly upset, but you could hear some of the children as well as adults crying in the stands.

Carolina sat back down and looked at Jenny. “Is the calf dead?”

“I don’t know. They’re bringing out a cart now to remove the animal from the arena,” she said, pointing.

The officials on the address system tried to assure everyone, especially the young children, that the calf was going to be all right, and that the veterinarian would attend to him. The silence in the grandstand became deafening.

Whispering, Carolina asked, “Will they do anything to that cowboy?”

Jenny nodded. “Yes, he’ll be fined, maybe suspended for a while, and if the calf dies, he may lose his standings and license. A lot will depend on whether or not he’s had other infractions. Believe me, this doesn’t happen often, and this was blatant.”

Jenny stood. “Come on, follow me. We’ll go see what’s happening. I know where to find Stede.”

All Carolina knew at this point was how dangerous this sport was, not only for the riders, but also the animals. She felt sick to her stomach, but fortunately hadn’t bothered to eat before coming to the arena.

When she and Jenny approached the tent covered corral that was used to treat injured animals, Stede’s voice could be heard loud and clear. He had that cowboy by the front of his collar and ordered him out of there. “You’re lucky the calf is going to be all right. I hope to God you’re suspended for a long time and I hope, for your sake, I never to run into you again at any rodeo where I’m competing. Is that clear?”

The cowboy gestured with his hands, perhaps trying to apologize, but Stede turned his back on him. The cowboy threw his hands in the air and walked away, kicking gravel.

Jenny called to Stede to ask if he needed any help with the calf. He said, no, but thanked her for offering. He went back in the corral to take care of the calf that now struggled to stand. She and Jenny waited until Stede finished, and when he came he put his arms around both of them. “I’m sorry you had to see that. That kind of anger and abuse shown to an animal irritates me to the bone. Maybe one in about two thousand animals gets injured each year, but that was a deliberate act of vengeance on an innocent calf. I have to go wash up—you ladies want to get us a table and we’ll meet you for lunch.”

They nodded, and Stede kissed them both on the forehead and headed toward the trailer.

****

After lunch, Carolina and Jenny went back to the stands and watched the first round competition for Saddle Bronc Riding. Carolina kept her eyes shut during Stede’s short eight-second ride, holding her breath and praying with every fiber of her being until Jenny nudged her to let her know he finished.

Everyone tried to assure her that many safety precautions were taken not only for the rider, but also for the animal. But in this event, the animal seemed to be the winner most of the time. More riders limped out of the arena than walked.