MY MOTHER FIRST GAVE ME a Jane Austen book when I was thirteen, and I promptly got hooked, devouring romance on the regular. Whether it was a jealous duke, a ruined reputation, enemies to lovers, a dangerous mobster, or a threatening ex, the man always shows up to protect, to save the day. And even when the heroine saves herself, he still shows up to protect. It’s how he loves her. But what if, like me, you don’t need anyone to protect you, since there is almost nothing that can threaten you? What if you are better suited to protect him?
I’ll tell you what happens. He doesn’t want you anymore because you’re emasculating. I should know—I’ve lived it.
I lay in bed after my non-date with Aiden, fearing the little bonfire burning inside me. It was laughable, really, me with a crush. How long had it been? I thought that part of me had been sufficiently suffocated. It was his looks, sure, but mostly how he carried himself. It was his lack of self-doubt, his utter confidence in who he was, irrespective of what others thought of him.
I had no idea how he felt toward me anymore. Maybe attraction. Maybe absolutely nothing.
I let myself wonder if he could be more, if his seriously inflated ego was just the ticket to handle my strength. But I reminded myself he’d been nice for the sake of his sister. He was a man who, if he even wanted a relationship, could have his pick of women. He’d never pick someone like me, not once he knew the truth.
I needed to put this fire out. I would not read into something that wasn’t there, as much as a part of me ached for it. My future was set. I needed to get happy in that. That’s why I was here, seeing Doctor Evans. I wasn’t here to change anything, not in the long run. I wasn’t here to regress into a relationship that was bound for failure. I’d just end up back where I started.
So when I woke at dawn the next morning, staring at the ceiling, unable to stop thinking about his perfect, smug face, I reminded myself it wasn’t real. I felt like that girl in grade school the boys only pretended to like as a joke. Ugh. I was too old for this shit. Thirty-one and pining. It was pathetic.
I stood, giving up on sleep, and shuffled in my fuzzy slippers to the kitchen. I started the coffee and stared at it for a while as it brewed, then walked to the window, taking in the pink and blue hues peeking over the horizon of the lake. The job usually kept me up late at night, so I wasn’t one to see much of sunrises. I stepped onto the porch and took in the view. It’s always the simple things that make me realize how out of touch I’d been with the natural world.
As I stood watching, a figure came into view. Squinting against the glare, I recognized Aiden, strolling along the beach, picking up trash. He wore shorts and nothing else. And if I was impressed by the sunrise, it had nothing on this man.
He made his way to the parking lot down by the beach, where a large dumpster sat next to a recycling bin, and began sorting. He was too far away for me to enjoy the movement of his muscles the way I wanted, so I tore my gaze back to the sunrise, telling myself to snap out of it.
I stepped inside and filled my coffee mug, then came back out and settled into the porch chair, gazing in the direction of the sunrise, enjoying the cool air before the heat settled in.
“Got any for me?”
I jumped with a gasp, spilling scalding coffee everywhere.
“Fuck,” I uttered, brushing the liquid away from my bare legs.
“Oh shit.” Aiden leaped over the side railing with zero effort before realizing there wasn’t anything for him to do.
“I’m fucking sorry about that. I didn’t mean to scare you. I thought you saw me on the beach. Is it burning?”
I finally looked at him and saw the hard set of his lips, the look of regret on his face. He was actually concerned. I mentally swooned a little.
“It wasn’t that hot. It’s fine.”
“You sure?” His gaze snagged on my bare legs—my sleep shorts left little to the imagination. “Can I get you anything? Towel? Ice cubes?”
Feeling a little empowered as he continued to stare at my legs, I said, “You can get me a new cup of coffee.”
A grin emerged, and he held out his hand. “Hand it over,” he said, and I did, careful not to touch his hand for fear of losing my sanity. He disappeared inside Evie’s cottage.
I leaned back and took stock of myself, my long hair in a messy pony-tail, my face unwashed from the morning sleep. I hadn’t brushed my teeth yet.
The door opened, and he stepped out with two mugs, handing me one, his eyes staying above the neckline this time. “What was left in your cup looked pretty black, so I assume that’s how you take it?” He took a seat on Evie’s lounger. “Sorry again.”
He was staying. I tried and failed to keep my heart from fluttering. “Thanks. And stop apologizing.”
“Enjoy it. They are words you’ll likely never hear from me again.”
I placed my hand over my heart. “Is this special treatment from Aiden Anders? What did I do to deserve this dispensation?”
He rolled his eyes, and his lips tilted in amusement as he wrapped his hands around his mug and looked out at the lake.
We didn’t say anything for a while. He’d put on a shirt, thank goodness, but his tan legs were on view, golden hair covering hard muscles. I allowed myself a brief examination before returning my gaze to the lake.
“How often do you do that? Pick up trash, I mean?”
He grunted. “Most days.”
“Believe me, I wish I didn’t have to. People are fucking savages.”
“Is it that bad?”
“Not always. Today it was.”
The waves were large this morning after last night’s rain. They drove high onto the clean sand, pulling it back into the depths without the extra trash that Aiden had cleared.
“Maybe you’re not always an asshole.”
He looked at me, considering my words. “I wouldn’t count on it.”
I hid my smile behind my mug. “Evie was telling me you’re from Texas.”
“I am.”
“You moved here just for the cottages?” It wasn’t really a question, and he didn’t respond. “Were you close with your dad?”
“No. This is the only place he and I ever saw each other.”
“Will you stay then and keep the cottages? Run the place?”
He looked thoughtful, like it was a question he’d struggled with. “I’ve been modernizing the cottages, but my plan has always been to sell them and move back to Texas.”
“Hmmm.” I sipped my coffee. “But you have a woodshop set up and you teach at least two classes and pick up trash daily?”
He didn’t respond, but I could see his mind working it over.
“Isn’t it time for you to get to work?” he asked, raising an eyebrow.
I cleared my throat. “Checkout isn’t until eleven, sir.”
His eyes flashed, and he cleared his throat. “You’re doing a decent job, you and Evie. Not a complaint in sight.”
“Did anyone help Evie before I got here? Did you?”
“God no.”
“Why?”
He crinkled his brow, like the answer was obvious. “It’s woman’s work.”
My mouth dropped open, and he tried to keep a straight face, but the smirk emerged anyway, slowly turning into a low laugh.
“You’re a real shit, Aiden Anders, you know that?”
“So you’ve said. Before Evie came, I did it alone, then we worked together for months. But since you arrived, I’ve been off the hook. It was the part of the deal we struck to let you stay.”
“Seriously? You pretend my presence is such a burden, but really it frees up your time at no additional cost to you.”
He shrugged, not denying it. “It got me back to the woodshop.”
“I can’t believe you. Maybe Evie and I will take a break, and you can clean the cottages today,” I offered.
“Hard pass. I’ve got orders to fill.”
“Fine, but only because I wouldn’t want to deprive the world of your creations—your talent.”
His grin grew wider. “See, now that was nice. Well done.”
I rolled my eyes.
“Truth is, Evie could do whatever she wants. She’s good at everything, the little perfectionist. She had a good corporate PR job before she got sick, but right now, she wants to be here, doing this.” He sat forward, turning his body to face mine. “I won’t let her do it forever. Question is, why are you here?”
His eyes were close, and his intent gaze had me squirming.
“I told you, I was forced to use my stored vacation.”
“Okay, but why here? Why live with my sister? I assume you’re still getting a paycheck, so why work here doing this?” His tone turned direct, and I shrugged, feeling like he could see right through me. “What are you hiding from?”
“I didn’t have anything else to do,” I confessed. “She offered. And she’s fun and seems to not hate me. I don’t have a lot of people in my life since I work all the time.”
The truth of the words sunk in. How pathetic, a woman in her early thirties with no friends, no family, mooching off a complete stranger. “I thought you were on board—”
“It’s fine,” he interrupted. “I’m not trying to get rid of you. Not yet anyway.” He winked.
I grinned, uncrossing my legs and sitting up, needing to move. “I’ll do my best to stay on your good side. For now anyway.”
He chuckled softly. “Maybe I was a bit hard on you when you arrived. It wasn’t you.”
“No? You’re that way with every new visitor?”
He leaned back in the chair, his gaze back on the lake. “I just . . . I have a general aversion to beautiful women.”
I choked on my coffee and sputtered, leaning forward in a coughing fit, my face turning cherry red. Then Aiden was there, patting my back. “You okay?”
“Mm-hm,” I squeezed through coughs. When I finally got my breath, I wasn’t sure what to say. Did he just call me beautiful? “Coffee went down the wrong tube.”
“I gathered,” he said with humor, and I felt my skin continue to flame with embarrassment.
I cleared my throat. “Why do you have an aversion to women? Broken heart?”
“Nah, it’s more an aversion to people in general, I guess. Though my mother would say I was born with a broken heart.”
I finished my coffee but didn’t dare move, happy to sit next to him where I could sneak looks and wonder what was going on in his head, what his mother had meant with those words. “What were you doing before you got here?”
He stood up, and I thought he might leave, but he stopped and put his hand out. “Warm-up?”
I handed him my mug. “Always.”
Returning a few moments later, he handed me a fresh cup, and I held it close, blowing on the top before taking a sip. He leaned against the railing in front of me. “I was an environmental engineer.”
“Oh? What does an environmental engineer do exactly?”
He grinned and crossed one ankle over the other, giving me his full attention. “A lot of things, but I worked on new recycling technologies.”
I nodded and smiled, finally understanding a little bit about Aiden. “Anything I’d know?”
“I built a plant that extracts vanadium and other rare minerals from oil production waste, then neutralizes the waste for safe disposal.”
“Oh, sure. You mean the stuff they make in Wakanda. Captain America’s shield.”
He smiled. “That’s vibranium. This is vanadium. The key difference being one is a real substance and one is not. And I don’t make it; I extract it. But you’re not far off, because it’s used to make steel lighter and stronger.”
“And all this time I thought you were just a dumb, tyrant asshole.”
He shook his head with another grin. “Two out of three ain’t bad.”
More butterflies erupted in my stomach. “That’s what you’ll go back to?”
The humor faded from his face. “I should have been back weeks ago. I finished up the bulk of renovations a while back, enough to sell the cottages anyway. I told myself I’d go back when I was done. They were supposed to be sold by now.”
“I can’t believe you haven’t had offers. This place is a dream.”
“Haven’t listed it yet.”
I smiled. He loved the place, couldn’t let it go.
“You do seem to be settling in here with your woodshop, your tourists, and the teaching. Did you quit your job?”
“I took a longer leave, for now.”
“They must really like you.”
“I’m co-owner.” He stood straight and stepped out onto the sand before looking back at me. “I don’t know what I’ll do.”
“Well, what is the deciding factor?”
“I didn’t know at first.”
My heart sped up, though I couldn’t pinpoint exactly why. “And now?”
He grinned. “Now things are getting interesting.”
I swallowed, silenced by his words and his intent stare as he said them.
His smile got bigger. “Have a good day, Bernadette. Thanks for the coffee.” He set his mug on the railing and left me gaping on the front porch.