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Abigail gruffly awoke to someone banging loudly on her door. She had a nasty hangover even though she took pain reliever. She didn’t like the pounding happening in her head or on her door. Abbie looked at her phone quickly to see it was ten in the morning. She wondered if her father was coming to yell at her for missing their training session. She emerged from her bed in her short shorts and tank top to answer the door. She didn’t bother to put on a bra since she assumed it was her father at the door.
Abigail ripped open the door after the third round of knocking on her door. She was grumpy, tired, and struggling to stand upright. She knew her father would chastise her for drinking, but she didn’t care. She enjoyed feeling alive and wasn’t going against an opponent for several days, which was plenty of time to clean the alcohol out her system.
Upon opening the door, Abigail was met by a scrawny man holding a glass vase of red roses. He wore a huge grin surrounded by dimples in each of his cheeks. His shaggy dirty blonde hair was slightly combed away from his face. He was kind of attractive in a boyish type of way. He didn’t look anything like the men Abigail spent her time with. She was not impressed with the man at all.
The men in her life had muscles on top of muscles with gruff faces from fighting. They had dark and bold features to resemble their personalities. Abigail felt out of place with the man standing before her. His smile was nauseating as he tried to hand her the flowers in his hands. She put up her hands to signal him to stop.
“What are you doing here? No one ever buys me flowers. Those clearly aren’t mine.” Abigail retorted with a snarl.
“Are you Francesca?” The man asked, after reading the receipt.
“No... Maybe that’s the bimbo next door. Check the address again, Pretty Boy.” Abbie sneered.
“Hmmm... Isn’t this Apartment 305?”
“Nope. 205. One more flight of stairs.” Abbie pointed to the nearby stairway.
“I am so sorry. I didn’t mean to disrupt you...” The man claimed sweetly, bringing bile up from Abbie’s empty stomach.
“Yeah, whatever.” She answered, while starting to close her door.
“Wait. Why don’t people give you flowers?”
“Because nobody cares about me enough to buy me flowers.”
“I doubt that. What is your favorite flower?”
“I don’t have one.”
“Everyone has a favorite flower.” He smiled.
“Fine. I like lilies. Happy?” Abbie asked.
She was extremely bored with the conversation. Her mind started to wander to her reason for enjoying lilies. The seemingly kind man reminded her of her bitter reason for existence. Her mother always kept lilies in the house. It was one of the few memories Abbie had of her mother. Over time Abbie grew to love lilies again because they reminded her of her mother. Pain started to grip Abbie’s heart and her features. In a panic she slammed the door before the man could speak anymore. She heard him mutter something in shock then walk away from her door to deliver the beautiful roses.
Part of her was jealous to not be getting the roses. Then again, the thought of flowers nauseated her. Abbie cursed under her breath as she returned to her bed. She couldn’t stand thinking about her mother. The woman who birthed her messed up her life completely by abandoning her at the age of five. She left without telling Abbie or taking her with.
Abbie clearly remembered the fight her mother and father had the night her mother left. They argued about her father’s attendance at parties and his obsession with fighting. He wanted to have fun instead of coparenting. Abbie heard the entire heated argument which ended after her father hit her mom across the face.
Abigail was so young she didn’t fully understand what happened. The next morning, she woke up to see her father passed out on the couch, as usual, and the bedroom empty. Her mother left right after her father passed out.
Abbie started to cry in the doorway because her mommy was nowhere to be seen. Her father woke up abruptly and hit her across the face for crying. He started to run around the apartment in a panic after realizing her mom left while he was sleeping. Abbie hoped her mom would return, unfortunately she never did.
After her mother’s untimely departure, Abbie’s world blew up in a bad way. She started school, which provided a small escape for her, but her home life fell apart fast. Her father dove deeper into drinking and partying to cope with her mother leaving. Abbie was left with the nice neighbors next door almost every night.
Abigail thought if she could get good grades in school, then her father might be happy and want to keep her, unlike her mom. She was programmed to perform for love and acceptance at a young age after being rejected by her mom. Abbie’s heart was corrupted by the world view of love and the pain she experienced. Her father started hitting her once in a while if she cried. He didn’t know how to deal with his emotions much less a scared child.
He was a child himself who just started fighting full time in his career. He was only twenty when Abbie was born. His one-night stand turned into “the happiest moment” of his life. He had a good career on the rise, a wonderful woman to come home to, and a beautiful daughter with hidden potential. He lost everything because he royally messed up. He got drunk and slept around at parties while Abbie and her mom stayed home.
Abigail’s mom found out about her father, Vincent, sleeping around. Abbie didn’t blame her mom for leaving because she wanted to leave too. She would scream that famous line at the top of her lungs every day when her father started hitting her more frequently. He would hit her harder then tell her to leave if she didn’t like it. She ran away a couple times after school. Police always found her and brought her back home. Her father’s face was splashed across the newspaper for being a good fighter but a terrible father.
He didn’t see a decline in Abbie’s behavior, so he was forced to quit fighting. The police department and social services threatened him with removing Abbie from the home if she didn’t stop running away or getting into fights at school. They didn’t know the fights covered up her bruises from her father.
Her father couldn’t handle losing another piece of his precious life. He quit drinking and boxing full time to sell electronics and make a stable income. He finally saw a slight change in Abbie because she stopped running from home. Little did he know, she was running away at night to fight on the streets.
Her father felt guilty because he knew he was to blame for Abbie’s fighting streak. He took her under his wing to help her along with fighting professionally, unlike his father. Vincent wanted to be different than his father. Unfortunately, he looked around at his life to see he was just like him. A drunk with an aggressive streak. He never thought he would hit a woman, much less his own child.
Abbie found out all the information about her father after he got sober and started talking. He apologized for his behavior, blaming it on his father and the circumstances. Unfortunately, it was too late. Her heart was set in the hard concrete of the jungle surrounding them. She refused to change just because her father finally did. She drank once in a great while, but nothing like he used to. She refused to sleep with any man because she wanted to ensure she didn’t get pregnant. It wasn’t morality holding her captive, rather fear of losing her career and life because of one stupid decision, like her father.
Abbie debated whether or not to try to sleep. The moment in the hallway shook up memories and feelings from the past. She wanted to escape the ache in her heart and the pressure on her mind. She tried to sleep a little longer but found herself restless. She didn’t like her altercation with the floral man. She hoped to never see him again. He seemed too cheery and kind for her taste.
Abigail emerged from her bed after hearing the couple start up again next door. Don’t these people have jobs or a sleep schedule. UGHHHH. Abigail thought to herself. She suddenly remembered it was Saturday. She hit her head against her pillow a couple times while the banging on the other side of the wall got louder. Abbie threw off her blankets in frustration. She put on fresh workout clothes to go for a run to clear her head. She couldn’t handle the sounds coming from her neighbor’s apartment. She enjoyed running a five-mile run in the heat of the day to escape.
She was happy to get away and enjoy the peace of working out. She found solace in the rush of the run. Each time she fought or worked out she felt free. The world stopped around her to let her breath. Each session she pushed her body further to ensure she always remained on top in the pros. She didn’t want to fall or lose focus like her father.
Abbie felt her phone vibrate in her pocket with a new message from her father. He wanted to meet about new fights and a training schedule. He still worked full time selling electronics since he refused to take a salary from Abbie. She paid him by feeding him or buying groceries for his apartment. He didn’t make a fuss if she showed up with food since he still ate junk food by the bag.
Abigail learned how to cook for herself since her father didn’t know how. In high school she took a couple classes to learn how to make the basics. Eventually she bought cookbooks or looked up recipes until she found a cooking groove of her own.
Abbie responded to her father’s message quickly then started walking to his apartment. He still lived in the same strange and dangerous part of town. Abbie was thankful she found an apartment on the edge of the poor part of Bronx. She had fairly decent neighbors, except for the noise maker next door. Abbie wasn’t home enough to enjoy get togethers or community outreaches. She was happy to avoid the mushy moments because they made her uncomfortable. She wasn’t used to love and happiness. Gruff force and attitude was more her style.
Her father welcomed her inside his apartment then they started going over his work schedule to sync their training schedule. Abigail was making enough with her fights to stay out of a part time job. She had a good record in the ring since she hadn’t lost a fight once nor allowed anyone close enough to injure her. Her seven-year career was setting her up as a queen in the fight world. She felt like she was on the top of the world again. She was more afraid of losing her position in her career than ever.
“Abbie... Abigail...” Her father called out.
“Hmm... Sorry, I got distracted.”
“I see that. What’s on your mind?”
“Dad, were you ever afraid of losing everything? Like your reputation and career, I mean.”
“All the time, Kiddo. My life revolved around fighting then worrying about my relevancy. I had a wakeup call about what truly mattered when your mother got pregnant then left. She showed me what I really needed to worry about. Boxing is fun and it’s a great career for the moment. You can’t keep boxing all your life though because times change, and people change. I don’t want to discourage you, but you won’t always be on the top... Eventually there will be one lost match or one injury that causes it all to go downhill. I actually got out of the boxing game right on time because other fiercer opponents came in shortly after I departed. I don’t want to see you get hurt or die because of boxing.”
“Dad, I will be fine. I’m fast and quick with my moves. I’m practically untouchable.”
“Yes, but one day you won’t be so fast. Abbie, think about what truly matters to you. Don’t you want to have someone to share life with or a family one day?”
“No.”
“Why not?”
“Because I think relationships are poisonous. There is a fine line between love and respect versus used and abused. I don’t want to turn out like you and mom. I would rather stay detached and win matches in my career. Relationships ruin focus. I’m surprised you haven’t noticed how I never have a man around me.”
“Well, I wasn’t sure if you were keeping that part of your life hidden from me...”
“Nope. My personal life is nonexistent.”
“That is really sad. Don’t die alone, Abbie.”
“You don’t have anyone in your life.” Abbie retorted with a snort.
“I have been seeing a woman actually... Her name is Gina.”
“Now who’s hiding their personal life?”
“I’m your father. That’s different!”
“Uh huh.”
“I want you to meet Gina someday soon... Maybe Thursday?”
“Fine. Would you like me to cook something or are we going out?” Abbie asked, begrudgingly.
“We will go out. I don’t want you slaving over the stove and keeping yourself hidden because you have an excuse.”
Dang it... He saw right through me there. I don’t really want to endure another one of his stupid dates. His last date was horrible. She was controlling and using my dad to stay home worry free. She used his paycheck to buy lottery tickets and fancy attire. I had to talk some sense into him otherwise he was going to marry her. And he wonders why I don’t want to be with anyone! I don’t need anyone using me or my hard-earned paycheck to just “sit” around. If I did meet someone they would have to work hard too. They would need to have their own income to ensure I don’t foot the bill for everything. Abbie thought to herself.
“You faded out there again. Are you okay?” Her father asked.
“Yeah. I didn’t get much sleep last night. My neighbor has his bimbo over this weekend for a slumber party. They have been celebrating in his bedroom at all hours of the day and night.”
“Ah... I see.”
“Yep. I got five hours of sleep last night since an idiot florist got the address wrong for his delivery. He woke me up then tried to give me the flowers. It was so awkward and boring. He asked me what my favorite flower was and everything. I really hope I never see him again.”
“Sounds like a nice kid. Why didn’t you give him a chance?”
“Because he seemed too cheery and mushy for my liking.”
“Abbie, that doesn’t seem like a good reason. You don’t even know the guy. If you do see him again you should give him a chance... You never know what might happen. Not everyone is like your old man, you know.”
“I know. I just don’t want to see him again. I don’t do nice guys.”
“According to you, you don’t do anyone period.” Her father retorted quickly.
“Exactly. Glad you’re listening.”
Abbie stood up from her father’s rickety couch. He needed a new couch since it was the same one, he had for past twenty years. The junky thing was practically falling apart at the seams. Abbie could recall seeing her father sleepily resting on the couch throughout the years. It was the one time he looked at peace.
Abbie wanted to get home to relax and chug water. Her father walked her out to ensure she got out of the neighborhood safely. He claimed to be going for a walk, but Abbie knew better. She wasn’t afraid of hitting someone if they got to close to her. Her father on the other hand was very concerned. He knew the neighborhood was full of weapons, drugs, gang members, and a hatred for people who could actually make something of themselves.
Abbie thanked her father for the safe walk and schedule creation. She knew her career relied on her father, although she never wanted to rely on him during any part of her life. She was reminded of the moments she wanted to run away from him throughout her life. They finally got on good ground once she started fighting, however the relationship was still strained.
Abbie returned home to hear moaning and more love making happening next door. She boldly knocked on the door next door. After three rounds of pounding on the door a blonde woman wearing a bra and shorts answered. Abbie threatened the chick to end all exercise by ten otherwise she was walking over with police. The woman shook her head in agreement with wide eyes. Abbie returned to her apartment to relax. At ten the room fell silent.
Abbie was thankful for the silence so she could finally sleep. She hated having horny neighbors. She hoped the woman decided to leave the sleezeball next door. He was a real piece of work. After living in the apartment for five years, Abbie knew enough about her surroundings. The man next door moved in nearly a year ago. He went through a new woman every month unless he found someone else more appealing.
He tried to make a move on Abbie when he first moved in but quickly learned she didn’t date and certainly didn’t sleep with anyone. She got to endure his disgusting escapades with women from the other side of the paper-thin wall. It was enough to make her want to move. She loved her apartment though and didn’t want to move anytime soon.
Abbie snuggled down into her bed to enjoy a good night sleep. She hoped the next day wouldn’t be any different from her usual routine. She didn’t want to deal with stupid people or drama. She was about to fall asleep when her phone beeped with a new message. She forgot to shut off her ringtone. She rolled over to shut off the ringtone. She noticed a new text from a familiar phone number, but she couldn’t remember who it belonged to. She decided to ignore the text message. She shut off her ringer then fell asleep immediately.
