It’s a little dramatised, like any true crime I guess. I smile at Sissy on screen. She’s such a sweet woman. Maggie, too, looks nervous but does well. When Shane comes on screen I run my thumb over his hand, to show him I’m there. That even though he didn’t want to do it, and I gave him little choice, it’s all going to be okay. He blinks at the screen, stiff. It’s hard, as he talks about how he met Zanna, their relationship, but I bear it. It’s history, I tell myself. The past. The past can’t hurt you.
His last shot is of him speaking to the camera, so handsome.
“What is in the future for you and Paige?” the producer asks.
Shane smiles, shy like a little boy. “I don’t know. All I know is I’m lucky. Your ex being murdered, it’s a whole load of baggage. But Paige has been through the exact same thing, has the same baggage. We help each other carry it, you know?”
He looks so sweet. Like he means it. A rare look of innocence on his face when he talks about how lucky he is to have me. The sensation of new tears smarts in my eyes.
They kept the scene at the gala when Angela accused me. I had hoped they would, to stir some sympathy in the viewers. To show what I had to go through, the results of speculation. In the boutique cinema theatre, Angela’s head swivels towards Sheryl now, faster than a cat who’s seen a pigeon. Angela starts furiously whispering as she sways in the footage, pointing her finger in my face and her eyes narrowing. The cameras zoom in on me. My lip wobbles, meek and terrified.
Gianna takes her pot shots at me. But these are undignified slurs amid my sensitive interviews about the ramifications of trolling and online abuse. Jessica Baines singing my praises and proclaiming my innocence sounds like a beautiful melody.
A voiceover booms: “Mason Hicks was found guilty of murder by a jury. He is serving a life sentence.”
I smile. It’s still a relief, hearing that verdict, after all these years.
My breath hitches. It’s myself on the screen for the final interview piece.