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“COME ON, MOM,” I TOLD my mother, slipping an arm around her shoulders. “You need to get back inside. There’s nothing else we can do here.”
“I just...I can’t....” she began. She was trembling as she stood next to me, watching the last of the flames doused beneath the fire engine’s hose.
I couldn’t believe this. I was standing in front of Warren’s house, looking at the wrecked remains of his home. How had this happened? Was I to blame for this? I felt like I was going to throw up. It was so surreal, like something out of a nightmare, except this wasn’t one I could wake up from. No, this was a nightmare I was well and truly trapped in, and I didn’t know how I was going to escape from it.
I guided my mom back inside the house, even though it was clear she wasn’t ready to walk away from the nightmare in front of us quite yet. I wished she didn’t have to see this, but I was sure Tony had wanted to send us a message—a message we couldn’t ignore, one that drove home how much power he had over us and proved how far he was willing to go to get what he wanted.
I sat Mom down on the couch and headed to the kitchen, where Warren was comforting Silver. The dog was curled up on the floor, her whole body shaking, and I dropped down beside him to do my best to make her feel better.
“How is she?” I asked, though the answer was obvious.
“I don’t know,” Warren replied, his voice taut. I wasn’t sure how to speak to him about this. I wanted to ask him how he was doing, how he was navigating this nightmare, but it seemed like too obvious an answer to bother him with that. He was wrecked by this, of course he was. How could it have been anything else? I didn’t know how I was supposed to make it right for him, with his home in smoldering ashes next door, but I would do whatever it took to make that happen.
“I’ll make us some tea,” I offered. It wasn’t much, but it was the only thing I could think of right now. I filled the kettle with water, and as I did so, my eyes drifted back to the house next door. Where there had once stood a building, there was nothing left but the ashes and dust and blackened furniture that made up the last of Warren’s possessions. I couldn’t even imagine how he was feeling right now, having to watch his whole life torn away from him like this, especially after everything he had already been through.
“Let’s go check on Diane, girl,” he murmured to Silver, and the two of them headed through to the living room. I felt a lump in my throat. Even at a time like this, he was still focused on the people around him—he was still willing to do whatever it took to make sure they were okay. He had been through hell, and I had just brought another dose of it to his doorstep, but he was acting like he was more worried about my mother than himself.
Once the kettle had boiled, I made us all a cup of tea—with plenty of sugar to try and help with the shock—then carried it out to the living room, where my mother was staring off into space, her face as pale as a ghost. She hadn’t looked this bad since the accident, and I was sure this would put her back in her recovery a few steps. How could it not? She had just witnessed a horror that most people wouldn’t have to face in their entire lives.
And it had all happened because of me.
I pressed the warm cup of tea into her hand, and the feel of it seemed to bring her back down to Earth for a moment. She looked up at me, her eyes distant and hazy.
“Are you okay?” she asked me. I nodded.
“We’re all okay, Mom,” I assured her. “Silver, Warren, me—we're all okay.”
“Thank goodness,” she sighed, and she lifted the tea to her lips. I handed another cup to Warren, and then took a seat opposite my mom so I could keep an eye on her. When the adrenaline and shock wore off, I knew she was going to collapse with exhaustion, and I wanted to get her to bed as quickly as possible.
“You should really get some rest, Diane,” Warren told her, his mind the same place mine was. She shook her head.
“I don’t know how I’m going to be able to sleep after tonight,” she replied, lowering her gaze to the ground. “I...I didn’t know people were capable of things like this. It just doesn’t feel real...”
I knew exactly what she was trying to say, and it killed me to hear her in so much pain. She must have known who had been responsible for this, even if she wasn’t saying it out loud—Tony. Tony had been the one to start that fire, whether directly or not, and he was making sure we received a message loud and clear about what was going on here. He was the one calling the shots, and he wanted us to know it.
We sat there in silence, only able to hear the conversation of the firefighters outside and then the roar of the engine as it took off. Between us, the quiet hung heavily, none of us knowing what to say or how to react.
Mom finished her tea, and I got to my feet.
“Come on, Mom,” I told her again. “Let’s get you to bed.”
She shook her head. “I don’t want to sleep.”
“You need it,” Warren told her gently. “Silver, too. She won’t be able to rest until he knows you’re okay.”
Mom looked at the dog for a moment, and her eyes softened, as though she was taking her into account. She smiled.
“I suppose you’re right,” she agreed, and she rose from the wheelchair to her feet, stretching her arms above her head. I went over to her and caught her by the waist, not wanting her to collapse so soon after all of this. I didn’t want to have to get the emergency services out here again, not after what had just happened.
I called for Silver and led the two of them up the stairs to the bedroom. She was still shaky, but I could feel the way her body was starting to give out, the sheer stress and horror more than she could handle right now.
In her room, I helped her into bed and patted the end of it so Silver could jump up to join her. I was pretty sure Mom needed her tonight more than she needed Mom, but she probably didn’t see it that way.
“Are you going to be okay?” she asked me, eyes wide as she looked up at me in the dark.
“Of course I will, Mom,” I assured her. “The fire’s out, and—”
“Not just the fire,” she corrected me. “I mean...everything else. With Tony.”
She did her best not to speak his name if she could avoid it, but the way it hung in the air between us now made the hairs on the back of my neck stand on end. I didn’t know what to say to her. I wished I could tell her that, yes, it was all going to be all right, she had nothing at all to worry about, but how could I say that and really mean it? I had no idea how far he was going to take things, and the thought of that scared the shit out of me. I would never have imagined he would go this far, burning down Warren’s house, but I was sure this had something to do with him.
I just had to find a way to prove it.
“Yes, Mom,” I promised her, and she pulled me into a sudden, tight hug—gripping on to me with all her might, like she never wanted to let me go.
“You stay safe, sweetheart,” she murmured to me, and I quickly blinked back tears before she could spot them.
“I will,” I breathed, hoping she believed me. I couldn’t imagine how horrifying this was to her. I had protected her from as much as I could, but seeing her face with something like this—it was beyond what I could have imagined, and I hated that it had had to happen like this.
“You get some sleep,” I told her, pulling back and heading for the door. She reached down to pet Silver, and I pulled the door shut behind me, leaning against it to catch my breath.
I couldn’t stop the tears falling then. I knew they wouldn’t do me any good, but I couldn’t stop myself. I wanted to go and find Tony right now, I wanted to wring his neck and tell him that he would never get away with what he had done to us, but what good would it have done? He was getting away with it. At every turn, he was winning, and I wasn’t sure if there was anything I could do to change that.
I pulled myself together. Warren needed me now, and the last thing that would have been any good to him was if I came out there bawling my eyes out and needing his support. He was the one who had lost his home, after all—he was the one who needed all the help he could get.
I inhaled a deep, shaky breath, wiped my eyes, and headed down the stairs. This was no time for crying.
No, this was time for action.
