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AS WE SAT IN THE CAR together, I couldn’t help but feel a pulse of hope.
It was the first time I had even allowed myself to think that way since the fire. There seemed to be no good reason to even entertain the idea that there was a way out of this. It had felt like the grip the McCarthys had on the town was just too strong to get rid of, too strong to pull away from, but we’d just seen a glimpse of something else—of people who were on our side, people who had been harmed by this man just the same way we had.
“I can’t believe it,” Lily murmured, shaking her head. “Do you think he meant it? Everything he said?”
I nodded.
“I don’t see any reason why he would have come out with all of that if he didn’t,” I replied. “He seemed pretty genuine. I know we can’t be totally sure about anyone right now, but that’s about as close as it’s going to come.”
Lily paused for a moment, looking out the window.
“There’s something I didn’t tell you, actually,” she admitted quietly after a moment. My heart skipped a beat, and I glanced over at her.
“What’s up, Lil? You know you can tell me anything.”
She chewed her lip.
“You remember when you were out for a walk with my mom and Silver a couple of days after the fire?”
I nodded. When we had gotten back from that walk, something had been off about her, and I hadn’t been able to put my finger on it. I’d dismissed it as stress left over from the attack, but maybe there had been something more to it, after all.
“I got a visitor,” she explained.
“You did?”
“Someone from the fire department” she continued. “He gave me his card. He was asking about...asking if I’d seen anything on the night of the fire, you know?”
I gripped the wheel a little tighter.
“And did you tell him anything?”
She shook her head. A wave of relief passed over me. I should never have doubted her. She was smart when it came to all of this; she knew how to handle herself, how to make sure she didn’t give away anything she didn’t want to.
“I wasn’t sure if he might have been working for Tony and his father,” she admitted. “So I just played dumb. Told him I didn’t see anything.”
“Do you think he believed you?”
“I don’t,” she confessed. “The way he was talking to me, it was almost like he...like he knew that Tony had something to do with this, and he wanted to get to the bottom of it. He was pressing me for more, to give him a name of someone who I might have seen there, but I just didn’t feel comfortable saying anything to him, especially not without you there.”
“You made the right call,” I assured her. “We can’t go spilling everything we know just like that. It’s way too dangerous.”
“Exactly,” she agreed. “But maybe...maybe there are more people on our side than we thought. And maybe he’s one of them.”
I paused as I considered it. It would have made a huge difference if we could really have people on our side in all of this. I had been operating under military rules, sure that anyone I didn’t know for certain was an ally was out to get us, but maybe I needed to drop that and focus on what was right in front of me—that we weren’t the only ones who had an issue with Tony and his father. They had been causing chaos in this town for a long time now, and I doubted it had gone completely unnoticed.
“You still have his card?” I asked, and she nodded.
“We should give him a call.”
“Yeah, maybe,” she replied. “I’m still not totally sure about him. I’d like confirmation he’s on our side before we tell him anything else.”
I grimaced but nodded. She was right. We couldn’t be too quick to trust anyone.
“We’ll wait and see what he does next,” I suggested.
“Yeah, let’s play it by ear,” she agreed. “He’ll show his hand if he’s really on our side with all of this.”
We drove the rest of the way home, talking about Rocco and Frank, wondering who else out there in this town had an issue with the McCarthy family.
“I know I can’t be the only woman he’s done this to,” she pointed out. “We know about Madison, but there have to be more of us out there. A guy like that, he doesn’t just get his fill and then stop. He’s addicted to treating women this way.”
“You’re right,” I agreed. “It might be tough getting them to come forward, though. They might still be scared of him.”
“Strength in numbers,” she pointed out. “The more of us who go up against him, the harder it’s going to be for him to refute all of us.”
I smiled.
“What is it?” she asked, frowning in confusion.
“I’m just...really fucking proud of you,” I told her, reaching out to give her knee a squeeze as we drew up outside the house.
“What for?” she replied. She still didn’t really get it.
“Because you’re standing up to this guy,” I replied, turning to face her as I shut off the engine. “You went through so much at his hands, and he’s still trying to scare you off, but you’re not letting it get to you. You’re just...pushing through it. You’re moving forward. And you’re going to help so many other women in the long-term, so many women who he would have gone on to target if he didn’t have someone like you getting in his way.”
She drooped her head down to her chest.
“I should have done it sooner,” she muttered. “There shouldn’t have been anyone after me. I should have brought an end to it right then and there—”
“Hey,” I cut her off, catching her chin in my hand and tilting it around to face me. “You can’t think like that. Okay? You did what you had to do to survive. Look at the way he’s acted since you got back—you got out because you had to. I don’t even want to think about how bad things would have gotten if you’d stayed.”
She nodded and tilted her face into my hand.
“You’re right,” she whispered. “I...I just feel so guilty about it.”
“You don’t have to,” I promised her. “You’re so strong, Lily. And so damn brave. I spent years in the army, and I’m not sure I ever met someone with your nerve before.”
She smiled up at me. “Really?”
I leaned forward to kiss her. “Really.”
She leaned her head against mine for a moment, and I felt her let out a breath. I knew she was carrying so much with her after everything she had been through, so much pain and doubt—so many questions about whether she had done the right thing, whether it had been acceptable for her to walk away from her life to escape the man who had been tormenting her.
But I would do whatever it took to get her to see that she was strong, and brave, and powerful. And that Tony didn’t have a clue what he was up against.
I led her into the house, knowing this was going to be a tough night for her. I was glad, at least, that I could be here with her, though it wasn’t as though I had much of a choice, after what had happened to my place.
The house felt empty without Diane in it, though Silver sprang up to rush over and say hello. Lily patted her head, and I smiled at the sight of them together. I knew she loved that dog more than anything in the world, and I was glad nothing had happened to her on the night of the fire. She would never have been able to forgive herself. And Tony might have been a monster, but would he really come after an innocent animal like that? Despite what I knew about him, it was hard to believe.
I sank down into a chair, and Lily turned to smile at me. There was a peace in her face that I hadn’t seen in a long time, at least not since the night of the fire. I wanted to do everything I could to make sure it stayed there. No matter what, she deserved to feel this safe and happy all the time.
And with a few more allies on our side, that might be easier than I had thought. I slipped my hand down the side of the armchair and pulled out the card Lily had stashed there before. I looked down at the name and number, studying it, trying to work out if this was someone else we could trust.
Like she said, they would show their hand eventually. And we would know for sure which way this thing was going to go.
