Callista tried not to fall asleep but she was exhausted. So incredibly exhausted.
Her eyes slid shut. And then the visions came for her.
***
The Desine returned to the deserts alone, so that his son could live as a man, raised by a woman.
Kuin of the Bretani, so long abandoned, raised her hands to the sky and called upon her god. The cold night air drifted over her skin, but she refused to shiver, to let it distract her.
And then, a minute later — she felt him.
‘Desine,’ she murmured. ‘You have seen what my brother does to our tribe. I have no right to fight him. I know. I know this. But…’
It is not wrong to look after your people, Chief Kuin.
Kuin fell to her knees and sobbed as the desert god swirled around her in his insubstantial form. He had returned to guide her. And yet…she heard a mournful note on the winds. The Desine had returned to his deserts, but he was missing some vital part of himself.
She dared not ask.
***
When the Desine’s son was a baby, they came for him. The gods laid waste to Atsa City, its smoking ruins a reminder that no one, not even a desert god, could forget his past. Fayay defeated all those who stood in his path, then took the child and raised him with hate in his heart.
Kuin of the Bretani, now so much older, trundled over the dunes, seeking water. Pausing to rest and lifting her hood, Kuin squinted at the sky. She regretted coming here now that the suns had chased away the shadows of night and any remnants of the promise her god had given her. It had been so long since she had thought of her brother, of the people dying beneath him. But she had seen him in a dream last night, older and meaner, beating his fists into flesh.
She stopped on the dune where her god had asked to meet her, nervous, fearful. He was not like his father. He was untested.
The Desine’s son came to her.
He walked up the dune like a man, shedding his own hood and waving up at her as though he was greeting a friend. The dark shadows in his eyes gave her pause and he blazed with unparalleled power, but he wouldn’t hurt her. Surely he wouldn’t.
‘Kuin of the Bretani,’ he said. ‘I am sorry the Desine let you down. But I’m here now. And I will destroy your brother for what he has done, just as I will destroy anyone who dares to deviate from my plans for them.’
Kuin looked down at the palms he spread before her. They were bare of scars.
He had never met a wife.
***
The Desine took his son to the deserts. They did not need the mortal woman who had tried to chain them, who had only wanted them so long as they abandoned a part of themselves.
Again, Kuin of the Bretani walked the dunes. But this time a man holding a baby approached her. They were both gods and there was no one to hold them back.
No one to care for them as they cared for others.
***
Callista rose from the bed that had trapped her with its soft sheets and nightmares. There was a presence near her, around her, suffocating her. She threw out a violent thought and the chair in the corner of the room flew through empty air before shattering against the wall.
‘There are many more possible futures that you could see, if you tried to,’ the Ine said, completely unharmed and indifferent. ‘The same fear that makes you seek these visions also keeps you from seeing them all.’
Callista hesitated, but did not attack him again. She could not defend herself against the Creator God. Instead, she said, ‘I can’t trust whatever you show me. You have an agenda, Ine. You always did when it came to me.’
His smile wasn’t completely patronising or warm, but somewhere in the middle. ‘Are you afraid that there is no place for you beside a god? Afraid that once you leave this city, where you are known and have great political power, that you will no longer be someone?’
‘That’s not why,’ she said, shivering. It was impossible to maintain eye contact.
‘My grandson has come,’ the Ine said, heading for the door. ‘And soon so will Fayay. Anywhere you go, he will follow.’
‘Then stop him!’ Callista cried. ‘Why won’t you stop him?’
He did not need to answer. She already knew why.
The Ine would have a god in the deserts, one way or another.
***
Callista opened her eyes and stared up at the ceiling, confused by the web of dreams she had been catapulted from. Slowly, she began to focus on the faces in front of her. Sandsa. Ala.
‘I…what happened?’ Callista asked, struggling up against the cushions.
Ala chuckled and patted her on the shoulder. ‘You took a nap. Not that any of us can blame ya, pushin’ out that kid of yours.’
As Sandsa delivered the dozing baby into her arms, Callista felt a surge of power emanate from her son. He was stronger than her, and so much stronger than his father. Sandsa’s smile betrayed his pride. He felt it too.
‘I don’t know what to call him,’ Callista murmured.
‘Got plenty of time to sort that out,’ Ala said, grinning. ‘Now rest. I gotta go tell everyone you’re not dead.’
Once her friend left, Callista sighed. But I have next to no time left in Atsa.
‘My love, are you alright?’ Sandsa asked, sitting on the bed beside her. ‘Even though you cannot see him, Kuja is here, guarding us. We are safe.’
‘I somehow doubt that,’ Callista said, gritting her teeth and thinking of the Ine’s intrusion into her dreams. Her son stirred in her arms. Tiny chips of blue peeked from beneath his eyelids.
Sandsa’s gaze rose to the ceiling. ‘We must leave soon. Some of my brothers and sisters may not want to hurt mortals but Fayay has never used a gentle hand when dealing with them.’
Callista’s heart shuddered in her chest. The denial remained trapped behind her teeth.
Sandsa frowned at her.
‘I know we can’t stay! I don’t want Ala or Bock or any of them to get hurt!’ she burst out, then lowered her voice when her son screwed up his face.
‘Your greatest wish was to leave this planet a year ago,’ he reminded her.
Callista shook her head. ‘Wanting to leave isn’t the same thing as actually doing it. I like it here. I have Ala, Bock, Kick…and I did something. I was someone!’
‘You will have many more lifetimes to do something and become someone, I promise you,’ Sandsa said. He pointed at one of the windows, where they could see a ship streaking towards the sky. ‘There are many worlds out there, Callista.’
The sigh tormented her chapped lips. ‘So long as they don’t have any deserts. Or oceans. Or anything.’
Callista wriggled away from her husband and picked up a techpad. She swiftly began to scroll through the list of planets they were considering for their next destination, steadfastly ignoring the tremble in the hand that held the device. ‘Sandsa…nowhere is safe. We will be exposing innocent people to collateral damage wherever we go.’
‘But we will be together,’ he said.
Callista closed her eyes and built even higher walls inside her mind, shutting him out, hiding the visions of what could be.
Sandsa kissed her forehead and bent to extract her son from her arms.
‘No!’ Callista protested.
Sandsa paused. ‘My love?’
‘Stay with me, both of you,’ she whispered.